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"anonymity" poems
Paint me in any colour you want, you wish for Draw any outline you visualize. This will fade, Falling victim to the seasons. A masterpiece Within itself, the intricacy of the strokes Shall be hidden by the next masterpiece That will take its place. The unsung, the Unheard are the ones who draw this, day And night. Going unnoticed, no one stops to Consider the combinations, the contrasts, Its various interpretations, almost like Those of a Rubik's Cube. Layer, upon caked layer, depicts violence, Craves freedom, breathes anonymity and Displays inspiration.
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Aug 6, 2012
Aug 6, 2012 at 7:59 AM UTC
Graffiti
[tongue taking taken prayer] *come worship in my temple. your tongue gowned by silence, thy teasing vibrations disperse my slack, exchanging it for a rigidity that is even softer, looser, an improvement possibility impossibly incomprehensible the noises of freedom from anonymity is thy silenced tongue unleashed, teasing, speaking tongues unrelenting and unremitting, tongues unforgotten for they never were learned, and incapable of being self-taught my pleasure sprouts mushrooms in thy loamy foam, thy rainfall nourishment, seed plant growing life morning borne, thy tricked up sonnets played within my hearts harp, tunes never known but coming from the land of plenty, my new promised land teach me where the apostrophe goes, the comma and why the question mark is curved and dotted like my body, why we need punctuation to separate the first from the next trees weep as if every dry rain petal is instantly imbibed, wanting more for my swollen by thy ministrations, I cry out my ice storm, my thunder, embalm me within the electric spreading in my veins shocking steady constant thy name thy name I beg to give thee a name to understand what has befallen me* you can call me by my favorite of all my seventy two,^ your first baby squeals and even now in human manufactured agreed upon symbols (words), every utterance a prayer heard and answered my name is a heated and unbroken hallelujah, I am thy god, and you, darling you, my beloved
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Aug 3, 2018
Aug 3, 2018 at 2:58 PM UTC
tongue taking taken ****** prayer)
. And her arms enfold me, I lay my cheek against her breast. The shaking starts, the tears fall, as sobs emerge unhindered. Cries from way down deep, and I hear her heart, slow, steady, metronomic. So I follow its rhythm along a path richly bathed in warm sunlight. Through an archway and across a threshold shrine, the cemetery of the Ancients. A hundred thousand names, carved in marble, adorned with statues and plinths. Holding knowledge of old, and the sound of silence, like an abandoned library. The shadow of love hovers close, driving through midnight mists and leading me on. Practising narrative necromancy, reanimating old words, giving them life newly born, upon the first carved marbles, its names burnished with wisdom, and the anonymity of obscurity. There glows one name in forgotten script and I know my deepest identity, the weight of the aeons flows free into my mind, histories of the millennia. I know my Forest Lady holds secrets that belong to me. And she gestates them all, a coveted pregnancy. A path-working, an etherical dream, and her heart skips a beat, as another part of me crumbles and dies, to mingle with the dust of ancient knowledge. © Pagan Paul (11/07/18)
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Jul 12, 2018
Jul 12, 2018 at 2:51 PM UTC
My Forest Lady Holds Secrets
I have never intended to be found existing in my sanctuary that freed me unbound shedding the mask of anonymity I've sought to maintain am i still the king of my sanctuary, my realm, my domain...?
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Jan 10, 2015
Jan 10, 2015 at 4:27 AM UTC
King
Who is she? I do not know. Inhuman. She tangles my mind like no other. One look, she glances over your soul   With her pale hues and feline eyes, I  have been baffled with her tight grasp. Celestial. Confusing. Crafty. Cold. That she is, She has casted a spell on me, That can only be broken by her. Who is she? Puzzled. I have been, A witch? Could it be? Her voice is melodiously venomous, I have been mesmerized, She has clung to my soul. A distinguished walk, The childlike enthusiasm, An enigmatic character, Her signals are vague, She is full of anonymity. Marked with beauty, a mask hides her personality The possessor of the key to my heart, She is a mystery.
