Valerie May 2
like a change of the seasons,
the faces in your life disappear,
and new one materializes-
some sunrays of the summer
linger to the autumn,
but by winter, they've faded
to a mere memory of
what it used to be
Valerie Mar 21
She's the good girl

in front of her parents.

She's the popular cheerleader

in front of her school.

She's someone to take for granted

in front of her boyfriend.

She's someone who tries so hard

in front of her test papers

She's someone you ***** about

in front of all your best friends.

She's someone you kissed for just one night

because she feels lonely.

She's someone whose body was lowered into the ground this morning,

because nobody ever knew.

She's the girl with a thousand faces,

in front of everybody.
Valerie Feb 22
i can’t remember a time before i wasn’t caught
in the pearly whites of your canines, or an era
when i wasn’t perforated apart by your cannonballs,
shot down by the bullets of the glistening emeralds
you call your eyes.

i can’t remember a time when my poems
wasn't dedicated to memorising every detail
of your raven eyelashes curving to the sky,
or how the warmth of your palms transcend
the coldness i tolerated in my heart.

i can’t remember a time when i didn’t
have something to lose, and i think that started
when your honey-lidded gaze fall on me in the
middle of a crowded room with too much sound,
but i can still hear the ‘i love you’.

i can’t remember a time when you used to be static
-pure background noise, irrelevant, unnoticed
after all, doesn’t it drive you crazy how much
someone could mean to you?
at first, they’re a whisper in the dark and suddenly-

Valerie Jul 1
from when the sun rises
to the moon's transcendence,
it's always going to be you.
Valerie Apr 15
in a world full of colour,
i am a blank canvas.
Valerie Mar 26
i'm here for your body,
not you,
and you're here for my lips,
not me,
there's no dishonesty in
this sanctuary,
there is only breath and release,
kisses and heartbroken dreams.

i'll pretend to care about you
for the night,
and you'll pretend to hold me,
to ride the tide;
there's no genuine emotions in
this space,
there is only give and push,
pull and take.

i know everything from the soft spot
on your neck,
to how you lose your mind over
every arch of my back
but nothing about your favourite colour,
or if you've ever been hurt.

(but i'm good with not knowing).
a poem about a fuckbuddy, really?
Valerie Sep 13
chaotic night drives,
green eyes in the blue dark-
tender fingers and softer hair-
coffee in the afternoon,
cigarette breath hover over your lips-
old black t-shirts tucked under denim-

lazy summer day grins-
slippery hands reminded me of times
when the sun came out of your voice.
chasing after endless horizons
on roads with houses that
never change,

i didn't ask for you,
but i somehow needed you.
it's been way overdue but hey here's a short poem on an update of how i've been feeling.
Valerie Apr 24
we float endlessly
on this cloud
we call existence-
paddling across a
stream of events-
milestones of fabricated
importance and meaning-
we're in an
empty space of
shapes and forms-
we're idyllic wanderers,
drawers of such
a wild dream
coffee and 3am inspiration, my people.
Valerie Feb 27
****** pulses,
heartbreak tears,
whiskey kiss,
sugarcoated insecurities,
drowning those emotions
(doesn't think she has a problem)
***** penchants
for ******* habits,
disco fever
oh, never sober
sunrise-wide eyes,
adderall nights
i don't know about you
but i think you got some daddy issues
****, story of my life.
Valerie Apr 26
there is nothing more devastating
than the slow burn of a flame
that used to go off like a firework.

we're not a trainwreck waiting to happen,
or an explosion at the end of a tunnel-
we're more of a light losing it's spark.

and somehow, i feel that's sadder almost-
it didn't happen so abruptly that it felt
like i'm ripping off a bandaid

we're movie that started out beautiful,
but as the end looms closer, you can sense
the ending stained with tear-tracks on cheeks.

after all, i prefer you screaming and shouting
like a thunderstorm fighting through,
than to be a breeze passing me by and letting me go.
Valerie Sep 25
i taste pieces of my heart on your teeth,
and i think of you in every soul i kiss-
your quagmire eyes and cinnamon skin.

