With a line of light
Streaking across a sky
Disturbing the peaceful night
Thunder kills
The pitter patter of the rain
And a young heart skips a beat
Yelling her mother's name
Most would never think
Astraphobia could make
A girl think this way
It's like Evil
Whispers
Words that seem to be
Booming and squeezing
The life out of you

I caught lightning in your bottle,
and I swallowed it whole.
So torrid and treacherously lit,
I became the kind of something
you taught yourself to run from.
Skin tight and white hot,
I radiate light from all angles;
buzzing with fluorescence.
With my fingertips brightening
the curves of your lips,
I trace that familiar fine line
between your fear and fascination.

In a single crack across the sky,
I will set your darkness ablaze
and leave you with
a deafening boom of clarity.
Jolted and stunned, you take in
an infinite illumination,
devouring every inch of
the unknown color and wonder
once shadowed by your thick,
murky doubt.

Blink, and it disappears
as quickly as it came to be.
What you see, you can’t forget.
As the spots dance, staccato
in front of your eyes,
you run, just as you taught yourself,
fast and far, away from the light;
disenchanted once again,
as you recall the fact that
lightning never strikes
the same place twice.
the same place twice.

i wanted to be a storm for you
to wake you up in the middle of the night
and make you notice
so i started raining and you left my tears alone
in an old bucket outside
my voice was the sonic wave of thunder
that shook your bedpost night after night
my goodbye hit you like a lightning bolt
the Lichtenberg figures mapped your body
lines leading to every place my hands have touched
the tree branch that scraped your window was speaking to you
whispering all of the times i said i love you
reminding you of all the times you never did
the lightning screamed them at the top of their lungs and
you never noticed but now that I'm gone
you pour the bucket over yourself everyday
now that I'm gone you trail your fingers along the lines
thinking of what you lost
now that I'm gone you stay silent
just to try to hear my voice one last time
now that I'm gone  
you listen for me in every storm

i. arachnophobia; fear of spiders. more common in females than males, why at night you choke on the idea of her fingers on him, long and thin.

ii. ophidiophobia; fear of snakes, fear of being crushed alive by commitment, why in the mornings you never left your number, why you don’t call her back, why you regretted it later.

iii. acrophobia; fear of heights. why she stays out of circuses and away from people like you who would make her fall in love.

iv. agoraphobia; fear of situations where escape is difficult, fear of the plane that takes her away, fear of the open crowded space of your ribcage where paintings of her still constantly hang.

v. cynophobia; fear of dogs, fear of the graves where good noses could dig up the mistakes you have made, fear of a girl who made you want to get a puppy and settle down somewhere finally.

vi. astraphobia; fear of thunder and lightning, fear of being alone in a house that always sounded like both, the stormclouds of your histories always brewing behind flimsy doors. fear of finding her there and having her kiss you in the rain. fear she’d never come back to you again.

vii. trypanophobia; fear of injections, fear of drugs, fear of the doctor who looked into your heart and told you that your shaky hands and bad dreams were a sign that she’s crept into your sleep.

viii. social phobias; fear of social situations, fear of your father’s white knuckles on the wheel while he says, “no son of mine is a ***** like this,” fear of her mother’s judgement, fear of not being enough.

ix. pteromerhanophobia; fear of flying, fear of remembering how long it’s been since you actually felt alive, why you trembled whenever you held her tight, why one day she frightened you so bad that you left in the middle of the lonely night.

x. mysophobia; fear of germs. why you knew you’d only get her covered in dirt. why looking at yourself in the mirror always seems to hurt. why you will never be happy without being hers. out of this whole messed up world, she was the only thing pure.

She tried to enjoy the most miraculous time of day just for me ,
but the storms cleansing through her into a frenzy , with cotton in her
ears so as not to hear the thunder , eyes fixed on the floor with a broom
nervously sweeping the tea room ! Crying out with each flash of lightning , calling "the Kiddies" off the porch to stand under a table , drawing every dining room curtain closed with her hand on a Bible ...Nervously singing to grandchildren on such happenings , I pray for tranquil weather in Heaven for you Grandmaw on every evening ...

it was supposed to be a quiet Sunday,
but the populists were marching
to a funeral, a sombre mood shifted the
populace about like a deflated balloon,
they started talking seriously about
matters of no real meaningful concern -
but since they inhaled all that helium
from the balloon i didn't know whether to
laugh, or cry - but no everyday do you
hear stories about how an ethnic group
gets degraded from the categorisation
of **** sapiens to **** vermis -
page three of the sunday times -
flyers in Cambridgeshire near a school -
fascist propaganda - the real butch
English poultry stamp-of-the-foot in your
face - London? currently? phobic, in general,
ablutophobia (fear of bathing), acrophobia ( " " heights)
anthophobia ( " " flowers), astraphobia ( " " lightning
and thunder), colorphobia ( " " certain colours),
you name it - i'm starting to wonder whether
London didn't just cave-in, became fortress-like
or simply disappear off the map - about 3 London
boroughs joined forces with the Yorkshire
farmers? but i get it, we technically started to re-exist
about 100 years ago, get blamed for not noticing
the Holocaust happening under our noses (Max Kolbe) -
it's this Latin mentality, the areas once conquered
by the Romans retain this ******-up attitude -
the areas not conquered by the Romans, like Scythia
and Scandinavia, Balto-Slavia, Maga Germania have
a weird mentality to how geography is taught
in the western lands... it's usually referred to (this
continent) as Britain, France, Spain, Italy... maybe
Germany... and then the east... i know that Jew is
a negative word by mere phonetics, but Pole isn't
exactly pretty either - polish - i have to elongate
this word oddly enough - say it like: paul-lysh -
don't worry Shlomo, we're on par with this ******* -
not to mention Slav and the missing E - in Poland
these kinds of people are old grannies, the ones
from the tiniest of villages where medicine is still
taboo when they come to urban areas to check out
a tumour the size of a watermelon bulging from
their groin - still the miracle cure of the 'ave maria'
or something - pigeon brain puck puck -
i get it - well, it did end up being a quiet Sunday
afternoon - got so worked up about this malaria of
**** that i went to bed early.

A bruise has appeared―
where you had kissed me,
last night. O Miranda―
I am not going for any other moon.

Like Uranus, I bleed
in my eyes; from every pore.
Astraphobia― I am going to
stay in dark.

This theology of aneurysms?
Who was hoodwinking
the ancient gods in the battle
of murderous themes? My hands
start shaking.

A blue rash spreads.
In honeyed voice you invoke
your angel and seek blessings―
before you go for a ****.