Which takes us on a direct path to:
THE  INCIDENT.
Say you are a normal man—whatever that means—
But say it’s late June of 1993 and you’re laying on the couch,
Scratching your *****, trying to intuit your LDL level
Based on the two bowls of the Old Lady’s Cholesterol Chowder.
The Old Lady-- you can call her Peg or Mrs. Bundy—
Served it up in her special legacy china,
An assortment of recycled tin foil casserole dishes &
Vintage melmac handed down by your mother-in-law.
You are on the couch giving digestion your best shot,
Still scratching your agates when Peg comes
In from the kitchen with your second glass of
Two-buck chuck and a smoking fatty she’s just ignited,
Miraculously without burning the house down.
The TV is on—the TV is always on because
The TV has had no off button since 1984
You are tuned to the CNN evening news &
A report comes on that makes you sit up,
Snap to attention, straight up and take notice:
"WOMAN CUTS OFF HUSBAND'S *****!"
The media shrikes in Atlanta have your attention now,
Your complete attention;
Your eyes are riveted to the telescreen &
Your blood pressure spiking at 240 over 140.
During the previous night of June 23, 1993,
John Wayne Bobbitt arrives at the
Couple's apartment in Manassas, Virginia,
Highly intoxicated after a night of partying.
According to testimony given by Lorena Bobbitt
In a 1994 court hearing, he then rapes her.
Afterwards, Lorena Bobbitt gets out of bed,
Goes to the kitchen for a drink of water.
According to a journal article in the
National Women's Justice & Defense
League of Psychotic Castrating *******,
While in the kitchen she notices,
A carving knife on the counter & "memories of
Past domestic abuse races through her head."
Grabbing the knife, Lorena Bobbitt enters the bedroom
Where John is sleeping & proceeds to
Cut off nearly half his *****,
Half his Johnson,
In this instance aptly named.
So you have some schnook who’s named
After the iconic Hollywood superstar John Wayne . . .
Now understand something, John Wayne—
The ******* Duke of Earl--
Personifies everything alpha male:
Physique, animal magnetism & a pair of
Huge ***** swinging in his chaps as
He sashays across the screen.
In real life he’s a bullfight & cigar aficionado,
A big game hunter and sport fisherman, &
A hard drinking Hemingway hero
Who spends most of his time aboard
A customized WWII U.S. mine sweeper
******* to a pier behind his house in
Newport Harbor, California.
He’s the proverbial man’s man, &
There’s no one like him in America
Until maybe Eastwood or Willis comes along.
There’s a statue of him out in front of
The Orange County Airport that bears his name.
I have a photograph of him hanging in my garage
Next to a Mad-Dog 20-20 poster.
But I digress.
We return to the Bobbitt story because
It gets better, keeps getting crazier.
After assaulting her husband,
Lorena leaves the apartment with the severed *****,
Drives around aimlessly for a short while,
Then rolls down the car window &
Throws the ***** into a field.
Only then does the loony ***** realize
The severity of the incident.
She stops and calls 911.
After an exhaustive search by
Volunteers from the local Humane Society,
The ***** is located, packed in the ice-slurry of
A banana-flavored 7/11 Slurpee, &
Taken to the hospital where half-**** John Bobbitt
Gets a short-arm inspection and treated,
Mostly for shock and awe.
His ***** is later reattached by Drs. James T. Sehn &
David Berman during a nine-and-a-half-hour surgery
Filmed by Ken Burns and broadcast in its entirety by
WGBH Boston, a stunning illustration of
Your tax dollars hard at work
At the National Endowment for the Arts.
An abridged version later becomes the season premier of
"Girls Gone ******* ******, Manassas!"
Lorena goes on Oprah to explain herself.