you and your cutthroat cheekbones,
the way your jaw clenched when you spoke-
how i could feel my pulse in my throat.

you exists entirely like a mystery-
a story i can never stop reading,
but uncertain about the ending.

you’re the kind of explosive love
that i fell far too deep in
(and spoiler alert),
i didn't survive the landing.
Valerie Feb 14
i'm writing this at two in the morning,

barely functioning on heartbreak and whiskey,

at a party my friends made me go to,

i see you with that t-shirt from two nights ago

you're avoiding my gaze like it's make out of laser,

ready to burn and sear you into pieces.

i remember your kiss like glass shards,

from nights of being drunk in crowded clubs;

but i don't mean much to you

because we're generation l o v e l e s s

i think i'm actually incapable of genuine emotions,

because i'm a cynic who refuses to let people in,

my mother thinks i'm awfully indifferent,

she's right so i pretend to seem interested;

and work on fruitless endeavours to give a ****,

while drowning myself in sirens of trap music and rap rhythms,

swaying my body with people i call my best friends,

and writing tales of golden boys and gilded girls,

twirling in sunshine, holding hands and falling in love

but what do i know?

after all, i'm part of generation l o v e l e s s.

you erode my coats of armour and walls of steel

like rust and water and metal,

and even after i told myself, ten thousand stories later,

this isn't going to go well, and believe me, it didn't,

i'm here paralysed in a paroxysmic moment of words,

hurtling at me like rapid machine bullets,

bemoaning about a soul that will never

consider me as an equal,

and you have me here, lying on alabaster sheets,

as sleep obnoxiously eludes me,

turning you in the currents of my mind, going one two three

like the beat of a love song playing behind our lips

(maybe i'm not as loveless as i thought as i was)
autobiographical content right there.
Valerie 4d
i just want to see you happy,
even if it doesn't
include me.
Valerie Feb 15
we're just two people,
trying to teach each other
how to hate ourselves less.
Valerie May 4
i broke my own heart
before you even could.
Valerie Feb 13
her pin-up figure drifts from body to body,
eyes red-rimmed from *** and ketamine;
you can taste the hurricane when you kiss her,
and know from the very start, this is your destruction.

everybody loves her- or rather, the idea of her,
infatuated with the caricature of her depression,
her cherry-pink mouth and bottle blonde demons;
those bambi eyes streaming tears down her apple cheeks

you think you're the knight in shining armour-
**** no, you're merely a victim of her wildfire,
a statement made to anyone who dare enters her hearth;
she's a heartbreaker, made out of vices and poison.
inspired by effy??? from skins??
Valerie Jan 28
i bleed over your fingers,
drip menace onto your lips,
and steal breath from your ribs

i'm a goddess, don't deny me-
sacrifice your saints at my feet,
after all, i'm violence in your peace

find heaven in between my curves,
search for *** in the hollows of my love,
bathe in the sin of the two of us

(against the world)
short, sweet, and kind of garbage.
Valerie Apr 29
i was trying to find a home in you,
but i realize the only way i ever will
is to build my own.
Valerie Feb 5
your shadow lingers
from time to time
you're especially apparent
in the twilight
when the sun is burnt
and the horizon blushes,
i think of your feather-soft hands,
how your promises once sounded
and all that blue in your closet.

by the morning
you've taken your things,
and disappeared into the ashes
without a trace,
i think of how we used to love,
like little children running down streets,
lacing our shoes and kissing our bruises,
and now we're too old for our bodies,
our souls are too weathered and battered
for such a thing.
kinda garbage but i did this under five mins so please forgive
Valerie Mar 25
there are many stories of how humankind
came to be,
and i'm not exactly sure how many of them
i like to believe.
are we here pre-destined for a great adventure
or rather yet, we're just here because we're here

i don't really like the ones that tells us about fate,
how we're meant to love somebody and all that-
i don't think anybody is born to love anybody
except themselves,
and even then sometimes i struggle with that too.

i don't think we're souls carved out on the plane of time
and i don't think we're beacons that were planned to collide,
i don't think we're a star-crossed fairytale on a dusty page,
and i don't think the air was waiting for silhouettes to fill the empty space.

