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"clanging" poems
I. Hear the sledges with the bells— Silver bells! What a world of merriment their melody foretells! How they ****** ****** ****** In their icy air of night! While the stars, that oversprinkle All the heavens, seem to twinkle With a crystalline delight; Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the tintinnabulation that so musically wells From the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— From the jingling and the tinkling of the bells. II. Hear the mellow wedding bells, Golden bells! What a world of happiness their harmony foretells! Through the balmy air of night How they ring out their delight! From the molten golden-notes, And all in tune, What a liquid ditty floats To the turtle-dove that listens, while she gloats On the moon! Oh, from out the sounding cells, What a gush of euphony voluminously wells! How it swells! How it dwells On the future! how it tells Of the rapture that impels To the swinging and the ringing Of the bells, bells, bells, Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— To the rhyming and the chiming of the bells! III. Hear the loud alarum bells— Brazen bells! What a tale of terror now their turbulency tells! In the startled ear of night How they scream out their affright! Too much horrified to speak, They can only shriek, shriek, Out of tune, In a clamorous appealing to the mercy of the fire, In a mad expostulation with the deaf and frantic fire Leaping higher, higher, higher, With a desperate desire, And a resolute endeavor Now—now to sit or never, By the side of the pale-faced moon. Oh, the bells, bells, bells! What a tale their terror tells Of Despair! How they clang, and clash, and roar! What a horror they outpour On the ***** of the palpitating air! Yet the ear it fully knows, By the twanging, And the clanging, How the danger ebbs and flows; Yet the ear distinctly tells, In the jangling, And the wrangling, How the danger sinks and swells, By the sinking or the swelling in the anger of the bells— Of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— In the clamor and the clangor of the bells! IV. Hear the tolling of the bells— Iron bells! What a world of solemn thought their monody compels! In the silence of the night, How we shiver with affright At the melancholy menace of their tone! For every sound that floats From the rust within their throats Is a groan. And the people—ah, the people— They that dwell up in the steeple. All alone, And who toiling, toiling, toiling, In that muffled monotone, Feel a glory in so rolling On the human heart a stone— They are neither man nor woman— They are neither brute nor human— They are Ghouls: And their king it is who tolls; And he rolls, rolls, rolls, Rolls A paean from the bells! And his merry ***** swells With the paean of the bells! And he dances, and he yells; Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the paean of the bells— Of the bells: Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the throbbing of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells— To the sobbing of the bells; Keeping time, time, time, As he knells, knells, knells, In a happy Runic rhyme, To the rolling of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells— To the tolling of the bells, Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— To the moaning and the groaning of the bells.
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10.5k
The Bells
I. Hear the sledges with the bells— Silver bells! What a world of merriment their melody foretells! How they ****** ****** ****** In their icy air of night! While the stars, that oversprinkle All the heavens, seem to twinkle With a crystalline delight; Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the tintinnabulation that so musically wells From the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— From the jingling and the tinkling of the bells. II. Hear the mellow wedding bells, Golden bells! What a world of happiness their harmony foretells! Through the balmy air of night How they ring out their delight! From the molten golden-notes, And all in tune, What a liquid ditty floats To the turtle-dove that listens, while she gloats On the moon! Oh, from out the sounding cells, What a gush of euphony voluminously wells! How it swells! How it dwells On the future! how it tells Of the rapture that impels To the swinging and the ringing Of the bells, bells, bells, Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— To the rhyming and the chiming of the bells! III. Hear the loud alarum bells— Brazen bells! What a tale of terror now their turbulency tells! In the startled ear of night How they scream out their affright! Too much horrified to speak, They can only shriek, shriek, Out of tune, In a clamorous appealing to the mercy of the fire, In a mad expostulation with the deaf and frantic fire Leaping higher, higher, higher, With a desperate desire, And a resolute endeavor Now—now to sit or never, By the side of the pale-faced moon. Oh, the bells, bells, bells! What a tale their terror tells Of Despair! How they clang, and clash, and roar! What a horror they outpour On the ***** of the palpitating air! Yet the ear it fully knows, By the twanging, And the clanging, How the danger ebbs and flows; Yet the ear distinctly tells, In the jangling, And the wrangling, How the danger sinks and swells, By the sinking or the swelling in the anger of the bells— Of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— In the clamor and the clangor of the bells! IV. Hear the tolling of the bells— Iron bells! What a world of solemn thought their monody compels! In the silence of the night, How we shiver with affright At the melancholy menace of their tone! For every sound that floats From the rust within their throats Is a groan. And the people—ah, the people— They that dwell up in the steeple. All alone, And who toiling, toiling, toiling, In that muffled monotone, Feel a glory in so rolling On the human heart a stone— They are neither man nor woman— They are neither brute nor human— They are Ghouls: And their king it is who tolls; And he rolls, rolls, rolls, Rolls A paean from the bells! And his merry ***** swells With the paean of the bells! And he dances, and he yells; Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the paean of the bells— Of the bells: Keeping time, time, time, In a sort of Runic rhyme, To the throbbing of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells— To the sobbing of the bells; Keeping time, time, time, As he knells, knells, knells, In a happy Runic rhyme, To the rolling of the bells— Of the bells, bells, bells— To the tolling of the bells, Of the bells, bells, bells, bells, Bells, bells, bells— To the moaning and the groaning of the bells.
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117
Teresa climbs on the bus before the sun, if she has the fare to get there, where she makes the bread; she's been at this two of her nineteen years   yet she has fears, they will come for her--green card or not; though they like her rolls she kneads the big ***** pulls, pinches, a sculpting of dough, a laying of trays, one after another then, from the Iglesias, they come, decked in their finery though she does not see she only hears the litany of language she can't comprehend, a clanging of trays, laughter the urging of the jefe to work faster, bake the bread; the communion wafers did not fill them now they are here, breaking fast, forgetting the words they just heard the songs they sang Teresa does not complain; she is glad to feed the worshipers, though they will never know her name nor will they stop for her in the pouring rain, the blistering sun Teresa never wavers next Sabbath will be the same: dawn, the dough, the oven it is the work--her hands which make the bread others break, the grace granted to serve holy, holy, holy...
