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Sad Girl Mar 2016
I'm afraid to stay in
I'm afraid to go out
I'm afraid of the words that leak out of my mouth
I'm afraid of my hands
I'm afraid of my heart
I'm afraid to share my music and the efforts of my art
I'm afraid of the judgement and the lack of support
I'm afraid they will laugh about my pain like it's a sport
I'm afraid of the things that I've left written down
I'm afraid of the sorrows in which I watch myself drown
I'm afraid that somebody is seeing the real me
I am vulnerable here and alone as can be
I'm afraid that my God isn't listening anymore
But I'm much more afraid that I've made his ears sore

I'm afraid to hold on
I'm afraid to let go
I'm afraid to tell the people
I fear what they already know
I'm afraid that I want too many things I can't have
I'm afraid to make myself into an *** and a half
I'm afraid that I'll hurt you
I'm afraid you'll hurt me back
I'm afraid I'll get caught doing what I don't know is bad
I'm afraid of my own journey, will I ever make it back?

(intentional music break)

I'm afraid to write down all of my silly fears
I'm afraid that I'll be in this same place in five years

I'm afraid of the world and the people that are in it
I'm afraid to start off and not be able to finish ****
I'm afraid to play it safe
I'm afraid to sin
I'm afraid of defeat
And I'm terrified to win

I'm afraid of my Mom's sickness taking her life
I'm afraid to be devoured by the same form of strife
I'm afraid if I get famous, it won't be enough
I'm afraid of all the money in the world calling my bluff
I'm afraid that no matter how much happiness I reach for
It won't be enough to repair the pain in my core
I'm afraid that I'm causing my family too much pain
I'm afraid that when I'm gone the world might move the same

I'm afraid that I'm crazy
Even more scared that I'm sane
I'm afraid to be afraid
I'm afraid to be brave

I'm afraid for the kids in this world that feel the same
I'm afraid to write these words down in front of my own face
I'm afraid that, out of fear, what I've written will be erased
For concern of others like me, that would be in poor taste...
So I'll let this one out and pray that I touch base
I'm afraid to be feared for the fact that I'm afraid.
*© Kateland Dwyer
also a song
Mahima Gupta Dec 2013
Afraid of the dark
Afraid of the shadows
Watching from behind
Afraid of the sparrows.

Afraid of the night,
Afraid of the flight.
Hiding behind the curtains,
Afraid of moonlight.

Afraid of the trees,
Afraid of the breeze.
He didnt like his place,
Afraid of the seas.

Afraid of the jaguar,
Afraid to go too far.
Hated the idea of living,
Afraid of the scars.

Afraid of the oceans,
Of the ships sailing by.
Afraid of the sunrise,
Also Afraid of the sky.

Afraid of the drums,
Afraid of the beats.
He told like liked competition but
Afraid to sow the seeds.

Afraid of the cross,
Afraid of the shine.
Hated to boast himself a lot
Afraid of the rhyme.

Afraid of the colours,
Afraid of the rainbow.
Colour blind he wishes he was
Afraid of the world .

Afraid of the melody,
Afraid of the songs.
Broken strings of the guitar,
Afraid of the strong.

Afraid of the screams,
Afraid of the dreams.
Wasn't sure of his abilities,
Afraid of the teams.

Afraid of the paradise,
Afraid to rise.
He wanted death,
Afraid of the lies.
Shadow Knight Apr 2015
Why are we afraid of the dark?
Doesn’t it happen at the end of every day?
Why are we scared of the dark?

Are we afraid because we cannot see? Are we afraid because we lose our most used sense? Is that why? Do we feel more vulnerable because we become weaker in the dark? More vulnerable to what though? are we afraid because we don't know what is out there? Is it because we can't see where anything is or could be? Are we afraid because we don't know anything in the dark? Are we afraid of not knowing? are we afraid of the possibilities of what could happen? Are we afraid of the unknown? If that is so why do we not seek to understand more so that we fear less? is it because we don't want to know? Are we afraid of the truth? Are we afraid of the light? No, no that can't be, could it? Are we afraid of having no light? Are we afraid of having no warmth? Are we afraid of the cold? Is the cold the feeling of not knowing? Are we afraid because we don't understand? Are we afraid to ask questions? Why? Are we afraid of the answers? Do we know the answers? Then what is the question? Are we afraid because we do not know the questions? Are we afraid to ask what the question is? What do we have to ask to learn the question? Do we not know what it is that we must learn to ask? Are we afraid to ask? Are we afraid to learn? Are we afraid to know? What is the question? Is it why are we afraid? Is it are we afraid? Why do we ask questions? Is it because we want answers? Why do we want answers? Is it because we want To know? Why do we want to know? Is it so we can ask? What do we want to ask? Is it what is our question? Is it the unknown? Is it what do we know? Are we afraid of what we do know? Are we afraid of the past? Is it the present?  Is it the future? Are we afraid of the end? Are we afraid of the beginning? Are we afraid of life? Are we afraid of our lives? Are we afraid of ourselves? Are we afraid of our fears? Why? Why do we fear what we do not know? Are we afraid of our questions? Are we scared that we don't know what we do not know? Are we afraid that we don't know our questions?

What are our questions?
Do we know our questions?
Do I know what is my question?
What is my question?

Why do we fear the dark?

My answer?

Yes.



Inspired by
The night and
The darkness known
As fear that we all hold in our hearts
cammy jude Feb 2014
I am afraid of being. I'm afraid to walk into a room and see people staring. When I talk, I'm afraid that I won't have control over what I'm saying. I'm afraid of being embarrassing. I'm afraid of looking at someone and I'm afraid of smiling. I'm afraid of touching, and kissing and all levels of intimacy. I'm afraid of loving and I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid of pushing people away, even though there's not many anyway. I'm afraid that when I look at someone amazing I'll fall madly in love and I'm afraid of anything changing. I'm afraid that no one cares or that I care too much or not enough. I'm afraid of always being sad and I'm afraid of never knowing how good it can be. I'm afraid of going to sleep, and I'm afraid of dreaming. I'm afraid that people aren't exactly what they seem. I'm afraid of choking, or drinking entirely. I'm afraid of dying. I'm afraid of what makes me happy more than what makes me upset. I'm afraid of getting angry, and afraid of being lazy. I'm afraid that I'm not perfect and I'm afraid that I'm stupid. I'm afraid no one will love me, and I'm afraid of being ugly. I'm afraid of laughing. I'm afraid of living.
Mike Hauser Apr 2014
I'm Afraid when I start this poem
From the moment that I begin
I'm Afraid I will get to the point
Where I won't be able to end

But here goes...

