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Alyssa Underwood Nov 2015
Worship is the soul’s feasting upon that which it believes will fill it up
and we perpetually worship whatever we deem most worthy
of our attention and affection and sacrifice.
It is so firmly set in our very nature that at all times
we will be worshiping something
for the soul knows no other recourse.

There is only One worthy of such devotion
but if we aren't continually looking to and bowing down
to this One Who alone has the power to satisfy, heal and free us
we will automatically default to worshiping created things that then
have the power only to disappoint, damage and enslave us.
somewhere between the fourth and fifth
load of laundry,

sometime after breakfast~lunch,
now served in the USA at home,
as an all day meal, per the edict of Mcdonalds,
start fixing dinner, take a break, walk to the mailbox,
retrieve the post and quick retreat back inside,
ah that Texas sun, bilingual chili hot,
toss the unopened on the prior weeks pile,
cause everyone loves company

the home-cold-brewed ice coffee needs a filling
for the fridge has decided not to help
by automatically refilling the pitcher

even if it could
I, busy folding,
needing two hands
and all my teeth
for folding

sheets

my master observes with one of his alternating demeanors,
this one, super silent watching, announcing that  I need a nap:

“don't you always say, baby,
take a nap when you can, baby,
for when you need one, baby,
you probably won’t be able, my baby”


with selected-hand-led fingers, he lays me down to sleep,
bids me to slow sleep, dinner will keep,
curling inside my frame, hands a cupping my *******,  
telling me a drowsy tale, inherited from his mother’s womb
and his granddaddy’s eyes and mindful history

there, is where, they find us, dinner fixings burnt,
me and my five year old baby boy,
still sleeping fast, around 5pm, bodies enwrapped,
tied by blood and entwined in old nursery rhymes,
Texas tall tales of Pecos Bill,
me and my very own

nap-ster master

<•>

p.s.  and they call me by my other name to wake me, momma
Nida Mahmoed Jan 2018
Women are Human,
When you utterly feel
the power of this one line,
World will automatically turns so divine!

By; Nida Mahmoed
Ayush Shrestha Aug 2017
You
I look upon the sapphire sky,
perfectly tranquilised,
with the birds flying happily.
I listen to the unchained melody
of the ferocious waterfall
and feel it inside me.
I look at mother nature
looking beautiful as ever,
like a fresh rose in June.
Then I look at you,
these three words come out of my mouth automatically,
I love you
N Nov 2017
Nobody ever taught me how to love myself.
I was never told to love the way my hair falls into light curls,
or the healing scars on my wrists, hips, and mind.
I was never told to love my stomach, or my eyes, or my lips.
I was criticized all my life over the size and shape of my body.
Ever since I can remember I was told not to like myself,
to think of myself as nothing,
to always put others first.
I was never the number one priority and I never wanted to trust.
Even at home I was told by the ones I loved the most that I was not good enough.

This is where the question originated: do the one's I love actually love me?
Maybe it was just an illusion in my mind,
that maybe the really don't.

I pictured my relationships with my family members as I thought  they should be.
I thought that because they were family they would automatically
say "I love you",
support me through it all,
respect me,
keep me safe.
But it's not like that.

It took me quite some time to realize that just because you are related by blood,
all these are automatically there.
It took me quite some time to realize that maybe they don't love me,
that if these things are lacking... it is not love.
It took me quite some time to realize that I was wanting the love and attention that all desire,
yet not all receive.

I was taught from a young age not to love myself,
which fed to my thought that I was not loved as I grew older.

Maybe if I was taught to love myself then I wouldn't be the wreck I am now.
Maybe I would have more self respect and wouldn't destroy not only my own body,
but my mind.
Maybe I would have avoided those toxic relationships.
Maybe my first love wouldn't have been able to take advantage of me,
and neither would have the other four boys.
Maybe I wouldn't have ended up in that hospital,
more than once.

