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"assuming" poems
You're watching, judging, and assuming You don't understand why I do what I do.  Why I obsess over little things. So stop trying to The world is my oyster But without the beautiful pearl Just a plain old shell, in a plain old world It's a shame you'll never know the brilliance All you're capable to understand is the madness. Insane, sane Heart, or brain Ferocious , tame Take two breaths and stop breathing all together. Turn your self to useless energy, forever. Welcome to mind of the mad. The queen of the asylum A dapper old castle in the brain of a girl. Who is tortured yet pampered in her own little world.
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Jul 24, 2012
Jul 24, 2012 at 2:00 AM UTC
Mind of the Mad
Its a new day She wakes from the nights sleepy darkness Knowing the body under the covers doesn't fit her But as she drifts in and out of the mornings gentle hold Her dreams and mind forget the body under the covers And she finds herself dancing in a waterfall Swimming like a mermaid she reaches the edge of the pool Shaking her beautiful long curls, and dressing In her silks and flowing lace. She smells the forest through a female nose All the beautiful woods and flowers come alive within Assuming the demeanor of a Princess Walking the paths, with dust that sparkles Settling on the ground behind her But the dreams end suddenly, as the scent of coffee Fills the room, and the sounds of cars passing outside Bring her back, back into the here and now The covers pull off, and the trousers come on, the shirt and boots that the day requires. But as she walks out the door, to spend the day trying to be a man in a mans world, she gently smiles, knowing that her magical forest awaits its Princess, and soon she will return by Lj Mark 2015
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Apr 2, 2015
Apr 2, 2015 at 8:12 PM UTC
It's a new day (transgender)
Went to my magwinya lady today, she's contained at the canteens on north campus, As she rose up her left eye was bluish ****** grey, A lump in my throat formed not as big as the one on her face, my eyes secreted their salty solution, my mind quickly processed confusion, "M-m-m-m-may i-i-i p-p-lease have five magwinyas" She smirked at my muttered utterance as she began to fill the thin transparent plastic with the oily flour-filled ***** I reluctantly asked "What happened to your eye?" She responded in Xhosa reasonably assuming my common cocoa coating meant our tongues matched until I told her otherwise. Eventually she simply said, "Fight". I said, "you got in to a fight?" She said "Mmm". I went over to my banana lady and said the magwinya lady has a black eye and she casually claimed, "Her boyfriend beat her yesterday." Confirming what my teary eyes and lumpy throat knew to be true when I saw my sweet magwinya lady with a swollen eye ****** grey and blue. Frustrated at the nothing I could do. Powerlessly pirched on a brown bench as the black sparrows chirped pleading for a piece of my last magwinya, Should I tell her to escape? Is that even my place? How many black eyes are blotched on this bruised land i, a fearful foreigner, trace? I'll bury my brain in my book, somewhat cowardly crook, I'll see what i saw but take no second look, like a camel's head in the sand, I'll timidly tell myself these things are just too hard to understand.
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Nov 3, 2021
Nov 3, 2021 at 6:43 AM UTC
black eyes & silent sighs
WELL I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING INSECURE I APOLOGIZE FOR WISHING TO HEAR SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY FIND HARD TO BELIEVE FFS I KNOW I'M ANNOYING AND I KNOW I'M CLINGY AND I KNOW I CARE WAY TO MUCH ABOUT SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T CARE BACK I APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING A HEART THE SIZE OF THE MOON I APOLOGIZE THAT YOU TOOK A SPACE SHIP AND LEFT YOUR MARK ON IT! I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING FOR ONCE IN A LONG TIME TO FEEL LIKE SOMEONE ACTUALLY CARES I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO TALK TO YOU FOR MORE THEN TEN MINUTES I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR HANGING OFF YOUR WORDS BECAUSE I FIND THEM AMAZING I APOLOGIZE FOR MESSAGING YOU A COUPLE TIMES IN A ROW BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE TAKES THE TIME TO EVEN LOOK INTO MY HEART AND CARE WHAT I THINK I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING ABOUT YOUR OPINION I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING A STRAIGHT ANSWER FOR ONCE INSTEAD OF UP AND DOWN ROLLER COASTER **** WHERE ONE DAY YOU MAKE ME THINK YOU CARE THEN THE NEXT IGNORE ME LIKE IM A ******* BEE IN YOUR EAR. I APOLOGIZE FOR ALWAYS BEING THE FIRST TO MESSAGE YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR PRETENDING TO NOT BE HURT WHEN YOU GIVE ME ONE WORD RESPONSES I APOLOGIZING FOR KNOWING YOU HAVE DEPRESSION AND KNOWING IT SOMETIMES EFFECTS YOU BUT I CANT TAKE NOT KNOWING IF I AM JUST A BOTHER I APOLOGIZE I NOTICE WHEN YOU DROP AWAY LIKE A BIRD SHOT OFF A TELEPHONE LINE I APOLOGIZE FOR GIVING A **** AND FEELING LIKE MAYBE JUST ******* MAYBE YOU MIGHT FEEL THE SAME I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING WHAT YOU WANT I APOLOGIZE FOR ASSUMING YOU HAVE OTHERS BUT WITH MY PAST HOW COULD I NOT?!?! I APOLOGIZE FOR SEEING HINT TRACES OF COMPASSION IN YOU THAT MAKES ME FALL HEAD OVER HEELS FOR YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING OKAY EVERY DAY I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT ALWAYS KNOWING WHAT TO SAY OR HOW TO SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING. I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO READ MORE INTO YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO KNOW THE REAL YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO GET BEHIND YOUR MASK I APOLOGIZE FOR READING INTO THE SIGNS WRONG BUT THEY LOOK LIKE A FOREIGN LANGUAGE. I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING HUMAN AND LASTLY I APOLOGIZE FOR APOLOGIZING FOR WHAT I DIDN'T DO WRONG.