I'm Afraid of the darkness
I'm Afraid of the light
I'm Afraid that all my wrongs
Will never work out right

I'm Afraid that I will
I'm Afraid that I might
I'm Afraid that one day
I'll be asked the question why

I'm Afraid to inhale
and exhale the air that I breath
I'm Afraid of what is real
and what is make believe

I'm Afraid the colors are bleeding
In the Red, White, and the Blue
I'm Afraid of the ever increasing lies
Hidden inside of the decreasing truth

I'm Afraid of my neighbor
I'm Afraid of the neighbors dog
I'm Afraid that there's more to this
Ever growing cough

I'm Afraid to answer
The shrill ring of my telephone
I'm Afraid that the end
When it arrives will be a brick wall

I'm Afraid of this life
I'm Afraid of it's death
I'm Afraid of the thoughts
That keep bouncing in my head

I'm Afraid of you
I'm Afraid of me
I'm Afraid of what I can
and what I can not see

I'm Afraid of being Afraid
Which makes me more Afraid
I'm Afraid that one day
I'll run out of things to say
Which makes me even more Afraid
David Bojay Feb 2014
im afraid the sun doesnt wait for me in the morning
im afraid people will love me for the wrong reasons
im scared of people understanding art one day
im scared people will look at me and think of me as an ideal teen dreamer
im afraid the stars are just reflections of the people who are sad
im afraid my soul is decaying as i think of ways to save myself
im afraid to let go of my mothers hand during prayer
im afraid of speaking up to my preacher about the doubts ive written about the bible
im afraid people will find out what type of photgraphy i like
im afraid people will make fun of the music i listen to before i sleep
im afraid the government keeps track of my internet history
im afraid of falling in love with the devil
im afraid of wonders i could have never thought of
im afraid im just another one Gods children
im afraid im just another one of those puppets Lucifer controls
im afraid of the eyes i look into when i look at the mirror
im afraid of a lot of things
im afraid of my mom not coming home one day
im afraid churches are illusions of a peaceful place
im afraid the only peaceful place is your heart
im afraid the only safe place is between your arms
im afraid i only feel peace when im kissing you
im afraid to live
im afraid to die
im afraid of myself
yesterday night
Mike Hauser Dec 2014
I'm afraid of the above
More often than not enough

I'm afraid of the air that I breathe
I'm afraid that they're watching me

I'm afraid of going outside
Whether it's day or whether it's night

I'm afraid of the lurking shadow
Especially if it's my own

I'm afraid of the very fact
Of the courage that I lack

I'm afraid of getting sick
Cause I'm afraid of the medicine

I'm afraid of the outcome
Before I've even begun

I'm afraid I may be too late
Which makes me more afraid

I'm afraid that if I had one
I might lose it and then I'd have none

I'm afraid that you may find
What it is that I'm really like

And I'm afraid that once you do
That you'll be afraid too
Jenni Feb 2015
You asked me what I was so afraid of
And reached out your hand
An offering
As if you could possibly shield me from my fears
What am I afraid of?
I'm afraid of everything.

I'm afraid of people
And I'm afraid of being alone
I'm afraid of ordering food
And eating in public
I'm afraid of vague responses
That can be in any way construed as hostile or unhappy

I'm afraid of not living my life
I'm afraid of living

I'm afraid of calculus
And when I don't understand something on the first try

I'm afraid of unrequited love
Both given and received
I'm afraid of disappointing others
And letting down those who are counting on me
I'm afraid of love
I'm afraid of the feeling of my heart clenching in on itself
Whenever I think about you

I'm afraid of being tortured
Physically
But I consistently torture myself mentally

I'm afraid of the fact that we're hurtling through a universe
That we know nothing about
I'm afraid of the possibility that we're alone in it
Or that we're not

I'm afraid of making too much noise
Or drawing attention to myself
Taking up too much space on public transit
Of making eye contact with a stranger
And seeing myself reflected in their eyes
I'm sure they don't like what they see
Because neither do I

I'm afraid of losing
And loss
And failure
And any other synonym thereof

I'm afraid of sleeping my life away
But I'm afraid to wake up

I'm afraid of the ocean
And boats
And bridges
I'm afraid of deep water
And its depths are the best analogy for uncertainty there ever was
And maybe that's what I'm most afraid of

No.
That's not quite right is it?
What I fear most is my constant companion
Who I can only glimpse in reflective surfaces
Spitting out her constant criticism
Not enough
Never enough

She spends her days whispering in my ear
Of all the things I have to fear
Lauren Upadhyay Feb 2012
I am afraid.
Afraid that I will lose you
To the merciless entropy of the Universe,
Or to the inexorable mystery of God’s plan,
Call it whatever you want, but whatever it is
I am afraid that it will take you from me at any moment,
And that I will be alone again.

I am afraid.
Afraid that every moment with you will be the last,
And our last shared experience will be an insignificant goodbye,
And that will be the last memory I have of you.
That is why I insist on physical contact, because
It reassures me that you’re real and
I am afraid that if I don’t constantly remind myself
I will forget what you felt like,
And then I will forget what we felt like.

I am afraid.
Afraid that I will lose you and not remember you,
That I will feel an unbearable and aching emptiness
And not know why.
I am afraid of fading memories,
As they suggest an essential futility in the beautiful endeavor
That was us.
They suggest that we is incapable of being constant,
That we is merely a rotation of the stone
As it continues its mossless journey to the sea.

I am afraid.
Afraid that in losing we I will lose a part of myself
And remain forever broken and immutably unwhole,
Unable to put myself back together because
My pieces are missing.
I am afraid that we is an essential part of me,
And that I will never recover from the loss.

I am afraid of losing you and afraid of losing me.
I am afraid of being alone and afraid of being broken.

I am afraid that we will lose we and
Then nothing will ever be okay again.

I am afraid.
I am afraid.
I am afraid.
Morgan Dec 2013
I'm afraid of losing you
I'm afraid that I already have
I'm afraid that if I never had you
I'd fade away from day to day
In a consistent stream of apathy
I'm afraid of the dryness in my throat
every morning at five am
I'm afraid of the cigarette between my fingers
an hour later
I'm afraid of the quivering in my hands
When I run out of coffee
I'm afraid of my closet
I'm afraid of the sizes in my clothes
I'm afraid of the way my friends think
I'm afraid that they don't think at all
I'm afraid of the drugs in their cabinets
I'm afraid of the drugs in their veins
I'm afraid of the silent pain that is too often
conveyed in a stranger's eye
I'm afraid of the people I work for
I'm afraid that they don't know how to love
I'm afraid of love
I'm afraid of my bedroom
I'm afraid of every man who's slept in it
I'm afraid of the people who
don't have the things they need
Equally afraid of the ones that have everything
They want
I'm afraid that nothing out here is right
I'm afraid that I made it that way
And I'm afraid that this fear
Just isn't enough to make me change my ways
it was never enough
anotherdream Jan 2018
Afraid of staying up too late,
Only half of the bed always awake.
Afraid of pain that haunts me daily,
When I’m full of joy and tired of saying,

“Help me out, hear all my words.”
“Show me your love, show me your worth.”
Afraid of the effects of waiting too long,
Afraid of how I’m ultimately wrong,

When I tell her my feelings,
And realize they’re only nothing.
Afraid of opinions and ultimately running,
Never to experience the lost, feel the shunning.

Afraid of lying to myself,
Never knowing of the wealth,
Following with pure confidence.
Leaving my brain to rot, to be haunted.

Afraid of my empty body lying,
Filling the bed with tears of my crying.
Afraid of looking up and not at her face,
Overflowing with rain, abundant with grace.

Afraid of losing to death,
Replying with no instead of yes.
Afraid of actions, afraid of myself,
Holding the cards that I shouldn’t have dealt.

Afraid of smoke and fire,
Filling my lungs, igniting my wires.
Afraid of depravity attached with debt.
All my love was lost long ago when I bet,

Everything I had and now is forever gone,
Afraid of desolation after completing my song.
Afraid of breaking free after the storm,
Only to realize love is nevermore.

Afraid of the cruelty, afraid of the pain,
Making mistakes but having no gain.
Afraid of gas, afraid of the flame,
Poisoning wrath, scorching rain.

