Once upon a time there was baby trees
and one came to me
and said hes pleased
he shook my hand
and i took his leaf
I hid it and told him i gave it to Kieth
Kieth said "i have not such"
now the tree didn't believe me too much
so i told him "man you need to lighten up,
and take a drink right out of this cup."
he did just that then asked the pup
"have you seen my hand?"
dog said "thats not all you lost man."
so the tree thought "why do i give a ****?
I'm going back to Amsterdam"
so i went with the tree and we went back
sat on his porch and smoked a fat sack
then we went down to a local crab shack
but as i was eating one tried to attack
so we left and wondered on down
the block where we were and i couldn't frown
because that tree right now is one hell of a clown
because he brought up the fact thats hes a talking baby tree
and as i began to see
it became funny to me
so funny i laughed until i needed to ***
i stopped and asked someone where the facilities were
they said "don't ask me, ask the tree sir"
so i busted up for a second time
then thought if hes real then to laugh wouldn't be kind
but three just stood there not seeming to mind
so i thought "maybe i should start on home"
i told the tree i was leaving tonight on a plane alone
he said "wait! no don't leave me be!
i mean look at me i'm a talking baby tree!"
so i thought not to hard and not too long
and then said "sure whats the worst that could go wrong?"
little did i know that he was strapped with a bomb
i told him not to use it and he said real calm,
"I'll do what i want you're not my mom."
i thought oh man its that kind of kid
who doesn't give a **** about what he does or did
and if hes that kind of child
his parents probably let him run rampid and wild
then i snapped out of it and said "what am i doing?
its a ******* talking baby tree!"
and since it doesn't have hands it only has leaves
i took it away the bomb that thing
but then i was accused of all the threating
so when i got home i thought **** it,
that ******* baby tree was raised in a bucket
so i found a place where i could then chuck it
it hit the water and made a big splash
i threw it in the lake where people skatter ash
then i went back to Amsterdam to steal that tree's stash
i smoked it all and then took all his cash
so happily ever after i live in peace
without that baby tree since now its deceased
unless it could swim then that would be beast.