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Apr 2, 2017
Apr 2, 2017 at 8:49 PM UTC
feeding the holier
Mom said it's not a jungle gym, It's not a jungle gym. It's not a jungle gym. It's not a jungle gym. But it was a GIANT ELEPHANT! And chains are for clanging And metal is for banging And roped off areas are for sneaking Under It’s not a jungle gym It’s not a jungle gym It’s not a jungle gym I didn’t understand why mom wasn’t excited She just stood next to me staring up at the Elephant It’s not a jungle gym I let go of her hand It’s not a jungle gym I ducked under the rope, It's not a jungle gym I almost didn’t need to duck Then I touched the metal elephant, To test if he was real.
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Sep 22, 2016
Sep 22, 2016 at 11:04 AM UTC
Don't Cage the Elephant
Wrenches clanging, knuckles banging A drop of blood A  new part here, and old part… there A hotrod had been built! A patchwork, mechanical, quilt I drove past the banner that said “Welcome Race Fans” Took a new route, behind the grandstands And through my chipped window, I thought I could see Some of the racers were laughing at me I guess chalky grey primer is not to their taste But I put my bucks mister in the right place I chugged-popped past cars that dealers had sold Swung into a spot, next to something old Emerging with interest from under his hood My neighbor said two words, he said “sounds good” The voice on the loudspeaker tells us we’re up Pre-staged, staged, then given the green The line becomes blurred between man and machine Bones become linkage Muscle, spring Fear, excitement Time distorts …. Color disappears … Vision narrows… Noise ---  becomes music Speed --- satisfaction
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May 1, 2017
May 1, 2017 at 11:36 AM UTC
Race Day
**** why did you come to this dance with a mask on? Why not the tin man and his rainbow girl? Why not Racine, his hair marcelled down to his chest? Why not come as a stomach digesting its worms? Why you little fellow with your ears at attention and your nose poking up like a microphone? You whig emblem, you woman chaser, who do you dance over the wide lawn tonight clanging the garbage pail like great silver bells?
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4.7k
Raccoon
Depersonalization Derealization Dissociation Delusional Hallucinations Confabulation Perseveration persevered. Clanging Rhyming Echolalia echolalia. Paranoia Ideas of reference Thought blocking Internal stimuli Thought broadcasting heard every way every day. Mental disorders or poets extraordinary The Paiute anthropologist locked up on the inpatient unit with visions of the ancestors dancing in his eyes said "See these folks you have locked up, In ancient days from the desert hills they came our way delivered truths in their special way. "Once they had their say On desert winds they blew back up to their hills away straight away. " "Can you please give me the keys. I've said what I had to say. "
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Apr 11, 2015
Apr 11, 2015 at 10:04 AM UTC
Keeping One's Distance/ The Poetry of Madness
When my father was young he mowed lawns for money. He pushed a second-hand spinning blade in the hot Florida sun for spare change. With dull coins clanging in his pocket and crumpled bills in his palm, my father fought to escape home. To him, home was synonymous with scary southern suburbia, where late-night television  was replaced with screaming matches and loud fists. Angry eyes with children's cries. Barbecues bombarded with apologetic looks from neighbors. Pretending not to hear shatters and shouts of supposed 'baseball black eyes'. And so he pushed. Pushed the rusty lawn mower down strangers' yards, pushed away the sniggering snot-nosed kids calling him 'Spic', and pushed at his father's demons, crawling down his spine, whispering that he was no good. Years later he kept pushing Pushing Pushing Pushing towards whatever came next. Yet no matter how much he pushed, he was still the same boy with the lawn mower. Angry, mad, pushing violently ahead. The smoke of sanity is inhaled now, as my father's blood-shot eyes try to suppress the angry boy within. The residue of stolen innocence is not left unnoticed. A touch of tone on his once sunburnt neck and the man he has made instantly flushes away, leaving his father's demons. Calmer than before, a dying star, burning bright before collapse. Like a strong jaw, his father's anger is passed down to him, and I, his son, am now born with this seed of destruction. Smaller than before, but still seething. Constantly reminded, I sit in a leather chair surrounded by white walls in carefully controlled climate, plastic pen perched on my palm, I push. I'll keep pushing.
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Jun 9, 2014
Jun 9, 2014 at 4:50 PM UTC
Lawn mower Pen
When my father was young he mowed lawns for money. He pushed a second-hand spinning blade in the hot Florida sun for spare change. With dull coins clanging in his pocket and crumpled bills in his palm, my father fought to escape home. To him, home was synonymous with scary southern suburbia, where late-night television  was replaced with screaming matches and loud fists. Angry eyes with children's cries. Barbecues bombarded with apologetic looks from neighbors. Pretending not to hear shatters and shouts of supposed 'baseball black eyes'. And so he pushed. Pushed the rusty lawn mower down strangers' yards, pushed away the sniggering snot-nosed kids calling him 'Spic', and pushed at his father's demons, crawling down his spine, whispering that he was no good. Years later he kept pushing Pushing Pushing Pushing towards whatever came next. Yet no matter how much he pushed, he was still the same boy with the lawn mower. Angry, mad, pushing violently ahead. The smoke of sanity is inhaled now, as my father's blood-shot eyes try to suppress the angry boy within. The residue of stolen innocence is not left unnoticed. A touch of tone on his once sunburnt neck and the man he has made instantly flushes away, leaving his father's demons. Calmer than before, a dying star, burning bright before collapse. Like a strong jaw, his father's anger is passed down to him, and I, his son, am now born with this seed of destruction. Smaller than before, but still seething. Constantly reminded, I sit in a leather chair surrounded by white walls in carefully controlled climate, plastic pen perched on my palm, I push. I'll keep pushing.