Maybe if things were different in the beginning,
I wouldn't be so damaged now.
Kassiani Nov 2010
I always suspected electricity
Ran rampant through my veins
To make me dazed and dizzy
But unable to sit still
It made me prone to flights of fancy
So I left giddy trails of sparks
Blazing proof of my restlessness
That once brightly caught your eye

Once your gaze had found my own
My moods came in swooning flares
And you crackled alongside me
Filling my aching, empty silence
With shiny, blessed noise
We burned so beautifully
With my electric fire
And your trilling declamations
Light and sound intertwining
Like thunder that had finally caught up with its lightning

It seemed like Nature's order
A completion of the whole
Two halves that followed each other
Unthinkingly and automatically

So one day when I found silence
It felt like Earth itself was splitting

Panicked, I burned more brightly
Stoked the fire just in case
I feared that I had dimmed
And been the cause of this new quietness
So when I still heard nothing
I thought my efforts insufficient
And I ran my highest currents
Until my wires nearly melted
Thinking the sun and I were comparable
And anticipating a response

And still I heard no trilling
No crackling at my side
So I wondered if perhaps
I had shined beyond your limits
Swiftly, I contracted
Reined in my flares and doused the fire
Thinking sudden darkness
Might just shock you into sound

I finally heard the faintest popping
Not quite the rending that I wanted
But a break from quiet all the same
Afraid of spoiling the moment
I leashed my electricity
Kept myself dim so I could hear you
Though I felt the writhing beneath my skin

It finally became unbearable
So I flashed like wild lightning
Lashed out and struck the ground
Hoping for your thunder
A dark and roiling storm
Swirling raindrops and clouds colliding
And deep, **** noise

All I wanted was your thunder
But in the end
It was only me yelling
Screaming out for downpours
Alone
Listening to my own echoes
Waiting for you to harmonize

In the end
I was always waiting
Wondering when you'd chosen silence
Wondering why I'd let you dim me
Wondering how it was we'd ever *burned
Written 5/22/10
Albuna Sep 2018
It is strange,
Strange how someone can hurt you so much.
Strange how you can't sleep because of this person,
How you stay awake the entire night because you think of him.
It is strange how you suddenly want to be around him,
Or only hear his voice.
It is strange how every time when he looks deeply in your eyes your body starts to shake.
It is strange how when you think of him,
Your eyes start to shine,
Or you automatically smile like an idiot.
It is strange how your body can't move when he touches you.
Strange how you listen to every word he says.
Strange how you love it when he speaks about his passion.
Strange how you know everything about him,
But he nothing about you...
Strange how your friends say to stay away from him...
Strange how you don't listen to them,
You don't hear their warnings.
Strange how you believe everything HE says.
Strange how he doesn't want to know more about you,
And only speaks about his problems.
Strange how you help him with his problems,
Understand him,
And every time something happens, you are there for him.
You drag him out from the black hole he falls every time.
Strange how he writes with many other girls,
How he sends them hearts like he did it every time to you.
Strange how he wants pictures,
Pictures of your body.
Strange how he doesn't even ask about your problems.
Strange how his problems can't let go of you,
How you keep them inside of you,
Until they destroy you.
Strange how he called you every day,
And now he doesn't have time anymore.
Strange how you can't let go of him.
How your inside breaks when you hear his name.
How your tears you hold inside for too long,
Find their way out.
Now we don't write anymore as we once did.
We don’t meet each other anymore.
You don’t talk with me about your problems anymore.
NOW YOU FOUND SOMEONE BETTER THAN ME...
I wish you two good luck and I hope that she doesn't break too.
Nobody has to go through this ****.
NOBODY...
I hope that you will treat her better.
That you will listen to her.
That you will help her.
And the most important that you will LOVE her.

