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"abnormal" poems
Mahal, tanda mo pa ba yung pangako ko, Yung pangako ko na mananatili ako sa tabi mo, Mahal, sinabi ko sayo na aalis lang ako pag sinabi mo, Kaya kong manatili sa piling mo kahit na nasasaktan na ako. Kahit na alam kong pampalipas oras mo lang ako nanatili parin ako, Tanga na kung tanga pakielam ko, Eh mahal kita, Kahit na alam kong wala na akong pag- asa, Kahit na alam ko na may mahal ka ng iba Nandito pa rin ako sa tabi mo at may ngiti sa labi ko, Hindi ko malaman kung saan ako nagkulang, O sadyang di mo lang makita yung halaga ko, Masakit man isipin na gwapo siya, May makinis na mukha Nakakahiya nga pag pinagtabi kami, Isang tingin sakanya tao talaga, Ako? Abnormal tingan walang wala kumpara sa kanya. At ito pa ang mas masakit pag lagi mo siyang kwento, Para kayong bumubuo ng mundo, Kung saan lahat ay perpekto, Ikaw at siya hindi nga maipagkakaila na perpekto nga, Alam mo ba na ang saya ko noong hawak ko ang iyong kamay, Para ako ay nasa ulap dahil sa lambot ng iyong kamay, Ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko para na nga akong mamatay, Nakakahiya pa nga eh pasmado yung kamay ko, Mas lalo akong natuwa nung di mo inagaw ang mga kamay mo na kayakap sakin, Pero sabi nga nila lahat ng saya ay pandalian at kalakip nito ay sakit, Simula noong nadaan natin siya, Ang mga kamay natin na magkayakap, Ay unti-unting nag hihiwalay ang pagkakayakap, Feeling ko nga rebound mo ako, Alam ko na walang tayo, Pero base sa mga pinapakita mo ay meron talagang ikaw at ako, Nag hahawak kamay, Nag yayakapan, Nag aaylabyuhan, Kulang na nga lang maghalikan eh, Pero lahat yun diko alam kung pangkaibigan lang o ibang level na, Akala ko nga may pag asa ako eh, May pag asang magkaroon ng titulong ikaw at ako, Mga akala na magiging masaya tayo, Ayan nanaman ako sa mga akala ko, Puro akala akala akala pero sa huli di nmn nag katotoo, Mahal kita,mahal kita,mahal kita yan ang paulit ulit kong gustong sabihin sayo, Syempre sasagutin mo rin ako na mahal kita, Ang saya saya pag lagi mo sinasabi na mahal mo rin ako, Pero napapaisip ako kung galing ba sa puso mo ang mga salitang binitawan mo, O napipilitan ka lang sabihin yon, Dahil advance ako mag-isip uunahan na kita, Mahal pasensya ka na ha, Kung hindi ko na matutupad yung mga pangako ko, Pangako na malapit na mapako, Hindi ko sinabi na diko matutupad, Pero parang papunta na, Sana wag mo kong hayaan umalis, Baka makita mo na lang ako nasa piling na ng iba, Pero sabagay pano mo nga pala ako makikita kung ang mga mata mo'y laging nakatuon sa kanya,
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Mar 24, 2019
Mar 24, 2019 at 10:35 AM UTC
Patuloy
Mahal, tanda mo pa ba yung pangako ko, Yung pangako ko na mananatili ako sa tabi mo, Mahal, sinabi ko sayo na aalis lang ako pag sinabi mo, Kaya kong manatili sa piling mo kahit na nasasaktan na ako. Kahit na alam kong pampalipas oras mo lang ako nanatili parin ako, Tanga na kung tanga pakielam ko, Eh mahal kita, Kahit na alam kong wala na akong pag- asa, Kahit na alam ko na may mahal ka ng iba Nandito pa rin ako sa tabi mo at may ngiti sa labi ko, Hindi ko malaman kung saan ako nagkulang, O sadyang di mo lang makita yung halaga ko, Masakit man isipin na gwapo siya, May makinis na mukha Nakakahiya nga pag pinagtabi kami, Isang tingin sakanya tao talaga, Ako? Abnormal tingan walang wala kumpara sa kanya. At ito pa ang mas masakit pag lagi mo siyang kwento, Para kayong bumubuo ng mundo, Kung saan lahat ay perpekto, Ikaw at siya hindi nga maipagkakaila na perpekto nga, Alam mo ba na ang saya ko noong hawak ko ang iyong kamay, Para ako ay nasa ulap dahil sa lambot ng iyong kamay, Ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko para na nga akong mamatay, Nakakahiya pa nga eh pasmado yung kamay ko, Mas lalo akong natuwa nung di mo inagaw ang mga kamay mo na kayakap sakin, Pero sabi nga nila lahat ng saya ay pandalian at kalakip nito ay sakit, Simula noong nadaan natin siya, Ang mga kamay natin na magkayakap, Ay unti-unting nag hihiwalay ang pagkakayakap, Feeling ko nga rebound mo ako, Alam ko na walang tayo, Pero base sa mga pinapakita mo ay meron talagang ikaw at ako, Nag hahawak kamay, Nag yayakapan, Nag aaylabyuhan, Kulang na nga lang maghalikan eh, Pero lahat yun diko alam kung pangkaibigan lang o ibang level na, Akala ko nga may pag asa ako eh, May pag asang magkaroon ng titulong ikaw at ako, Mga akala na magiging masaya tayo, Ayan nanaman ako sa mga akala ko, Puro akala akala akala pero sa huli di nmn nag katotoo, Mahal kita,mahal kita,mahal kita yan ang paulit ulit kong gustong sabihin sayo, Syempre sasagutin mo rin ako na mahal kita, Ang saya saya pag lagi mo sinasabi na mahal mo rin ako, Pero napapaisip ako kung galing ba sa puso mo ang mga salitang binitawan mo, O napipilitan ka lang sabihin yon, Dahil advance ako mag-isip uunahan na kita, Mahal pasensya ka na ha, Kung hindi ko na matutupad yung mga pangako ko, Pangako na malapit na mapako, Hindi ko sinabi na diko matutupad, Pero parang papunta na, Sana wag mo kong hayaan umalis, Baka makita mo na lang ako nasa piling na ng iba, Pero sabagay pano mo nga pala ako makikita kung ang mga mata mo'y laging nakatuon sa kanya,
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57