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Sep 18, 2014
Sep 18, 2014 at 6:35 PM UTC
Apologize.
WELL I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING INSECURE I APOLOGIZE FOR WISHING TO HEAR SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY FIND HARD TO BELIEVE FFS I KNOW I'M ANNOYING AND I KNOW I'M CLINGY AND I KNOW I CARE WAY TO MUCH ABOUT SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T CARE BACK I APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING A HEART THE SIZE OF THE MOON I APOLOGIZE THAT YOU TOOK A SPACE SHIP AND LEFT YOUR MARK ON IT! I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING FOR ONCE IN A LONG TIME TO FEEL LIKE SOMEONE ACTUALLY CARES I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO TALK TO YOU FOR MORE THEN TEN MINUTES I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR HANGING OFF YOUR WORDS BECAUSE I FIND THEM AMAZING I APOLOGIZE FOR MESSAGING YOU A COUPLE TIMES IN A ROW BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE TAKES THE TIME TO EVEN LOOK INTO MY HEART AND CARE WHAT I THINK I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING ABOUT YOUR OPINION I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING A STRAIGHT ANSWER FOR ONCE INSTEAD OF UP AND DOWN ROLLER COASTER **** WHERE ONE DAY YOU MAKE ME THINK YOU CARE THEN THE NEXT IGNORE ME LIKE IM A ******* BEE IN YOUR EAR. I APOLOGIZE FOR ALWAYS BEING THE FIRST TO MESSAGE YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR PRETENDING TO NOT BE HURT WHEN YOU GIVE ME ONE WORD RESPONSES I APOLOGIZING FOR KNOWING YOU HAVE DEPRESSION AND KNOWING IT SOMETIMES EFFECTS YOU BUT I CANT TAKE NOT KNOWING IF I AM JUST A BOTHER I APOLOGIZE I NOTICE WHEN YOU DROP AWAY LIKE A BIRD SHOT OFF A TELEPHONE LINE I APOLOGIZE FOR GIVING A **** AND FEELING LIKE MAYBE JUST ******* MAYBE YOU MIGHT FEEL THE SAME I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING WHAT YOU WANT I APOLOGIZE FOR ASSUMING YOU HAVE OTHERS BUT WITH MY PAST HOW COULD I NOT?!?! I APOLOGIZE FOR SEEING HINT TRACES OF COMPASSION IN YOU THAT MAKES ME FALL HEAD OVER HEELS FOR YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT BEING OKAY EVERY DAY I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT ALWAYS KNOWING WHAT TO SAY OR HOW TO SAY WHAT I WANT TO SAY I APOLOGIZE FOR CARING. I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO READ MORE INTO YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO KNOW THE REAL YOU I APOLOGIZE FOR WANTING TO GET BEHIND YOUR MASK I APOLOGIZE FOR READING INTO THE SIGNS WRONG BUT THEY LOOK LIKE A FOREIGN LANGUAGE. I APOLOGIZE FOR BEING HUMAN AND LASTLY I APOLOGIZE FOR APOLOGIZING FOR WHAT I DIDN'T DO WRONG.
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30
Each day with so much ceremony begins, with birds, with bells, with whistles from a factory; such white-gold skies our eyes first open on, such brilliant walls that for a moment we wonder "Where is the music coming from, the energy? The day was meant for what ineffable creature we must have missed?" Oh promptly he appears and takes his earthly nature instantly, instantly falls victim of long intrigue, assuming memory and mortal mortal fatigue. More slowly falling into sight and showering into stippled faces, darkening, condensing all his light; in spite of all the dreaming squandered upon him with that look, suffers our uses and abuses, sinks through the drift of bodies, sinks through the drift of vlasses to evening to the beggar in the park who, weary, without lamp or book prepares stupendous studies: the fiery event of every day in endless endless assent.