~Albina
To the ones who fall in love with the wrong person.
Diana Oct 2018
I once read the lines
“Practically on top of us
is a girl
with long brown hair
a black hoodie
and the tightest jeans I have ever seen
I automatically hate her
because those jeans
make her look good”
From a book

This mentality bothers me
I mean
Why can't we
Admire another girl's beauty
Instead of becoming jealous
Or envious of it
While attempting to find
A flaw of theirs
To counteract their beauty
Why can't we just appreciate it
While loving ourselves
Completely
Without making ourselves feel less
Important
Or desirable
Or worthy
Because they have something
That is "better"
Which is entirely subjective
Due to the fact
That there are many opinions
Of what being beautiful
Aesthetically means
Since there are many people
In this world
Which in itself
Is beautiful
We should feel empowered. There is nothing aesthetically that can make another more "woman" than another, so admire another's looks while confidently rocking your own.
stefan badham Oct 2017
left-wing people
and left-wing politicians
****
they **** the ***** of red Indians
by calling them
native Americans
they **** the ******* of **** and transgenders
by calling them
normal
they **** the ******* of islamic extremists
who hate **** and transgenders
by calling them
victims of Christian crusades
or freedom-fighters
they **** the ******* of blacks
by not mentioning the fact that they are black
or coloured in any way
and they hate the N word
but say 'N word' all the time
that's how ******* stupid they are
because
when anyone hears N word
they automatically translate it into ******
and those that don't know what ****** is
will soon know what it means
when they ask
and find out
what N word means
left-wing people and left-wing politicians ****
they appease
they make excuses
they ingratiate themselves
to every minority
but every minority
hates some other minority
and that is why
left-wing people
and left-wing politicians
****
eli Jan 23
I can't hear
No sound enters my ear
Every word is automatically blocked
'Cause I don't want to hear.

With all the voices out there
All with different versions of truth
With different pitches and tones
I don't know who to listen to anymore.

They're clouding my mind
Thoughts, feelings and emotions
I wish I can't hear them
I wish I'm deaf
I can't bear to listen to all their lies
It's making me sick.

I'm Deaf...I wish I was.
Chloe Hunt Nov 2018
Out of place
Lost in a world of dark
Craving for a taste of adventure
But never enough
This is me

In love with a guy who won’t last
A world full of unforgetting lust
Craving for attention that doesn’t seem to pass
This is me

Confused on who I want
A world full of questions
Shamed of the things I have done
My body a piece of jewelry
My mind automatically tries to flaunt
This is me

Moving from one party to another
A world full of sin and temptations
Craving to say yes when I should say no
This is me

Heaven in my heart but hell on my breath
A world full of light that isn’t promised yet
Craving for redemption
I never end up getting
This is me
JB Claywell Mar 2018
Every chance we get,
we’ll fail one another.
All of us.

We’ll talk over one person;
ignore all the others.

We complain that no one
ever listens to us.

We rail from our personal
pulpits against the injustices
leveled against the least of us,
doing so behind the comfort
of our keyboards.

Even if we know that we’re
wrong, misaligned, misinformed,
we fight onward anyway.

At this point,
the goal seems
to be that humanity
is choosing to be as
insular, isolationist,
antagonistic as is
possible.

We’ll hate one another
from across the world,
never bothering to cross
the street.

We’ll shoot one another
emails, messages of our
discontent, before we let
the bullets fly.

But, we’ll fire those too.

Each new home sold
will come with it’s own
chain-gun turret.
(Why the hell not?
It’s the American Way,
Isn’t it?)

We’ll climb down from
our turrets each morning,
log onto our computers, tablets, or smartphones;
sending our family, friends, neighbors, and even a few
strangers a fresh round of electronic hate-mail or
a few new anti-social media posts that finally say what
we all think anyway:

“Greetings and salutations!
*******! I’ve always been smarter than you.
I hate you, but I hate myself more and I’ve
never gotten the attention that I think I deserve.
Have a miserable day!
I know I will!”

After that we’ll back our
cars out into the driveway,
We’ll get on all fours;
fellating our exhaust pipes
for about 30 minutes.

After we’re exhausted,
(Get it?! Exhausted!)
We’ll climb back into
the car and pull it back
into the garage.

We’ll punch in the code
to our home security system.

The code will automatically
activate our ambient anti-anxiety
and antidepressant systems

(
conveniently included in our home HVAC unit.)

These will fill our homes with enough meds/particles
so that we will be easily sated, manipulated
all day long.