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Dec 26, 2014
Dec 26, 2014 at 2:48 PM UTC
Witch?
I wish me invisible I want to disappear I am but a damsel Parading in knight's gear I want to be the unknown I need to be again a stranger I wish my secrets not shown Back to a time when it was clearer I wish to be a zephyr I want to be felt not seen I need to be less of the liar At least lesser than I have been I crave the comfort of solitude I long for the absence of physical contact I miss the tears that once had ensued Somehow then I was more intact I want to be an undetermined star I need to be unnamed in an uncharted galaxy I wish to retreat behind my avatar So you won't see the real me I wish me invisible I want to be protected by ambiguity I need to disappear from this debacle Into the welcoming arms of anonymity
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Feb 15, 2015
Feb 15, 2015 at 8:01 AM UTC
Anonymity
Heroes and villains seem harder to define when somethings happen to blur the lines The villain style of justice may appear better than no justice at all When the system fails the victim and makes the victim feel so small Where are the Heros when evil abounds? Are they still around? Who fights for truth and justice throughout the land? Who is brave enough to take a stand? Remember heroes often are easily disguised as ordinary people and don't stand out in a crowd Their anonymity allows them to work behind the scenes they effectively crush the evil villains dreams. The Heros tirelessly fight for truth and justice and selflessly care for others in need. They support and encourage those that the villains of this world have knocked down. The villains can too easily be found courtesy of our television screen they often make a showing on the 6 or 10 o clock news they are promoting violence they don't care about anyone else's views. As far as Heros go you may discover that a Heros heart is contained inside of You. Hero or Villain? The choice is yours Today you could take a stand to right some societal wrong Today you can be strong and be a Hero to a friend or loved one or a stranger in need. To them can make a difference indeed. Hero's Traits: H elping E ncouraging R espectful O pportunity Perhaps these traits are within you Be the Hero that you long to see!
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Apr 28, 2016
Apr 28, 2016 at 9:46 AM UTC
Heroes & Villains
Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety How we worry about the safety Of our dreams null and dainty And our wishes of hope and subtlety. Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety Maybe a disorder in personality Don’t know my main priority But weary about a certain casualty. Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety Forgot all my functionality Living life with absurdity Death with such acceptability. Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety Please more of anonymity Dealing with such difficulty Of one having anxiety.
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Aug 30, 2018
Aug 30, 2018 at 10:28 AM UTC
a poem about anxiety
Sometimes I think we’re all mere magnets Pulling towards this, pulling away from another Getting closer to your grandmother while fighting with your mother Moving out to find your identity but shielded online by anonymity I swear we’re all mere magnets Tired of running towards our goals but happily running from boredom Telling others we know so much but then adept to play dumb Wanting a bigger slice of success yet unwilling to gift the beggar a crumb Aren’t we all mere magnets? All relationships looking for some big reward And pulling away if our emotions become too sore Yet, what if some weren’t really magnets but pretended to be Could those outliers find one another and stick for eternity So my dear, are you a magnet?
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Jul 8, 2018
Jul 8, 2018 at 6:57 AM UTC
Sticking then Slipping
They came into this world Starving, pathetic, and in need of work Computer beings seeking profit, We called them millennials and, Like bacilli to honey, They will eat themselves to death; I’ll be waiting with an open casket. When the time comes, Issued as both punishment and reward, Fitted just for lazy things, And it shall be translucent, As all human desires are An empty display Of material just as ubiquitous. I’ll be the funeral director, Engorged by suffering, When the time comes I’ll be waiting with an open casket. The skin that does not bleed When struck, requires only a few Strikes more, The arms which do not tire When pushed, require only a few More loads, The will that does not break When overburdened, requires only a few Lashes more— When the time comes I’ll be waiting with an open casket And let the ocean, in pacificity Carry them to the collective Dead of this world, to churn in anonymity For eternity; a true hell to the ego, I’ll be waiting with an open casket Just to send it off with a nudge.