Afraid of destined deception,
Losing sight, losing perception.
Not expecting achievement,
Not searching for perfection.
Why is fear so powerful?
Marco Jimenez Mar 2010
i am not afraid of crashing in a plane
i am not afraid of drowning in the rain

i am not afraid of gangsters in the night
i am not afraid of bullies or a fight

i am not afraid of burning in a fire
i am not afraid of electricution by wire

i am afraid that my last words will be i wish i had
i am afraid that in my lifetime
i will have done less good than bad

i am afraid of my brother going to war
i am afraid that when he leaves
ill wish i had loved him more

i am afraid of not giving enough to those i love
i am afraid of not giving all that i can give
i am afraid of dying
knowing ill only be remembered for all the bad things i did

i am afraid that nobody will care when i'm gone
i am afraid that life wont be very long
i am afraid of being forgotten as easily as a song
i am afraid of never knowing what i did wrong

i am afraid that my life will have never made a difference
i am afraid of my loved ones hurting for even one day
i am afraid of their hope fading away
i am afraid of their life and love going a different way
SW May 2015
1) I am afraid of silent waiting rooms because I’ve never learned how to be alone with myself.
2) I am afraid of not being good enough because I’ve been told that these days, good isn’t enough. 

3) I am afraid of still being on the first question while the rest of the class turns their exams in.
4) I am afraid of walking to the bus station too slowly, and having to desperately sprint at the end to catch up.
5) I am afraid of indecision. The only thing worse than making a wrong decision is being the coward who didn’t make one at all. 

6) I am afraid of being lazy, so lazy that my suicide will be a pack a day and an unbuckled seatbelt.
7) I am afraid of how fast you are going, and

8) I am afraid of you leaving me behind.

9) I am afraid of being weak – of taking twice as long to wait for the elevator instead of just taking the stairs.
10) I am afraid of failure; more importantly, I am afraid of those unbearable seconds of silence that come afterward.

11) I am afraid of believing wholly and completely in eternal sunshine because I won't have an umbrella when I need one and

12) I am afraid of asking to borrow your extra umbrella.

13) I am afraid of good-old-fashion bad luck because can it make the rest of my fear arbitrary anxiety. 

14) I am afraid of saying, “I miss you, I love you, please stay longer this time…”

15) I am afraid of naivety because nothing is ever said without a reason. 

16) I am afraid of overestimating myself because someone once told me you see yourself as ten times more beautiful than you actually are.

17) I am afraid of giving my love to those who do not deserve it because they will not give theirs back to me.  

18) I am afraid of wasting my time, because I do not have time to waste.
19) I am afraid of limiting myself. God knows there is always more I could be doing. Should be doing.

20) I am afraid of being honest. Honest like children. Honest like poetry.
It feels good to write them down
Krusty Aranda Dec 2017
Today I live in fear

I woke up afraid of the same pillow that comforted me last night
It felt as if my dreams had been soaked up by it
My thoughts dripping out of my ear, one by one, dampening the cloth with which it's covered
My bed wanted me to stay, to lay away forever
Prevent me from going anywhere, pulling me towards it
I was a discarded piece of metal being pulled by the giant magnet that would take me to the dumpster to be crushed next to my scrap brethren
I am afraid of the wind blown from my fan
The cold on my skin burns as my sheets hold me tightly in place
I'm afraid to get out, to step on the floor, one foot at a time
To sit up and gag
To stand up and throw up all the regret, the unspoken words, the tears I so cowardly saved to myself for all these years
The 9 beers and 1 tequila shot
I'm afraid to text you
I'm afraid there will be no reply, the silence, the distance
What is said and what is not
What I know, what you won't fix
I'm afraid of losing this game
I'm afraid of playing my next hand, to look at the cards I've been dealt and find nothing other than hopelessness at the lack of anything good
I'm afraid to write this poem, to let my words gang up on me, and beat me up mercilessly as I can only type on and cry out your name
I'm afarid I won't be here tomorrow
I'm afraid you won't
I'm afraid to be here right now, as I was afraid yesterday
Afraid of the new year
Afraid of our Christmas dinner
Afraid of us, of everyone, of no one
I'm afraid of being alive, dancing in this graveyard of broken dream, of complaints and looking at the floor unable to gaze upon my very own dissapointments
I'm afraid to admit I am worthless, but also afraid to do anything about it
I'm afraid to be everything you were looking for, and missing the mark completely
I'm afraid that I'll hurt you, and that I commited a sin I don't regret
Like Jesus I hang nailed to my own cross by the acts I commited and ommited, while words spurt out of my wonds and into this text screen, as I terrifyingly try to tell myself, it will be ok
I'm afraid it will be ok

Today I live in fear
But I guess I live
Omnis Atrum Aug 2012
Don’t think I’m trying to make or break you spirit
Just giving you a thought from my soul, if you would only hear it,
I can’t fully express (or repress) exactly what it is I think
So I babble incoherently and leave my decision on the brink.
I can’t decide if I should drop my pride and let the words flow
But a fear far worse rises of sad surprises and having to let you go,
So I stand back though I feel you close and I try to leave you be
But I know I can’t conceal or forget the words you’ve said to me.
So let me know (or find a way to show) exactly what I should do
But know as soon as I leave I find myself lost without you,
If you could just see a glimpse or peek for just a second of my mind
And what’s inside then you would know all thoughts for you are kind.
Only protecting (but not correcting) when I think I should step in
Because I’ve been in the same place and I’ve felt that hurt, my friend,
And I don’t want anyone to feel a pain so real, especially not you
Ignoring potential ulterior motives you know every word I say is true.
I swear without err that I couldn’t miss you more when you’re not here
But I’m fighting back fears when you’re holding me near whispering secrets in my ear,
And I’ve told you truly you hold more beauty that all of the stars in the night
Though you show it, I guess you don’t know it, or this knowledge you seem to fight.
(Who could forget her covered in glitter with sweet revenge in her eyes?)
But you’ve got this kid confused and blurry no matter how hard I try
To figure you out, your words still seem like an undecipherable code
That I try to map out and reconstruct in an abstract uneven ode.
I’m not playing, only saying that whether my words seep through or not
That you need not fear, because I’ll be here, my promise I haven’t forgot,
And when it ends, as it inevitably will, and you feel nothing but hurt and pain
I’ll soften my tone, and tell you you’re never alone, and you’re safe in my arms again.

A lifetime of waiting in wonder if you were really true
A trillion seconds of wishing my worries I could subdue,
Countless nights spent praying that you would become real to me
But a moment in your arms and worries are but a distant memory.

I have spent the greater portion of my life searching for a person that has certain distinguishable qualities. I have often been told that my standards were unreachable. I have spent years defining unconditional love, the difference between love and infatuation, and in general what love is. I was not until I met you that I was able to distinguish one emotion from another figure out what I had been missing all along. Since I met you I now know that love is:

When their heartbeat reverberates inside your very soul. When you find the answers to all of the questions of the world inside their eyes. When the only desire that you have is to fulfill all of their desires. When your body trembles at its inability to contain all of the emotions that are trying to burst forth from within you. When their voice sounds sweeter than any angelic melody could ever desire to. When you are dreaming of them and upon waking you try as hard as you can to get back to sleep because you cannot wait until you actually get to see them again. When they are the first thing that you think of in the morning and the last thing that you think about before going to sleep. When you try so hard to conceal how you are lost in bliss when you see them smile. When every touch and caress makes your heart race faster than you thought possible. When you wish you could lose yourself for an eternity in every kiss. When every day spent with them passes by in a moment and you find yourself wishing you were with them again. When your biggest fear is waking up and not finding them next to you. When your greatest desire is to hold them close. When all of the great problems of the world become minor details. When you search constantly for a stronger word because you know that love could not possibly encompass everything that you feel. When you know in your heart that you could drown in a single tear that they cried. When you would give up everything else just to hear them say "I love you" and know that they meant it. When you know that there is no one else in the world more beautiful than the person you hold dear. When you cannot help but smile when you think back on the memories you have made.  When you plan out every moment of that special day just so it will be as memorable as possible to them. When the only reason that you have left to fear death is that you would be without them. When you know that to hurt them would be the greatest crime that you could ever commit. When you realize that these words do not do justice to the meaning behind them.