sana nandito ka para nayayakap  kita, sana nandito ka para mahagkan ka, sana kahit kaunting oras lang  makasama ka, mapakita ko lang kung gaano ka kahalaga. sana noon pa kita nakilala, sana naunahan ko sya, di ka sana nasaktan at lumuha, sa pagtataksil at mali nyang nagawa. sana nabuo ako ng mas maaga, baka sakaling nakilala kita, hindi man kita masyadong mapasaya, pero gagawin ko ang lahat para ika'y mapaligaya. sana hindi nalang naging komplikado, baka sakaling maipag mamalaki mo ko, baka masabi mo na ako talaga ang mahal mo, walang biro at hindi nag tatago. sana hindi nalang kita nakilala, para hindi na tayo nahihirapang dalawa, pero salamat parin at dumating ka, dahil tinuruan mo kong wag magpakatanga sakanya. sana pinigilan ko nalang nararamdaman ko sayo, para hindi ako luluha kapag iniwan mo, sana hindi kita pinakinggan noong nagkagulo, edi sana ngayon malaya na tayo. sana kung may mag babalik ng nakaraan, mas pipiliin kong manahimik nalang, hindi magsasalita ng tunay na nararamdaman, para sa huli wala ng nasasaktan. alam kong minahal mo ko ng sobra, pero hindi mo ba naisip  na mas mahal kita, mas pipiliin kong maging masaya sila, kaysa sa kaligayahan nating dalawa. pero sa tuwing bibitawan na kita, hindi mo alam kung gaano kasakit na mawalay ka, kahit pigilan kong huwag pumatak ang mga luha, wala akong magawa dahil kusa silang nagwawala. sa rami ng pag subok na nalagpasan, alam kong hindi pa iyon ang katapusan, marami pang darating at dapat pag handaan, ngunit di ko alam kung kaya ko pang labanan. hindi ko alam kung naubos na ba ang luha ko sa kaiiyak, dahil sa tuwing may problema ni isang butil walang pumapatak, sanay na siguro ako sa relasyong ito, panay iyak, away at gulo. mahal kita kaya pilit kong kinakalimutan mga pangyayari, kahit magulo,  alam kong sa puso mo ako'y bawing bawi, hindi kita iiwan ano man ang mangyari, kung iiwan man kita asahan **** ako ay uuwi. pagpasensyahan mo na kung abnormal ako minsan, ganto talaga ako pero masarap mag mahal, minsan ka ng iniwan ngunit di ka kakalimutan, bihira ka lang makahanap ng katulad ko na mapag mahal. alam kong masasakit ang lahat ng Sanang nasabi ko, isip ang may gusto ngunit puso'y binabago, sana tama ang puso kong manatili sayo, sayo mahal ko , puso ko' y sinakop mo. #love #chances
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Sep 29, 2016
Sep 29, 2016 at 4:49 AM UTC
SANA
sana nandito ka para nayayakap  kita, sana nandito ka para mahagkan ka, sana kahit kaunting oras lang  makasama ka, mapakita ko lang kung gaano ka kahalaga. sana noon pa kita nakilala, sana naunahan ko sya, di ka sana nasaktan at lumuha, sa pagtataksil at mali nyang nagawa. sana nabuo ako ng mas maaga, baka sakaling nakilala kita, hindi man kita masyadong mapasaya, pero gagawin ko ang lahat para ika'y mapaligaya. sana hindi nalang naging komplikado, baka sakaling maipag mamalaki mo ko, baka masabi mo na ako talaga ang mahal mo, walang biro at hindi nag tatago. sana hindi nalang kita nakilala, para hindi na tayo nahihirapang dalawa, pero salamat parin at dumating ka, dahil tinuruan mo kong wag magpakatanga sakanya. sana pinigilan ko nalang nararamdaman ko sayo, para hindi ako luluha kapag iniwan mo, sana hindi kita pinakinggan noong nagkagulo, edi sana ngayon malaya na tayo. sana kung may mag babalik ng nakaraan, mas pipiliin kong manahimik nalang, hindi magsasalita ng tunay na nararamdaman, para sa huli wala ng nasasaktan. alam kong minahal mo ko ng sobra, pero hindi mo ba naisip  na mas mahal kita, mas pipiliin kong maging masaya sila, kaysa sa kaligayahan nating dalawa. pero sa tuwing bibitawan na kita, hindi mo alam kung gaano kasakit na mawalay ka, kahit pigilan kong huwag pumatak ang mga luha, wala akong magawa dahil kusa silang nagwawala. sa rami ng pag subok na nalagpasan, alam kong hindi pa iyon ang katapusan, marami pang darating at dapat pag handaan, ngunit di ko alam kung kaya ko pang labanan. hindi ko alam kung naubos na ba ang luha ko sa kaiiyak, dahil sa tuwing may problema ni isang butil walang pumapatak, sanay na siguro ako sa relasyong ito, panay iyak, away at gulo. mahal kita kaya pilit kong kinakalimutan mga pangyayari, kahit magulo,  alam kong sa puso mo ako'y bawing bawi, hindi kita iiwan ano man ang mangyari, kung iiwan man kita asahan **** ako ay uuwi. pagpasensyahan mo na kung abnormal ako minsan, ganto talaga ako pero masarap mag mahal, minsan ka ng iniwan ngunit di ka kakalimutan, bihira ka lang makahanap ng katulad ko na mapag mahal. alam kong masasakit ang lahat ng Sanang nasabi ko, isip ang may gusto ngunit puso'y binabago, sana tama ang puso kong manatili sayo, sayo mahal ko , puso ko' y sinakop mo. #love #chances
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58
Naranasan mo na bang magkaroon ng crush? Siyempre oo! Sino ba naman ang hindi mararanasan iyon? Sabi mga nila, abnormal saw ang walang crush. Minsan sila ang dahilan kung bakit ka nag-aaral ng maayos. Sila ang dahilan kung bakit ka nag-aayos ng buhok, nagpupulbos, pumoporma, at marami pang iba. Siyempre, para saan ba iyon? Para magustuhan ka o kaya ay mapansin. Minsan mga kahit simpleng pagsasabi sa iyo ng crush mo ng "hi" ay halos mabugbog mo na iyong katabi o kaya ang kaibigan mo sa sobrang kilig. Pero minsan, hindi mo maiwasang magselos sa mga ka-close niya. Grabe, di ba? Kahit simpleng crush lang iyon, nagseselos ka pa rin, at minsan dumarating sa time na kailangang mag-move on kahit wala kayong relasyon. Pero paano kapag nalaman mo na may syota pala siya? Kahit crush mo lang, siyempre masakit pa rin. Kasi umasa ka rin naman na sana magustuhan ka niya. Bakit ka umaasa? Dahil nadala ka sa imagination mo, like magiging kayo o liligawan ka niya. Hindi naman lahat ng imagination ay nagkakatotoo. Sabihin naging 30% pwedeng magkatotoo pero 70% pa rin ang imposible. Kaya mga sabi nila, "Expectation is the root of all heartaches." Dapat matuto tayong kpntoplin ang sariling nararamdaman dahil hindi lahat ng gusto natin ay makukuha natin. Ang pag-ibig ay kusang darating dahil bawat tao ay may nakalaang makakasama habangbuhay. Mga bata pa tayo para royan, Hindi pa natin kayang buhayin ang sarili natin. May oras na dapat itabi ang mga pansarili at unahin ang makabubuti.