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12
# From an ornate podium the orator spoke words-- ..extraordinarily elaborate ones.. as if, as if But those who know.. we who have  laid low, down in to the trenches as grunts, both  outside and inside       of the wire.. Those who have  quietly done their legwork.. who have accepted their difficult fate  as that   borne  of and in to,  a training..  an equipping; lay low, lay low .   .   .   .   The throngs at the foot of the podium-- mesmerized by their own  need to be mesmerized,  never even    noticed the children who  in their innocence,  peered out from under the crowd's legs to better see the 'magnificent' podium.. The oldest of which, ran back to trenches trying to describe what they saw. Two of the quiet, unassuming-ones made their way back to the podium,   and in blocking out the orator's voice, (which  to the  knowing, was  as that of a clanging bell..) Now observed up close, the inner-workings of the elaborate podium and sat in  wonder of its expenditures-- wrapped around such  slipshod,   weak and hastily assembled framework.. And in having become interested in the structure's groundedness to what one would hope would be  a solid-built foundation, placed onto solid, earthen ground They instead gasped as they saw its legs floating upon nothing.. *"What the **** is holding this thing up..?"* War-trained and battle-hardened, they remembered their superiors speaking in hushed tones that even ****** with all of his blowhard oratorical ********   at least had a semblance of the podium's fastenings.. Albeit, partially assembled by our own country's stupidity within certain provisions brought forth in the Treaty of Versailles,    but this    but this; This oratorical misleading of the broken-ones this empty illusion of a presentation,  borne not  from a suffering  leading to true regeneration but instead, a distractive short-cut into the Realms;    This counterfeit substance.. as if borne in power,    as if..  as if.     .. But the realms.. they know It is only those down here on earth,  spirit cloaked within the deceptive misgivings of the flesh-- so aching to establish itself apart  from the necessary legwork needed to humbly become a part of Stream's flow: (borne,  solely from the inner Wellspring--  deep within the bowels of Love's True Ache).. It is here.. on earth..  that you will find the reward you seek..  oh wondrous orator, oh magnificent 'smither' of fine words..    **Your podium, a whitewashed soapbox    floating upon nothing..** --And therefore meaning   nothing within the Substance-Based parameters       of the Realms. #
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Mar 22, 2021
Mar 22, 2021 at 3:48 PM UTC
on love, legwork.. and the humility that leads to getting well..
# From an ornate podium the orator spoke words-- ..extraordinarily elaborate ones.. as if, as if But those who know.. we who have  laid low, down in to the trenches as grunts, both  outside and inside       of the wire.. Those who have  quietly done their legwork.. who have accepted their difficult fate  as that   borne  of and in to,  a training..  an equipping; lay low, lay low .   .   .   .   The throngs at the foot of the podium-- mesmerized by their own  need to be mesmerized,  never even    noticed the children who  in their innocence,  peered out from under the crowd's legs to better see the 'magnificent' podium.. The oldest of which, ran back to trenches trying to describe what they saw. Two of the quiet, unassuming-ones made their way back to the podium,   and in blocking out the orator's voice, (which  to the  knowing, was  as that of a clanging bell..) Now observed up close, the inner-workings of the elaborate podium and sat in  wonder of its expenditures-- wrapped around such  slipshod,   weak and hastily assembled framework.. And in having become interested in the structure's groundedness to what one would hope would be  a solid-built foundation, placed onto solid, earthen ground They instead gasped as they saw its legs floating upon nothing.. *"What the **** is holding this thing up..?"* War-trained and battle-hardened, they remembered their superiors speaking in hushed tones that even ****** with all of his blowhard oratorical ********   at least had a semblance of the podium's fastenings.. Albeit, partially assembled by our own country's stupidity within certain provisions brought forth in the Treaty of Versailles,    but this    but this; This oratorical misleading of the broken-ones this empty illusion of a presentation,  borne not  from a suffering  leading to true regeneration but instead, a distractive short-cut into the Realms;    This counterfeit substance.. as if borne in power,    as if..  as if.     .. But the realms.. they know It is only those down here on earth,  spirit cloaked within the deceptive misgivings of the flesh-- so aching to establish itself apart  from the necessary legwork needed to humbly become a part of Stream's flow: (borne,  solely from the inner Wellspring--  deep within the bowels of Love's True Ache).. It is here.. on earth..  that you will find the reward you seek..  oh wondrous orator, oh magnificent 'smither' of fine words..    **Your podium, a whitewashed soapbox    floating upon nothing..** --And therefore meaning   nothing within the Substance-Based parameters       of the Realms. #
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80
There is a Mouse in this House. Insatiable, He keeps me up at night, thin fine claws on metal stove tops, whispering to the birds what a fool he's made of me, because I couldn't make the fibers of my home work with me. There is a Mouse in this House, Immortal, I've fished him drowned out of drains, fed him bleach on silver trays, listened to him choke in air vents, his chestnut jacket perpetually in the corners of my eye, leaving reminders in my cereal, this rodent he refuses to die. There is a Mouse in this House, Intangible, he is not slipping through my fingers he's dancing on them, quick petite feet tapping on my counters, fleet and fast like smoke, I've seen him seep through a clenched fist and still escape with wedding bands, There is a Mouse in this House. Impish, he waits 'till I'm alone to play his music, the crack and chew, too early with the morning dew, he will not play his song for you, it'd be too easy to be seen. There is a Mouse in this House, primeval, he's been waiting, mapped the walls and painted my flaws, tactician skilled and iron willed, this beast knows war far more than my militia mind was ready for, plotting out insurgencies for restless and anxieties, There is a Mouse in this House, emaciated, what's his is his, what's mine is his, there is no sacred to things with tails. clearing out my pantry, his jaws now tasting for my sanity, finished with the: Rye, White, and Sourdough, he's fixed his tongue on sweat breads, scuttling with unnatural flow, There is a Mouse in this House. Charming, too handsome a creature to ever be singed, he peddles on the burners simply too strut, scampering through flames to test his luck, There is a Mouse in this House, Insomniac, from now until each evening hour, his paws touch turns time sour. Ivory teeth clanging out a new ink-printed deed, he owns the tenant and never even had to rent it, There is a Mouse in this House, arrogant, too self-assured and clever, cunning, devilish a creature he may be, but he has yet to get a load of me, holed away within his den, his first mistake was not letting me win, setting aria's on fly's wings to declare his victory, this furry phantasm is all too aware of what he did to me. There is a Mouse in This House, sleeper, I'm plotting my comeback, sure-footed, slow breathes, and savage hands, I'm ready, silent and steady; this beautiful monstrous mouse had best prepare for battle. There is a Mouse in this House. But it's my House.