Yet…even though those words cannot fully express how I truly feel…I still use them for lack of a way to show you to a further extent.

I love you. I love your kisses. Your smile. When you tell me that all that matters is us. That the rest of the world could fall apart and as long as we have each other that we'll be fine. That little thing you do when you think no one is looking. The way you lay there and stare at me for hours on end. Not needing to say anything. The way you smile because you know that it makes me happy, even if you don't want to. The way you call me just to see what I’m up to...even if you already know. The way you act surprised even if I’ve ******* up and you already know what's going to happen. The way that you look so innocent when you lay there sleeping. The way you laugh at me when I’m acting ******* just so I won't feel bad. That look you give me. The way that we argue about who loves who more. The stupid things we do when we're bored. The way that you make me feel complete. The way you hold me so tightly. The way you make me feel like I’m the one protecting you instead of the other way around. How it seems like I’m not alone when you're here. How you pour out your soul because you know I won't ever use any of it against you. The love you give, the hope you continue, the happiness you sustain.

A thousand thoughts of you are but a sand in time
but those thoughts of you are always in my mind,
Swirling slowly, completely through, even to my soul
and these fragments of thoughts of you are what makes me whole.
I piece them all together as hard as it may be
so I can remember every moment since you said yes to me,
And as I get lost in these memories deep in my heart’s core
I think in bliss of how in time there will be so many more.
I piece my life together like a puzzle full of truth
but the puzzle now can make no sense without the thought of you,
The only time I’m more confused is when I’m lost within your eyes
Because I’m lost within the one that I love to be beside.
I have eternal comfort when I’m holding you tight
But even that eternity must end when I let you go at night,
And even though I leave alone, I leave with a smile
Because I know before I see you again, it will only be a while.
The happiness you’ve brought to me this poem cannot explain
Because even now I can’t tell you how much I’ve gained,
Ever since that night when you said that you’d be mine
So I just wanted to let you know that I have the best valentine.

puzzles are easily put together, codes are easily deciphered, riddles are easily solved, questions are easily answered. the things created by the mind of man can be easily solved by the mind of man. it is only the questions that words cannot be found for that cannot be answered.

if a heart could cry out in an audible tone then i am afraid that i would go deaf from the constant murmur that would be produced from the depths of my chest. if love was an object i am afraid that i would tuck mine away forever so that such an irreplacable treasure would not become worn with time. if time could stop itself i am afraid where i would be found when it did so. if sleep could lash out and attack me for ignoring it for so long i am afraid that it would never cease its assault. if errors made were corporeal then i am afraid that i would lock them away forever in an inescapable prison to never be seen again. if my apologies grew limbs i am afraid they would die from exhaustion from constantly running from my heart to your ears. if my desire could be contained i am afraid no container would be found capable of storing such a great mass. if it was possible for me to find that which i seek i am afraid that it would dissolve and leave me without the one that none can replace. if i could tell you everything that i feel i am afraid that you would think me truly mad. if all my fears dissolved i am afraid that i would have nothing left to run from and would be found standing still. if i should be found standing still i am afraid that i would give all i have to give. and if i gave my all i am afraid that it would all be for nought and i would be found where i once was, without...

my father recently told me that i run from everything. i follow some "run and gun" pattern as he described it. he does not know how right he truly was. i could not explain it to him just as much as i cannot fully explain it to myself. but to put it simply...i fear. i fear love because i fear that it will always end as it has in the past. i fear confrontation because in the end someone always ends up hurt. i fear sleep because i cannot control the dreams that are created by my own mind. i fear hope because i am afraid that i will be disappointed. i fear my emotions because i am afraid that they will become greater than what i can control. i fear closeness because distance will inevitably set in. i fear looking into your eyes because you may see how i truly feel. that you may feel sympathy, that you may look down on me for admitting what is known to be true but never stated, that you will see how much you have helped me through what i could not do on my own, that you will see through my eyes and into my soul and be overwhelmed.

and though i fear many things, and though because i cannot often be found because i run from all those things which i do fear, there are some things that i have never feared and i doubt i ever shall. i have never feared your voice. i have never feared being with you. i have never feared losing what we have developed through the years. i have never feared that anything will ever come between us. i have never feared that the love i feel for you should ever subside. i have always given you my heart in whole because there is no fear that you will ever break it. and though i know that i have never nor will ever find a greater friend than you i do not fear that i should ever have to search for another. in a poem that i once wrote to you the words "all i have ever wanted, but more than i could ask for" still stand true. you mean the world to me. and if you were not here i have no idea where i would be right now. i just wanted to thank you for being there for me through everything that i've gone through. you have brought light to a once dim heart. you are the only proof that i need that there are those out there deserving all that i have.

these words mean nothing without the meaning behind them.

smile love, just smile. i will make you the happiest woman in the world. i will give you everything that you've ever wanted. i will make you forget the entities of sadness and regret. i will love you and you will love me, i'll make you lose yourself in the everlasting bliss, never leave you without a smile. i'll leave you wondering how you lived your life before now. he will fill your head with empty promises...

in time i have come to learn that love is a many faceted colossus. and depending on the angle of approach and point of view you can see many different things in it. that is why most people view love in different ways. it's not that their love is less true, it's just they have been one of the unfortunates that has been led to view love from the wrong perspective. finding love is easy if you approach it from one of the more easily accessible viewpoints. but if you work at it hard enough you can gain a vantage point that shows you the true beauty of love. the whole of this gargantuan emotional construct will be within your heart and mind. and once you have conquered the understanding of this which some might call an obstacle you can share what you have learned and teach those who were so unfortunate to not achieve what you have achieved. because although each facet complicates the next, and every love is different, is the goal not always the same? to extend your boundaries of happiness with another past what you could accomplish by yourself.

...and when you are left unhearted wondering why this love has collapsed upon itself. i will simply tell you that you saw love as a simple emotion when it was really a complicated goliath. and as you cannot build wonders out of empty boxes, you cannot build love with nothing but empty promises.

and there was a man. the frigid chill of winter blew behind him pushed him forward into the warm embrace that stood before him. and he knew that never again would he be able to turn around and face the cold void that he had left behind. he would never be able to follow the trail of frozen tears to find what he had once called his own on the other side of the blizzard. once he had found his way out of the storm he knew that he would never again have to feel such pain, such numbness. but the warm embrace that held him now made him forget all of those things. because that from which he came was so cold the warmness he now felt was euphoric. it lit a spark in his eye and caused him to glow. and of this fact alone he is forever grateful.

All i want is to be with you
but i don't know how to let you know,
if somehow you found out and knew
all my worries and fears would go.
If the wind would whisper in your ear
this secret that i'm forced to keep,
and all of it you could hear
so much pressure would be lifted off of me.
My unease to tell has filled me with disbelief
usually it is so easy for me to throw it all way,
but your friendship I do want to keep
and I can't find the way to tell you today.
I can't just let go like times before
there's something about you that makes me care,
I feel like this is something more
but with you this secret i can't share.
maybe i'm afraid you might shy away
or I'll just ***** everything up again,
but if i ever found out that you would stay
I'd break down and tell you right then.
All I want is to be with you
but I don't know how to let you know,
If somehow you found out and knew
new fears would come when the old ones go.

when you lay there staring up at me i realize
that i can almost see your soul through your eyes,
i can see all your desires that i'm trying to ignore
because i'm so afraid you'll say "don't hold me anymore".
the love i feel for you will surely outlast the world
but in this love there is no lust even as our bodies were curled,
i  just want to hold you and know that you are near
to move any further than this would again spark the fear.
my mind was running in circles as we laid there so long
so confused, so petrified, so afraid to do something wrong,
but even though these feelings were welling up inside of me
every time you smiled i felt nothing but relief.
knowing that you were there sheltered me from all that i hide
and hearing "i love you too" makes me forget what i've been denied,
makes me forget all but the wholeness that i feel when i'm with you
so whole because i know and feel that every word you say is true.
So here's to a friend that i know i never will forget
and not letting love and closeness turn into regret,
here's to the emotions for her that i can no longer store
she's everything i've ever wanted, but more than i could ask for.