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Jun 18, 2018
Jun 18, 2018 at 1:42 AM UTC
Pag-ibig Ng Kabataan ...
Naranasan mo na bang magkaroon ng crush? Siyempre oo! Sino ba naman ang hindi mararanasan iyon? Sabi mga nila, abnormal saw ang walang crush. Minsan sila ang dahilan kung bakit ka nag-aaral ng maayos. Sila ang dahilan kung bakit ka nag-aayos ng buhok, nagpupulbos, pumoporma, at marami pang iba. Siyempre, para saan ba iyon? Para magustuhan ka o kaya ay mapansin. Minsan mga kahit simpleng pagsasabi sa iyo ng crush mo ng "hi" ay halos mabugbog mo na iyong katabi o kaya ang kaibigan mo sa sobrang kilig. Pero minsan, hindi mo maiwasang magselos sa mga ka-close niya. Grabe, di ba? Kahit simpleng crush lang iyon, nagseselos ka pa rin, at minsan dumarating sa time na kailangang mag-move on kahit wala kayong relasyon. Pero paano kapag nalaman mo na may syota pala siya? Kahit crush mo lang, siyempre masakit pa rin. Kasi umasa ka rin naman na sana magustuhan ka niya. Bakit ka umaasa? Dahil nadala ka sa imagination mo, like magiging kayo o liligawan ka niya. Hindi naman lahat ng imagination ay nagkakatotoo. Sabihin naging 30% pwedeng magkatotoo pero 70% pa rin ang imposible. Kaya mga sabi nila, "Expectation is the root of all heartaches." Dapat matuto tayong kpntoplin ang sariling nararamdaman dahil hindi lahat ng gusto natin ay makukuha natin. Ang pag-ibig ay kusang darating dahil bawat tao ay may nakalaang makakasama habangbuhay. Mga bata pa tayo para royan, Hindi pa natin kayang buhayin ang sarili natin. May oras na dapat itabi ang mga pansarili at unahin ang makabubuti.
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12
My eyes are black, My heart is cold, self-hatred is radiating from within my soul, the mirror reflects what i don't want to see i hate every single aspect about me from my abnormal eyes to my ugly, fat thighs see, i hate myself too probably even more than you.
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Apr 6, 2014
Apr 6, 2014 at 7:45 PM UTC
Self-hate
there was a time before when I could walk I stepped among strangers on misguided paths on roads unnamed remaining cracked and broken people hid their blank faces steps incautiously taken but there was one abnormal stranger he lifted his eyes above the ground and smiled at the unfortunate raindrops then suddenly I was falling he held vivid color in his eyes life in his dreams the world was dark and bleak yet illuminated by his love my feet have never touched solid ground since and they never will remaining to search for such reason the reason his love can be shown to only I
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Nov 10, 2014
Nov 10, 2014 at 7:54 PM UTC
Unfortunate Raindrops
Hey everyone, I wanted you all to know That I went to rehab No, not drug rehab ****** addiction rehab Much more...I don't know, Abnormal? I want you to know this Because I love you And I don't care What kind of **** you've been through Or how ****** up you are I am too I've been close to a lot And I'm sure if I knew your whole, I would love you the same, If not even more Because vulnerability is beautiful Wear your heart inside out You won't scare me And if you scare someone else, well, Now you know who they are
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Nov 6, 2014
Nov 6, 2014 at 8:04 PM UTC
Vulnerability
Rhythm of life Nails tapping on table tops Beating of our hearts spin the world right off its axis. Momma shot a man in Reno Just to watch him die. Atlas shrugged And we all tripped as we walked The pace of our mile, off by 3.6 seconds. Trust in our stated axioms Disillusioned Americans in Paris Judged by the color of our skins and the shoes on our feet No one stops to see how blue it is up there today. Hurrying through the rain Our cities never sleep. Going down South It’s slower down here. Sunday’s best and “God Loves You” stickers when you get your oil changed. Night train whistle blows Factory steam pipes squeal Mississippi riverboats tug and chug Dictionary.com definitions let us down. Greatest disasters in history are when thing we take perfectly for granted stop working. Mad cow, mad hatter, mad world Bad boys, bad wine, bad date Ellipses, dot dot dots, dramatic pause, passing of time passing of time passing of…. …….. …………. ……………………. Time. Tw— Twi— Twitch. (tick tick tick) I believe in the abnormal And the impossible And I refuse to believe that fictional characters aren’t real Animals completely understand me When I talk to them. Baby missiles fire From all parts of the globe End of the world party Let’s go down in glorious drunkenness As the beating of our hearts Spins the world right off its axis.