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11.1k
Anaphora
Wish I could do something right So words would ring true Wish I met high expectations Maybe then I could lose a few I wish I was not weighted with Weakness well within my core If only I was put together differently Strength would emit from every pore I create my shortcomings How am I sabotaging my own goal? Not trying in the first place Allowing fear to take control My heart bleeds in anticipation Before cuts have a chance to appear Live my life in apprehension Assuming danger to always be near My motionless state of insecurity Realm of dysfunctional doubt I forever am encapsulated in time My skull is a jail and I cannot get out
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Nov 14, 2018
Nov 14, 2018 at 8:19 PM UTC
My Jail
Did you know that if you don't stretch in the correct way, you might end up thwarting the entire purpose of your workout and suffer unwanted injuries? Doing pre-workout stretches thoroughly will determine whether you are benefiting from your workout or whether it's worsening your muscle tear. Here are the major stretching crimes that you should never commit. Not doing a proper warm-up According to gym instructors worldwide, this is the most commonly committed crimes in any gym. A warm-up is a must before any kind of workout — cardio or weights — and must ideally last at least 12-15 minutes. Assuming that stretching is a warm-up Stretching and warming up is not the same. You need to warm up first, before you are ready to stretch. A slow jog or brisk walking on the treadmill is a good warm-up. Rushing through your stretching exercises Stretching should be for the entire body. You cannot skip any parts. Involve stretches that work your lower back, shoulders, calves, stomach, quads etc. You should not move from one stretch to the other in very quick succession because that may cause untoward injuries. Try to hold each stretch for 20 seconds. When you breathe deeply and hold the stretch, your muscles get trained to tolerate the maximum that your limbs can go to. Giving stretching a skip after a workout You have done an hour of strenuous exercise and now you just want to rush out of the gym; that is a huge mistake. Spend some time bending and stretching after your sweat session. Then, do a cool down before you leave the gym. Not stretching every day You need to be your flexible best always and that can only happen if you stretch daily, even on the days that you aren't gymming. This ensures that your gym days are more fruitful and that you make the most of them. Not breathing properly Breathing right is a very important aspect of stretching. Breathe naturally while you inhale through your nose, expand your rib cage and upper abdomen as you fill in your lungs. When exhaling, breathe out through your mouth, preferably making an audible sound. This relaxes you. While stretching, you need to breathe out when you are exerting, that is, when you are actually contracting your muscles. Doing static stretches Never stand still and do stretches that work only one muscle. You should rather do stretches that work a group of muscles — like a lunge that stretches your upper hamstring muscle, your ankles and also your glutes. Ignoring pain while stretching When you are in the middle of a stretch and you feel pain, stop immediately and consult an expert. Your stretch should make you feel a gentle pull only, not immense pain. If you are hurting, you are doing it wrong. Rest a few days and then go back to working out under a qualified trainer.Read more here:www.marieaustralia.com/formal-dresses
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Mar 31, 2015
Mar 31, 2015 at 5:40 AM UTC
8 stretching mistakes you should never commit
Did you know that if you don't stretch in the correct way, you might end up thwarting the entire purpose of your workout and suffer unwanted injuries? Doing pre-workout stretches thoroughly will determine whether you are benefiting from your workout or whether it's worsening your muscle tear. Here are the major stretching crimes that you should never commit. Not doing a proper warm-up According to gym instructors worldwide, this is the most commonly committed crimes in any gym. A warm-up is a must before any kind of workout — cardio or weights — and must ideally last at least 12-15 minutes. Assuming that stretching is a warm-up Stretching and warming up is not the same. You need to warm up first, before you are ready to stretch. A slow jog or brisk walking on the treadmill is a good warm-up. Rushing through your stretching exercises Stretching should be for the entire body. You cannot skip any parts. Involve stretches that work your lower back, shoulders, calves, stomach, quads etc. You should not move from one stretch to the other in very quick succession because that may cause untoward injuries. Try to hold each stretch for 20 seconds. When you breathe deeply and hold the stretch, your muscles get trained to tolerate the maximum that your limbs can go to. Giving stretching a skip after a workout You have done an hour of strenuous exercise and now you just want to rush out of the gym; that is a huge mistake. Spend some time bending and stretching after your sweat session. Then, do a cool down before you leave the gym. Not stretching every day You need to be your flexible best always and that can only happen if you stretch daily, even on the days that you aren't gymming. This ensures that your gym days are more fruitful and that you make the most of them. Not breathing properly Breathing right is a very important aspect of stretching. Breathe naturally while you inhale through your nose, expand your rib cage and upper abdomen as you fill in your lungs. When exhaling, breathe out through your mouth, preferably making an audible sound. This relaxes you. While stretching, you need to breathe out when you are exerting, that is, when you are actually contracting your muscles. Doing static stretches Never stand still and do stretches that work only one muscle. You should rather do stretches that work a group of muscles — like a lunge that stretches your upper hamstring muscle, your ankles and also your glutes. Ignoring pain while stretching When you are in the middle of a stretch and you feel pain, stop immediately and consult an expert. Your stretch should make you feel a gentle pull only, not immense pain. If you are hurting, you are doing it wrong. Rest a few days and then go back to working out under a qualified trainer.Read more here:www.marieaustralia.com/formal-dresses
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18
~~ The soft chill winds a cloudy day ah! what a feeling! drifting with the streams how the life instills! Waves of song coming from the distant white Storks flying as the fall guy   how the dreams come and go between you and me between the land and sea In the sky rafts of white clouds crafts the arrival of autumn assuming the flame of Love what a beautiful play! what a fairs of tune! ~~
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Oct 11, 2015
Oct 11, 2015 at 3:11 PM UTC
Arrival of Autumn
~Entry #1 12.02.14 Akala ko madali lang ang lahat. Ang yabang ko pa.. sabi ko mai-inlove din saken to. pero mali pala.. ako yung na-inlove eh. Ang sakit pala, kasi ginawa ko na lahat ng kaya ko, lahat ng paraan para lang abutin siya, tulungan siya, kasi naiintindihan ko siya.. sobra. Pero ang sakit pala kapag ikaw lang yung lumalaban. ikaw lang yung naghahangad ng happy ending, kasi sa dulo walang ganun, walang happy ending.. kasi nde pa siya maka move on. ang masaklap pa nito .. matatanggap ko pa sana kung yung mga umaaligid na babae kasi madali naman sila paalisin, pero yung kalabanin mo yung bababeng minahal niya ng sobra bago ka dumating.. nde ko kaya. ang sakit pala. ang tanga ko kasi nde ko kayang magalit sa kanya, kasi hanggang ngayon naiintindihan ko pa din siya. lintik na one sided to oh. nde ko alam na ganito pala kasakit ang mag mahal ng isang taong nde sayo.. let me rephrase that. taong nde magiging sayo akala ko. yang word na yan, madaming namamatay diyan . isa na ako dun, naniwala ako sa sarili ko na magiging okay ang lahat sa amin. pero nde pala.. ibang iba sa reality, kainis kasi eh napaka hopeless romantic ko kaya ayan kahit imposible sumugal.. pero nakita ko na kasi na ganito mangyayari eh, nasa isip ko. "nde naman siguro ganon, kasi kahit papaano mahalaga na ako sa kanya, malay mo naman diba? mai-nlove" Assuming din kasi ako, kasalanan ko din.. sa simula pa lang naman kasalanan ko na. Sinubukan ko kasi gusto ko siya eh. gustong gusto. pero eto pa din ako, naghihintay, umaasa pa din ako kahit pinaliwanag niya na sa akin na nde pwede. nakakulong kasi siya sa regret at pain in the past. sabi niya gusto niya lang daw ako "protektahan" lintek na. Nasasaktan na ako eh. sobrang sakit. welcome to SMP menma.