Lorena Bobbitt ((née Gallo) was born in Ecuador.
Her maiden name, ironically,
Means **** in English.
Sheriff Joe Arpaio in Phoenix had this to say:
“Deport the *****. She may have an INS green card
But there’s no way she had a government permit to
Go around lopping ***** off in Virginia or any other state.
Who does she think she is, Janet Napolitano?”
Napolitano could not be reached for comment.
Shortly after the incident, episodes of "Bobbittmania,"
Or copycat crimes, were reported.
The name Lorena Bobbitt eventually became
Synonymous with ***** removal.
The terms "Bobbitt Punishment" and "Bobbitt Procedure" gained
Social cache with a radical break-away sect of N.O.W.
COPYCAT Catherine Kieu Becker, 48 (Garden Grove P.D.)  
Woman Accused of Cutting Off Husband's *****
Pleads Not Guilty/ VIDEO: Watch Jennifer Gould's Report
KTLA News   10:40 a.m. PST, February 3, 2012 /SANTA ANA, Calif.
"A 48-year-old woman accused of cutting off
Her husband's ***** and putting it
In the garbage disposal has pleaded
Not guilty to all the charges against her.
Catherine Kieu, of Garden Grove,
Was indicted earlier this month on
One felony count of torture &
One felony count of aggravated mayhem.
She also faces a sentencing enhancement for
Practicing surgical medicine without a license."
Sign up for KTLA 5 Breaking News Email Alerts
Comments (130) Add / View comments | Discussion FAQ
Happy627 at 10:35 PM January 18, 2012
"So my x-wife is a violent drunken *****?
Never once did I ever think of hurting her
But now I see I was wrong.
Vengeance's is the true answer & payback is hell.
So basically I should put an M-40
In her *** and light the fuse.
I should be acquitted from any wrong doing
Because she was a violent drunken *****.
Maybe all men should do this to their
Violent wives/girlfriends & teach them a lesson.
Cyanmanta at 1:10 AM January 11, 2012
In response to Doreen Meyer:
"So you're assuming that because he was the victim
He must have done something to deserve it
In some small way?
Typical of convenient feminism:
Assume all female victims are innocent &
Pure as driven snow,
While dismissing all male victims
With the idea that 'he had it coming.'
I wish I could pander shamelessly
To the media for preferential treatment,
But sadly, I am male (or as feminists would say)
The Evil Gender."
Westfield at 5:47 PM Jan.09, 2012
She should get her own show on the ***** channel.
(Bravo). KABC radio's John Phillips & his girlfriend
Nathan Baker would love to watch it."
Sluff it off, take a load off, baby.
Take a load off?
“Take a load off Annie,
Take a load for free;
Take a load off Annie, and
Bom bom bom bom
Bom be bom— & Dddddddddd,
You can put the load right on me.”
Send “The Weight” Ringtone to Your Cell

. . . Snipped, fixed, neutered, gelded,
Emasculated, eunuchized, or castrated?
(Castrating Forceps  (www.alibaba.com/
Showroom/castration-tool.html).
Bobbittized!

Gusto ko ng panibagong balat.
Iyong maputi at makinis.
Mala porselana,
Na halos kuminang tuwing masisinagan ng araw.
Kabisado ko ang bilang ng araw,
Na ginugugol sa ilalim ng araw kakabanat.

Ngunit,
Ang panibagong balat,
Hindi nito ako kayang protektahan, alam ko.
Lilimitahan lamang nito ang mga nalalaman ko.
Ngunit,
Sa panibagong balat, nais ko magsimula.
Kilalanin at kalimutan ng halos magkasabay,
Ang imahe ng nakakadiri kong balat.

Bilang ang peklat.
Sukat ko kung gaano kalalim ito,
Noong sugat pa lamang.
Kaya ko gusto ng bagong balat para pagtakpan ito.
Baka sakaling iwasto ng bago kong balat,
Ang mga naimali ko.

Makikilala kaya ako ng ibang tao,
Sa bagong balat na suot ko?

Marahil hindi,
sana hindi,
panigurado hindi.

Nais kong magtago,
Sa paraan kung paano ako lulutang ng hubo't hubad.
Nang hindi ko na itatakip,
Ang aking palad sa aking dibdib,
Dahon sa ibaba ng puson.

Isisigaw ko ang salitang "PUTA!" ng napakalakas,
Halos magsisilabas
Ang mga putang mismong makakarinig,
At yayakapin ko sila.

Dahil bago ang balat ko, ito'y mainit.
Kumpara sa nahamugan kong balat kagabi.
Malinis,
Kumpara sa balat kong may dampi ng mabahong laway.
Mabango,
Kumpara sa mumurahing aficionado na nahaluan
Ng pawis ni Ricardo kagabi.

Bagong balat.
Ibebenta ko ang luma kong balat,
Sa gabing ito.
Bilhin mo ang aking balat.