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Jun 13, 2012
Jun 13, 2012 at 11:34 AM UTC
This is the Way the World Ends, Not with a Whimper, but a Bang
Sitting in the local coffee shop, Listening to coffee shop songs, Doing work but simultaneously Watching people. Studying psychology, Of the abnormal type, Watching behaviors, But not reflecting inward. Sipping hot coffee, Burning your mouth on it, But trying not to react. Someone across the cafe saw you; **** Studying people, Drinking coffee nonchalantly, Watching behavior, Reflect inward, ****** Reflect inward.
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Sep 9, 2015
Sep 9, 2015 at 7:48 AM UTC
Reflect Inward
When I hear the words "abusive relationship" I think of the gruesome pictures of women battered and bleeding that they showed to us in health class. They forget that not all wounds are so easily seen. not MY relationship. I would never fall victim to such a horrific cycle, of emotional abuse. Sure he screamed and called me every name in the book, but at the end of every night he swore he loved me. And sure he kept tabs on me at all times, and my friendships began to fade into the background, but he just worried, which meant he cared. ...right? not MY relationship. Sometimes we become so invested and fall so deeply in love, that we become numb to the pain. The abnormal becomes normal. And the punishment that you so often receive, you begin to believe is deserved. MY relationship. I hesitate to call it abusive, maybe because it has such a horrifying ring to it. Maybe it's denial. But whatever it is, it took me 3 years to finally break the cycle.
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Jun 8, 2014
Jun 8, 2014 at 2:53 PM UTC
Abusive?
twisted clown, metal chains video games getting old, dying life quiet animals water goddess, she’s a mistress she’s abnormal still alive, they gonna eat us… **** us I hate it when everyone else is oh
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Sep 4, 2014
Sep 4, 2014 at 9:18 AM UTC
OH
The arrogance of the men and their violence in all possible forms – completely everyday or extraordinary, subtle or extreme, considered as being normal or abnormal – depend on this, of course, that they are either denied or justified from the perpetrators of the violence themselves. But also by the women in any way glossed over, excused or forgiven, which from childhood to the present day, in Western countries too, has been brainwashed thoroughly, which means: shut up, be obedient and offer no resistance. © Barbara-Paraprem, 2015
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May 8, 2015
May 8, 2015 at 9:15 PM UTC
THE ARROGANCE OF THE MEN AND THEIR VIOLENCE
I stand a moment and gaze at my cloud of thoughts What comes to mind is limitless;it is all sorts The third hand seems dishonest. For to love is a risk that one must be modest Concealed in my heart I hide the truth of my being I am not proud; but I am not satisfied to be fleeing A cynical cycle, which  appears with a paradox ending One should knot their laces now than later for pending How can I ever be such a mockery that I hesitate, but rather be called a fool I hate to feel abnormal with friends ,when I act like a tool I cannot release this barrier that will restrict my trust The matter has developed as an infant where bullying was a must
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Dec 17, 2014
Dec 17, 2014 at 10:36 AM UTC
Trust issues
This feeling is so abnormal for me I'm used to 3 main emotions Happy, Sad and Angry This new one is frightnening I'm not happy with you but I'm not angry or sad either And it's a bit scary but I want to talk to you about it Without screaming or using the words "we need to talk" Definitly not the words "I'm done" I just want to tell you what's going on in my brain I think your doing something wrong, Or we are But it isn't something I can put my finger on Or maybe I can, But I don't know baby I guess I'm just upset.
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Jul 2, 2013
Jul 2, 2013 at 10:45 PM UTC
Upset
if words are food for the mind, then here is a glimpse of mine if words are drugs for the brain, then here is why i'm so pained. abandoned, abhorrent abnormal, absent abstract, abuse addicted, anxious betray, bitterly blank, blasphemy bloodless, breakdown breathless, brutal captive, casually catastrophe, cautiously change, cigarettes crucial, clueless damaged, dangerous deadly, disastrous disheartened, disconcerting dramatic, dreading eager, eccentric ecstasy, eerie effete, effortless embittered, excess faded, failure faintly, fallacy faltering, fatally fearfully, finally garbage, gawky gibberish, gloomy gone, goodbye graphic, gratify hallucinate, harshly hazy, heartless hectic, helpless hesitant, hit-and-miss idiotic, idly ignorant, intimacy illogical, imaginative infatuated, intoxicated jealousy, jittery journey, journal joylessly, judicial junk, juvenile keen, killing knavish, knocking knockout, knotty knowingly, knowledge laborious, lacking lame, languishing lifeless, literature lovelorn, lugubrious madness, maintenance make-believe, malaise mean, melancholic mellow, melodramatic naff, naivety nameless, naturally nauseous, nebulous neglected, nervous oasis, objectionable obliged, obliterate oblivion, obscurity obsolete, one-and-only pacifist, pained pale, panicky paradise, paralyze passionately, passively raging, ranting rationalize, raving realistic, reasonable rebellious, reckless saboteur, sadness sake, sameness sanity, satisfactory scar, steady taint, tangled tasteless, tearful telling, temperamental terror, theoretical unaffected, uncanny uncommon, unconsciously undesirable, uneasy unfortunate, untidy vaguely, vanish vanity, vanquish versatile, vicious violence, voracious waiting, waking walkout, wanting wasteful, weary withering, wrecking if words are food for the mind, then you've seen a glimpse of mine if words are drugs for the brain, then no wonder i'm so pained. -djs
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Aug 5, 2013
Aug 5, 2013 at 11:21 PM UTC
a glimpse of my mind
if words are food for the mind, then here is a glimpse of mine if words are drugs for the brain, then here is why i'm so pained. abandoned, abhorrent abnormal, absent abstract, abuse addicted, anxious betray, bitterly blank, blasphemy bloodless, breakdown breathless, brutal captive, casually catastrophe, cautiously change, cigarettes crucial, clueless damaged, dangerous deadly, disastrous disheartened, disconcerting dramatic, dreading eager, eccentric ecstasy, eerie effete, effortless embittered, excess faded, failure faintly, fallacy faltering, fatally fearfully, finally garbage, gawky gibberish, gloomy gone, goodbye graphic, gratify hallucinate, harshly hazy, heartless hectic, helpless hesitant, hit-and-miss idiotic, idly ignorant, intimacy illogical, imaginative infatuated, intoxicated jealousy, jittery journey, journal joylessly, judicial junk, juvenile keen, killing knavish, knocking knockout, knotty knowingly, knowledge laborious, lacking lame, languishing lifeless, literature lovelorn, lugubrious madness, maintenance make-believe, malaise mean, melancholic mellow, melodramatic naff, naivety nameless, naturally nauseous, nebulous neglected, nervous oasis, objectionable obliged, obliterate oblivion, obscurity obsolete, one-and-only pacifist, pained pale, panicky paradise, paralyze passionately, passively raging, ranting rationalize, raving realistic, reasonable rebellious, reckless saboteur, sadness sake, sameness sanity, satisfactory scar, steady taint, tangled tasteless, tearful telling, temperamental terror, theoretical unaffected, uncanny uncommon, unconsciously undesirable, uneasy unfortunate, untidy vaguely, vanish vanity, vanquish versatile, vicious violence, voracious waiting, waking walkout, wanting wasteful, weary withering, wrecking if words are food for the mind, then you've seen a glimpse of mine if words are drugs for the brain, then no wonder i'm so pained. -djs