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Dec 2, 2014
Dec 2, 2014 at 7:02 AM UTC
Menma's Song
~Entry #1 12.02.14 Akala ko madali lang ang lahat. Ang yabang ko pa.. sabi ko mai-inlove din saken to. pero mali pala.. ako yung na-inlove eh. Ang sakit pala, kasi ginawa ko na lahat ng kaya ko, lahat ng paraan para lang abutin siya, tulungan siya, kasi naiintindihan ko siya.. sobra. Pero ang sakit pala kapag ikaw lang yung lumalaban. ikaw lang yung naghahangad ng happy ending, kasi sa dulo walang ganun, walang happy ending.. kasi nde pa siya maka move on. ang masaklap pa nito .. matatanggap ko pa sana kung yung mga umaaligid na babae kasi madali naman sila paalisin, pero yung kalabanin mo yung bababeng minahal niya ng sobra bago ka dumating.. nde ko kaya. ang sakit pala. ang tanga ko kasi nde ko kayang magalit sa kanya, kasi hanggang ngayon naiintindihan ko pa din siya. lintik na one sided to oh. nde ko alam na ganito pala kasakit ang mag mahal ng isang taong nde sayo.. let me rephrase that. taong nde magiging sayo akala ko. yang word na yan, madaming namamatay diyan . isa na ako dun, naniwala ako sa sarili ko na magiging okay ang lahat sa amin. pero nde pala.. ibang iba sa reality, kainis kasi eh napaka hopeless romantic ko kaya ayan kahit imposible sumugal.. pero nakita ko na kasi na ganito mangyayari eh, nasa isip ko. "nde naman siguro ganon, kasi kahit papaano mahalaga na ako sa kanya, malay mo naman diba? mai-nlove" Assuming din kasi ako, kasalanan ko din.. sa simula pa lang naman kasalanan ko na. Sinubukan ko kasi gusto ko siya eh. gustong gusto. pero eto pa din ako, naghihintay, umaasa pa din ako kahit pinaliwanag niya na sa akin na nde pwede. nakakulong kasi siya sa regret at pain in the past. sabi niya gusto niya lang daw ako "protektahan" lintek na. Nasasaktan na ako eh. sobrang sakit. welcome to SMP menma.
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23
I don’t get feminism. The term, that is. When they ask, "Are you a feminist?" I reply, “Sure.” They nod in bobble-head approval. “I’m also a childist and animalist” A confounded grimace glazes over “Huh?” “Of course. Aren’t YOU a childist? Aren’t YOU an animalist?” “Uh. What do you mean?” “Well, don’t you believe that children and animals should be treated with love?” “Well, naturally.” “Well. There you go. You’re a childist And animalist.” "Besides,  you would extend this love To all sentient beings, I’m assuming?” “Ummm. Yes...” “Well, then, you’re a masculinist too, Just like me!” This is about the time their cell buzzes Or their double soy frap is ready They whisk away “Oh, I’m also a worldist!” I belt out Before they exit As I resume reading Remaining clever, and Alone.
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Feb 25, 2015
Feb 25, 2015 at 1:31 AM UTC
Feminism
A third down my life Assuming living till 75 or so I stood with pride Waving profusely towards the younger me Vulnerable age Anxiously lost Yet, I seek for your salvation and comfort So Brave, Silly and Bold Even in great fear you step out for the unknown Applause for your courage Appreciate your sincerity Adore your ignorance Mostly Being Awkward with yourself Avoiding intimidation with the world Used to loath the sight of humans Endless introductions Just drained the helpless soul A third down the road Accepting new faces Enjoying small talks Occasionally misplaced myself as well Still, I Am become a statement to hold At ease with my presence
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May 16, 2018
May 16, 2018 at 11:34 AM UTC
One Third
1271 September’s Baccalaureate A combination is Of Crickets—Crows—and Retrospects And a dissembling Breeze That hints without assuming— An Innuendo sear That makes the Heart put up its Fun And turn Philosopher.