May panibago bukas,
Pag-asa, hamon,
Mantikilya sa loob ng pandesal.

Gamit ang luma kong balat,
Makakabili pa ba ako ng bago?

Magkaiba ang bagong uri sa bagong palit.
Ang balat ko, nalaspag na.
Tulad ng puti kong damit,
Hindi na ito puti.

Marumi ang titig ko.
Marumihin ang aking naisuot.
Ang balat ko ay puno ng mantsa,
Ngunit bago ang aking suot ngayon, bagamat,
Iisa parin ng uri.

Balat na nakalaan para ulitin ang pagrumi at
Yurak sa puti kong suot.
Bagong balat, kulay puti.
Wala na akong maisuot.

Hubad na ang aking puri.
Hindi ko masuot ang salapi.
Magkano pera mo? Tara?
Nais mo bang makita ang aking balat?

My girlfriend
Recently
Moved in with me
So she decided
To call her friend,
Who was also
A close friend of mine,
For a couple of beers
In the now 'our' house.
Carmel Scotts
Arrived, knocked,
At around 9,
And girlfriend let him in
And his motorcycle
Sat outside near my
****** old car.
He was a skinny
Ill skin tone guy
Due to his being a
Poppy aficionado,
And he dressed
Like he belonged at
A London punk rock
Concert in the early 80s.
He came in
With his huge mohawk
Flipping God and the system off
And his boots
Knock knock knocking
On Satan's roof.
'Sup' 'Sup' 'Beer?'
'Yeah man, of course'
And we drank and drank
And the now 'our' clock's hands
Moved and struck
12.
We were quite drunk.
I put on
That record
By The Stooges
That we loved
And went to take a ****.
When I came back
Iggy was moaning about
Some Deathe Car
While on the now 'our' floor
Carmel crouched
Like a tiger
Above girlfriend's opened legs
As she too moaned
Being eaten alive by
the now 'our' friend.
They were really going at it
And didn't notice I was back.
I was mad,
Really ****** mad.
I was about
To slam him
Off girlfriend and beat him
To a pulp
When suddenly, I woke up.
I remembered
That I don't have a girlfriend,
(I never have had one)
And I don't have a punk friend
(Or any friend really).
So from mad
I turned sad
And got drunk without both of em.

They made an elephant paint,
              using reward and punishment, method
marvelously created paintings!
                that success made world headlines!!
*******, yet another folly of human creation,
                 let me tell you the truth, kept hidden.
Angry for not getting coconut fronts,
              generously supplied in other occasions,
the elephant just pretended the brush was palm front substitute,
                the paint kept  in front, to him was dung to play with.
          The shapes of his hunger turned  to accidental art,
it wasn't his fault,  poor guy, his canvas cries out!

i.

(DedPoet-aka-Ernesto L. Gonzales)
May god bless thee mine friend, man of honor, Heavensent;
Thy soul, may it be in peace, God's love cover's thee west to east.

ii.

(NvrMnd)
A poet of otherworldly mind, poetic of new aged times;
Dont let thy depression over cometh thy soul, be unbound, whole.

iii.

(Laurent)
a dear writer of inspiration, let thy writing be navigation; spread thine hope to foreign places, with love friend.

iv.

(Tropica)
Poetess of aficionado tenderness, splendidness guideth thee;
A poet of human qualities, an artist for love's recipe in all form.

v.

(Darlene Chavez)
Let thy darkness turneth into light, let the night turn to day;
Be not shackled to Misery's way's,, but knoweth God's with thee.

vi.

(Sara Murray)
A fan of the strange, a taste that hast meaning, caring and giving;
Reality mixed with dreaming, word's golden, gleaming to aloft.

vii.

(Sally A Bayan)
From the terra firma of mine queen, the most thoughtful, delightful being, an aura that screameth of all holiness aisle's.

viii.

(naǧí)
A native light, of old day's flame's, a bright tunnel beyond the pain's, a pathway to other places where faces art spiritual.

ix.

(damsel in distress)
A woman of talented word's, like Herb's, elixered and pictured;
Snapshot's art taken from thine view, with all sight in old truth.

x.

(Dreams of Sepia)
Writing of mysterious writing's. Though honest, inviting;
Exciting in thy new day's pages, anger love and saved for us all.

xi.