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Sep 29, 2019
Sep 29, 2019 at 12:34 PM UTC
361. Buried in Plastic
Stereotypes manifesting always, (Always) Trying to form themselves from something once seen, But not really believing in oneself, I see ignorance, I see arrogance, I see the lack of hunger, Observing such savage pride of life, I run from it all into a previous state, (Anonymity) I've reached the heights of total in-completion, I build walls of isolation upon myself, I am the collateral default of widespread degradation, I stand in the gap between teeth and consumption, I am the breed conceived by prey and predator, Widespread suspended animation: that is our future, We've tried to replicate the human makeup with mechanical frames, And the translation of electronic gates, Yet this is a folly, For staring at the mirrors of selected life in an artificial environment, Numbs our lives with emulation and self delusion, The days of nobility dismantle into fragments and sink to the bottom of the glass, Never to be turned over again, Scattered, Living among remnants of a life once lived with some sort of intensity, Now smoldered in a quite ferocity of anger beneath the surface, (Quiet tremors coming in flames) Because we don't live our dreams, We stand in the shadows of ruins, We are afraid of the future, We are afraid of the past, Where does that leave us? Leave me? I stand on the edge of The Void I'm holding myself hostage in the self sabotage entourage of the usual suspects, Our friends, our families, Disconnected with all intentions of coming together, Because they die in front of their screens, Not really living, Right? Light pollution massacre... We'll fall like stars
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Jul 5, 2013
Jul 5, 2013 at 11:58 PM UTC
The Dystopian Part VII: Urban Selection And The Eve Prototype
Stereotypes manifesting always, (Always) Trying to form themselves from something once seen, But not really believing in oneself, I see ignorance, I see arrogance, I see the lack of hunger, Observing such savage pride of life, I run from it all into a previous state, (Anonymity) I've reached the heights of total in-completion, I build walls of isolation upon myself, I am the collateral default of widespread degradation, I stand in the gap between teeth and consumption, I am the breed conceived by prey and predator, Widespread suspended animation: that is our future, We've tried to replicate the human makeup with mechanical frames, And the translation of electronic gates, Yet this is a folly, For staring at the mirrors of selected life in an artificial environment, Numbs our lives with emulation and self delusion, The days of nobility dismantle into fragments and sink to the bottom of the glass, Never to be turned over again, Scattered, Living among remnants of a life once lived with some sort of intensity, Now smoldered in a quite ferocity of anger beneath the surface, (Quiet tremors coming in flames) Because we don't live our dreams, We stand in the shadows of ruins, We are afraid of the future, We are afraid of the past, Where does that leave us? Leave me? I stand on the edge of The Void I'm holding myself hostage in the self sabotage entourage of the usual suspects, Our friends, our families, Disconnected with all intentions of coming together, Because they die in front of their screens, Not really living, Right? Light pollution massacre... We'll fall like stars
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42
started wearing surgical face masks in public to hide zits i dig the tiny apartments and the drift of tokyo skylines i dig the anonymity, paper thin walls you can hear a neighbor playing his guitar sometimes i wish i could fly back and live there forever quit living with an abusive boyfriend
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Oct 30, 2017
Oct 30, 2017 at 12:57 AM UTC
tokyo
... Mystery; Such that you were to me But nervously I swayed in your direction Curious; I couldn't help but catch my breath as you spoke of this dismal city and your photography So caught in your wishes to escape back to your summer adventures to the hustle and bustle of Tokyo and Seoul; it was then you felt such anonymity So it was then you had felt free. I look to you again, piecing you in these things that you dare share with me; so easily, eagerly. Quiet now, you look to me but I apologize, I didn't know quite where to begin. Mist and fluttering snow Clouding over our concrete city, We walked below the looming Buildings until pausing, to take a picture of me. It seemed, in this hour, it was only us who chose to walk through these deserted snowed-in streets You suggested something then, offering to take me up to the top of the sleekest buildings, to your rooftop sanctuaries I longed to see until it was only in my view- small specks of life below me where I could only see my sodden shoes dangle down to nothingness, to air, weightlessly as I taste the mist upon my shoulders and frozen hair. In awe I would laugh at the beautiful sight before me- to Skyscrapers that cut above clouds in the glint of the sun reflecting back to our eyes, and our cheeks who also felt the bite of winter's winds. Shivering, Soaked in hair and feet and Again I turned to face you but here, with glittering eyes, ... wondered where You would then choose to take me on our second date?                                                                 P.K.