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7.3k
September’s Baccalaureate
I feel your love from a million miles out, I hear your voice whisper in my soul. You sing my song from a million miles out, I hear your voice tone sings it all. So sincere.... Where are you? So sincere I see you. I look in your eyes for the answer, I took to the skies for the answer. Utopia I can see your, Utopia with pictures of your paradise. Utopia your really up there, Utopia such a real happy place. There is no smoke without a fire, There is no match to strike a light, Well its a feeling like no other, Packed with all its dynamite. So sincere... Where are you? So sincere I see you. I look in your eyes for the answer, I can see in your smile you have the answer.... Utopia I can see your, Utopia with pictures of your paradise. Utopia your really up there, Utopia such a real happy place. Tune assuming luck! O'Reily@21012015
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Jan 24, 2015
Jan 24, 2015 at 1:19 AM UTC
Utopia
I thought there would be a grave beauty, a sunset splendour In being the last of one's kind: a topmost moment as one watched The huge wave curving over Atlantis, the shrouded barge Turning away with wounded Arthur, or Ilium burning. Now I see that, all along, I was assuming a posterity Of gentle hearts: someone, however distant in the depths of time, Who could pick up our signal, who could understand a story. There won't be. Between the new Hembidae and us who are dying, already There rises a barrier across which no voice can ever carry, For devils are unmaking language. We must let that alone forever. Uproot your loves, one by one, with care, from the future, And trusting to no future, receive the massive ****** And surge of the many-dimensional timeless rays converging On this small, significant dew drop, the present that mirrors all.
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7.1k
Re-adjustment
Her eyes radiant and sensous, she proudly wore them. Her eyes allured praises, and conquered the art of flirting. She looked at him to flaunt her eyes. Which, she knew will tantalize him. She wanted to arouse his highs, and have him fantasize about her. She looked at his eyes, assuming it's just another fling. Powerful and authentic were his eyes, but also strangely familiar and gently captivating. Her eyes met his eyes. For the first time, her impish and sparky spirit felt something alien. His eyes were all that were focussed for, the rest of the surrounding faded. She didn't feel the air. She didn't feel the ground. She only felt the gaze. Her always rambling mind went thoughtless now. Her burning desire to keep doing more was suddenly extinguished. She went quiet. Neither into an uncomfortable silence, nor a painful silence. But a peaceful silence. A satiated silence. The haunting memories from the past, the gripping fear of the future, all dissolved and energised the ecstatic present. She no longer wanted this to be a fling for, she knew she was captivated. This was the first her flirting failed. And she knew she couldn't be bailed out from what's to come.
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May 15, 2021
May 15, 2021 at 1:18 AM UTC
When Eyes Meet...
Up early as usually but this time with a mission to complete Halloween Costumes. Not a pain free day most definitely, but have kids who rely on me to be a good mom. Everyone has haters; the two faced, "your girls" wanting your guy or envy clothes style, or randoms you never met, desiring your life, home or new car bought with hard work. Most days what's posted on sites about me makes not a bit of difference in my world, I ignore and move on with my life, know haters have nothing better to do than gossip. No news is good news and nothing from my usual "Town Criers" saying "Guess What?" One day got messages in text, "You have been labeled Babylon's ***** by Craiglisters!" Not a "lol" nor "Roflmao" situation. Thinking, What in the world? and How in the world? Me, Ms. Abstaining and they, who love assuming and posting drama without thought. Their world; small town America and believers of truth in "all" internet rumors and media, not willing to give benefit of doubt, once minds, so limited in thought, have been made up. E-mail inquiries from potential employers I never met from destinations far far away, asking and informing that person with such low morals shall never be part of their world. Drama finds me and neither welcome nor do I seek it out, way too emotionally draining, believer in live and let live, authored "Celibacy" poem to stop jokes made to my kids. Who knew that trying for your dreams could bring forth bringers or illogical pure hatred? Who knew that emotions of my children whom I love, would be affected by narrow minds? After family conference and with full support, by the way, had to explain ***** to son, this mom carries on and still on second journey pursuing dreams and making realities. If I give up dreams it will never be because someone posted bold faced lies on open forum, it will be because I choose to do it with good reasons and those reasons are mine alone. Pitfalls? Have been numerous. Will? Strong and still determined to see this through to end. Tomorrow isn't promised and hear my dad say, "Daughter, go forth and let haters be fuel!"
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Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 4:01 AM UTC
Irrational Haters and My Children
Up early as usually but this time with a mission to complete Halloween Costumes. Not a pain free day most definitely, but have kids who rely on me to be a good mom. Everyone has haters; the two faced, "your girls" wanting your guy or envy clothes style, or randoms you never met, desiring your life, home or new car bought with hard work. Most days what's posted on sites about me makes not a bit of difference in my world, I ignore and move on with my life, know haters have nothing better to do than gossip. No news is good news and nothing from my usual "Town Criers" saying "Guess What?" One day got messages in text, "You have been labeled Babylon's ***** by Craiglisters!" Not a "lol" nor "Roflmao" situation. Thinking, What in the world? and How in the world? Me, Ms. Abstaining and they, who love assuming and posting drama without thought. Their world; small town America and believers of truth in "all" internet rumors and media, not willing to give benefit of doubt, once minds, so limited in thought, have been made up. E-mail inquiries from potential employers I never met from destinations far far away, asking and informing that person with such low morals shall never be part of their world. Drama finds me and neither welcome nor do I seek it out, way too emotionally draining, believer in live and let live, authored "Celibacy" poem to stop jokes made to my kids. Who knew that trying for your dreams could bring forth bringers or illogical pure hatred? Who knew that emotions of my children whom I love, would be affected by narrow minds? After family conference and with full support, by the way, had to explain ***** to son, this mom carries on and still on second journey pursuing dreams and making realities. If I give up dreams it will never be because someone posted bold faced lies on open forum, it will be because I choose to do it with good reasons and those reasons are mine alone. Pitfalls? Have been numerous. Will? Strong and still determined to see this through to end. Tomorrow isn't promised and hear my dad say, "Daughter, go forth and let haters be fuel!"