(SoulSurvivor)
A woman like an auntie to me, a woman of generation's who helpeth the blind to none god seeith, as thou art a friend!!!!

xii.

(SE Reimer)
Man of many technique's, giving hope and beauties when we art weak, thy word's speaketh of medicinal purposes for all to seek.

xiii.

(PoetryJournal)
Writing short lines. Beyond mankind; thine artwork is fine;
Making other's look again, rewind, thine design's art heaven.

xiv.

(Melissa S)
A mother from the place of alabama, with southern charm;
Writing southern song's, of southern scar's,, as well as smile's.

xv.

(Poetic Thoughts)
Thou lover of books, a enthusiastic being of singing;
Keepeth on with thy work's, let the earth shake on thy poetry.

xvi.

(Eddie Starr Poetry)
Let Christ continueth to work in thine life, showeth love as he taught, and forgiveness; thou shalt soon findeth thy wife!!!

xvii.

(Paul Gaffney)
A gentleman who liketh simple poetry, that hit's thee best;
A way of relieving stress is writing down daily thought's, great!!

xviii.

(Rosalind Heather Alexander)
Overcometh those whom leaveth thee due to thy faith;
There missing out on truth and God's grace, continueth in love!!!

xix.

(IvyB **)
A woman who knoweth pain, keepeth faith in trial rain's;
Keepeth held high, the mist is only a short period, as angel's wait.

**.

(NV)
Creature of sadness, in a world of madness, making sense of living; let lighting seraph's be thy giving, look aloft to hope.

xxi.

(Joseph Paris)
A man of many duo's, Chicago street walker, rebel era, man of many poetic mirror's, let thy beautiful reflection dance the city.

xxii.

(ThePoet)
Thy word's of hurt and screaming, of hope and dreaming;
Is Alive in all ourn spirit's, trust thy creator, let the light near it.

xxiii.

(PoetessLiz)
Poetry is thy vital force, poetry is thy life porch;
Thou art not so lonely as thou doth thinkest friend, we all careth.

xxiv.

(SG Holter)
A man of blossoming stanza's, lines of manna;
Holy old detail's, word's of holy grail highness.

xxv.

(susan)
Digging through the deepest thought's creating poetry;
Spread thy gospel, plant thy seed's, and let them spread around.

xxvi.

(Dawn S)
Also new to this site, welcome; spread thy foregone scripture's;
Like ancient Picasso picture's, thine painting's art priceless.



©Brandon Nagley
©Lonesome poets poetry
©Dedication poem \part 2 new one...

Late in life I struggle against my insignificance
When I should enjoy the freedom from performance before an audience.
Applause is happiness but if they withhold applause, embarrassment.
When Da Liu put me to work crunching hexagrams and spreadsheet
      numerology
Instead of ghost writing his books about t’ai chi for longevity
I was humiliated but freed. No need to interpret
The Chinese master’s wisdom or endure his disapproval.
All this happened in an apartment on 110th St. when I lived on 111th.
I wonder if Da Liu lived to 100 like he predicted.

Ken got me that job, old friend Ken
Who goes back all the way past high school to Thompson Junior High.
Tomorrow we’re eating pizza together in Troy.
We’ll recall Da Liu and also the painter and sculptor who had a room
In our apartment on 111th and a dog so intelligent it could walk off the
      leash
On the crowded streets of New York without an altercation,
And Zach Sklar, of course, journalist, communist and jazz aficionado
Who listened to Jo Jones and Paul Quinichette, Count Basie’s men,
Often as possible at the West End.

Trying to make sense on the trumpet, I was playing the streets for
      quarters, not much more
Than that sculptor’s dog, the sculptor’s name I wanna say
Was Mike Johnson and he was a man of few words and many women.
We had a major cockroach problem in that apartment and
The ceiling leaked in Ken’s room so he organized the neighbors
Against the landlord, into a tenants association.
We went to our daily disciplines like children of paradise or Da Liu who
      was already old by then.
When we meet for pizza it will be hard to hear now that I’m deaf
In one ear and Ken, whose name means knowledge, has trouble
      remembering some of the ancient, past taboos and practices.