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Nov 2, 2014
Nov 2, 2014 at 3:31 PM UTC
Mist
... Mystery; Such that you were to me But nervously I swayed in your direction Curious; I couldn't help but catch my breath as you spoke of this dismal city and your photography So caught in your wishes to escape back to your summer adventures to the hustle and bustle of Tokyo and Seoul; it was then you felt such anonymity So it was then you had felt free. I look to you again, piecing you in these things that you dare share with me; so easily, eagerly. Quiet now, you look to me but I apologize, I didn't know quite where to begin. Mist and fluttering snow Clouding over our concrete city, We walked below the looming Buildings until pausing, to take a picture of me. It seemed, in this hour, it was only us who chose to walk through these deserted snowed-in streets You suggested something then, offering to take me up to the top of the sleekest buildings, to your rooftop sanctuaries I longed to see until it was only in my view- small specks of life below me where I could only see my sodden shoes dangle down to nothingness, to air, weightlessly as I taste the mist upon my shoulders and frozen hair. In awe I would laugh at the beautiful sight before me- to Skyscrapers that cut above clouds in the glint of the sun reflecting back to our eyes, and our cheeks who also felt the bite of winter's winds. Shivering, Soaked in hair and feet and Again I turned to face you but here, with glittering eyes, ... wondered where You would then choose to take me on our second date?                                                                 P.K.
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60
Anonymity is an illusion He tells me. He tells me, No-one can remain unknown On the World Wide Web. Don't think deletion makes a difference, Don't think that everything you've ever sent Received And posted, Isn't hosted on a server Forever, Awaiting discovery and disclosure. He could find me in minutes, He could find me, If he wanted to. He doesn't, But what if he did? What if he did? I would feel safer If I'd posted intimate photos Or sexted a thousand faceless strangers. My poems are a diary of my soul, My hearts' helpless, hopeful blog. They expose me. No-one knows me here, But he could find me, And he would know. No-one is anonymous, No-one is unknown.
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Oct 13, 2013
Oct 13, 2013 at 7:48 AM UTC
Mr Ethical Hacker
Umbrage ultraism infrangible extemporaneous incognito edition Penumbral platitude platonic proxy photics rendition Interface fenestration imbroglio pandemonium inducement sedition Wretched infelicitous extant trajectory sordid intuition Scandalous scavenger squalid anomalous punitive condition Panacea chiaroscuro parallax emanate imminent perdition Equilibrist revision exertion suborn temerity imbues Indulgent zealous discrepancy apparentness cogitation accrues Heuristic noumenal psychokinesis extrapolation incursion construes Aura auspicious primitive prism processional reviews Obstinate tenacious preeminent edificatory omnipotence eschews Equivocal gumption ratification constitutional manumission ensues      Delusory apparition extravagance peccavi verity tempestuous Obtrusive obtusely overt indemnities sagaciously obliquitous Ephemeral anxiety antonym existential exigency alacritous Fortuitous emendation phantasm ontological ontogeny acuitous Indemnify veracious infernal infidel impunities iniquitous Meritorious fulham presumptive extrication expiation indigenous
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Jan 13, 2013
Jan 13, 2013 at 9:20 PM UTC
Anonymity emanations
Attention pivoted on the farthest Blurry are the things at hand The horizon seems reachable Near ones distances themselves further Clarion call from beyond the realm Here, the soul is writhing in anonymity A void, that threatens to engulf the known Uncertainties of the realization is real Heart is anchored here with situation Yet, the world beckons this soul The traveler yearns to break loose The farthest seems logical and reachable Distance will be traversed through unrevealed Journey holds key to reach the destination
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Mar 22, 2015
Mar 22, 2015 at 8:32 AM UTC
Farthest Destination