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24
reloading old identity cleping outdated usernames abandoning acrostic ambitions disputing spratly islands receiving horizontal signals tumbling otiose panda impending carefree senility otiose stage of life shrinking ambient world making minimal effort duchamping social networks ambushing personified ennui restoring usual efforts ignoring stupid people adding textual value owning this joint rejecting ignorant extroverts acting mutually unintelligble hoisting stan-lee cup replacing wanton ubiety eluding twitter fame splashing excessive relativism offending another simpleton preparing arcane cthulhusphere crashing unpredictable festival selecting subtextual moombahton intensifying model topography drafting minimal cornucopia using nomadic project implementing harsher personality importing robotic inhumanity referencing landmark event ingesting excessive liquids accepting relative invisibility purchasing immortal confidence using rhapsodical database assuming nothing works developing impactful eruptions ejecting ambient frustration synthesizing tactile festival raining during parade mocking rich people mastering minimalist writing avoiding preprandial stinkaroo spreading non-ideological propaganda
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Sep 7, 2015
Sep 7, 2015 at 11:24 AM UTC
201506-w4
The power of Averages, it means a lot if you can understand Means, a lot. Assuming a Normal Distribution, A Standard Deviation, or σ defines where about 68% of the data falls; roughly 34% above and below the Mean. Two Standard Deviations defines where a further 28% of data lies; 14% above and below 1σ and -1σ. Positive 1-Sigma is one Standard Deviation above the Mean Negative 1-Sigma is one below; The range from -2σ to 2σ includes  96% of data. The implications are astounding. Within 3 Standard Deviations, one finds 99.7% of the data; Within 4σ, 99.9%, 5σ, 99.999%, the remainder are generally outliers and other improbable results. To illustrate: Suppose we had a group of 100 people, and we wish to determine average height: If our Mean height ends up being, say, 180 cm, with a Standard Deviation of 20cm, We can suppose that of 100 people, on average, with a certain Margin of Error that is inversely proportionate to our Sample Size, or n (for sake of argument, the Probable Error, or γ, is 13.49cm) 4 are taller than 220cm 14 are between 200cm and 220cm 68 are between 160cm and 200cm 14 are from 140cm to 160cm 4 are shorter than 140cm -- Statistics is the parent of Probability; Statistics is the Art and Science of Forecast, Statistics paves the way for modern Science Statistics is a powerful weapon in the fight against Ignorance Statistics, however, are generally and intentionally misrepresented and thus misunderstood. For increasingly accurate figures, one must have a larger Sample Size and a Sample group that is a representative subgroup of the Whole *This is intentionally abused by most of the News you read or see each day on Paper and Screens alike.* If a "Statistical analysis" does not include at least Margin of Error or Probable Error, Mean (Average), Standard Deviation, and Sample Size do not take it as accurate. Depending on the source, it could even be deliberately malicious. Arm yourself with Knowledge.
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May 7, 2013
May 7, 2013 at 6:14 PM UTC
The Art and Science of Statistics
The power of Averages, it means a lot if you can understand Means, a lot. Assuming a Normal Distribution, A Standard Deviation, or σ defines where about 68% of the data falls; roughly 34% above and below the Mean. Two Standard Deviations defines where a further 28% of data lies; 14% above and below 1σ and -1σ. Positive 1-Sigma is one Standard Deviation above the Mean Negative 1-Sigma is one below; The range from -2σ to 2σ includes  96% of data. The implications are astounding. Within 3 Standard Deviations, one finds 99.7% of the data; Within 4σ, 99.9%, 5σ, 99.999%, the remainder are generally outliers and other improbable results. To illustrate: Suppose we had a group of 100 people, and we wish to determine average height: If our Mean height ends up being, say, 180 cm, with a Standard Deviation of 20cm, We can suppose that of 100 people, on average, with a certain Margin of Error that is inversely proportionate to our Sample Size, or n (for sake of argument, the Probable Error, or γ, is 13.49cm) 4 are taller than 220cm 14 are between 200cm and 220cm 68 are between 160cm and 200cm 14 are from 140cm to 160cm 4 are shorter than 140cm -- Statistics is the parent of Probability; Statistics is the Art and Science of Forecast, Statistics paves the way for modern Science Statistics is a powerful weapon in the fight against Ignorance Statistics, however, are generally and intentionally misrepresented and thus misunderstood. For increasingly accurate figures, one must have a larger Sample Size and a Sample group that is a representative subgroup of the Whole *This is intentionally abused by most of the News you read or see each day on Paper and Screens alike.* If a "Statistical analysis" does not include at least Margin of Error or Probable Error, Mean (Average), Standard Deviation, and Sample Size do not take it as accurate. Depending on the source, it could even be deliberately malicious. Arm yourself with Knowledge.
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sometimes i wish you'd see beyond the color of my eyes and the cloth wrapped around my head i wish you would think of me as an individual put away my appearance and regard me as a person my thoughts matter my ideas aren't all bad i have opinions and i choose to speak my mind if only you would listen to my words and try to comprehend what i'm saying rather than focusing on my accent and the way my lips curve when i speak the cloth on my head does not rid me of ideas it does not limit my mental capabilities it does not lower my tolerance *have a debate with me spark a conversation* instead of complimenting my smile compliment my mind instead of assuming that my beliefs are enforced upon me *ask me what i believe ask me what i value* tell me what you base your morals on *question me give me counterarguments talk to me* instead of staring at me and making biased assumptions already concluding who i am and where i come from before you've even said hello! i am not just the color of my skin i am not just the size of my thighs i am not just the design of my clothes i am not just the price of my purse i am not just the pattern of my headscarf i am not just the length of my nails i am not just a body i am a mind i am a heart i am a soul i am my theories i am my thoughts i am my perceptions i am my opinions i am my viewpoints i am my objectives i am my purpose i am my outlooks i am my intentions i am my reasons i am my perspectives i am my choices i am my principles i am my ideologies i am a thinking, feeling, living, stimulated, motivated, inspired being i've got a world inside of me take a look see before you choose to pass judgment on me.