Yesterday I knew the answers to all the problems on my mind
as you layed there trying to keep from falling asleep,
I found myself looking forward and not behind
and sharing these secrets i thought i would always keep.
But I must have stirred too much or breathed too hard
because your eyes slowly opened up again
and i knew the feelings i felt i no longer had to disregard
as you, as if lost in dream, looked into my eyes, my friend.
You sitting there so beautiful, a smile crossed your face
I knew there was no concealing the smile on my own
in this complete comfort that i know i can't replace
no mat
NitaAnn Aug 2014
I deal with fear nearly every single moment that I'm awake.
My past has left me a very fearful present.

I am also afraid and that feels very different.
  To me, being afraid is the current not directly tied to my past.  

Just a side effect.

Afraid of being fragile.
  Afraid of being pitied.
  Afraid of being angry.
  Afraid of being mean.
  Afraid of failing in school.
  Afraid of being abandoned.
Afraid of my husband leaving.
  Afraid of losing everything because I can never grip it tight enough.


I try to wrap my arms around Afraid
because I cannot hold it all in my hands.
  But then a tremor wiggles through my hand.
  And then it works its way up my arm.
  My shoulder shudders.
  My head twitches.
  The other shoulders rolls as my other hand is paralyzed.
  I am limp and worthless to contain Afraid.

Afraid tells me that I'm doing this all wrong.
  That I'm not healing right.
  Good enough.
  Fast enough.  

I am afraid of Afraid.
Maria Rodriguez Oct 2013
I'm afraid to get close to you
I'm afraid to open up to you
I'm afraid to let you in
I'm afraid that when I wake up
       you won't be there
I'm afraid this was all just a dream
I'm afraid that this was real
I'm afraid that you'll realize
       you can do so much better
I'm afraid to let you see the real me
I'm afraid I won't be good enough
I'm afraid you'll leave me
       and take my heart with you
I'm afraid to hold you close but
I'm also afraid to let you go
I'm afraid of it all
But mostly
I'm afraid I'll never meet you
I'm afraid you don't exist
I'm so afraid
4/24/13
Valerie Feb 2011
It's like a laugh in the dark
Imposing and oppressive
Even if just a giggle
You're afraid.

And in the dark you're alone
Depressed and distraught
Even if you aren't crying
You're afraid.

Because darkness is the unknown
And no one likes to tread it lightly
Even if you're with someone
You're afraid.

In the dark means no control
And no control means vulnerability
Even if you're not alone
You're afraid.

You're crying on the inside
Because you don't want the darkness to see your tears
Or the person next to you because
You're afraid.

But eventually the heavy weight
Of darkness and loneliness on your shoulders
Will cause you to concave because
You're afraid.

Tell yourself to be not afraid
Because darkness is natural
It's light we create
Be not afraid.

I'll pull you out of this darkness
Because the laughter is my own
And grasping my hand I realize I'm saving myself
Am I afraid?

Even when everyone is lending you a hand
The only one you'll take is your own
Because like a lion you have your pride
You are afraid-- I am afraid.

The darkness is your fear
And it rules and haunts your world
But you've not allowed it to collapse on your shoulders
You're not afraid now, are you?

Because light we create
But when created it shines in the dark
And then you can see your path before you
I'm not afraid.

I'm not afraid
I'm not afraid
Of myself
Any longer.
SSK<3  AKA: Valerie Garcia
holyoak Dec 2014
are you afraid of parking garages
do you think of empty parking spaces
with empty cars beside them
like your own compartmentalized mind
do the empty spaces scare you
like my own scare me
are you afraid of the dust
are you afraid of the ghosts
sitting where people once were
are you afraid of parking garages
are you afraid of the lonely silence
are you afraid of the concrete walls
that are more solid than anything
that you have ever created
are you afraid 
that you'll be just as cold
just as lifeless
are you afraid of parking garages
are you afraid of where they take you
are you afraid of the airports 
that you always end up in
missing those that never come back
are you afraid of parking garages
are you afraid that you'll park 
and that you'll never leave
are you afraid of parking garages
are you afraid of the flickering lights
and your own shadow 
bouncing in front you
are you afraid of going somewhere 
and never coming home
are you afraid of your home
and when they asked you where home is
did you stutter 
because you almost said someone's name
instead of a place
or is your home that parking garage
blank and grey 
empty and hollow
are you afraid of parking garages

[holyoak]
jake aller Mar 29
Corona Virus Poems


Index
The virus from hell is amused
End of the World
Every Day I Turn on the New
Irony Meters Blow Gaskets
Chaos
Corona Virus Fears Tanka
My Phobias Overwhelm Me
Fear Fills the Air
Is this the best we can get?
More Trouble Every Day
by pass the alarms spreading across the land
corona cinqku
Taking a Walk in the Corona Era
A lone man stands in an empty parking lot
hell of a world we live in ain’t it?
Pause for a moment amidst the media madness
I feel as if the whole world needs to be cancelled
The Virus King Cried
Bring out your dead
the Virus Came From Hell
The Delivery System of the Virus is Round
the corona virus is testing us all
the call goes out
the horsemen begin to ride
nature spirits revolts against humanity
Last Human on Island
Corona Virus Haiku
the virus came from hell
bring out your dead cries
Be Afraid  haiku
Death Comes Knocking
the virus from Hell haiku



the Virus from Hell is amused
the Virus from Hell is amused
laughing at the world’s panicked reaction
as it marches through the world unabated
infecting everyone in its wake
as the world awaits its fate
the virus smiles he ain’t no fake
he is the real deal
he is death itself
he is the end of the world
the grim reaper is smiling
god is silent as usual
the world’s leaders
dither and rather
as the economy craters
everyone hoping that God
will save them
the virus does not care
insults and orders do not work
the virus simply does its virus thing
infecting everyone it encounters
and thousands will die
equal opportunity offender
killing the rich and the poor alike
but more poor people
just so many more poor people
than the few billionaires
the virus smile
his work is done
and mankind is doomed
so be it the virus thinks




that is the way of the world
and the virus is the new king
of the world

End of the World
end of world
the fears world-wide
soon find us dead
bring out the dead
ll the dead die
death lies here there
there goes here
as death here comes
soon here death comes


Every Day I Turn on the News
debunking the bioweaapon conspiracy theories
every day I turn on the news
nothing but news about the virus
the virus from hell
the world is filled with fear
and my anxiety levels rise
every time I turn on the news
oh my god I say
we are all going to die
and I am so afraid
afraid of everyone
afraid of everything
dreading the latest news
and nothing relieves my fear
I watch the world
loosing its collective mind
wondering how much more of this
can  we all take
I scream out
Dear God save us all
god is silent as usual
and so I realized
we are doomed
perhaps it is the end times
perhaps not
I turn off the TV
try to stay calm
hoping the madness
will not overwhelm us all


Irony Meters Blow Gaskets
the Irony meter gasket
is blown again and again
with every statement
of our chaos president
and his endless surrogates
promoting the latest Presidential
on spot guidance by our great leader
that must be true
because our dear leader
says it is so
The President accuses his democratic rival
of being senile and needs to be in home
and will be run by his radical left allies
and the right wing media
echoes the presidential absurd comments
refusing to acknowledge
that the president himself
is rapidly fading into dementia
and his radical right cronies
are looting the government
driving out expertise
even in the midst of pandemic
Oh  yeah the irony meters
are blowing gaskets
every single day