Somewhere along the line it feels like I lost my poetry. But I've always had a deep affinity of childhood curious-gaze with the light of a passing car slicing through a slumped drapery in the dead of a powerless October night like a fumbling mouse with night-vision, glassy eyed, walk, walk, walk run, run, run scurry-rubber like an imperial humvee of red-carpet glamor. Somewhere along the line the freeze of a less-than-bourgeoise temperature never felt close to Antarctic until the ring of a cell-phone became my national anthem and the complacent all-eternity-and-everything-we-are-and-more reflective one-eye of a laptop became my national flag I waived it with surrender calling to all nation states that 'I don't give a sweet **** entertain me.' watching politics like sports and sports like politics I couldn't help but hear the old Native inside of me scream in suffocated final breaths so I turned up the volume to drown him out and when I wished to return to his comforting embrace, I found he had drown to death so all I could do was stand over his wading body in the river of my mind and lax my shoulders in defeat. I rang the midnight church bell of 'send new message' to tell the world that didn't care the shaman is dead. all they said was 'finally, the shaman is dead.' I nodded, laughed, locked the bathroom door and cried until the river ran dry the shamans body so far down creek I could pretend to forget he had ever existed the ache inside became a masked anonymity with the glare of Dorian Gray I shrugged and said, 'I could never make time anyways' and fell right back into my sleepy routine with another cup of coffee.
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Nov 8, 2012
Nov 8, 2012 at 10:06 PM UTC
send new message
Somewhere along the line it feels like I lost my poetry. But I've always had a deep affinity of childhood curious-gaze with the light of a passing car slicing through a slumped drapery in the dead of a powerless October night like a fumbling mouse with night-vision, glassy eyed, walk, walk, walk run, run, run scurry-rubber like an imperial humvee of red-carpet glamor. Somewhere along the line the freeze of a less-than-bourgeoise temperature never felt close to Antarctic until the ring of a cell-phone became my national anthem and the complacent all-eternity-and-everything-we-are-and-more reflective one-eye of a laptop became my national flag I waived it with surrender calling to all nation states that 'I don't give a sweet **** entertain me.' watching politics like sports and sports like politics I couldn't help but hear the old Native inside of me scream in suffocated final breaths so I turned up the volume to drown him out and when I wished to return to his comforting embrace, I found he had drown to death so all I could do was stand over his wading body in the river of my mind and lax my shoulders in defeat. I rang the midnight church bell of 'send new message' to tell the world that didn't care the shaman is dead. all they said was 'finally, the shaman is dead.' I nodded, laughed, locked the bathroom door and cried until the river ran dry the shamans body so far down creek I could pretend to forget he had ever existed the ache inside became a masked anonymity with the glare of Dorian Gray I shrugged and said, 'I could never make time anyways' and fell right back into my sleepy routine with another cup of coffee.
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25
As I contemplated the project of writing a persuasive essay I discovered that I would have to have a topic upon which to practice my persuasive techniques .  After much cogitation and enumeration of my possibilities , pursued with such zeal that it soon resembled pedantic ostentation , I concluded that the most positive prospect I could pursue in this endeavor would be an attempt to prove irrefutably that I deserve a grade of A in this class ; if not for the undeniable excellence of my effort , then at least for the unadulterated audacity of my pretentious assertion .   In order to perform this feat first I must overwhelm your developing consternation , the frozen mastodon of your auspicious judition .  To accomplish this I will cite my impeccable attendance ; which although not perfect was indeed a valiant effort in the face of public opinion whose abstinence approached epidemic proportions .  I will expound on the effectual and pervasive inspirations of my in class commentary , which sparked many a heated argument or thoughtful conjecture ; and comment on the polished precision of my in class narration .  I will reiterate the diversity and intrigue of my subject matter and the competence of my delivery . Next , with all the dynamic aggression of a wind-up tyrannosaur , I will recapitulate and exemplify my arguments ; until the ramifications of my inductive collusions exceed the boundaries of your psychic phenomenon and you are forced to acquiesce into impunity .   Yes I will indeed proceed to exceed the parameters of your mind , until mesmerized by the multitudes of analogous content you find yourself , disguised as captain corpuscle , floating euphorically down stream in a think box mind gram dingy towards a sea of Colorado cool aid .  Then as if all that were not enough to thoroughly torque your ringer , adamant and tenacious I will portray realms of intellectual austerity so intriguing you will be raised to new heights of enigmatism , and then I will leave you , enraptured with your own anonymity , at the edge of the new world freeway .