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97
(Holding fire and water together) I don't know why the rain keeps writing the name of Nigeria on the ground in every corner. I don't know why we are this broken and tortured like the fragments of the dust. I don't know why the Dapchi girls returned yesterday while their chikbok friends are still in captive. I don't know why every street in Nigeria is known with an imprint of good leaders. I don't know why we cry yet point accusation. fingers back to ourselves, who is fooling who? I don't know why the sun cry here with a closed lips. I don't know why we keep writing love stories while our brothers and sisters perish in shame! I don't just know why but I think you should know. Are you not the one that collected a cup of rice, clean notes and Abrahamic lie from them? I won't speak ill of this land again, I won't! I won't judge any one, no, I won't for the sake of my unborn children. No, I won't for the sake of what happened to Dele Giwa and Saro Wiwa. We poets are abnormal psychologically. We paints abstraction from the abstracts creating fears that might hurt those true patriots. My muse fell out from me yesterday night, When my television opened to a scene of genocide. Men on pants, women on trousers painting out the tears made for people inhabiting hell. Their laughters and smiles were printed to be archived among themselves. I won't speak ill of this country, no, I won't! Because of my unborn children, I won't! But I will tell just one tale for them to remember Of how monkeys carted away with our monies! Of how Snake swallowed our currency! Of how good our leaders are, I think you know! I have been holding these demons in me until last night they came out horribly in fierce protest to revisit this land again. To tell of those girls ***** under the bridge, To ask why boys like me are named after me, To speak against shadows of death lurking here and there. Nigeria is grey and black, red and violent, Retrieving this oceans of mysteries from the hidden abyss of grave corruption is the passport tabled on the pyramid top to recreate a versatile muses of a lyrics calling for a right to write our rights. Take a walk to memory lane pass your shadow, that of your father, mother & grandmas You will see a Nigeria in another angle trying to free herself from the grip of corruption, then, revisit her tears and struggles you will know we are the cause of our own misfortunes.! ©John Chizoba Vincent From_A_Pen_Refusing_Frustrations
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Jun 30, 2018
Jun 30, 2018 at 5:00 PM UTC
Re-Visiting Nigeria
(Holding fire and water together) I don't know why the rain keeps writing the name of Nigeria on the ground in every corner. I don't know why we are this broken and tortured like the fragments of the dust. I don't know why the Dapchi girls returned yesterday while their chikbok friends are still in captive. I don't know why every street in Nigeria is known with an imprint of good leaders. I don't know why we cry yet point accusation. fingers back to ourselves, who is fooling who? I don't know why the sun cry here with a closed lips. I don't know why we keep writing love stories while our brothers and sisters perish in shame! I don't just know why but I think you should know. Are you not the one that collected a cup of rice, clean notes and Abrahamic lie from them? I won't speak ill of this land again, I won't! I won't judge any one, no, I won't for the sake of my unborn children. No, I won't for the sake of what happened to Dele Giwa and Saro Wiwa. We poets are abnormal psychologically. We paints abstraction from the abstracts creating fears that might hurt those true patriots. My muse fell out from me yesterday night, When my television opened to a scene of genocide. Men on pants, women on trousers painting out the tears made for people inhabiting hell. Their laughters and smiles were printed to be archived among themselves. I won't speak ill of this country, no, I won't! Because of my unborn children, I won't! But I will tell just one tale for them to remember Of how monkeys carted away with our monies! Of how Snake swallowed our currency! Of how good our leaders are, I think you know! I have been holding these demons in me until last night they came out horribly in fierce protest to revisit this land again. To tell of those girls ***** under the bridge, To ask why boys like me are named after me, To speak against shadows of death lurking here and there. Nigeria is grey and black, red and violent, Retrieving this oceans of mysteries from the hidden abyss of grave corruption is the passport tabled on the pyramid top to recreate a versatile muses of a lyrics calling for a right to write our rights. Take a walk to memory lane pass your shadow, that of your father, mother & grandmas You will see a Nigeria in another angle trying to free herself from the grip of corruption, then, revisit her tears and struggles you will know we are the cause of our own misfortunes.! ©John Chizoba Vincent From_A_Pen_Refusing_Frustrations
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Seeing you first thing in the morning is like looking through a kaleidoscope. I cant really tell what I'm looking at because my vision is so blurry, but-my god is it beautiful. I don't get to wake up to you as often as I'd like. But when I do, I look to my left, or to my right- depending on how much shifting I've done in the middle of the night- and I say.. "Oh goodness, this pillow looks like her." But then I realize that it is you. I had just forgotten where I am because waking up to you is so abnormal. Then- What comes next is the wave of nerves, and I mean WAVE OF NERVES- that comes over me when you purse your lips- trying not to smile back at me. I can't help- but to throw at you, an endless string of generic compliments- like- "You are, so beautiful" Or- "You look so good without makeup" But they aren't generic to me- Because they are true. But then I say something really ******* stupid. Like- "Your nails....... feel like.. nails" Ironically- Nails, is a word with a couple different meanings. Like- Fingernails. Hammer and nails. And like how I just nailed you. But hey- I put just as much time nailing you, as a man would, hammering nails into the beams of a house that he is building for his own family. Not that you took a really long time- Or I want to put a family inside you- But- You are a masterpiece. What I'm trying to say, Is that aside from your brilliant mental composure- Your thousands of beautiful blurry reflective faces- And your superb taste in men- Example being me... You are wonderful, And I look forward to building more houses with you in the future. We could have a castle with a mote. We can have a pet dragon. As long as I have light- And a thousand busted mirrors in a tube- I will be yours. Even if the kaleidoscope doesn't see that far. I will be yours.