0
Oct 27, 2014
Oct 27, 2014 at 3:10 PM UTC
There is a Mouse in This House
There is a Mouse in this House. Insatiable, He keeps me up at night, thin fine claws on metal stove tops, whispering to the birds what a fool he's made of me, because I couldn't make the fibers of my home work with me. There is a Mouse in this House, Immortal, I've fished him drowned out of drains, fed him bleach on silver trays, listened to him choke in air vents, his chestnut jacket perpetually in the corners of my eye, leaving reminders in my cereal, this rodent he refuses to die. There is a Mouse in this House, Intangible, he is not slipping through my fingers he's dancing on them, quick petite feet tapping on my counters, fleet and fast like smoke, I've seen him seep through a clenched fist and still escape with wedding bands, There is a Mouse in this House. Impish, he waits 'till I'm alone to play his music, the crack and chew, too early with the morning dew, he will not play his song for you, it'd be too easy to be seen. There is a Mouse in this House, primeval, he's been waiting, mapped the walls and painted my flaws, tactician skilled and iron willed, this beast knows war far more than my militia mind was ready for, plotting out insurgencies for restless and anxieties, There is a Mouse in this House, emaciated, what's his is his, what's mine is his, there is no sacred to things with tails. clearing out my pantry, his jaws now tasting for my sanity, finished with the: Rye, White, and Sourdough, he's fixed his tongue on sweat breads, scuttling with unnatural flow, There is a Mouse in this House. Charming, too handsome a creature to ever be singed, he peddles on the burners simply too strut, scampering through flames to test his luck, There is a Mouse in this House, Insomniac, from now until each evening hour, his paws touch turns time sour. Ivory teeth clanging out a new ink-printed deed, he owns the tenant and never even had to rent it, There is a Mouse in this House, arrogant, too self-assured and clever, cunning, devilish a creature he may be, but he has yet to get a load of me, holed away within his den, his first mistake was not letting me win, setting aria's on fly's wings to declare his victory, this furry phantasm is all too aware of what he did to me. There is a Mouse in This House, sleeper, I'm plotting my comeback, sure-footed, slow breathes, and savage hands, I'm ready, silent and steady; this beautiful monstrous mouse had best prepare for battle. There is a Mouse in this House. But it's my House.
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77
We will never walk again As we used to walk at night, Watching our shadows lengthen Under the gold street-light When the snow was new and white. We will never walk again Slowly, we two, In spring when the park is sweet With midnight and with dew, And the passers-by are few. I sit and think of it all, And the blue June twilight dies, — Down in the clanging square A street-piano cries And stars come out in the skies.
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3.6k
Nightfall
Flavored hukkas are passed around, Alcohol and paan bring the mehfil alive, The Ustad ji sits down and flexes his fingers, He knows he’ll be working all night. Dha dhin dhin dha, dha dhin dhin dha Na tin tin ta Ta dhin dhin dha, Move the Ustad ji’s fingers on the tabla. While with a veil on her face, And feet dipped in and henna-colored, Lips in cheap red lipstick covered, She unfalteringly, gracefully enters. Her steps are matched by the chhan chhan of the ghungroos tied around her ankles so slender. Eyes set on her, feast on her youth, Just right for the taste of all her customers. Bejeweled hands placed on waist, She stands at the centre of attention, She lifts a foot, readies to dance, And begins the nightly convention. Skillfully, perfectly, sensuously move Feet well-trained since childhood days, Harmonizing with the timbre That the Ustad ji creates. Tin tin na dhin na dhin na On the tabla, experienced fingers beat. Chhan chhan chhan chhan, She dances, repeating the rhythm with her feet. Metal bells strike against one another And chhan chhan chhan-a chhan she goes, Making breaths prance and jump, As she strikes on the ground her heels and toes. Then suddenly she stops and gasps, Over disgruntled, impatient groans she tries to hear the sound that flows in, only to her ears. Several rooms away, a baby cries. Naach! A voice booms, Arey naach! More join in. A glass of wine is shattered by an irritated one. But she stands still, clutching her chest, frozen. One sways up to where she stands, For the veil covering her face, his hands dive. He uncovers her, but is blinded by the sight of her beauty And her tears that fill her kajal-smeared eyes. She’s shaken back to reality as she looks all around. Her sparkling pall is off her face. She sees all those drunk men who’ve paid to watch her dance. She knows she has to make the sound of the cries fade away. So she stomps her feet on the ground till it hurts. Hair flying out of braid, bangles clanging, Anguish replaces her innocent loveliness, The music in the air is now shrill,  jarring. Her steps match with the tabla’s rhythm no more. But she dances, planting her feet so hard they weep. She silences every sound with the noise of her ghungroos, Praying that the night will lull her wailing son to sleep.
0
Jun 22, 2012
Jun 22, 2012 at 1:11 PM UTC
The Noise of Music
Flavored hukkas are passed around, Alcohol and paan bring the mehfil alive, The Ustad ji sits down and flexes his fingers, He knows he’ll be working all night. Dha dhin dhin dha, dha dhin dhin dha Na tin tin ta Ta dhin dhin dha, Move the Ustad ji’s fingers on the tabla. While with a veil on her face, And feet dipped in and henna-colored, Lips in cheap red lipstick covered, She unfalteringly, gracefully enters. Her steps are matched by the chhan chhan of the ghungroos tied around her ankles so slender. Eyes set on her, feast on her youth, Just right for the taste of all her customers. Bejeweled hands placed on waist, She stands at the centre of attention, She lifts a foot, readies to dance, And begins the nightly convention. Skillfully, perfectly, sensuously move Feet well-trained since childhood days, Harmonizing with the timbre That the Ustad ji creates. Tin tin na dhin na dhin na On the tabla, experienced fingers beat. Chhan chhan chhan chhan, She dances, repeating the rhythm with her feet. Metal bells strike against one another And chhan chhan chhan-a chhan she goes, Making breaths prance and jump, As she strikes on the ground her heels and toes. Then suddenly she stops and gasps, Over disgruntled, impatient groans she tries to hear the sound that flows in, only to her ears. Several rooms away, a baby cries. Naach! A voice booms, Arey naach! More join in. A glass of wine is shattered by an irritated one. But she stands still, clutching her chest, frozen. One sways up to where she stands, For the veil covering her face, his hands dive. He uncovers her, but is blinded by the sight of her beauty And her tears that fill her kajal-smeared eyes. She’s shaken back to reality as she looks all around. Her sparkling pall is off her face. She sees all those drunk men who’ve paid to watch her dance. She knows she has to make the sound of the cries fade away. So she stomps her feet on the ground till it hurts. Hair flying out of braid, bangles clanging, Anguish replaces her innocent loveliness, The music in the air is now shrill,  jarring. Her steps match with the tabla’s rhythm no more. But she dances, planting her feet so hard they weep. She silences every sound with the noise of her ghungroos, Praying that the night will lull her wailing son to sleep.