To want to be famous is a silly goal for a man almost old as Da Liu.
Not the right motivation, better to shift your glances so slowly as to go
      unnoticed,
Labor for the success and happiness of others.
I’m still avoiding the deeper question
So today I ordered Da Liu’s books, perhaps the ones I worked on,
Because they offer assistance to others for further living.
Service to others, maybe that’s the key.

I pleasure in and treasure my insignificance,
It ought to be a great comfort to be so insignificant,
Being knowledgeable is the best defense against your insignificance, the
I Ching puts me in mind of my insignificance, exiled or
Sidelined to an insignificant role, insignificant and mighty happenings
Seem the same from my vantage aging gratefully, inexorably,
A way to learn your insignificance, freedom to have never been.

i

In the snowbroth, in the chill of the eve'
Mine aficionado inamorata shalt swoon me;
Under the gloss, of the ancient moss
Under the *******, overhead albatross.

ii

Thou art the apricity, when the wind bloweth cold
Thou art the castle, wherein is mine abode;
Thou art the rose, with none Thorn's attached
Thou art the night and day, a movie, stage, angel hatched

iii

Gorgonized, thou hath done to me
Directing me under thine foretoken;
Thine voice is quiet, though so captivating
Thy locution is so spiritual, liberating.

iv

Thou art a snoutfair, angel wing's, oriental hair
Freed I am, from the world of man, a perfected pair;
Thou maketh me want to do better in all of mine way's
I shalt loveth thee tommorrow mine queen, and more today.

©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry
©Earl Jane dedication

1.. A man obsessed with self-improvement. He only falls for women who make him "want to be a better man." He becomes that better man, then leaves them.

2. Horror aficionado who's obsessed with death; falls in love with women who are dead on the inside.

3, 4, 5, 6. A gay man falls in love with a straight man.
A straight woman falls in love with a gay man.
A straight man falls in love with a gay woman.
A gay woman falls in love with a straight woman.

7. A ****** falls in love with a **** star.

8. A strategic genius falls in love, then treats every action and word as maneuvers in some elaborate game that she has no idea is even being played. He loses.

9. A drug addict falls in love with anyone.

10. Momma's boy who hates his mother; only falls for women he can't stand.

11. Bored sociopath/criminal moves to a new town and tries to convince  the locals that he's afraid of everything (so that they won't suspect him of doing anything remotely dangerous). A woman who actually is afraid of everything feels bad for him and tries her best to comfort him. He falls in love with her.

After my plan ended
I turned to seriousness, 
like an uncluttered aficionado
I persisted with slide film,
treating them as an unfurnished enrichment,
for although not mounted
their sleeves were of equal impression
that captured the many verdant gardens visited,
holding them to a light box;
torn between being an Artist and a collector,
a feeling seemed to be conjured,
like a tentative transition
my heart wanted change,
tall shadows of people
cast contra jour,
a new benchmark for Autumns
dry like thatch.

another morning
another chemical coating
another narcissistic lathering
soaping my hair, face, body
antiperspirant, lotion
sunscreen, hair gel, eye drops
toothpaste, mouthwash

there’s nothing real about me
I am fake, head to toe
plastics, aerosols, fragrances
trying to preserve the real real
or mask it or hide it or fix it
as the mirror snickers at me
in 2d flat-screen mockery

I’m a stranger, a hitchhiker in
a borrowed body, a rogue

uncovered, this facade
bared down to its natural
stench and style

is something unpublishable,
something never in vogue

I think there’s something you need to understand, I’m not half the man, you want me to, be. I am but burning embers; that is all that is left, of a time that was blessed with love, life and forever afters. I watch you lie whilst you are asleep, never have I seen anything so sweet as just to see you quiet and at peace. And when you awake it is as if, you never were here, and I long for the girl I saw dreaming of blind nothings. I want to see your sun, rise. I want to breathe freely with you. I want to sit with you and think of nothing, at all. I don’t want to hear your queries or handle your questions. I don’t want to be your placebo or neutered affection.

You have the capacity to bend and break, to give and take. But it’s like a language you don’t understand. Your fragility to me is something you cannot see. You believe in a faith I see is unkind, you believe but I think you are blind. But this is just my observation. And I have been proved wrong many times before. Who am I, to think that your words are wrong and don’t make sense to my heart? I listen with great in trepidation to what you think you are saying. I wish I could understand you. I try my best. Sometimes it’s not good enough. I am deemed weak to your tough. I am too heady, living in the clouds. And yet I do not doubt, you; rather you should doubt me, and I be less in your eyes, I can see them, benign with distaste, at something you don’t understand.