For an extra $200
these systems will also
post positive comments
on all of your social-media
posts so as to maintain
the body’s highest levels
of dopamine.

We want you to end your day
feeling like the center of The
******* Universe.

(Remember when they made posting
vague, attention-seeking updates
On social-media illegal?)

Lights out!
Time to get
the government-sanctioned
2.75 hrs. of  sleep.

Goodnight!
I hate you!
Stay off
of my lawn!

My chain-gun is
set to auto!

Hail Trump!
Hail America!

*
-JBClaywell
©PZPublications 2018
Robin Carretti Aug 2018
Do you really think
everything you
see and touch or
love with such care
Has your name on it
   *      *      *      *      
*Divinity meet the Great

     *      *      *      *      
Lifetimes healing two freaking amazing feet


The house Mr. and Mrs.
   I suppose?
I double dare them
Great Play "Domino"
Where art thou freaking
match
Lover of all time Romeo

Prince and the Pauper her lovely
peasant dress the big catch of the day
This is the fisherman
All hooks and bait of
workmanship
The naked play Julliete
begin
So totally wherein

The spiritual home
never doubt I love

Shakespearian historian
Two Love DovesVictorain
Spiritual growth

Unconditionally
Freaking Great Earth

Defines your passion
The best creation your birth
Our defeat nothing turns
automatically sweet

This is our
"Great Expectations"

What to value anymore
Constitution versus the
Freaking Show Institution

Full bloom maturity growing
adventure unknown
On the same wavelength
He still dresses the same
In the Same town
New York Serendipity
Ice cream cookie dough mix the
freak shakes

That's great no time for breaks
The Baskin sin Robbins
Robin Bob Bobbin

People are not surviving
Their world is too weak
They cannot stretch to hold

The French connection kiss
fourteen carats of gold
Making a rise in good stock
Cattle sold
The Trump Tower fall out stars
The great year for puzzles

The worlds are full of moments
when we shouldn't be laughing
Not a great time he meets your
sadness
Round star of tears kindness

In her movement happiness walk
The worst times bring out her
   freaky nature  

Never aches either to change
Furniture looks modern cold
freaking great hot she was told

To be bonded in a marriage
Feeling older like her antique
wicker baby carriage
Eiffel tower the powerful
romance hour meeting her
happy hour

He is shopping for suits
Going back to his Brooklyn roots
smells of food feeling good

Getting into someone's mind
Meet Robin Hood
If I can turn back time the vessel
The Joker wild fossil

Like a freaking booker
there is no guarantee
The Suspense is killing me
don't freak out

Not paying your rent on-time
Those specks marked up your glasses
Time passes but your making a
spectacle of yourself


Imagine the world all alone
Brillantina smiling at
the Mona Lisa petite ballerina
Great Professor brother
Freaking out sister
Two-headed circus the Freakshow  
The haves or
the have-nots week went slow

The trees someone's apple poison
Gives someone such pleasure
companion what a complicated
mission

  Too deeply dwell in the possibilities

Each morning we are born again
Broke some blood capillaries
Or time will tell the Vampire Diaries

Tomorrow is another day
How you wish every day was payday

Almond eyes creaminess
The pick-up color of your dress
What is curdling freaky spooking
No time to Hail the Mary
Milk Soy what a cute
little miracle boy

Even talking on your
Light up tree ringtones
Out of your comfort
high cheekbones
Egyptian Camels sandstorm
Kiss your Mother just feel

His smile fireplace candescent
With your lover, he could
paint your body how
time just went in a heartbeat

The world is moving but
you're losing some gravity
But he lifts some parts
Sinking your teeth into the
best corn on the cob

Medieval times his
sword is taking
Anew freaking shape
Emerging and peeking out
Hair is French braided fine
knotted

He zooms out freaking great
one of a kind Corvette
Calling to you your name
He told the world
standing like a God
We are all freaking great
  
Poets* Just start to know it
This is freaking great or not we laugh sometimes when things aren't funny but that's okay we need to move on and make it the better day even if our prayers are not answered its in our hearts the best parts are you-you are the freaking great
Aléa Boodoo Jan 30
Ive
Ive

Her laugh is the most beautiful thing I’ve heard...and I’ve heard her sing.

