Crocodiles catnapping cuddling in cordial cliques, 
Loafing, lollygagging, lurking low like lounging leeches, 
Protective postures pouncing prey with piercing pinned precision,
Brilliant belligerent beasts basking boldly by swamp beaches, 
Agressively angry attitudes among alluring adverse animals, 
Deep daunting jaws of death damage drastically when dropping down, 
Scales shaped like stabbing shards scrape while swimming strongly, 
Opposing opposition order obedience of outrageous odious opponents, 
Raged ravenous rapacious reptiles rank repulsive ratings and resourses...  

©Michael P. Smith

oh,

i’m not going to be happy

ever

and i’m doomed to be

divorced

because i don’t want to be swaddled in your sugar coated comfort blanket ?

i’m sorry that you believe love is only true if you suppress all of your satisfying, swelling feelings until the day someone wants to reproduce with you

and that you have to cover your most tender, lovely parts in ugly underwear and that on your wedding night both of you will

look the other way



it’s unfortunate that your God only likes you if you give him all your money and hate the right things

and that your life is a dichotomy of

knowing you are superior to everyone who didn’t happen to grow up with your doctrine pinned to their shirt

& knowing that if you don’t color inside of religion’s lines just so

you’ll

never

be

good

enough

for

salvation



and what if that still, small voice is actually doubt

and you spend your entire human existence trying to prove it wrong

by passive-agressively pushing your fear towards others

it’s sad that you’ll make yourself small for a potential outcome

while i’ll grow, grow, grow because i am boundless

you are too, but you don’t know it so you’ll pollute your potential with petty

judgments


yes, there’s a (pretty) ******* ring in my nose and some (meaningful) ******* ink on my skin and your son and i (beautifully) **** each other

i

am

no

less

and

no

more

than

you

are


your high horse has wobbly legs and thanks but

i will determine my own



happiness.

I am wide eyed;
Attentive and glittering and eager.
Consumed
By your incessant stream of enlightened expression.

Your eyes,
Enigmatically, agressively determined,
Seek constant, ruthless contact with mine.

I  constrict, I turn away
From the acute awareness of my inadequacy.
Of my comparatively weak mind,
Eclipsed by your emphatic,
Evocative words which lead
Me deeper, deeper into the black, unfamiliar,
Imbalanced analysis wherein you thrive.
Elevated, blinded, confounded by your eloquence.

But you are only beauty and truth and goodness and power.

And even in my stunned state of disordered mediocrity,
This I understand with irrevocable clarity.

Happy outside, depressed inside,
I'm sorry if I set you aside,
You are not someone that I can just leave behind,
There's just something going on in my mind.

I act so tough and agressively,
I'm sorry for the attitude I have lately,
I've tried to look over the problem closely,
Too bad all I found was foolishness, sadly.

i am sorry.
the light agressively
woke me up and
made me live another day
as a part of this
insanely organised world.

you said i had a
beautiful, misunderstood
mind.
so i began to act like
i did not belong there.

if only you hadn't failed
to be my home,
if only i had learned earlier
that i am in control
of my present.

these modern tribes
are so afraid of
loneliness and death,
each life is mediocre
and golden
in the same time.

I didn't know much back then
I think about it now and again
different skin
I want to burn the memories
take you back out
from in
me
and
you never quit screaming
passionately
but
never agressively
...that was all me
and
I know I was so young
I look back and feel ashamed
of infatuating feelings
desperate
for you to want me
to desire me
because when I love
I do it
with too much of me
it's like I keep forgetting

Hello
I have known you five minutes and you already trivalise sunsets because I would much rather stare at the chaotically confusing combustion of gorgeously warm orange and yellow tones that is you
Hello
I am already head over heels for the way my fingertips feel as they run across the so beautifully situated indentations in your silky soft cheeks
Hello
I already crave the homely feeling you bring to my heart when you're around, so delicately and innocently embracing everything I so hate about myself in the palm that is yours carelessly without an intention whatsoever
Hello
You are the kindest and sweetest soul I have ever come so near and so close to catching, so kind it has already revived things in myself I thought had died
Hello
When I am with you I feel the stars collide in my stomach, I feel like running through the rain and singing snow patrol if I just lay here, because there is no one I'd rather forget the world with
Hello
There are more things I enjoy about you, than there are stars in the night sky. I hope this sounds somewhat like a film, because that's what it feels like
Hello
I think about us a lot even though us doesn't really exist yet
Hello
I have never looked at anyone the way I look at you. My eyes lock onto you as if you are the most beautiful piece of art I have ever seen. Which is ironic, because I've always lacked the expected ability to appreciate the finest paintings in the finest galleries but somehow you are my Pablo Picasso and where ever we are together is our Tate Modern
Hello
I think you bring out the most beautiful poet I have hidden deep within, burried by years of melancholy and pent up anger. But when I met you that slowly subsided, as I was delicately filled with love and harmony
Hello
Please never leave me lingering in the unknown because you have made me weak.
Weak for the touch of your hand on my inner thigh as we drive
Weak for the sound of your heart agressively palpitating in my ear, distracting my only from the beauty that is you
Weak for the way you make me feel like I belong somewhere
Weak for the way you hold me close and make my problems feel as small as I am next to you
Weak for the way I already have so much to thank you for
Weak for the way you have been nothing but sweet, and I'm a sucker for cake
Hello
You are artwork and I could admire you forever
Hello
Please don't break my heart
Because you're the first person
To have the power to do so
And that is not how
I want this poem to end

pain creates the most
profund poetry,
pain creates the most
shiny pearls,
pain is the tool
that changes who we are,
pain is the sharp wind
in winters,
something you undoubtely feel
when you are brave.
an alarm signal,
a remider that your body is not
translucid and that it shines.
you try to escape reality,
but the remais of past
come agressively in waves.
morfine.
anyone can hurt you
and you are anyone too.
so what can we do?
pain starts and ends
a war.

pain is better than fear
as the blue skies are
better than the grey ones.