i don't think i look to the future searching for your face,
and i don't think you shout across the void for my name,
i don't think we're planets intended to orbit around each other
and i don't think we're the seams of this quilted universe
that stitched itself just for us.

i just think we're us,
and that is all we have to be.
coffee and no sleep is great for inspiration
Valerie Jun 2
in the grand schemes of things,
we're just specks in a fraction
of a fraction of a second-
and while in the future,
we may cease to exist-
it is in the present
that we are immortal.
it's been a while, guys.
Valerie Apr 26
insecurity is like an ocean.

you are either paddling, waddling,

endeavoring to stay alive,

and the currents of society will come at you,

one at a time, almost like rapid fire bullets.

or you can choose to drown in it,

and let the water take you as their own,

allow their vicious streams to pour into your mind,

and infiltrate you with their poison of never being good enough.

it's either you submit to what they want

or endure, fight and keep swimming,

hoping for the shore,

that will never arrive.
Valerie Jan 31
whose name made you drink enough to forget your own?

why are you slurring, stumbling, shivering, shaking,

your mouth a spillage of magenta and fuschia,

hands slung over your best friends as they steady you into a car,

a cab they've called in a flurry of messy text messages and laughs,

joking about how drunk they've gotten to make sure his name

never perforate itself in your mind again.

you thought the two (or eight) shots you down,

in flimsy, rough, swallows of gasoline and heartbreak

will bury him in a box underneath the dirt floor of your mind

but his nomenclature refuse to transform from 'love' to 'stranger'.

he stays, he stays, he stays

unlike his form, his body, his soul,

and in the vagaries of life,

we lose and we lost,

because a girl's love changes,

like the seasons,

and we can heal,

we can break,

but we'll be okay,

once again.
Valerie Oct 5
Love smells like his denim jacket, all warm and tinged with his cologne and his musk. Love smells like toasted pancakes on a drowsy Sunday. Love smells like burned wood in the fireplace on a cold winter day.

Love tastes like licking the ice cream dripping down your fingers. Love tastes like the spurt of gooey chocolate on the first bite, all sweet, dark and delicious. Love tastes like hot coffee on a monday morning, bright and awakening, getting you ready for the first day.

Love feels like his hand squeezing yours when you’re unaware. Love feels like his mouth fitting perfectly in yours. Love feels like the surprise of seeing him waiting up for you when you come home late.

Love sounds like his slow beating pulse when your head is on his chest at three a.m. Love sounds like him murmuring ‘i love yous’ when he thinks you’re asleep. Love sounds like the buzz of the T.V on low when you both accidentally fell asleep talking.

Love looks when the morning light is flooding into your room and the first thing you see is the light bathing his face in this godly mustard glow. Love looks like skin. Skin up close. Where you can see every freckle, pore, every imperfection and every flaw. And ****, does it takes your breath away.
an old but gold poem of mine.
Valerie Sep 16
you’re my favourite mistake to make.
Valerie Jan 24
my body is a temple,

not a battleground

for other women to fight in.

my body is a temple,

not a pit stop for other men,

that needs a place to rest in for the night.

my body is a temple,

not a critical text you can analyse,

and assume judgement like a book you never read.

my body is a temple,

not a pack of wild animals,

aimed to be restrained and taught what to do.

my body is a temple,

and it tells a story that no one

except for me will ever understand.

my body is a temple,

and it will not be disrespected.

like a religion, i'll learn to worship it.
Valerie Jun 3
the devil has a name
and it was yours.
Valerie Sep 29
loving you was a dream that quickly turned into a nightmare.
Valerie Jan 31
stick and stones may break my bones
but words will carve into my soul
and mar upon the walls of my heart

so i turn the poison you spit at me
into knives i cut myself and others with,
until i realize i hold a special power

i hold a power to neutralize your acid
and transform your vitriol into water-
a spilling fountain of kindness and forgiveness.
the hate you get doesn't have to be the hate you give.
Valerie Jan 25
velvet stains on the crevice of your lips,
and you taste like water, not whisky.
your lucid sky-coloured gaze chase to meet me,
and even in the dark, they're evergreen.