Chaos
the world descends into chaos
as our world leaders
led by the chaos president
are overwhelmed
by the smallest
enemy of all
a simple virus
straight out of hell
blows through the crumbling
third world public health infrastructure
living proof of the decline of America
and no one is prepared
and panic ensures
with every Presidential tweet
as people don’t believe
a word he says
conspiracy rumors spread
everyone believes their own reality
as the world spins out of control
the chaos king is in his element
convince that only he knows
the deal
and everyone else
is iust a bit player
in the reality show
that he presides over
and so the rest of us
hunker down
just hoping for the best
as the panic and
chaos spreads faster
than the virus
are we doomed
can we survive
will God save us?
he is silent as always

Corona Virus Fears Tanka
Corona virus
lurking fears all around me
we all will die
the TV screaming nonstop
Must be afraid be afraid

My Phobias Overwhelm Me
lately I have become scared
of everything
the news scares me, the corona virus scares me, the presidential race scares me, fears of gun men in the street, terrorism, fears of getting sick, fears of dogs, fears of other people, fear of loosing money, fears of becoming demented old man, lost in his nightmares on the street just another invisible homeless *** in the end of his life
all these phobias overwhelm me
time to walk away from my fears
and realize
it will be alright
everything will be alright
As long as I have you
by my side

Fear Fills the Air

watching the news
CNNMSNBCFOXBBCKOREANNEWSJAPANESENEWSBLOOMBERABCCBSNBCGOOGLEA­PPLEREUTERSAPIRUSSIANTVCHINESTVFRENCHTV
blather on and on
the world is ending
pandemic is coming
we are going to die
and the fear grows
and the restrictions grow
travel comes to stop
the economy comes to  a stop
everyone is so afraid
our leaders fret
say that everything is fine
as the world enters
the second great depression
and we are faced
with the reality
all over the world
idiots in high places
the masters of the universe
are in charge
the internet spreads
the wildest rumors
must be true
I read it on the internet
the truth is lost
in the shuffle
no one believes anyone
everything thinks
that they know
it is all a conspiracy
the thought comes to mind
we are all so ’S….
end of the world
is upon us

is this the best we can get?
watching the news
one wonders
how in this great country
of ours
335 million people
among the most educated
richest people in the world
we can end up
with such idiots in high places
running out country?
these idiots in charge
no disrespect intended
both political parties
all corporations
and our institutions
except maybe the military
has been infected
by this virus
of epic incompetence
greed and indifference
to the general good
who loudly constantly proclaim
that they are Christians
while violating
all of Christ's teachings
Jesus if he came back
would scream out
I am not Christian
it is all about me
and mine
and you can go
to hell
if you dare to disagree
and so we tweet and titter
and watch the news
reading the latest rumors
and I wonder
if there is a god
or if there is a devil
and are we overwhelmed
by the dismal news
why can’t we have better
leaders
better people
in our leaders
around the world
has god abandoned us
are we in hell
or did god ever exist
except in our fevered imagination
will god save us all
or will the world
just go around the sun
indifferent to our pleas?
no answer
must watch the news
consumed by the need
to see the latest news
and so it goes
and I wake up
the sun is up
and the nightmares
fade away
until I watch the news
and the madness consumes
us all again and again
as the corona virus
marches on and on
consuming us all
as the world falls apart
these must be the end times
I hope I will be raptured away
even if I am not a Christian

More Trouble Every Day
The Old Zappa song plays
on in my head
every time I turn on the news
and see more trouble every day
no one can delay
the trouble coming every day
Frank Zappa died too soon
before the horrors of the Trump era
and the corona end of the world plague
that he would have foreseen
if he had lived on
he was truly a prophet
crying in the wildness
while making money
as an over night sensation
as he saw the slime
oozing out of the TV sets
we will do what we are told
for the rights to us have been sold
And Jesus too
has been sold
to the highest bidder
nothing but a business deal
in America
the land of the constant deal
and so I turn off the TV
and realize that
the torture never ends
the torture never ends

Trouble Every Day
more trouble every day  Frank Zappa
Well I'm about to get sick
From watchin' my TV
Been checkin' out the news
Until my eyeballs fail to see
I mean to say that every day
Is just another rotten mess
And when it's gonna change, my friends
Is anybody's guess
So I'm watchin' and I'm waitin'
Hopin' for the best
Even think I'll go to prayin'
Every time I hear 'em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
Wednesday I watched the riot...
I seen the cops out on the street
Watched 'em throwin' rocks and stuff
And chokin' in the heat
Listened to reports
About the whisky passin' 'round
Seen the smoke & fire
And the market burnin' down
Watched while everybody
On his street would take a turn
To stomp and smash and bash and crash
And slash and bust…

The Torture Never Stops
Frank Zappa
torture never stops
Flies all green and buzzin'
In this dungeon of despair
Prisoners grumblin
**** they clothes
Scratch their matted hair
A tiny light from a window-hole
Hundred yards away
That all they ever get to know
'Bout the regular life in the day
'Bout the regular life in the day
Slime and rot and rats and snuck
***** on the floor
Fifty ugly soldier men
Holdin' spears by the iron door
Stinks so bad, stones are chokin'
Weepin' greenish drops
In the den where
The giant fire puffer works
And the torture never stops
The torture never stops, torture
The torture never stops
The torture never stops
Flies all green and buzzin'
In this dungeon of despair
An evil prince eats a steamin' pig
In a tumbers right near there
In the chambers right near there
He eats de snouts an trotters first!…


by pass the alarms spreading across the land
to bypass the alarms spreading across the land
the circuit breakers are breaking down
as the alarms go on and on
with the end of the world
the end days approaching
spreading the alarm far and wide

corona cinqku
corona
it came from hell
we must be all prepared
meet God


Taking a Walk in the Corona Era
every day I go for a walk
in the spring time woods
near my house
braving the weather
and the dreaded corona virus
wearing masks and gloves
keeping a distance
from anyone we encounter
that is life it seems
in the era of the corona virus
when will it end
no one knows
until then
I will brave the viral threat
and confront my fears
and walk in the park
with the love of my life
my bride my wife
by my side
in these challenging times
that is all we can do

A lone man stands in an empty parking lot

contemplating the new normal
social distancing run amuck
as fears of the corona super plague
plague the land
driving everyone inside
sheltering in place
afraid to go out
afraid of the deadly c virus

It is a hell of a world we live in ain’t it?
It is a hell of a world we live in ain’t it?
said the old man to me
sitting on a bench
in the park in the woods
as we both sought shelter
from the spreading chaos
the pandemic swirling around us
Yes I said
standing up
to enforce the proper distance
between us
don’t want to give the virus a chance
to spread between us
he smiled and said
relax I already went through it
I am fine and you will too

Pause for a moment amidst the media madness
Pause for a moment amidst the media madness
All around us fears and chaos
Unlike the end of the world approaching us
Sadness overcomes us dooming us to our fate
Every we go nothing but death awaits

I feel as if the whole world needs to be cancelled
I feel as if the whole worldneeds to be canceled
due to rough times ahead
due to the corona madness
and the thread of pure craziness
that it inspires in us all