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56
A sudden evening rain over the rice fields,       memories wake up from deep sleep of long years, take a walk once again   along the narrow ridge parting green fields on a rain soaked evening of yore. She, a jaunty young woman had changed       the quiet world of a village boy with big curious eyes, just in few minutes. his innocence, vanished a yearning    for something unknown until then,            started its torment       love, dabbed its fragrance on his being with its slight of hand, a spell cast over him made his head spin like he drank heady wine, how strange! Under her spread umbrella he came by chance, only once in his life walked with her till the door on his way to the temple of Krishna      for the evening worship, walking along the zig zag, slippery path had he slipped a bath in slush was assured. When the rains came unannounced, rushing ,with her anklets clanging frogs spiritedly croaking,   all this mingling with the  orchestra of myriad insects, she came as if from nowhere, from a wild growth of banana plants on one side, down to his path. She smiled at him as if she knew him well a lush young woman, who took him by his hand, brought him closer to the protective wrap of her sari, that smelled lemons and oranges, that fragrance remains sweet in memory, was it jasmine scent from her long black tresses, that made him feel that the world has  suddenly become, a place, full of luminance, has he quickly grown up to her age? She didn't ask him questions, called his pet name surprising him about that knowledge of her; that made him think that she was someone so close once, but forgot as he grew up. Reaching in front of the temple, she gave just a wistful look, and vanished from his life for ever. Not even aware that she just gave, the best fragrant moments for a boy on the first step to adulthood, he stood looking her go on her way. When he look back and remember, this delusion, he realizes,  stays with him: "I am under your umbrella  ever since"
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Oct 1, 2013
Oct 1, 2013 at 1:33 PM UTC
Under the umbrella of her love just once
A sudden evening rain over the rice fields,       memories wake up from deep sleep of long years, take a walk once again   along the narrow ridge parting green fields on a rain soaked evening of yore. She, a jaunty young woman had changed       the quiet world of a village boy with big curious eyes, just in few minutes. his innocence, vanished a yearning    for something unknown until then,            started its torment       love, dabbed its fragrance on his being with its slight of hand, a spell cast over him made his head spin like he drank heady wine, how strange! Under her spread umbrella he came by chance, only once in his life walked with her till the door on his way to the temple of Krishna      for the evening worship, walking along the zig zag, slippery path had he slipped a bath in slush was assured. When the rains came unannounced, rushing ,with her anklets clanging frogs spiritedly croaking,   all this mingling with the  orchestra of myriad insects, she came as if from nowhere, from a wild growth of banana plants on one side, down to his path. She smiled at him as if she knew him well a lush young woman, who took him by his hand, brought him closer to the protective wrap of her sari, that smelled lemons and oranges, that fragrance remains sweet in memory, was it jasmine scent from her long black tresses, that made him feel that the world has  suddenly become, a place, full of luminance, has he quickly grown up to her age? She didn't ask him questions, called his pet name surprising him about that knowledge of her; that made him think that she was someone so close once, but forgot as he grew up. Reaching in front of the temple, she gave just a wistful look, and vanished from his life for ever. Not even aware that she just gave, the best fragrant moments for a boy on the first step to adulthood, he stood looking her go on her way. When he look back and remember, this delusion, he realizes,  stays with him: "I am under your umbrella  ever since"
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55
Phases of faces, captured moments and instances I pass by, so swiftly, so fleetingly Caught in the crossroads of paradigms and decisions I stood paralyzed, terrified. I meet intense eyes that bore through me, knowing me, knowing us A smile as warm as the sun that has the power to melt me Your presence is strong, comforting…strong, unsettling…strong, terrifying You have me without even trying, you mesmerize me. You bring me to my knees with a sigh, you can crush me with a word. You can bring me to bliss with a touch, you can bring me to ecstasy with a kiss. You command me with a whisper, I am drawn to you You break down my china walls, one by one You undress my layers of failed expectations Of shattered dreams, and broken hearts I stand before you, naked, vulnerable I look away, not bearing for you to see My helplessness, my hopelessness All my imperfections, my fears, my desires. You wipe my tears away, and kiss my bitterness away And yet the fear descends on me…I’ve been here before Fear of hurt, of betrayal, of disappointment Fear that this is all an illusion…or perhaps just my delusion And so I put on a smile, cool and composed Hide behind my fast-paced life, run far away from you Going so fast, so fast…so I won’t think, I won’t feel Until I fall, exhausted, to sleep a dreamless sleep I need the noise, the meaningless clanging For in silence, the longing creeps in… To be in your arms, just us and nothing else… Nothing but warmth and the sound of our hearts beating. So I welcome the numbness, welcome the pain Punish myself for the choice I’ve made in my weakness Someday I will find my happiness, someday I will find my strength Somehow…I will find you again.