I think you look pretty. Your eyes sparkle with anonymity to their shine. To me. Sorry for what I have done. A million times before; to think you are something more. Too many expectations blur my vision, to give you too much to aspire to and the let you feel my derision. Here is peace. In my arms. I wait for you. I promise. I take off my grief for you, my hat is laid on the bed, for here I am at home. Turning your head to the east, I look to the west, I watch you put on your Sunday Best. For you would never show yourself naked to me. Never undress fully for me. Never look at me, except in a moment of passion, when I can see you. And I mean the blinding beauty that you hold within you.

I turned off the telephone, because I was waiting for your call. For I could feed you a thousand times a day, and still your hunger would not be fulfilled. So here I am left here, wondering, what is your exact use for me? I am not your mirror, nor your aficionado. Maybe you should come with a list of instructions because I am as lost as I was found before I met you. You look beautiful tonight, in that dress, in those shoes. And I thought you were going to leave. Me. I think I kinda like it. Because although you can’t see it, I am smiling, at you. That your beauty is only skin deep, it seems.

Check the yellow pages
And the funny papers
We gotta find those contact lenses that will change our brown eyes blue
Then promenade to the place

Whatchya got on tap?
Lemonade?
Give me the recipe

That's a odd catch phrase you got there, "I'll **** you with a railroad spike!"

Tell me how the worldwide aficionado only got the bronze metal

She cries at the drop of a hat
Now they've revoked her drivers licence  

He's eating flower petals, that man in the corner over there
He's in for a rude awakening
That's poison oak or is it poison ivy?
Either way that's his lot in life

The man from the nuclear power plant comes in and tells m to get welded as he slaps some roadkill on the counter with great hubris

He told the cook to fry it up so no one here would have to eat processed, pasteurized, homogenized, hydrogenated genetically modified food with an appeasing garnish on top  

Mmm tire marks
Tastes like this thing has been through the marsh
Some kind of wetland

Before I leave someone yells from the back, "You want the weather? Look up an hope for the best!"

Help Wanted
Inquire Within

Joy so constant we took it for granted
plugging jukeboxes with quarters
loading those noisy machines with B-sides
that only we had ever heard

Van Morrison's "Blue Money" bounced the skip
from station to station in the AM static
we loved that doowit dooey doop, doot door dooey doot, do doot
but the mystic sang of sweet things on the other side

"Saturday Nights Alright For Fighting ", tough ol' Elton John
worth a quarter to hear that song
flip that ***** get your money's worth
two songs there for the price of one

The Stones rocked "Brown Sugar" like slavers in heat
too young I was to understand
why the controversy, so many offended
I rarely chose it, though, cuz I loved "Sway"

"Sweet Hitch Hiker", CCR
sounded more like a razor than a tuned up car
do you remember "Door to Door"?
didn't think you would

"Children's Heritage" over "D.O.A."
"Generation Landslide" over "Hello Hooray"
"For Emily Whenever I May Find Her" over "Bridge Over Troubled Water"
yes, even

B-sides whenever possible
because the A-sides were all on the radio
why feed money to the jukebox for a song you can hear for free?
such are the economics and logic of the 10 year old music aficionado

even for
the non aficionado

when you say
such trite things as

step up to the plate

knock it out of the park

they can still feel
the solid oak of the bat

smell the oiled
leather of the glove

and hear the crack

as the ball soars
higher into the sky

past the cheap seats
and beyond

and I wonder

how could I
have dismissed

these words
and turns of phrases

so raw
golden
sweet and bardic

Whit Howland © 2019

Versus me
(chilling as an outsize ego freezer)
profusely perspiring
and heavily panting
experiencing one after another
stuff whet dreams are made
frolicking in autumn mist
(think Maxfield Parrish painting)
while skirt chasing
and playfully tackling,
a gamesome gamine with verve
mercilessly coquettish ingenue
"precociously seductive"
overgrown ****** wannabe.