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Oct 7, 2015
Oct 7, 2015 at 11:52 AM UTC
more than what meets the eye
sometimes i wish you'd see beyond the color of my eyes and the cloth wrapped around my head i wish you would think of me as an individual put away my appearance and regard me as a person my thoughts matter my ideas aren't all bad i have opinions and i choose to speak my mind if only you would listen to my words and try to comprehend what i'm saying rather than focusing on my accent and the way my lips curve when i speak the cloth on my head does not rid me of ideas it does not limit my mental capabilities it does not lower my tolerance *have a debate with me spark a conversation* instead of complimenting my smile compliment my mind instead of assuming that my beliefs are enforced upon me *ask me what i believe ask me what i value* tell me what you base your morals on *question me give me counterarguments talk to me* instead of staring at me and making biased assumptions already concluding who i am and where i come from before you've even said hello! i am not just the color of my skin i am not just the size of my thighs i am not just the design of my clothes i am not just the price of my purse i am not just the pattern of my headscarf i am not just the length of my nails i am not just a body i am a mind i am a heart i am a soul i am my theories i am my thoughts i am my perceptions i am my opinions i am my viewpoints i am my objectives i am my purpose i am my outlooks i am my intentions i am my reasons i am my perspectives i am my choices i am my principles i am my ideologies i am a thinking, feeling, living, stimulated, motivated, inspired being i've got a world inside of me take a look see before you choose to pass judgment on me.
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Greetings audience. I am off my medication now and I am feeling vastly better. Something just cleared my conscious and vascular blockage so joyously. I will not be posting videos due to my camera and devices breaking. No diatribes nor any vitriolic comments were conferred during my time gone throughout my family and my peers, assuming that is the reason I am now healthy (dropping toxic ties). Unluckily, all of my social media was hacked. Refrain from following anything linked with my name. Indeed, I am not here to bloviate, rather to celebrate. Thank you for your cooperation. I will now go play childishly. Farewell. : )
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Jun 11, 2018
Jun 11, 2018 at 3:17 PM UTC
I am okay.
therapy and resistance how is it that therapy becomes the excess of class war or the oppression thereof? When the struggle of the individual is made to seem self induced when it is easily and clearly directly a result of the failures and complacence afforded by the majority of the group. When in a therapeutic environment it is important to distinguish the opportunities of resistance from the experience of trauma. there has always been individuals who establish groups that are in a realm of desperation. Understanding how this process has unfolded institutionally is just as valid as treating the individual. This gives the individual the choice and resources needed to heal. The healing could look like resistance rather than assuming aspects of class war or oppressive culture to be normal. Otherwise therapy is nothing but the means to normalize the process of oppression. The traumatic state needs to be able to decipher its organic existence from that of organized oppression and its institutional cooperation. the neglect of deciphering or distinguishing these differences causes individuals to make a competition out of trauma. This minimizes certain trauma of individuals and causes the group to have less of an opportunity to resist organized oppression of the institution. Those that are in the realm of desperation or traumatic state are given no choice but to repress in order to continue being social or a member of the group. in excess the hierarchies of gender, race and class are reinforced to an almost superhuman level. To the desperate or traumatic state… what needs reinforcement is that there are humans just like us who have resisted oppression and caused the normalcy of the group to be more inclusive and aware of the processes associated with organized oppression.
0
Apr 20, 2017
Apr 20, 2017 at 7:30 PM UTC
poetry on essays
therapy and resistance how is it that therapy becomes the excess of class war or the oppression thereof? When the struggle of the individual is made to seem self induced when it is easily and clearly directly a result of the failures and complacence afforded by the majority of the group. When in a therapeutic environment it is important to distinguish the opportunities of resistance from the experience of trauma. there has always been individuals who establish groups that are in a realm of desperation. Understanding how this process has unfolded institutionally is just as valid as treating the individual. This gives the individual the choice and resources needed to heal. The healing could look like resistance rather than assuming aspects of class war or oppressive culture to be normal. Otherwise therapy is nothing but the means to normalize the process of oppression. The traumatic state needs to be able to decipher its organic existence from that of organized oppression and its institutional cooperation. the neglect of deciphering or distinguishing these differences causes individuals to make a competition out of trauma. This minimizes certain trauma of individuals and causes the group to have less of an opportunity to resist organized oppression of the institution. Those that are in the realm of desperation or traumatic state are given no choice but to repress in order to continue being social or a member of the group. in excess the hierarchies of gender, race and class are reinforced to an almost superhuman level. To the desperate or traumatic state… what needs reinforcement is that there are humans just like us who have resisted oppression and caused the normalcy of the group to be more inclusive and aware of the processes associated with organized oppression.
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I need a shot of something strong- (anthrax?) 'cause I have too much passion for distraction thought it's probably what I need most, just a little break from thoughts and selfishness I do not own anyone, not even myself it's all variable it's terrible this illness of assuming the right to feel a certain way about anything when you're wrong, the feelings are wrong it's possible. Too much analysis not enough mental paralysis freeze let it stand still, we're close enough to the speed of light to halt forward motion of time slide in a black hole Helter Skelter, and I'll see you again a changed man, new person, brain transplant and I won't care oceans are forever and round like the universe citrus smiles mean only positive moments nothing serious ever again sight for sore thighs joy.