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May 28, 2013
May 28, 2013 at 1:32 PM UTC
Someday
Phases of faces, captured moments and instances I pass by, so swiftly, so fleetingly Caught in the crossroads of paradigms and decisions I stood paralyzed, terrified. I meet intense eyes that bore through me, knowing me, knowing us A smile as warm as the sun that has the power to melt me Your presence is strong, comforting…strong, unsettling…strong, terrifying You have me without even trying, you mesmerize me. You bring me to my knees with a sigh, you can crush me with a word. You can bring me to bliss with a touch, you can bring me to ecstasy with a kiss. You command me with a whisper, I am drawn to you You break down my china walls, one by one You undress my layers of failed expectations Of shattered dreams, and broken hearts I stand before you, naked, vulnerable I look away, not bearing for you to see My helplessness, my hopelessness All my imperfections, my fears, my desires. You wipe my tears away, and kiss my bitterness away And yet the fear descends on me…I’ve been here before Fear of hurt, of betrayal, of disappointment Fear that this is all an illusion…or perhaps just my delusion And so I put on a smile, cool and composed Hide behind my fast-paced life, run far away from you Going so fast, so fast…so I won’t think, I won’t feel Until I fall, exhausted, to sleep a dreamless sleep I need the noise, the meaningless clanging For in silence, the longing creeps in… To be in your arms, just us and nothing else… Nothing but warmth and the sound of our hearts beating. So I welcome the numbness, welcome the pain Punish myself for the choice I’ve made in my weakness Someday I will find my happiness, someday I will find my strength Somehow…I will find you again.
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36
Beauty out in the open, light falls on linoleum tiles like heel-worn stones Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Clotted with conversation, upperclassmen stroll like the elderly Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes - but I know it was I who brought the downpour The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes – but I know it was I who brought the downpour They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Ignorance is bliss, they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Look down, one foot – and then the other! Ignorance is bliss they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. Anger and sadness, guilt and fear turn like Viewmaster slides lit up by the sun Or am I on my own here? Each boy's path runs along each other like long-exposure stars, leaving streaks between the darkness.
0
Jun 26, 2010
Jun 26, 2010 at 10:48 PM UTC
Repercussions.
Beauty out in the open, light falls on linoleum tiles like heel-worn stones Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Clotted with conversation, upperclassmen stroll like the elderly Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes - but I know it was I who brought the downpour The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes – but I know it was I who brought the downpour They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Ignorance is bliss, they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Look down, one foot – and then the other! Ignorance is bliss they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. Anger and sadness, guilt and fear turn like Viewmaster slides lit up by the sun Or am I on my own here? Each boy's path runs along each other like long-exposure stars, leaving streaks between the darkness.
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29
People who are afraid of themselves Multiply themselves into families And so divide themselves And so become less afraid. People who might have to go out Into clanging strangers' laughter, Crowd under roofs, make compacts To no more than smile at each other. People who might meet their own faces Or surprise their own voices in doorways Build themselves rooms without mirrors And live between walls without echoes. People who might meet other faces And unknown voices round corners Build themselves rooms all mirrors And live between walls all echoes. People who are afraid to go naked Clothe themselves in families, houses, But are still afraid of death Because death one day will undress them.
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3.2k
Houses
No sickle bar churns repetitiously clanging two notes while grasshoppers and field mice scurry to survive the blade Now yellow bulldozers with humongous tires roar like thunder in a rainstorm and scrape away black loam leaving clay as red as fresh beets There is no funeral for the hay meadow that is dead and put to rest without a tombstone
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May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 9:24 AM UTC
No Need to Mow this Spring
I hear an army charging upon the land, And the thunder of horses plunging, foam about their knees: Arrogant, in black armour, behind them stand, Disdaining the reins, with fluttering whips, the charioteers. They cry unto the night their battle-name: I moan in sleep when I hear afar their whirling laughter. They cleave the gloom of dreams, a blinding flame, Clanging, clanging upon the heart as upon an anvil. They come shaking in triumph their long, green hair: They come out of the sea and run shouting by the shore. My heart, have you no wisdom thus to despair? My love, my love, my love, why have you left me alone?
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3k
I Hear an Army Charging Upon the Land
A drugstore pallid in waning light, always illuminated in halogen halos. I am earless with music. Black metal loud in clanging sets and blows- foreshadowing the smell of cleaning solution, air freshener and the outside sweet at my back all steeped deep in the rip roaring undertone torrent of cigarette smoke blended with cheap perfume until I cannot tell the difference. There is a limp familiarity to the underlying odor born partially of personal encounter and- nestled in the hive mind of social experience. A distillation of regret and remorse, of lonely, of irrelevance; this black hole swallows my voice the way of my ears, eaten by rust. Four cans of beans, kidneys, in cans squeezed without any power against sagging swells melting into other curves and I swerve close and around guiltily, noting you only as the source of this pungent spring. You are smiling apologies ignorant of my apparent inhumanity- blind to my selfish hands.. Pinioning belly flesh, flattening, reaching and gaining attendance from a better man retrieving every dropped can. I’m retreating, shaken, tense to alternatively slacken. My sweat slippery palms with whitened red sharp fingers feel foreign and I am surrounded by razors then shaving cream, moving from shampoo to conditioner, the whole store is infected with smell. Staring at nail clippers/snipers clipping touch smooth sooth my tense mind- don’t look **don’t look** I can sense little else but dread drawing closer you are now crouched so close I’m gagging, taken forcefully-swept away in an olfactory flood roiling in rot, currents of solitude exude from your smiling sullen appearance when I turn to you fumbling with my electric ears, surfacing in a breath of Amish silence broken with simple request and I want to scream at you that I am not a man to ask opinions of that it does not matter what fake nails she glues to her body that she is excluded and I don’t know why. I choose swirls of cream suspended within watery milk, over childish lady bugs framed by yellow or dots of red alternating to black, an epitaph to a lifelike effigy.
0
Dec 10, 2010
Dec 10, 2010 at 1:42 AM UTC
The Inevitability of Human Incongruity.