0
May 23, 2014
May 23, 2014 at 8:45 PM UTC
Kaleidoscope
Seeing you first thing in the morning is like looking through a kaleidoscope. I cant really tell what I'm looking at because my vision is so blurry, but-my god is it beautiful. I don't get to wake up to you as often as I'd like. But when I do, I look to my left, or to my right- depending on how much shifting I've done in the middle of the night- and I say.. "Oh goodness, this pillow looks like her." But then I realize that it is you. I had just forgotten where I am because waking up to you is so abnormal. Then- What comes next is the wave of nerves, and I mean WAVE OF NERVES- that comes over me when you purse your lips- trying not to smile back at me. I can't help- but to throw at you, an endless string of generic compliments- like- "You are, so beautiful" Or- "You look so good without makeup" But they aren't generic to me- Because they are true. But then I say something really ******* stupid. Like- "Your nails....... feel like.. nails" Ironically- Nails, is a word with a couple different meanings. Like- Fingernails. Hammer and nails. And like how I just nailed you. But hey- I put just as much time nailing you, as a man would, hammering nails into the beams of a house that he is building for his own family. Not that you took a really long time- Or I want to put a family inside you- But- You are a masterpiece. What I'm trying to say, Is that aside from your brilliant mental composure- Your thousands of beautiful blurry reflective faces- And your superb taste in men- Example being me... You are wonderful, And I look forward to building more houses with you in the future. We could have a castle with a mote. We can have a pet dragon. As long as I have light- And a thousand busted mirrors in a tube- I will be yours. Even if the kaleidoscope doesn't see that far. I will be yours.
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Hearts sinking This pain no longer a threat, Only certain tragedy. They say, "Risk it all." To have your heart torn apart. Surgery. No Anesthetic. Mission: Find the bleeding parts. Abnormal. Ice. No warmth. You find heat. Give away pieces. Turn to stone. Then repeat.
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Aug 20, 2012
Aug 20, 2012 at 2:58 PM UTC
Hearts are Sinking
To be quite honest this Concept is strange to Me I'm just Myself but To others my Mind is abnormal I ponder things other Couldn't care less about I understand concepts most People ignore And yet I feel stupid quite often Much of my mind is unexplored I daren't venture into the Cavernous chambers of Scorn I have for myself and Those who aren't intelligent because Who am I to think myself Superior to anyone?
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Sep 27, 2016
Sep 27, 2016 at 10:15 PM UTC
To be an intellectual
Walls and gates kept her away from what she needed but didn't want Beds of white cotton submerged in what she thought she didn't feel Dusty pens in a dusty cup on a dusty desk She hammered at armor that she had been hammering at for years since she was a young child binding the pieces but secretly looking for cracks to break out of Kicking *** and taking names but throwing the names away Ripping keys out of the typewriter Every fifth letter scratched into porcelain skin Soap stripping her of what made her normal But there is no normal She was still abnormal Trying to open herself to let the oxygen-free blood stain her outline so she could be seen for a moment Just one moment and then get erased by everyone else like always She wanted to fly and shine but there were others already shining and flying Sun flashing and illuminating her skeleton Her skin transparent while lit by the sun Her heartbeat skipped and stopped and faltered She tried to lose herself in everything she could You could say she was selfish but you could say she just wanted to be found, though, by the right person There is no right person because anyone can break a shell but nobody cares enough to see what kind of radiance will light up the universe Nobody cares that with every single word she is thrown through windshields Shards of glass scathing her inside and out Drowning in pristine lakes of beautiful love and joy How painful to not be able to inhale while drowning in pristine lakes of lovely happiness She could feel the currents rushing past her fingers but couldnt hold on But she wanted to She wanted to hold on
0
Jun 16, 2012
Jun 16, 2012 at 8:01 PM UTC
Cruise Ships
Walls and gates kept her away from what she needed but didn't want Beds of white cotton submerged in what she thought she didn't feel Dusty pens in a dusty cup on a dusty desk She hammered at armor that she had been hammering at for years since she was a young child binding the pieces but secretly looking for cracks to break out of Kicking *** and taking names but throwing the names away Ripping keys out of the typewriter Every fifth letter scratched into porcelain skin Soap stripping her of what made her normal But there is no normal She was still abnormal Trying to open herself to let the oxygen-free blood stain her outline so she could be seen for a moment Just one moment and then get erased by everyone else like always She wanted to fly and shine but there were others already shining and flying Sun flashing and illuminating her skeleton Her skin transparent while lit by the sun Her heartbeat skipped and stopped and faltered She tried to lose herself in everything she could You could say she was selfish but you could say she just wanted to be found, though, by the right person There is no right person because anyone can break a shell but nobody cares enough to see what kind of radiance will light up the universe Nobody cares that with every single word she is thrown through windshields Shards of glass scathing her inside and out Drowning in pristine lakes of beautiful love and joy How painful to not be able to inhale while drowning in pristine lakes of lovely happiness She could feel the currents rushing past her fingers but couldnt hold on But she wanted to She wanted to hold on