Solitude and introvertedness
mebbe made more manifest destiny
courtesy severe nasal notable twang
(otherwise known as split uvula)
yours truly wittingly drew taunts
and unutterable pang
to escape being bullied as scapegoat
entering magical world
of mine imagination
fostered learning about
all creatures great and small
by age appropriate books.

Logophile lusts ever stronger after
twenty six letter combinations
(analogously surrendering to mistress)
that yield an estimated 171,146 words
currently in use in the English language;
according to the Oxford English Dictionary,
an additional 47,156 obsolete words exist.

I luxuriate engrossed
with choice reading material
and out of desperation
to slake insatiable thirst
(to discern syllabification)
yours truly doth read aloud
intently hearing cadence
of vowels and consonants.

Up until I entered six grade
(at Henry Kline elementary -
a one classroom per grade - school)
classmates bullied, derided,
and feigned to hammer -
jabbing leering, nasty
pimping ragout as a rule
which boyhood self of mine
availed a perfect bullseye target
with combination of diminutiveness,

being painfully quiet,
essentially remaining mum the entire day
except when called upon to answer question
thence utterance emanating between lips
produced and emitted
a strong nasal sound to boot
grist for the mill
sans malice meted, mimicked,
and mocked mashup
of mine warped congestion

ah, twas only by a fluke conversation,
whence a speech pathologist
informed my parents about
the Lancaster Cleft Palate clinic,
where oral an examination
revealed minor birth defect
identified as a submucous cleft palate,
which explained the severe pinched twang
somewhat mitigated by wearing
a removable prosthetic
fashioned by Prosthodontist

Dr. Mohammad Mazaheri MSC, DDS
fastened with clasps to upper teeth
whereby a makeshift miniature
plastic protuberance closed the gap
so air would be prevented
passing thru my button nose
and thus gentle and soft as a shutterfly
shunted air out thee oral opening
though congenital defect disallowed
returning merchandise back to sender
nor could blame be affixed

at either father nor mother
who both harbored the genetic mutation
now such admissions
re: aforementioned impediment allows,
enables and provides boasting rights
if in a mood to temper
any curiosity or satisfying a rumor
whispered down the alley,
whence I said “ah”
left nagging nincompoops
as if pie hole filled with a gobstopper.

If only had the world allowed me, to be myself..
I didn't have to sit alone, besides my shadow,
didn't have to hide from the world my true aficionado
If only had the world allowed me, to be myself..
my eyes would have been filled with shimmers and not tears.
my nights would have been filled with dinners and not lonely beers;
If only had the world allowed me, to be myself..
my arms didn't have to wrap around to hug my shoulders
my sanity wouldn't have been judged by apathetic beholders
If only had the world allowed me, to be myself..
I would have had the courage to express my love for you..
life would have ended up colorful and not in blue..

Fight for what you deserve
Keep going on & run
You're an aficionado of success
If you welcome aesthetics though!

Didn't have any schooling after turning 17,
Yet by the time he retired he was living in a home that he had designed.

He would run out in the middle of making lunch to chase squirrels from the bird feeder,
But you could give him a picture of one and could give you any info you wanted on it,
From scientific name to dietary needs.

Had an extensive liquor collection to make any aficionado green with envy,
And hadn't touched a drop since his first grandchild had been born.

And perhaps most shocking,
He owned and regularly operated a boat for 57 years,
And never learned how to swim.

He was the living contradiction,
And he is a contradiction to this day,
For even if he departed us some time ago,
He is still teaching me things.

Methinks, I post literary endeavors inxs
but tis with blood, sweat and tears
in case ye did not guess,
who struggles to craft reasonable rhyme
ideally read by a pleasing poetess.

Aye ***** nilly understate (trying to)
tantalize, hypnotize, galvanize...
with "FAKE" trumpeting
spellbinding, rambling, quivering...
intoxicating, hallucinating, gyrating,
stop to take a breather...

English Language vocabulary, a
fascination, intoxication, provocation...
upon me ocular, neurological, mental...
faculties of this nattering nabob
from outer limits of twilight zone
i.e. literary krazy Jewish jabberwocky

issuing haphazard global toll till
fallout exacting deserved ****
cratering nascent (inchoate) career
digitally/electronically bi:
ne'er re: carpet bombing

away upon modus operandi, sans
sesquipedalian shrapnel strafes wrought
realization literary scaffolding
complex edifice thought
out in mind of yours truly,
not popularly sought

opportunity to experience
rush of excitement,
asper choice winner equals naught
inexorable effort to cobble innovative
linkedin words disappointment fraught
submissions witness polite declinations

attesting, lamenting, regarding poetic
expansive glommed language, unlikely
success tubby brought
adulation, commendation, enunciation...
fades into afterthought.