Ive is love.

Her smile is most precious when you see it for yourself and even more when you know you caused it.

Ive is life.

I love the way my eyes immediately find her in a room full of people

Ive

Every time I catch a glimpse of the angel with the beautiful hair, my heart rate accelerates.

Every time I win the lottery and get rewarded with the chance to smell the pure, indescribable fragrance of her blessed hair or her perfect body, every cell in my body yearns for more.

Ive

I love the way, without practice, my mind automatically puts me in a good mood..making me smile when I think of her.

Ive is life.

Her eyes are the most lovely when you pay attention and listen to the song they sing.

Ive is love.

Her face, the most angelic feature that makes you love and daydream about every detail and love every line makes you rethink your meaning of special.

Ive
2/15/2018
Alaynah Sep 2018
Being black
Being LGBTQ
Being muslim
Just being me
Or you just being you

We’re all supposed to be on the same team
At least in my head
But some people are close minded
And want to see some of our teammates dead

Here’s something Jermine Hodge, a young black man said
“I’m just like you
a human
red blood
Emotions
a moving figure
Why should you treat me
Like I’m about to pull the trigger?”

Over the centuries blacks have been discriminated
Because of the color of their skin
Causing a whole population of HUMANS to become sadder
But at the end of the day we all bleed the same color
So why should what’s on the outside even matter?

Being black, that automatically means you deal drugs
And all the homies you hangout with, they’re just a bunch of  thugs
Who play with guns and are thieves
Who gets chicks knocked up with their baby and then just leaves

Black people are the ones who walk around with sagging pants
The ones who get bullied by the police over “suspected suspicion” and not remaining a “proper stance”

If they walk around in the wrong neighborhood it gives that scared white woman a good reason to dial
But really it’s just a good opportunity to flash the blue lights and racially profile.


People say brown kids were born to end war between the two races
But people who are racist at heart, won’t stop their cruel ways
just because they see more brown faces

I don’t experience racism?
That’s what they think
But I’ve gotten called the N word ‘cause
My skin isn’t like milk, it’s kinda like a mixed drink

And being ***? Nope “that’s a sin”
God forbid us to love who WE wanted
but little did he know love always wins

If you’re a man in love with a man,
You’re obsessed with fashion and have a high pitched voice
You see? We didn’t ask you we just insisted without giving any other choice.

And you’re a lesbian if you have tattoos, piercings and short hair
And act like you have nothing to lose
If you are in love with the same gender you don’t love god!
Imagine what it’s like to be in his shoes!

You can’t judge someone because of who they identify as or who they love
If it’s not affecting your life, it’s not something you should be concerned of

Now, Muslims.
I guess they’re all terrorists huh?
But I guess we judge an entire nation of people
Based off of a few unfortunate attacks and call out the whole religion. DUH

If you’re wearing a Burqa or Hijab you get judged and looked at because you’re
an assumed terrorist
Yes 9/11 was a tragic day but we can’t blame all Muslims because of it

People will criticize no matter what
But I can tell you what one of society’s errors is
The muslim that sleeps in my house every single night
IS NOT A ******* TERRORIST

White people get looked at as the racists ones
But I can tell you that this stereotype isn’t true
Because my white mom has many brown daughters and sons
And my white grandmother on my dads side has 21 children 18  of them being adopted black kids, she took them all in because they were so beautiful and held her heart captive.

Negrophobia, Xenophobia, Homophobia, and Racism
These are all made up things for glamorizing human criticism.