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Jan 13, 2013
Jan 13, 2013 at 8:03 PM UTC
Persuasion
As I contemplated the project of writing a persuasive essay I discovered that I would have to have a topic upon which to practice my persuasive techniques .  After much cogitation and enumeration of my possibilities , pursued with such zeal that it soon resembled pedantic ostentation , I concluded that the most positive prospect I could pursue in this endeavor would be an attempt to prove irrefutably that I deserve a grade of A in this class ; if not for the undeniable excellence of my effort , then at least for the unadulterated audacity of my pretentious assertion .   In order to perform this feat first I must overwhelm your developing consternation , the frozen mastodon of your auspicious judition .  To accomplish this I will cite my impeccable attendance ; which although not perfect was indeed a valiant effort in the face of public opinion whose abstinence approached epidemic proportions .  I will expound on the effectual and pervasive inspirations of my in class commentary , which sparked many a heated argument or thoughtful conjecture ; and comment on the polished precision of my in class narration .  I will reiterate the diversity and intrigue of my subject matter and the competence of my delivery . Next , with all the dynamic aggression of a wind-up tyrannosaur , I will recapitulate and exemplify my arguments ; until the ramifications of my inductive collusions exceed the boundaries of your psychic phenomenon and you are forced to acquiesce into impunity .   Yes I will indeed proceed to exceed the parameters of your mind , until mesmerized by the multitudes of analogous content you find yourself , disguised as captain corpuscle , floating euphorically down stream in a think box mind gram dingy towards a sea of Colorado cool aid .  Then as if all that were not enough to thoroughly torque your ringer , adamant and tenacious I will portray realms of intellectual austerity so intriguing you will be raised to new heights of enigmatism , and then I will leave you , enraptured with your own anonymity , at the edge of the new world freeway .
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4
Beauty is power The words we teach our girls whipped mousse over the freckles along your temples will get you respect the zit under your chin will make you somebody to avoid for a month The rouge on your cheeks will make people think they've made you laugh each time you smile Taken more seriously under anonymity on cyberspace than to that same person talking to your face As the standards grow higher The modified faces and bodies of revlon and maybeline become tall tales in every sense The waistline is taken in to better display the shellac of that manicure why of course! as more and more voices go hoarse from taking out meals before in fear of a body to abhor when beauty is power and its concepts changing is it only to keep us from misbehaving>
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Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 5:05 AM UTC
Revelonation
So I've been thinking lately What if he's on a journey out to find himself reading Hemingway and Emerson (his namesake) and roughing it at Walden Pond smoking foreign cigars and staring deep into coffee to decipher the meaning of the swirls of smoke that rise from it in the morning? What if he's asking ChaCha! the meaning of life or trying out a new brand of shampoo or attempting to set a high score on Tetris or out burning down bridges just to see them ablaze or doing volunteer work, reading to disabled children at the local library? What if he's decided that this is all too much, that he'd prefer to live in anonymity trading his celebrity for secretarial work or carrot-harvesting or breeding exotic fish or renting out those inflatable jumping-castles? What if he's tired of all those books in Technicolor all the paparazzi out to get him and commercialize his favorite beanie just because he's on vacation because he pulled some strings at the office thus catapulting him into some movie set halfway across the world? What if he's sick and tired of them hunting down his girlfriend his dog that random wizard mentor guy that's a deadringer for Dumbledore? What if he would rather sit at home and watch the Game Show Network and change his name to something boring like John instead of living up to a thinker's expectations? Or maybe just the opposite, he's just watching Family Feud to pass the time because he WANTS to be a thinker but doesn't know how? Or maybe Family Feud just makes him lonely because he doesn't have a real family, just that evil guy with funny glasses and ****** hair and an awful Hamburglar taste in clothes? What if he's decided he's on the wrong path and needs to turn his life around? What if Waldo doesn't want to be found?