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If you are having sleepless nights, blame it on calcium deficiency as a key calcium channel has been identified as responsible for deep sleep, says new study. The study also gives us a clue to understanding both normal and abnormal waking brain functions. "It is the same brain, same neurons and similar requirements for oxygen and so on. So what is the difference between these two states?" asked Rodolfo Llinas, a professor of neuroscience at New York University School of Medicine and a Whitman Center Investigator at the Marine Biological Laboratory (MBL) in Woods Hole. To tackle the broad question of sleep, Llinas and his colleagues focused on one crucial part of the puzzle in mice, Marine Biological Laboratory. Calcium channels, selective gates in neuron walls, are integral in neuron firing, ensuring that all parts of the brain keep talking to one other. But during sleep, calcium channel activity is increased, keeping a slow rhythm that is different from patterns found during wakefulness. Based on this clue, the scientists removed one type of calcium channel, Cav3.1, and looked at how the absence of that channel's activity affected mouse brain function. This calcium channel turns out to be a key player in normal sleep. The mice without working Cav3.1 calcium channels took longer to fall asleep than normal mice, and stayed asleep for much shorter periods. Their brain activity was also abnormal, more like normal wakefulness than sleep. Most importantly, these mice never reached deep, slow-wave sleep. "This means that we have discovered that Cav3.1 is the channel that ultimately supports deep sleep," Llinas said. Because these mice completely lack the ability to sleep deeply, they eventually express a syndrome similar to psychiatric disorders in humans.Read more here:www.marieaustralia.com/green-formal-dresses | www.marieaustralia.com/yellow-formal-dresses
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Jul 1, 2015
Jul 1, 2015 at 12:46 AM UTC
Calcium is essential for deep sleep: Study
If you are having sleepless nights, blame it on calcium deficiency as a key calcium channel has been identified as responsible for deep sleep, says new study. The study also gives us a clue to understanding both normal and abnormal waking brain functions. "It is the same brain, same neurons and similar requirements for oxygen and so on. So what is the difference between these two states?" asked Rodolfo Llinas, a professor of neuroscience at New York University School of Medicine and a Whitman Center Investigator at the Marine Biological Laboratory (MBL) in Woods Hole. To tackle the broad question of sleep, Llinas and his colleagues focused on one crucial part of the puzzle in mice, Marine Biological Laboratory. Calcium channels, selective gates in neuron walls, are integral in neuron firing, ensuring that all parts of the brain keep talking to one other. But during sleep, calcium channel activity is increased, keeping a slow rhythm that is different from patterns found during wakefulness. Based on this clue, the scientists removed one type of calcium channel, Cav3.1, and looked at how the absence of that channel's activity affected mouse brain function. This calcium channel turns out to be a key player in normal sleep. The mice without working Cav3.1 calcium channels took longer to fall asleep than normal mice, and stayed asleep for much shorter periods. Their brain activity was also abnormal, more like normal wakefulness than sleep. Most importantly, these mice never reached deep, slow-wave sleep. "This means that we have discovered that Cav3.1 is the channel that ultimately supports deep sleep," Llinas said. Because these mice completely lack the ability to sleep deeply, they eventually express a syndrome similar to psychiatric disorders in humans.Read more here:www.marieaustralia.com/green-formal-dresses | www.marieaustralia.com/yellow-formal-dresses
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Consequences: made for learning lessons I convert unlearned lessons Turned to abnormal blessings Stretching the truth to hold you Pricked by your gorgeous daze I bleed profusely, yet don’t turn away The love I swore to keep My blood tells other tales Intoxicated from your smell Continuing to caress your sides Wincing in pain Feeling as if there’s something to gain No end to my quest in sight Finding the rose I thought I would need Loving the one that caused me to bleed
0
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 12:56 PM UTC
Thorns
I take a deep breath to staunch That constant clang and clatter Be still and follow the hunch Before it’s too late to matter I need a quiet place A shift in space, a change in stealth My next breath can create Some room to gaze at something else Soon I must take a break I can’t settle down or think straight Wrestling with those demons I know not the time or the date Looking back looks so abnormal Deadly games of Red Rover Spawning pages from my journals Replaying over and over I know not steps to take On pathways for planting the seed Peace, her elusive face Turns away whenever I plead Time to build that Safe House Only I have the key to the door Where peace and bliss abounds I meet each holy moment and soar Seek a new vision there And learn to think more about others Let go my tormented memories Seeing All-my Sisters and Brothers I find that peaceful space Just to release what I don’t need Harmony-Beauty-Love Replaces all my soul has freed Filling up my Heart Space As soft as a sweet baby’s kiss Some name the feeling Grace I feel a sense of peace and bliss
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Mar 23, 2016
Mar 23, 2016 at 4:28 PM UTC
I Need a Quiet Place
In my attempt to be clever and witty I have written you a poem. For you to read and pick apart. It will start with a catchy title that will then bring you to the opening sentence. In my attempt to be clever and witty I have written you a poem. If this poem catches your eye, you will read Michelle Rose to figure out worthiness of a follow or a like. If this is uninteresting you won’t even bother to finish reading. It will end with a clever remark that could be considered sarcasm, just as the rest of the poem could have been. You will then wonder to yourself, why did I just read that, and what the hell is that second to last stanza supposed to mean? Or maybe you won’t do any of this because you’re a normal person. Did I just call you abnormal? Sometimes I like to read in the dark too… a clever remark that could be considered sarcasm, Just as the rest of the poem could have been.