The Virus King Cried

the virus king smiled
as the politicians lied
saying that the end was near
the virus king infected thousands more
and killed hundreds of people
the virus king sneered
as people panicked
and partied on the beach
the virus king infected thousands more
and killed hundreds of people
the virus king laughed
as the markets crashed
millions became unemployed
the virus king infected thousands more
and killed hundreds of people
the virus king roared
as the world slid into chaos
people turning on one another
the virus king infected thousands more
and killed hundreds of people
the virus king smirked
knowing that there was nothing
that they could do to stop
his army from infecting millions
and killing thousands
the virus King begin to realize
that soon there would be no one left
no one for his army to infect
as everyone was dying
the virus King yelled
remaining defiant
as civilization collapsed
billions were infected
millions died
the Virus King at last cried
when he saw that he was defeated
as one by one
people began to recover
and his reign of terror came to an end

Bring out your dead
the call bring out your dead
spreads around the world
as millions die
all over the world
the virus has spread
mutated and killed
all over the world
bring out your dead
the mournful cries
echoing in the wind
of the dying cities
mass starvation
as no is working
in the fields
as more people die
and the world spins
around the sun
with the politicians lying
and the dead still dying
as civilization dies
and humanity flee
into the wilderness
chased by the killer virus
straight down to hell

the Virus Came From Hell
the virus came from hell
straight out of a mad lab
born and raised in China
the virus spread from Dinah
all over to carolina
it spread from the lab
the mad virus of Hell
was mad as hell at humans
who it blamed for everything
seeing itself as cleansing everything
killing the world and everything
revenge against humans
perhaps virus came from God
more likely came from Satan
part of natures’ revenge
all designed to avenge
the damage to Stonehenge
virus came from Satan

The Delivery System of the Virus is Round
the delivery system of the virus is round
very simple system
the virus spreads around
and all must pay the price
death and destruction

the corona virus is testing us all

the corona virus
is testing us all
is it a plague
sent by God

if we have faith
will we recover

or it is beyond our control
the end of the world

does god hear our prayers
does god even exist

the virus from hell
spreads around the world

and test our faith
will god save us all

I have no answer
but perhaps if god exists

we will recover
from this plague
from hell



The call goes out

the call goes out
stay at home
to beat the dreaded c virus

will we live
or all die?

the four horse men ready to ride

the end of the world is upon us
as god unleashes the corona virus
which is spreading across the land

the four horse men are ready
to begin their grim journal
announcing the end of the world

the white horse comes first
offering peace and hope
in the midst of death
and despair

the red horse rides second
ushering in war
throughout the world
as nations turn on each other
and civil war looms

the Black Horse is ready
unleashing famine
on a starving world
as people stay at home
and food rots in the field

no one is able
to work any more
as the virus kills more
and more

the pale horse rides last
bringing death
in his wake

death all around us
as the virus kills us all
and civilization ends

the four horse men
have done their job
the virus finishes its reign of terror
and the few survivors
beging to recover

end of the world
came and went
and they are still alive
thanks to God

who remains silent
as always

nature spirits revolt against humanity

all around the world
nature's spirits
are on the move

the world is changing
as the nature's spirits
rise up
in revolt against humanity

is this the end time
is nature on revolt
against humanity

is this the end for us all
will the virus **** us all
will nature rise up
and **** us all?

Last Human on Island

Last human on an island
in the deep blue sea
nothing there
but death and destruction

virus all around
pandemic plague
Apocalyptic views
end of times
death of civilization




corona virus

corona virus
staying home waiting for death
Afraid everything  
the virus came from hell

the virus came from hell
staying home waiting for death
Afraid everything  
Bring Out Your Dead

bring out your dead cries
break out all over the world
we are waiting death



death comes knocking

death comes knocking
on our doorsteps tonight
will God hear prayers



be afraid afraid

be afraid afraid
Must be afraid every one
Death is at our door


The Virus Came From Hell


the virus came from Hell
ravaging the entire world
all waiting for death
my take on the corona virus pandemic  for more check out my blog, https://theworldaccordingtocosmos.com
Morgan Jul 2013
I'm afraid of your consistent apathy
The way your body sits still
and patient through
days of excruciating pain or
the way your hands stay
folded in your lap as your
phone rings in your pocket
I'm afraid of the drugs running
laps in your veins
while your eyes sink into your skull
creating hollow shadows on your face
I'm afraid of losing you
Or refusing to accept that I already have
I'm afraid that if I never had you I'd have nothing to write about
Equally afraid of every crumpled page in this bedroom that has your name etched into its margin
I'm afraid of the catching in my throat at five in the morning
And the cigarette in my hand that makes it happen
I'm afraid of the sizes in my clothes
Or maybe I'm just afraid of how much time I've wasted trying to decrease them
I'm afraid of the silent agony
that is too often conveyed in a stranger's eye
I'm afraid of how flawlessly I've learned to lie
I'm afraid of the people who don't have any of the things that they need
But I'm more afraid of the people who have all of the things that they want
I'm afraid of my best friend
I'm afraid that he doesn't know how to love
And I'm afraid that I don't help him as much as I can
I'm afraid that I'm afraid to change
Cause
One day fades
An other blends in
And lalala this is life
*When will I be afraid enough
To make it end
Paul Gilhooley Jun 2017
Afraid to live, afraid to care,
Afraid to give, afraid to dare,
Afraid to scream, afraid to cope,
Afraid to dream, afraid to hope,
Afraid of fears, afraid of deception,
Afraid of tears, afraid of perception,
Afraid of new, afraid of woe,
Afraid of you, afraid of no.
Victoria Newman Oct 2010
It’s hard to say why
I cry myself to sleep at night
When I’m left wondering why
You and I just aren’t alright
It’s hard to say why
I die a little when you walk away
I think I’m just
I think I’m just afraid.

I’m afraid you’ll forget me
When you’re in your pit
I’m afraid you’ll hurt me
I’m afraid you’ll get tired of it
The concept of us
I’m afraid that I
Won’t be able to trust
You.

I’ve lost count how many times
You’ve made me die, you’ve made me cry
And you just don’t realise
What the meanings are behind my sighs
And you just don’t realise
Why I’ve had to resort to lies
I think I’m just
I think I‘m just afraid.

I’m afraid you’ll forget me
When you’re in your pit
I’m afraid you’ll hurt me
I’m afraid you’ll get tired of it
The concept of us
I’m afraid that I
Won’t be able to trust
You.

I’m forced to hide
Behind this fake smile
To make you think
I’ve not run a mile
I’m forced to believe
That you still love me
When in fact I believe
That you really can’t see
What’s really killing me
Or is it just my mind playing tricks
On me?

I’m afraid you’ll forget me
When you’re in your pit
I’m afraid you’ll hurt me
I’m afraid you’ll get tired of it
The concept of us
I’m afraid that I
Won’t be able to trust
You.

I’m afraid you’ll let me go
Yes, that time will come, I know
But please delay it as long as you can
Because I know I can.
Eugene Melnyk Mar 2015
I am afraid of leaving people.
I am afraid of people leaving me.
Afraid of the world,
But I am not afraid of you.

I am afraid of loosing control.
I am afraid of loosing my mind.
Afraid of people in general,
But I am not afraid of being kind.

I am not afraid of lions.
I am not afraid by bears closing in.
Not afraid of you,
But letting you win.

I am afraid of flying saucers.
I am not afraid of monsters.

I am afraid of a man who cannot choose.
I am not afraid of a God who cannot loose.

I am afraid of the men who run the country.
I am not afraid of the mounties.