Ablest adept adroit aficionado
applauded aspiring authors accorded
absolute badge because
brevity brews brilliant burnished
bravado bubbling budding bulwark
captivatingly collates, communicates,
constitutes conveys avast literary

Grand Canyon chiseled, sans scribe's
Colorado devoid, asper driven desperado
contrariwise, through prevalent
persistent pinterest proclivity,
plus plethora pronounced propensity

resoundingly regaling readers
re: raffish ridiculous rumination
renders endeavor incommunicado
diligent doggedness ironically -
dampens dueling dynamic dud

dutifully dramatically diminishing
divine dreaming skin deemed darling
distinguished doodling I sip
prose poe hit tick drafter
equally or exceeding
prospects envisioning El Dorado,

thus this 1% Neanderthal
bets his sweet bippy
and bottom dollar
febrile frenzy to fashion words
essentially relegated as dense bupkis
will automatically plummet
hook, line and sinker
10,000 leagues under the sea
accidentally discovered courtesy
scuba diver assisted by Octopus teacher.

He subjects unsuspecting readers
to lumbering lugubrious trademark
style saturing media airwaves,
thus instinctive immediate attribute
acutely sensing reasonable non-rhyme
heading directly to Davy Jones locker
years later discovered posthumously
and hailed as figurative
long lost sunken treasure
linkedin to the outstanding
ascribed to yours truly,
honorable Master scribe
among pantheon of great poets - ha
a run of the mill
schlepping logophile.

A maiden so pure and genuine,
Looking straight at the darkest part of the well,
The moon and the stars somber brightly,
Even it lit the cheerless and melancholic nightfall.

Standing still and a heart running in race,
Hugging an image of the quondam aficionado,
'Till tears streaming in her eyes,
As she remembers the old good times.

Whether she open and close her eyes,
The man in her dreams is seen in a distant,
Making a short return of how his smiles and look
Can melt her fragile heart.

The look that flatters her heart,
Those eyes so gentle and true,
The curve of his lips and the teeth that show,
Makes her cry in despair.

The stares that makes the world stop,
Left a mark in her deeply broken heart,
The stares that made her love him deeply,
She wish you'd look at her like you used to be.

If people eat chocolate , and junk fast food,
other people who smoke cigarettes , with copious  Alcohol,
addicts of drugs , *** deviants,
and worse, people who are aficionado's ,
of the British Royal family.

Then these people should make a pact,
an arrangement , with, Public Health Services,
Not to bother them , when things go wrong,
and they will go wrong , and they will be a burdon on us,
    On the Public purse

I hope they believe in a God,
and he will look after them ,
Because we can't , the purse is closed ,
shut , zipped up , welded, bolted down .

Michael Holly Barrett

Hugh Jackman's her favourite actor,
Loves movies with a time factor,
Unpretentious cinephile-
Free of meanness, free of guile.
Vine aficionado, her only bae
is the undeniably cute B. Calvillo.
Got glasses and made a discovery-
"This is how people really see?"
Lord of the Rings?
She can quote every line
In inception-themed Quizup,
there's no doubt that she'll shine.
Shockingly funny, good at math
humble and quite starkly frank
Vaishnavi S.:
(The dot is AFTER the S)
It's been an honour to be your friend
I hope we'll sustain this until the end.

I have come to sympathize with the at home workout enthusiast and the tv show aficionado

my sweater of preference is a black zip up hoody whose two front pockets carry my hands when I get too tired of hanging them at my sides
                              ...
I lounge like a lizard. When sun is at its peak, I walk into the yard and lay on the warm cement walkway that leads to the backyard. Toasty. An Argentinian tegu in another lifetime.
                             ...
I’m the only lizard who regulates it body temperature. Toasty when I want to be.
                             ...
I rappelled back down to the group. I was unfastening my harness when my instructor turned to me and said “ you must have  been a lizard in your past life.”