"As my neck suffered another"
andy fardell 

This misty grey day
Looked back at me
and smiled at the sight
See my reddened brown eyes

Joy in my head
As my neck suffered another
crashed out night
On my pillow made of lead

Toss to the turn as the sleep monster says
"no sleep for you boy awaken the dead"
Awaken the dead ? I thought
As my head lolled around
Thoughts of another night
Lost to no sound

Aches to my bones as I shudder the sleep
Fall at my side
Fall as a heap
Sleep please forgive me as I bid you farewell
Another day started
My living
My hell

"I know how much you’ve suffered,"
Edwin F Lopez 

You’ve broken into my heart.
What are you doing in there?
You should have knocked first,
But wait a second, you don’t look so well.

Every time you enter my heart,
I feel every beat drop.
I sense what makes you better,
Every time I’ve let you into my heart.

Even through dark times,
I’ll be here for you.
Don’t stop believing in me,
So I don’t disappear like a dream

Regardless of what may be,
I will always protect you.
Even through your darkest dream,
I will stay by your side.

Now I have to apologize,
Coz I must part from you.
I will return by your side,
Just give me some time…

Now I must say goodbye.
Let us remember our days,
So in case I can’t come back,
You have something to hold on to.

I know how much you’ve suffered,
And I don’t want to make it worse.
I hope you pray for me,
But it can’t be guaranteed.

I will do everything over my power,
Just to stay safe and unharmed.
Don’t forget me and all the ecstasy with you,
Coz those things are my guides towards you.

Avarious Ignis Ragnarok 09/16/04
"The girl who suffered the fall"
Always Ally 

I was alone
Young in age
Filled with sadness
Filled with rage

Tried to speak out
But no one heard
Not a whisper
Not one single word

Got used to depression
A familiar friend
There always
Until the end

I didn't need anything, anyone
I did everything on my own
I got used to the cold
I got used to being alone

The girl with no future
The girl with no path
The girl angry with the world
Full of wrath

They starred and they whispered
But I didn't care
I'd cut my skin
I'd cut my hair

The girl who had nothing at all
The girl who suffered the fall

"i suffered from"

i suffered from
a disease called

it started when my
mother left
because she wasn't in love

and i was the only
one around
to feel his rage.

a few months later
that was when
i was done

i told the guidance counselor
that i was ready
and she asked me if i was sure

"without a doubt
if i am not stopped
you won't see me tomorrow"

and she called him
explaining the dangers and
sent me home.

the only thing
he was worried about
was how people saw him

what people were
going to think
when they heard the news.

how could he have
a dysfunctional daughter
when he is so perfect?

i was sent to counseling
and like i expected
it didn't help.

she was kind
but with her religion
she tried to show me new light

and don't get me wrong
there's nothing bad about it
but it's just not my style

and with her christianity
i could never fully
express how i felt.

while i didn't mind
wasting his money
i ended it early

"yes of course i'm better
no longer do i wish
to slit my wrists".

the next month
i did just that

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