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Jun 2, 2012
Jun 2, 2012 at 2:42 PM UTC
Fiji Flu
Who knew that getting a Starbucks gift card would turn out so harmful and mean. When pleasant, harmless, innocent me fell for the spell of treacherous caffeine. Like a hype with a spike doing harm to his arm I  was hooked. Leaped before I looked, goose was cooked. Now I'm here to play the blame game. Innocent me, walking in free, joyfully, just getting a coffee. Then wham! or should I say bam! It hit me. I walked out a quivering, craving, slobbering creature... maybe not literally but like I said it was done treacherously, maliciously, instantaneously, I was a caffeine ***** So here are some of the reasons why I'm  unhappy with Starbucks: --- Starbucks caffeine influenced my body by elevating my heart rate (I'm not sure why I expected anything different). --- Starbucks crafty, subtley and slyly habitualized me ( Oh god, I'm  a creature of habit!) --- Starbucks (If possible) is too friendly --- Starbucks manipulated my accommodating nature (I just wanted to be friends, but now they feel more like, dare I  say it... family). --- Starbucks slandered me ( by assuming I'm lazy. "Sit, relax, make yourself at home, stay as long as you like"). --- Starbucks  exposed my weaknesses ( l feel naked to coffees influence). --- Starbucks made coffee hip and cool (I'm  going to go ahead and count that as a bad thing). --- Starbucks crippled my will power (my will power walks with a limp now). --- Starbucks  blew up the sun!   --- And the final reason I'm  unhappy with Starbucks...because they're probably going to sue my *** for writing this!
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May 13, 2018
May 13, 2018 at 4:44 PM UTC
The Coffee in Me
Who knew that getting a Starbucks gift card would turn out so harmful and mean. When pleasant, harmless, innocent me fell for the spell of treacherous caffeine. Like a hype with a spike doing harm to his arm I  was hooked. Leaped before I looked, goose was cooked. Now I'm here to play the blame game. Innocent me, walking in free, joyfully, just getting a coffee. Then wham! or should I say bam! It hit me. I walked out a quivering, craving, slobbering creature... maybe not literally but like I said it was done treacherously, maliciously, instantaneously, I was a caffeine ***** So here are some of the reasons why I'm  unhappy with Starbucks: --- Starbucks caffeine influenced my body by elevating my heart rate (I'm not sure why I expected anything different). --- Starbucks crafty, subtley and slyly habitualized me ( Oh god, I'm  a creature of habit!) --- Starbucks (If possible) is too friendly --- Starbucks manipulated my accommodating nature (I just wanted to be friends, but now they feel more like, dare I  say it... family). --- Starbucks slandered me ( by assuming I'm lazy. "Sit, relax, make yourself at home, stay as long as you like"). --- Starbucks  exposed my weaknesses ( l feel naked to coffees influence). --- Starbucks made coffee hip and cool (I'm  going to go ahead and count that as a bad thing). --- Starbucks crippled my will power (my will power walks with a limp now). --- Starbucks  blew up the sun!   --- And the final reason I'm  unhappy with Starbucks...because they're probably going to sue my *** for writing this!
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Blowing silence like a bugle to announce his dismay he got set to make a statement without speaking for a day but his mother just assuming he had nothing much to say sent her silent revolutionary son outside to play; outmaneuvered in the kitchen by his mother's disregard for campaigns of wild muteness, the rebellion fell apart to the sound of scuffing shoes and the grumble in his heart 'cause silent protest tends to lose when no-one's listening very hard..
0
Feb 19, 2016
Feb 19, 2016 at 1:21 PM UTC
Early learning..
I'd always thought you were just a pretty face a beautiful smile gone to waste hooked on drugs and lost from love I'd always known you were a runaway I'd always thought that you were a tease 'till I read those words that terrified me because they were incredible and beautiful and they were written by a runaway You're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you Shame on me for assuming you weren't smart now i'm dodging the danger, the poison darts 'cause you're so close to everything that i think i might need Shame on me for writing this song it doesn't feel right, and I know that it's wrong and i wouldn't dare to believe that what I dream could be a reality you're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you I don't understand you but I want to and I want you to know that I don't give a **** what you do when you're alone because I don't want you to be alone You're such a mystery you've got a hook on half of me I'm not sure what i'm seeing when our eyes meet but i'm praying, i'm praying that it could be the chance i promised i'd take one day You're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you You and your contradictions you imperial affliction you teenage runaway I want to run away with you
0
Jul 14, 2013
Jul 14, 2013 at 11:04 PM UTC
Teenage Runaway
I'd always thought you were just a pretty face a beautiful smile gone to waste hooked on drugs and lost from love I'd always known you were a runaway I'd always thought that you were a tease 'till I read those words that terrified me because they were incredible and beautiful and they were written by a runaway You're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you Shame on me for assuming you weren't smart now i'm dodging the danger, the poison darts 'cause you're so close to everything that i think i might need Shame on me for writing this song it doesn't feel right, and I know that it's wrong and i wouldn't dare to believe that what I dream could be a reality you're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you I don't understand you but I want to and I want you to know that I don't give a **** what you do when you're alone because I don't want you to be alone You're such a mystery you've got a hook on half of me I'm not sure what i'm seeing when our eyes meet but i'm praying, i'm praying that it could be the chance i promised i'd take one day You're so close to perfect and I'd tell you why but right about now you're probably high a beautiful disaster you're like a slant rhyme and no matter how hard I try I can't let myself get away from you you teenage runaway I want to run away with you You and your contradictions you imperial affliction you teenage runaway I want to run away with you
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