A drugstore pallid in waning light, always illuminated in halogen halos. I am earless with music. Black metal loud in clanging sets and blows- foreshadowing the smell of cleaning solution, air freshener and the outside sweet at my back all steeped deep in the rip roaring undertone torrent of cigarette smoke blended with cheap perfume until I cannot tell the difference. There is a limp familiarity to the underlying odor born partially of personal encounter and- nestled in the hive mind of social experience. A distillation of regret and remorse, of lonely, of irrelevance; this black hole swallows my voice the way of my ears, eaten by rust. Four cans of beans, kidneys, in cans squeezed without any power against sagging swells melting into other curves and I swerve close and around guiltily, noting you only as the source of this pungent spring. You are smiling apologies ignorant of my apparent inhumanity- blind to my selfish hands.. Pinioning belly flesh, flattening, reaching and gaining attendance from a better man retrieving every dropped can. I’m retreating, shaken, tense to alternatively slacken. My sweat slippery palms with whitened red sharp fingers feel foreign and I am surrounded by razors then shaving cream, moving from shampoo to conditioner, the whole store is infected with smell. Staring at nail clippers/snipers clipping touch smooth sooth my tense mind- don’t look **don’t look** I can sense little else but dread drawing closer you are now crouched so close I’m gagging, taken forcefully-swept away in an olfactory flood roiling in rot, currents of solitude exude from your smiling sullen appearance when I turn to you fumbling with my electric ears, surfacing in a breath of Amish silence broken with simple request and I want to scream at you that I am not a man to ask opinions of that it does not matter what fake nails she glues to her body that she is excluded and I don’t know why. I choose swirls of cream suspended within watery milk, over childish lady bugs framed by yellow or dots of red alternating to black, an epitaph to a lifelike effigy.
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59
stop! I said to this clanging mind go! I said to my hedonist heart neither of the two deserves my body.
0
Aug 13, 2025
Aug 13, 2025 at 12:02 AM UTC
[🚦]
THE noon was as a crystal bowl The red wine mantled through; Around it like a Viking's beard The red-gold hazes blew, As tho' he quaffed the ruddy draught While swift his galley flew. This mighty Viking was the Night; He sailed about the earth, And called the merry harvest-time To sing him songs of mirth; And all on earth or in the sea To melody gave birth. The valleys of the earth were full To rocky lip and brim With golden grain that shone and sang When woods were still and dim, A little song from sheaf to sheaf- Sweet Plenty's cradle-hymn. O gallant were the high tree-tops, And gay the strain they sang! And cheerfully the moon-lit hills Their echo-music rang! And what so proud and what so loud As was the ocean's clang! But O the little humming song That sang among the sheaves! 'Twas grander than the airy march That rattled thro' the leaves, And prouder, louder, than the deep, Bold clanging of the waves: 'The lives of men, the lives of men With every sheaf are bound! We are the blessing which annuls The curse upon the ground! And he who reaps the Golden Grain The Golden Love hath found.'
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2.9k
A Harvest Song
i. In the shower under cold water, I scrubbed and scrubbed I wanted to rid myself of my own skin Escape into a mine so I could live among the coal A fuel almost as ***** as I felt. ii. As he pulled away from me As he broke me into pieces Shattered glass lay upon the seat of his car I know what it's like to escape into a stranger's hot breath The weight of a warm wash cloth upon my back Pressing down again. iii. I prayed my wings would grow back in time For me to fly to places I could never see Before, my vision was black in white Suddenly, I could see in color His memory continues to pluck the feathers But once again, I see the value of bone. iv. I tried to move on Forget the thrashing of your memory Like a gong, clanging symbol Leave my mind alone Leave me be v. Free me of broken pieces of the years I lost Minutes, I lost bleeding from the inside out, razor eloquently in hand Hours, I lost to purging myself of your uncleanliness Days, I lost dredging my soul in therapy, hoping to dig up something that would do me some good Years, I lost to the talons of PTSD Depression Anxiety. vi. Finally, some hope I taste it on my tongue like raindrops after the drought Sunlight after the storm I find myself And lose the taint of you, heavy laden upon my skin You are a cavity Filled by love and support. And finally, there's beauty in the struggle It's anything but brief Because the fight goes on Forever.
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Apr 22, 2015
Apr 22, 2015 at 2:59 PM UTC
A Response to Ocean Vuong's "On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous"
Laying flat on the shadowed ground Of the meadow that holds my sanity,  I stare up into the glistening moon As it glances upon the wet tree tops. The grass scraping the back of my neck  Begins to freeze to that of an iceberg  With the cool crisp wind  With the shivering leaves. My mind begins to wonder from my surroundings To what clenches my heart at night,  To the devils that tore me down, To the angels that tried hard to fix me. My thoughts numb as if from the temperature, Sending tingles up my spine And horror into my mind As all feeling ceases to exist.  A rapid breath escapes my chapped lips. A rapid breath like the harsh wind Now whipping through the lonely willow, The one weeping loudly by my side. The sky turns into a black mess, Flipping from its once clear blue state. Blinding lines fill the sky, Imitating the roots of a flower. But it is not a delicate flower. It is destruction As it hits the shaking tree, Forcing it to crash onto the once sunny meadow. It hits the dancing grass With a bang and a thud, But not before the scream, My scream, escapes from my throat. I do not fear for my life here; I fear for the willow. The willow that is so much like my beaten heart, The willow that I care about more then the voices  In the forest behind me that command me to run. Getting on my knees, I crawl across the mud Until I reach the dying willow That rests surrounded by clanging lights. Stroking the trunk of the tree,  I let out a sob that catches in my tight throat. The willow's brittle bark crumbles as I touch it, Leaving a brown dust on the tips of my fingers. With blurred sight, I search the tree. I search it for any sign of life. One lone catkin hangs from the side of a branch; I reach for it with my stained hand. Delicately, I wind my fingers around the dry flower. Smiling down at the last thing to bloom from the ****** willow, I pluck it from the branch and stare at the storm above my head. I start to wonder what the thundering storm meant. Tightening my sweaty palm, I crush the catkin. I crush it with resent and a need for revenge. Revenge for my ****** willow; The one that will never return to health.