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Mar 21, 2013
Mar 21, 2013 at 8:31 PM UTC
a catchy title
She looked at her mother. Her mother’s dead body to be more specific. She wanted to cry and scream. But all she could do was stare at what is in the coffin. A body. It belonged to someone she once knew. Her mother. People were rushing past her. It is a funeral after all. Too many things to be done. And no one really could ask her to do anything. She was stiff as a stone. Pretty useless anyway. Always have been. Never knew what the right things to do socially were. That used to be one of the problems her mother had with her. Her poor mother. She gave birth to an alien. Someone who wasn’t normal. She looked human outside but inside her daughter could not be more different to her. Not only to her but pretty much an alien to the whole planet. She didn’t know how to behave or dress up in social events. How much her mother wanted a daughter who was pretty so she can flaunt her daughter everywhere? How much she wanted a daughter who did not always argue with her? How much she wanted a daughter who loved house chores and enjoyed shopping? How much she wanted a child who was just like everyone else? There were countless days her mother scolded the God. All her mother ever wanted was a normal child. She didn’t have the strength to handle this abnormal child who is nothing but a burden. Fortunately, her mother does not have to worry about that anymore. She has left this ‘burden’ to fend for herself now. If only ‘this burden’ knew how. Not that her mother was much of help when she was alive. Her mother was pretty useless too. And maybe that’s why Natalie doesn’t really feel much difference emotionally now that her mother has gone. The only thing that bothers her is that she needs to cook and clean herself from now on.
0
May 13, 2017
May 13, 2017 at 10:30 AM UTC
Mother
She looked at her mother. Her mother’s dead body to be more specific. She wanted to cry and scream. But all she could do was stare at what is in the coffin. A body. It belonged to someone she once knew. Her mother. People were rushing past her. It is a funeral after all. Too many things to be done. And no one really could ask her to do anything. She was stiff as a stone. Pretty useless anyway. Always have been. Never knew what the right things to do socially were. That used to be one of the problems her mother had with her. Her poor mother. She gave birth to an alien. Someone who wasn’t normal. She looked human outside but inside her daughter could not be more different to her. Not only to her but pretty much an alien to the whole planet. She didn’t know how to behave or dress up in social events. How much her mother wanted a daughter who was pretty so she can flaunt her daughter everywhere? How much she wanted a daughter who did not always argue with her? How much she wanted a daughter who loved house chores and enjoyed shopping? How much she wanted a child who was just like everyone else? There were countless days her mother scolded the God. All her mother ever wanted was a normal child. She didn’t have the strength to handle this abnormal child who is nothing but a burden. Fortunately, her mother does not have to worry about that anymore. She has left this ‘burden’ to fend for herself now. If only ‘this burden’ knew how. Not that her mother was much of help when she was alive. Her mother was pretty useless too. And maybe that’s why Natalie doesn’t really feel much difference emotionally now that her mother has gone. The only thing that bothers her is that she needs to cook and clean herself from now on.
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34
When I look out from the smudged and cracked windows of home, I know there's no place quite the same as right here; No place I could find that quite catches my ear, And no place quite the same that can swallow my fears, To the depths of this heated and comfortable box, In which I am protected by numerous locks, From intruders and bandits, Salesmen and clerks; I am the legal intruder, And for me, that's what works. Yet I'm here when, in fact, I am meant to be there; Not far from my home, I'm meant to be learning whats fair. I am meant to be learning what's right and what's wrong, Yet 6 hours of my time a day seems quite long, To be spending on verbs, nouns and pronouns, On algebra, fractions, and abnormal word sounds. This life is not theirs; this life is all mine, Such an old and used system would appear to be right, Yet I beg to differ, as revolution now squeaks, To push through the systems cracks and cause leaks, In which free-thinking filters the words of the old, Who believe themselves better, for they're trained and so bold. When I look to society, what is it I see? Is it a throng of a thousand people who seem to be free? Not quite, yet at the same time, that seems quite close, They are free in a box, in which authority is the host. *"Civilization has to be defended against the individual, And its regulations, institutions and commands are directed to that task."** Quite an obvious command, And it seems that at last, Man is learning to embrace what they each see as free; And it does not simply stop at being free to simply be, It goes beyond such in mind, matter, soul, and in trust; For it is the systems denial, Towards which I lust. The institutions, and nations, Corporations, news stations, Stateism, classism, all attempt to control, Who I am, what I do, where I go, who I meet; They tell me to relax, and just take a quick seat; Yet I know what I want from life is free feet, To be who I am, And take all the heat. To do what I do, And ignore what's 'elite.' To go where I go, And control, as such, my feet. To meet who I meet, And next to them, take a seat. I am not a name, And I am not a number. I am always awake in my mind, As I slumber.
0
Oct 18, 2010
Oct 18, 2010 at 10:58 AM UTC
Fractal Ambivalence
When I look out from the smudged and cracked windows of home, I know there's no place quite the same as right here; No place I could find that quite catches my ear, And no place quite the same that can swallow my fears, To the depths of this heated and comfortable box, In which I am protected by numerous locks, From intruders and bandits, Salesmen and clerks; I am the legal intruder, And for me, that's what works. Yet I'm here when, in fact, I am meant to be there; Not far from my home, I'm meant to be learning whats fair. I am meant to be learning what's right and what's wrong, Yet 6 hours of my time a day seems quite long, To be spending on verbs, nouns and pronouns, On algebra, fractions, and abnormal word sounds. This life is not theirs; this life is all mine, Such an old and used system would appear to be right, Yet I beg to differ, as revolution now squeaks, To push through the systems cracks and cause leaks, In which free-thinking filters the words of the old, Who believe themselves better, for they're trained and so bold. When I look to society, what is it I see? Is it a throng of a thousand people who seem to be free? Not quite, yet at the same time, that seems quite close, They are free in a box, in which authority is the host. *"Civilization has to be defended against the individual, And its regulations, institutions and commands are directed to that task."** Quite an obvious command, And it seems that at last, Man is learning to embrace what they each see as free; And it does not simply stop at being free to simply be, It goes beyond such in mind, matter, soul, and in trust; For it is the systems denial, Towards which I lust. The institutions, and nations, Corporations, news stations, Stateism, classism, all attempt to control, Who I am, what I do, where I go, who I meet; They tell me to relax, and just take a quick seat; Yet I know what I want from life is free feet, To be who I am, And take all the heat. To do what I do, And ignore what's 'elite.' To go where I go, And control, as such, my feet. To meet who I meet, And next to them, take a seat. I am not a name, And I am not a number. I am always awake in my mind, As I slumber.
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