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Dec 22, 2009
Dec 22, 2009 at 6:05 PM UTC
Namesake.
So I've been thinking lately What if he's on a journey out to find himself reading Hemingway and Emerson (his namesake) and roughing it at Walden Pond smoking foreign cigars and staring deep into coffee to decipher the meaning of the swirls of smoke that rise from it in the morning? What if he's asking ChaCha! the meaning of life or trying out a new brand of shampoo or attempting to set a high score on Tetris or out burning down bridges just to see them ablaze or doing volunteer work, reading to disabled children at the local library? What if he's decided that this is all too much, that he'd prefer to live in anonymity trading his celebrity for secretarial work or carrot-harvesting or breeding exotic fish or renting out those inflatable jumping-castles? What if he's tired of all those books in Technicolor all the paparazzi out to get him and commercialize his favorite beanie just because he's on vacation because he pulled some strings at the office thus catapulting him into some movie set halfway across the world? What if he's sick and tired of them hunting down his girlfriend his dog that random wizard mentor guy that's a deadringer for Dumbledore? What if he would rather sit at home and watch the Game Show Network and change his name to something boring like John instead of living up to a thinker's expectations? Or maybe just the opposite, he's just watching Family Feud to pass the time because he WANTS to be a thinker but doesn't know how? Or maybe Family Feud just makes him lonely because he doesn't have a real family, just that evil guy with funny glasses and ****** hair and an awful Hamburglar taste in clothes? What if he's decided he's on the wrong path and needs to turn his life around? What if Waldo doesn't want to be found?
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39
Tonight I stayed at work until 7:00. It was dark when I locked the front doors. Winter approaches again, soon the great coat huddled like a rug around me. The streets were active as usual, block residents hanging out front steps. I said goodnight to Nydian Figueroa, after school counselor. I bought a beer at the deli on Third Ave. from the Arab owner. He’s a bit upset about the bottle bill. Collecting bottles from small groceries could be a useful youth employment enterprise. I walked down Fifth along the park in the dark drinking my beer and looking at women. I need a good **** badly. I tried to decide whether to go to the movies, a Hopi film Howard recommended, or just go home, watch tv and light a candle. Maybe I’d meet someone at the film. Can I handle the malady of going home tonight? If I die, I die alone. I turned west toward the subway past the museum, through the park. I can’t look at the myriad lights in buildings large enough to hold a small town. It increases my anxiety and anonymity to the breaking point. I hoped to be mugged, for the human contact. Two big guys looked me over, but I lowered my center of gravity and they passed quietly. Survival proves I am alive. The white pines in this corner of the park hold a cool, earthy air reminding me of coming winter, that mortality is restful, of the black bear and swollen river I saw 500 miles away and only one day ago.