The point of this poem was to debunk what stereotypes do
Also to remember never let lies and other people’s beliefs stop you from being unapologetically you
You fill the world
with secret meaning -

for example,
these small wisps,

these puffballs
that meadow to

dandelions,
Once they carried

my wishes.
They would scatter

on their strange
sails and raise

the yellow brightest.
But then,

you and I
we watched Amarcord

where puffball
swing seasons

into town,
salt a wedding,

mark the limits
of memory,

of childhood.
Now I see them,

gracing across
the fields

& yards
& I think

automatically
of you.
An icy storm howled and groaned about me, whipping the trees to and fro in its insatiable wrath. Sheets of rain poured from the murky sky, a torrent of water and wind pummeling my aching body.
I felt so small as I stood in the midst of the raging storm. So small and useless.
What was I but a mere ant, an insignificant worm in the face of this world? How could anything as small as I carry a ripple?
The world would still wage its wars, blind to the evil it was; injustice and oppression practically embroidered into the fabric of existence. Rulers would still dictate and control. The poor citizens would suffer in their poverty as the higher up drowned in their riches. Those who stood up and spoke out against the nobles were persecuted for questioning authority.
And so it seemed to me as if nothing we ever did would make a difference.
Lowering lashes glimmering with dew, I let the rain wash over me.  It seemed an ironic time for a storm, and I wondered if maybe the world was crying—lamenting over what humanity had come to.
“Why are you standing out here amid the rain?”
I took a ragged breath before turning around, blinking water out of my eyes. Eleanor stood behind me, leaning against a jagged pillar and studying me with an inscrutable expression.
“I thought I’d find you out here.” She said and pushed herself off the rock to face me. Her curly dark mass of hair was plastered to her face, and her fierce hazel eyes glimmered with condensation. “Moping won't get you anywhere you know.”
I shook my head at her. “I’m not moping.”
It was easy, easier than it should have been to slip on the masquerade, to look as if there was not a care in the world. The recent ordeals had left me drained and numb.
Eleanor threw her head back and laughed loudly. “I know moping the moment I see it. Now, spit it out.”
I clenched my fists in the pockets of my thick coak. “I am simply debating the best course of action to take from here.”
She grinned humorlessly. “You little liar. I see right past your guise down into your soft little heart. You can't-fool me, Flynn, I’ve seen more in this harsh world than someone twice my age.”
I tried to push the smoldering anger away, but her words sparked an inferno. She had no idea, no idea, of what I have gone through. How dare she make rash assumptions off of her own feeble experiences?
“You know nothing of what I have endured,” I said quietly, eyes flashing as I met her gaze.
Eleanor took a few steps closer until she was nose to nose with me. I could count every freckle on her bronze skin, every eyelash.
“You don’t sit around waiting for things to get better, you do something about it.” She whispered fiercely. “The world won't change itself, things won't just automatically get better. Everything that lasts takes time.”
Eleanor turned around and faced the setting sun; the sky lit up with the hues of the sunset. Her silhouette composed an impressive figure against the horizon, glistening with raindrops from the dull drizzle that now swept over the distant mountains.
“Someday,” she breathed, “you won't have to hide.”
I stared at her, enraptured at the quiet strength that overtook her features as she gazed out into the distance.
Eleanor twisted around again, her face somber. “Someday the world will accept you for who you are. But don’t wait for that day, don’t wait up for them—beat them to it and accept yourself now.”
A small beam of trembling sunlight entered into the suffocating darkness, thawing away at the ice that had slowly taken over within. I felt something I had not felt in a long time.
Hope.
Overwhelming in its promise and almost tangible to the imagination. I knew it was far away, farther than the length of the stars and back. And though everything was against me, though I would be met with opposition and suffering—would anyone else raise their voice for change?
I opened my eyes and found them full of the sun. “To an new dawn.”
Eleanor flashed her teeth in a voracious grin, her eyes full of promise. “To a new future.”
I held my breath at the words I would say; terrified my wish would disappear once uttered aloud. “To a world where those born of darkness, can shine just as bright.”

-Esther L. Krenzin-
-Roguesong-
#book #authorlife #mywritings #character #fiction #emotional #fantasy #creative #story #darkness #drafts
MUNCHY Sep 2018
He tried
to heal the wounds that were bound to hurt again .
Put bandages over the cuts that cut so deep into a person’s heart & soul that eventually
the bandages suddenly
peeled and popped  off again.

