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Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
Shimmer and flow
Wood Lake at sunset seems to emit a  soft glow.
Waves like edges move and dip
Feathering out, tumble and flip.

I hear the giggling of happy little girls
Dunking heads underwater and wetting their curls.
Scraggly young boys jump off a long pier
Showing their bravado that they have no fear.

Mallard ducks and tan little birds soar and float.
Passing patient people fishing off docks, or in a boat.
As I watch natures glory a gentle breeze caresses my sleeve.
I am at peace with myself with nothing to grieve.

I am very grateful for the time I spent here.
It gave me the chance to think with a mind that is crystal clear.
I was in my own world relaxing on my inflatable chair
With the sunshine as my companion floating here and there.

This quaint little lakehouse is a Godsend to friends
Who need  some time to heal, make changes or amends.
The owners are loving in spirit, generous and kind.
They open their home as a haven for the heart, soul and mind.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
July 9-12th I spent time  at a quaint little place on a lake
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
You want it a world  that is perfection
but instead you feel hurt and rejection.
You can’t bear to look at this life that you see
so the blindfold covers the pain temporarily.

The blindfold that you wear
Can’t hide all of your feelings of despair.
You want desperately to leave the blindfold on
So your fantasy world won’t be gone.

Remove that blindfold from your eyes!
Face the frustration, the hurt and lies.
The blindfold only hid from view
the pain and sadness that you already knew.

As you begin to feel your soul start to heal.
Look around and see what is real.
See your life as it really can be
full of  joy, hope, love and honesty.


Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
March 13, 2010
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
How will I know if I’ve made the right choice?
Will I hear a deep resonating powerful voice?
Telling me YES You are strong and secure.
          NO You are weak senseless and unsure.

How will I know that the future is mine?
Will I see an illuminating vision that is a sign?
Telling me YES This is where you belong.
          NO This idea of your was all wrong.

How will I know that happiness is within my reach?
Will I grasp an iron handle or a slippery leech?
Telling me YES Keep on trying, you’re almost there.
          NO How could you hurt those around you who care.

How will I know this journey going the right direction?
Will I smell a bouquet of roses or a putrid infection?
Telling me YES You chose the right course.
          NO Now your filled with regret and remorse.

How will I know that  Independence and I will meet?
Will the taste of freedom be sour or sweet?
Telling me YES Eat up, clean your plate.
          NO You’re starving but now it’s too late.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
July 10, 2010
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
I have loved a man who controlled my soul.
I want to be strong, but I feel like a fool.
I feel so weak, and all I do is moan
My thoughts jumbled, my words mumbled.
He’s taken my life, turned me into a drone.

He makes promises he doesn’t keep  
So I stand on the hilltop wanting to leap.
My heart breaks and bleeds
He won’t even try to fill my needs.
I’ve given all I can and I wish I could stop loving
This cruel cold man.

He takes my soul and gives nothing but pain.
Why do I stay when I have nothing to gain?
My eyes fill with tears, and I cry from inside.
My heart begins to bleed and I think it has died.
I want to run and hide where my eyes can’t see.
I don’t want myself to see this pathetic me.

But in hiding I’ll be alone with my hurt
My heart is smashed, ground into the dirt.
I feel I’m dissolving, melting away.
My mind says to leave, my heart wants to stay.
I’m weak and afraid and I want to retreat
How can a heart feel, when it cannot beat.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
February 2010-- The heart has healed, but there is still a worry that a relapse will occur.....
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
I Sit
And wait
I Sit
And wonder
I Sit
And don’t move
I Sit
Will I ever move
I Sit
And do nothing
I Sit
As time watches my life walk away


Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
This was my very first poem-- I probably should of posted in order- but this is the one that started me on writing my feelings in a poetry form.
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
Voices have choices, they speak of your need.
Voices that are mute cannot be freed.
Being mute and silent makes you scream inside.
Silencing the voices, your choices have died.

Speak up voices! Even though you are afraid to say.
Have courage and strength and take a risk along the way.
Will you feel despair or rejoice?
Only you will know if the voice made the right choice.


Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
Cindy Renouf-- March or April 2010
Cindy Renouf Oct 2010
The pieces of your heart are strewn on the floor
I try to step over them, but can’t avoid them anymore.

Your heart is cracked, swollen and sore
The blood flowing inside is stagnant and poor.

Your heart has been mauled and pounded down.
It has been hacked and sliced and is turning brown.

But it continues to beat even though it is ripped and torn
It continues to sustain you in a state that is weak and worn.

How can the blood of life surge in your veins?
When a rampant germ infected you causing you horrible pain?

I can see the droplets of blood that continue to fall
The blood of hope splatter all over the wall

Your heart must be very stable and strong
To endure a marathon of doubt for so long.

I can’t believe a person can continue to live as you do
Overlooking, forgiving and remaining true.

This heavy heart of yours beats on and on
Non-stop rhythm of hope that never wans.

Have faith and courage and don’t let go
For a hand is reaching toward you ever so slow.


Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
Cindy Renouf Oct 2010
I woke up one day and all reason was gone
Values and morals. Right and wrong.

All that I knew and once believed
Turns out I have been very deceived.

What a notion I discovered
An astonishing surprise that I uncovered.

The life that I thought I wanted to be
Is a prison that holds only me.

The life that I live is a lie
I want to be free before I die.

Unlock the chains that capture your mind
Open the door to freedom it’s yours to find.

Be brave and trust your heart
It only takes a step to make a fresh start.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
How can someone change overnight?
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
I’m lost.
Where is my home?
Where do I belong?
Where will I find peace?

I’m lost.
My path is worn and I trip over
deadwood and dried out brush.
The wind is blowing away the
remnants of a life that once was.

I’m lost.
I think I want to go this way.
To a place where I will have it all.
But will I still be lost?

Where am I?
Why can’t I find my path to happiness?
I yearn for newness but am afraid of the unfamiliar.
I long for a full-filled life, but do nothing to fill my soul.
How can I find it when
I’m lost
To a life that is afraid to be lived.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
Cindy Renouf    March 2010
Cindy Renouf Jul 2010
Waiting
Wanting
Needing
Knowing that I may be hurt.

Thinking
Damning
Loving
Hating that I am so weak.

Fighting
Embracing
Desiring
Wondering what will become of me.

Caring
Crying
Denying
Listening to the voice inside my soul.

Longing
Hoping
Dreaming
Realizing that it may never come true.

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128
February 17, 2010   This was one of my first few poems I wrote when I saw that poetry helped me with my feelings.    Its on Stumble as well. Cindy1128  and on Youtube. (Go to jnsavedbythebell)  if you want to see this set to music.
Cindy Renouf Oct 2010
I don’t know how I feel
Do I feel sad?
    mad?
    lonely
    fake?
    Real?

I don’t know which way to go
I’m stuck
My body is trapped in pool of sticky muck

I don’t want to be here or go there
I am immobile so I sit and stare.
Or I spin around in a circle
Round and round turning purple

If only I could decide
Stop this never ending ride.
A trip that takes me nowhere
Nowhere is the place where I hide

Where do I belong
Every place I go feels wrong
I’m weak and confused
Why can’t I be strong?

Copyright *CindyRenouf @2010
www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/Cindy1128

— The End —