0
Oct 23, 2013
Oct 23, 2013 at 1:36 PM UTC
The Willow
Laying flat on the shadowed ground Of the meadow that holds my sanity,  I stare up into the glistening moon As it glances upon the wet tree tops. The grass scraping the back of my neck  Begins to freeze to that of an iceberg  With the cool crisp wind  With the shivering leaves. My mind begins to wonder from my surroundings To what clenches my heart at night,  To the devils that tore me down, To the angels that tried hard to fix me. My thoughts numb as if from the temperature, Sending tingles up my spine And horror into my mind As all feeling ceases to exist.  A rapid breath escapes my chapped lips. A rapid breath like the harsh wind Now whipping through the lonely willow, The one weeping loudly by my side. The sky turns into a black mess, Flipping from its once clear blue state. Blinding lines fill the sky, Imitating the roots of a flower. But it is not a delicate flower. It is destruction As it hits the shaking tree, Forcing it to crash onto the once sunny meadow. It hits the dancing grass With a bang and a thud, But not before the scream, My scream, escapes from my throat. I do not fear for my life here; I fear for the willow. The willow that is so much like my beaten heart, The willow that I care about more then the voices  In the forest behind me that command me to run. Getting on my knees, I crawl across the mud Until I reach the dying willow That rests surrounded by clanging lights. Stroking the trunk of the tree,  I let out a sob that catches in my tight throat. The willow's brittle bark crumbles as I touch it, Leaving a brown dust on the tips of my fingers. With blurred sight, I search the tree. I search it for any sign of life. One lone catkin hangs from the side of a branch; I reach for it with my stained hand. Delicately, I wind my fingers around the dry flower. Smiling down at the last thing to bloom from the ****** willow, I pluck it from the branch and stare at the storm above my head. I start to wonder what the thundering storm meant. Tightening my sweaty palm, I crush the catkin. I crush it with resent and a need for revenge. Revenge for my ****** willow; The one that will never return to health.
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56
Resting is never easy, with the stirring of empty thoughts, like clanging little bells and spilling mold from teapots. I sit and drink of folly and greet my guests there, for I’ll never get to resting if I don’t have my fair share. Though the poison may eat me up, I tie wonderland’s ribbon round my neck, and jump the spout into the drink to take my given due. Again I kiss the teacup’s lip and mumble “I love you."
0
Nov 17, 2014
Nov 17, 2014 at 4:54 AM UTC
Midnight Tea
I can still remember. That burning feeling of inspiration, bubbling up through my body. It dominated me, defined me, led me to believe that I was my own hero. A protagonist on a quest, a road to travel on, certainty in my bones. Driven by love through the narration of my world, my story. Words overflowed from my heart. Staining the tracks, pages, and lilies of my life with my fire. Every heartbeat resounded like the clanging of a tower's bells. Each ring dictating time, order, purpose, place. I can still remember. The lingering taste of coffee on my tongue, my face sore from smiling. Hours spent talking and listening. The content of my life summarized like chapters of a book. The way my heart vaulted when your eyes met mine. It was like the moon pulling at the tides. Giving the waves motion and momentum. So I spilled my ink and blood, writing you into the story. I can still remember. What it was like when it was over. I hadn't realized I had been living in a cell. Scrawling my visions of the world onto every inch of those four walls. Diagrams and diatribes, the things I considered to be myself. Going mad in the most wonderful fashion. As I left I saw them for what they were. Mosaics and memorials. Poison and poetry. The passionate magic of first and finals, the ****** taste of loss. But **** it was beautiful all the same. I can still remember. What it felt like to move on. The taste of freedom and fresh air, an urge to defy what was. And become something more again. But suddenly, the bleeding in my heart slowed. The resounding clangs of my inner bells softly faded. It took years, But one day I reached inside myself Expecting to feel the fire burning inside me. I can still remember. The dread that came with the lack of heat. The soul of myself, the definition of me as the hero. Was only embers now. The easy numbness that washed over me. The determination and inspiration that was me had left. I was broken, as I always was. But I no longer knew myself as beautiful. I was not a protagonist. I had written myself out of my own story, slowly but surely. There was no quest, no journey, no one to save or be saved by. Just whatever I have become. I hope one day to remember. My clumsy and earnest return to form. When my heart again bled ink and crackled with flame.
0
May 5, 2017
May 5, 2017 at 3:21 PM UTC
Embers
I can still remember. That burning feeling of inspiration, bubbling up through my body. It dominated me, defined me, led me to believe that I was my own hero. A protagonist on a quest, a road to travel on, certainty in my bones. Driven by love through the narration of my world, my story. Words overflowed from my heart. Staining the tracks, pages, and lilies of my life with my fire. Every heartbeat resounded like the clanging of a tower's bells. Each ring dictating time, order, purpose, place. I can still remember. The lingering taste of coffee on my tongue, my face sore from smiling. Hours spent talking and listening. The content of my life summarized like chapters of a book. The way my heart vaulted when your eyes met mine. It was like the moon pulling at the tides. Giving the waves motion and momentum. So I spilled my ink and blood, writing you into the story. I can still remember. What it was like when it was over. I hadn't realized I had been living in a cell. Scrawling my visions of the world onto every inch of those four walls. Diagrams and diatribes, the things I considered to be myself. Going mad in the most wonderful fashion. As I left I saw them for what they were. Mosaics and memorials. Poison and poetry. The passionate magic of first and finals, the ****** taste of loss. But **** it was beautiful all the same. I can still remember. What it felt like to move on. The taste of freedom and fresh air, an urge to defy what was. And become something more again. But suddenly, the bleeding in my heart slowed. The resounding clangs of my inner bells softly faded. It took years, But one day I reached inside myself Expecting to feel the fire burning inside me. I can still remember. The dread that came with the lack of heat. The soul of myself, the definition of me as the hero. Was only embers now. The easy numbness that washed over me. The determination and inspiration that was me had left. I was broken, as I always was. But I no longer knew myself as beautiful. I was not a protagonist. I had written myself out of my own story, slowly but surely. There was no quest, no journey, no one to save or be saved by. Just whatever I have become. I hope one day to remember. My clumsy and earnest return to form. When my heart again bled ink and crackled with flame.
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52
also morpheus, thou who art dusted leaves tremulous portraits plaintive angels creaking pinions, wasted paint clanging fatly unskinny corpulent boughs spread deviously; rip carefully sanity: a flagrant splendorous nymph hard arithmatic chime softly a dull pepper in my head: mostly cobwebs and fluff punished grinning skulls my teeths are clean and the smooth hollow of thoughts is a pillow budding dream laid crinkled masterpiece and fill it morpheus with your excellent meat
0
Nov 18, 2010
Nov 18, 2010 at 11:13 AM UTC
also morpheus,