Every lie
that was once told is now kept
top secret
in group chats
which is no match
for how he responded
to the wicked ways
of  this so called
“Be respectful ,
Be responsible ,
& Be safe  place .”
Yet he chose to see the real
in people’s  heart & eyes.
Boy, was he blind !

He recognized
that he , himself
has flaws just like everyone else  .  Took those flaws into consideration    just like taking his broken heart
& creating it into magnificent art.
Yet to this day,
people still don’t quite get
the picture!

People hide behind the keyboards  texting ,
behind stage curtains
talking crap.
Stirring up trouble just like playing Chinese Telephone.
As a result, things that were not initially said and done
are now twisted,
conspicuous,
& can never be undone !

However, he managed to see past “he said -she said” crap .
Looked beyond the assumption of what people told him .
Deciphered the harsh reality of spurious and counterfeit people
& yet he chose
to **** those
people with kindness.
But there’s no change
to the content
of some people portraying
their ugliness within
outwards for all their “clique” to see
knowing **** well that’s not who they are within,
nor who they want to be.

Pleasing the pleasers
aren’t so pleasing especially
when there is no meaning:
If you ease in
too quickly  
into a person to comfort,
guide & advise,
they automatically are envious & assume you want something from them .
If you put
your pride aside
& focus on the heart of the situation of a broken hearted person & what they are going through ,people assume  you’re using them at their weakest point to get close to them for the wrong reasons .
If a person is crying out for help & yet only a few
come to the rescue,
people assume
that they are there to just feed off of the drama so they can make it their own personal business
& then later on ,
contradict themselves by
having
conflicting feelings
towards other individuals.

So he wrapped
all of that
into one knot,
threw it out his sight ,
& left it there.
He didn’t want to be
apart of those knots
because people would try
to connect those dots:
By swirling him
back in,
tangled & confused ,
part of their topic
again,
mislead & used.
ENOUGH
of the nebulous apprehensions!
HE’S DONE
with condescending cockiness of  people
creating critical confusion towards nurturing
loving individuals
Instead of
Deceitful
Distasteful
Deceivable
Hateful
Little creatures.

Yet he still called himself the fixer . Because he tried to fix
broken hearts but in the end
the only heart that was broken,
was his.
Tried to patch the wounds that needed healing for others.
Yet
he still went
through the healing process within.
Gathered a  new individual  in the  spotlight  to be more welcoming for others that don’t feel welcomed  in and at the end of the day ,
people that were nobody before & unforgettable now,
forget where they started
& who got them to a place
&  state
of belonging of some sort where everyone now knows their name.

But the unseen is mysterious which is unclear to the human eye .
Too many shadows that follow a dark path .
Too many chiefs but not enough Indians.
Too many leaders that get lost in themselves & when others get lost they can’t reach out a single helping hand to help .

But a fixer could have  fixed
some of these issues if
you would have let them in .
But no , you didn’t so
instead, he took a step back
& did him .
But when you needed fixing,
it’s sad to say that no one that the fixer helped, especially you , didn’t come to comfort,
rush ,
nor sprinted
to help the fixer that put in
all that effort to make you feel good within.
Gave you that motivation to talk to your crush over & over .
Boy what  repetition!
Advised  the situations that you could have thought about & done  for yourself without  him.
& now only God & the people he brings forth to the next her or him ,
we’ll be more than
enough to keep them
stable when
they felt like they’ve done all they can
for others that  don’t deserve their happiness.
So let me tell you something!
He’s gonna do all that he can
for himself .

He’s  no longer a fixer for those  that almost thought they destroyed him.
He’s now a builder ,
creating a pathway for his own happiness !
He
now has a story for all of those who feels or has felt ,
deals with or has dealt ,
With the outcome of pain , betrayal & agony of  fixing
other people even by the way you treated people in your life that was so damaging ,
is that they do now have a voice
& shouldn’t be a afraid to  exploit
the truth .
When they do ,
they too,
can be builders for themselves  when going through hell,
letting go of toxic people
& their **** truths .
So I have a question for you .
Now ain’t that a fixer ?!?!
Yeah I thought so too!

~ Jordan Munchenburg ~
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