Fear is logical.
Phobia is logical.
Obedience is nonsensical.
No more weird notes

Ha
Jacob Oates Oct 2013
I know you're afraid
You know I used to be afraid
Is this something I fear? I'm afraid not
Take your fears, and please let them rest for the night

For me the fear was only ever from the unknown,
the unknowable, the untold

I don't fear anymore in that way, because of what I know now

Not afraid that you would know, not afraid what that would mean
Not afraid of where you'd go, not afraid of how it seems

I don't need reassurance, I don't need explanation
You don't need to affirm a thing, that goes beyond the situation

I'm not afraid to see you here, in this place where my fears had gone to taunt me
I know enough of the big picture now to not sweat the gaps
I'm not afraid of a disconnect, because what you taught me goes beyond that

I dispel my fears the more I know, and the more I need to know
I don't need to name every star in the sky at night to know it fills me with awe
much the way I don't need to have every question answered,
when you were the real answer to my questions

I'm not afraid to be that answer, to work for it, to be that impossible completion
I'm not afraid of the work, the confusion, the learned constraint

I don't fear anymore in that way, because of what I know now
Take your fears, and please let them rest for the night

Let's not be afraid to mock ourselves, and how much we were scared to admit what we knew
And if you're still scared, I'd like to be brave for us

I'm not afraid to just let it flow, to just let it go, and I won't be afraid to let you know

I don't need reassurance, I don't need explanation
you **** my fears and bring liberation

Take your fears, and let them rest for the night,
so I can see the cosmos of you, and know I'm filled with awe
You are afraid if we tell you
afraid if we conceal (what we would really like to say)
afraid that we might indoctrinate you
afraid that we would rather like for you to disappear
afraid that we talk about you
afraid that we ignore what you are about
afraid that our words might be too harsh
afraid that we'll walk out without your blessing
afraid that we like to think outside of dogma
afraid that we take pleasure on challenging what you hold dear
afraid that we don't feel defended by your body (or by your *****)
afraid that you might not cut it
or that we will use you (as a souvenir)
afraid that we are [not] conspicuous (sometimes we are)
afraid that (we are quite queer)
afraid of conspiracy and delusion
afraid of truth
afraid of me.
Someone Aug 2014
I'm afraid of what people think of me sometimes.
I'm afraid to really see myself.
I'm afraid of others seeing the real me.
I'm afraid of being told by someone that I love what they truly think of me.
I'm afraid of people dying.
I'm afraid of having a relationship.
I'm afraid of hurting people.
I'm afraid of hurting animals feelings.
I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing.
I'm afraid of people hating me.
I'm afraid of no one ever really loving me.
I'm afraid of people leaving me.
I'm afraid to cry in front of someone who thinks i'm strong.
I'm afraid of not being able to handle myself.
I'm afraid that I haven't had my lowest point yet.
I don't know...
Sheila J Sadr Oct 2014
I am afraid to be afraid too afraid
        to be still but still healing still
afraid to open all my heavy doors that
        he has seen too much unkempt skin
                 that I am afraid of him that we

are broken that he was always broken but we are nothing
         but bandaged apricots in the rotting August sun and he
is afraid we have too much or not enough time
         afraid of us afraid of me afraid to speak but he
                 breathes hot scorpion-kissed lullabies into

my neck into scarlet corners of my pituitary
         poisons all my wearied nerves I used to call him
master used to master our loose laundry I
        refused to fold used to master our loose smiles
                 in front of people I refused to fold for

I used to accept his virulent apologies after business trips
        I used to be afraid of him he used to be afraid
of my amphibian temper afraid of how I
        waxed and waned through tempestuous waters afraid
                that he was always drowning

I am afraid of the dark blue ghosts their red
        angry heat I am afraid to eat cartridged
bullets of my own words silver gunpowdered
        shrapnels if I eat them all lead like you would
seep into the insides of my abdomen

my insides are unreachable have a little
        too much sunshine to carry along when spring
arrives I am scared because the light
        comes in with brilliant blazing eyes
               and sees everything

                            October 8, 2014 7:04 AM
Inspired by "I'm afraid to be afraid" by Victoria Chang
jeffrey robin Sep 2010
wakin in the mornin feelin weak
afraid to sail
afraid to
"sink or swim"

afraid of the karma
of the water

walkin roads amid all the signs
afraid to live
afraid to die

afraid of the
true sons
(the warriors)

we tell eachother such stories
filled with horror
we tell eachother false tales
of love

afraid of the
holy ******
daughter

well well
here we are
nothin is what we got
nowhere's
the name of the place

afraid to live
afraid to die

afraid of the karma
we see in our face
in the mirror

wakin in the mornin feelin weak
afraid to sail
afraid to
"sink or swim"

afraid of the karma
of the water

wakin in the mornin feelin weak
afraid to sail
afraid to
"sink or swim"

afraid of the karma
of the water
Kennedy Taylor Dec 2014
I'm afraid to be alone.
I'm afraid to be forgotten.
I'm afraid to let you in.
Because my trust is rotten.

I'm afraid I want you here.
I'm afraid I hope you'll stay.
I'm afraid to open up.
Because I know you'll go away.

I'm afraid I'm already hurt.
I'm afraid I did this to myself.
I'm afraid no one will ever stay.
Because all I seem to do is repel.

I'm afraid to ask how you feel.
I'm afraid that I already know.
I'm afraid I don't mean much.
So I guess I'll let you go.

Please don't worry when I'm alone
But please remember my name.
I hope you enjoyed your stay.
I'm afraid I knew you'd leave from the first day.
The Broken Poet Jun 2015
She walks in the hallways nothing but couples holding hands and proclaiming their love to one another. She stares at awe, wishing for one day to be married and to never divorce, but the timing is just not right for her. She's a sucker for romance novels, she's loves getting lost in their magic. All her friends are dating now, but she is not ready for commitment. She is not ready for the heartache, or the pain of getting hurt. She pushes everybody away once they start to develop feelings for her. She's afraid of getting hurt, so she must hurt them before they can hurt her. She slowly pushes them away and she slowly creeps into the shadows afraid of being seen by the boys. Oh! But by midnight, she'll be up all night reading some romance novel, but she is not ready and she is content with not being ready. Relationships are normal, they say, relationships are natural, the say, but they will never look within her heart for she will never give herself up like that. She is afraid of men. She is afraid of boys. She is afraid of confiding her love in someone that can leave right before her very eyes. She is not ready for her romance novels to be fake, she still lives in her dreams and in her dreams, no one gets hurt, but this is the real world and she is bound to get hurt. She locks up her heart, only willing to give it to the man who stays to find the key gravely contained within Her soul, way beyond a human's ability. She does not want her imagination on love to be fake. She does not and will not let a boy ruin her expectations on love. She is too young for that. After High School, you'll forget me and I'll forget you. Nothing will work, everything is only temporary. She is not ready for commitment. We are too young to commit ourselves way beyond the next minute. I am not ready. I am afraid of boys. I am afraid of men. I am afraid of getting hurt. I am afraid of commitment. I am afraid of never being loved. I am afraid of being loved. They just don't get it! Men are stronger and more aggressive and just like that, they can make way with you. I am not ready for that. I am not ready for love. I am afraid of being loved. I am simply afraid.
Milica Markovic Feb 2013
Afraid of feeling love
Afraid of making love
Afraid of giving love
Afraid of taking love
Afraid of cherishing love
Afraid of dreaming love
Afraid of sharing love
Afraid of knowing love
Afraid of waiting love
Afraid of getting love
Afraid of loving love
Afraid of hurting love
Afraid of healing love
Afraid of me…
Afraid of yourself…
Afraid of us.
Zack Ripley Apr 2019
We're afraid to live.
We're afraid to die.
We're afraid to try.
We're afraid of what happens if we don't try.
We're afraid to love.
We're afraid to commit.
We're afraid people think we're full of ****.
We're afraid of the truth.
We're afraid to lie.
We're afraid people will think we're weak if they see us cry.
We're afraid to feel.
We're afraid of fear.
But knowledge is power.
So now that you know what you fear,
what are you going to do about it right now? Right here?

— The End —