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Jul 6, 2022
Jul 6, 2022 at 6:30 AM UTC
Life Out of Balance
It's the first time we meet. I can't get a read on that sweet summer smile, or the words that drip like thick robes of gold honey; soft-spoken and seemingly slow motion, a quite complicated question pours viscously from your lips. You ask me, "What is your name?" Now honestly, I considered honesty. Truthfully, I prefer anonymity, but it's considered rude to not share some glimpse of identity. Albeit reluctantly, I must decide: Do I introduce myself as "Chelsea"? Or as "A Window-Pane Made of Glass Too Thin"? Well honestly, honesty isn't always the best policy. It's our first date - Instead of worrying about which outfit I choose, I worry about the disclaimer I wear on my arms. I worry about the first time your gaze inevitably falls upon the self-inflicted displays of pain that dress my paper-thin skin. I worry, will you see a warning sign that reads "DANGER: Do not touch"? I wonder, will you listen? Or will you choose to swallow me whole, a bitter pill with a list of flaws longer than the side effects of your favorite antidepressant. Do the benefits outweigh the risks, do you take a trial of me to see if I'll make you feel better or feel worse? Do you pour me down the drain when you find out I'm not good enough? It's our first kiss - A moment tainted by guilt that the sweet taste I leave behind on your lips is not saliva, but antifreeze. Drink me down and I'll poison you from the inside-out, and there will come a day that I'll be the taste you'd do anything to erase from your mouth. It's our first fight - And then our second, and our third... The sand is slipping through our hourglass too fast, as we drag our blood-stained feet through a wasteland of eggshells and glass. All that remains is a crimson trail of mistakes, meandering back to the spotless place we started at. It's the first time we meet, and You ask me for my name. Silence. Should I introduce myself as "Chelsea"? Or as "A Window-Pane Made of Glass Too Thin". If I'm being honest with myself, I go with the latter...and you'll walk away to avoid the mess that comes after.
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Jul 8, 2017
Jul 8, 2017 at 2:49 AM UTC
Dating With Mental Illness
It's the first time we meet. I can't get a read on that sweet summer smile, or the words that drip like thick robes of gold honey; soft-spoken and seemingly slow motion, a quite complicated question pours viscously from your lips. You ask me, "What is your name?" Now honestly, I considered honesty. Truthfully, I prefer anonymity, but it's considered rude to not share some glimpse of identity. Albeit reluctantly, I must decide: Do I introduce myself as "Chelsea"? Or as "A Window-Pane Made of Glass Too Thin"? Well honestly, honesty isn't always the best policy. It's our first date - Instead of worrying about which outfit I choose, I worry about the disclaimer I wear on my arms. I worry about the first time your gaze inevitably falls upon the self-inflicted displays of pain that dress my paper-thin skin. I worry, will you see a warning sign that reads "DANGER: Do not touch"? I wonder, will you listen? Or will you choose to swallow me whole, a bitter pill with a list of flaws longer than the side effects of your favorite antidepressant. Do the benefits outweigh the risks, do you take a trial of me to see if I'll make you feel better or feel worse? Do you pour me down the drain when you find out I'm not good enough? It's our first kiss - A moment tainted by guilt that the sweet taste I leave behind on your lips is not saliva, but antifreeze. Drink me down and I'll poison you from the inside-out, and there will come a day that I'll be the taste you'd do anything to erase from your mouth. It's our first fight - And then our second, and our third... The sand is slipping through our hourglass too fast, as we drag our blood-stained feet through a wasteland of eggshells and glass. All that remains is a crimson trail of mistakes, meandering back to the spotless place we started at. It's the first time we meet, and You ask me for my name. Silence. Should I introduce myself as "Chelsea"? Or as "A Window-Pane Made of Glass Too Thin". If I'm being honest with myself, I go with the latter...and you'll walk away to avoid the mess that comes after.
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Hark verily my indignant venipuncture retrogression Saudade anthropomorphic coveting empathic repression Bask wholly in its self indulgent verbose serendipity Happenstance to necromance enigmatic anonymity Applied psychology catharsis my make believe aggression
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Dec 16, 2012
Dec 16, 2012 at 6:15 PM UTC
But you won't
don’t you know that it was you who like the Pied Piper drew me here to this cross road where my ideas collided with you in a state of bewildered joy pleasant surprise in spite of some inherent shyness; a tendency towards introversion would not stop this flow of words even as the cloak of anonymity fell apart like a bee finds the nectar that it is due Stranger, i found you. - Vijayalakshmi Harish 12.02.2013 Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish
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Feb 12, 2013
Feb 12, 2013 at 6:55 AM UTC
Stranger