they say that we're made of blue blood,
but all i taste is red, red, red- metallic, like rust,
i can feel my heart pulsing underneath my wrecked lungs,
because here am i, soaked in your stardust.

the room is struck with electricity when you arrive,
ochre colours my cheeks and heat in my skin rise,
like the silver waves, you sweep me in with the tide,
and once again, i'm yours, lovely, you have me stupefied.

when i'm around you, my heart pumps crimson,
and i wear your breath on my neck like a chain of diamonds,
and you look at me, glory behold like i'm your redemption,
like i'm an ultraviolet, phosphorescent burst of magnetism.

(i want you to look at me like that forever).
lowercase intended.
Valerie Jun 25
i remember the past
of how i once thought
your future was me.
Valerie Jan 31
did you had to pluck my flowers
just so yours could grow?
short but powerful
Valerie Jun 19
once upon a time,
you painted my skies
and built my world.
you crafted a reality
of freckles spangled like
stars up your cheekbones
and the lights you lit in
my dark, hollow eyes.

once upon a time,
we were a collection
of chapped lips and bad breath,
lying on our backs on
country roads and suburban fields.
our bones were weary but still alive
with that frantic flame of

but once upon a time was then-
and we live in the now, which
is a journey I'm still going through.
and the thing about constructed realities
is they tend to fall apart (eventually)
and the thing about fires is that
they go out.

[nothing lasts forever].
it's been a while!
Valerie Feb 5
teach young girls how to love themselves
so they'll trust a man who would do the same.
Valerie Feb 9
from the moment you coat me in your stardust
i know i'm doomed for my heart to be torn into two,
i'm ready for a pulsating, whirlwind romance,
of two souls ricocheting from every dark corner.

i know my heart will shatter across the linoleum floor,
shards of red and glass tumbling from my open heart cavity,
dripping blood, desire and dignity, because everybody knows
the story of the harlequin girl and her daredevil charmer.
Valerie Mar 6
you awaken galaxies in me
within the first conversation,
and we're fluorescent in this
cold grey world we're born in

coffee on the roof of your mouth,
your eyes wide and kaleidoscopic,
my dress is suffocating me by my waist,
and yet i'm still dancing to every beat with you

but then we fell apart in your usual way-
we didn't crash or burn, we just ran out
but i still see your face in every single crowd
because you're forever stitched on my sleeves

we didn't go down in a spectacular explosion,
it was more of a worn out melody tuning down,
and it's funny how i think about the past now
because back then i used to think my future was you.
just some thoughts
Valerie Feb 2
we are a generation of sedation,

discursive, empty, godless children,

raised in the age of social media,

where the height of our emotions

lie in our 'thoughts and prayers',

and the best we can do is a touch of a button,

a share, a like, a tweet, a reaction documented,

rumination we pretend we've borne.

is it our intrepid numbness to it all?

after all, we are best known for

the plight for attention and validation,

or rather yet our entitlement and our narcissism,

terrorism doesn't have a face unless i see it,

and it begs the millennial question,

are we just a bunched of depressed sociopaths?

or is it because we are the privileged 20%,

nestle in the fringes of developed nations,

with our precious technology and our internet,

unbeknownst to a third world, a third world

we mourn according to how it benefits us.

after all, don't forget that in an emergency,

there is always 'thoughts and prayers'.

Valerie Apr 20
the heat of your mouth
tastes like a thunderstorm
brewing from a distance away-
i'm so good at being careful but
i find myself getting caught in the storm
again and again and again.
Valerie Feb 15
pick me apart,
tear me down,
***** me up,
skin and bones,
nothing else left-
you're a phantom
to me now,
and i'm haunted,
i have questions
did it mean
anything to you?
am i different?
just like others?
do i sweep
breath out from
your nicotine lungs?
do i make
you shake, quiver,
tremble before me?
am i forgettable-
a mistake or,
just another mark
on the scoreboard?
are we a
mere whimper in
the never-ending darkness,
or a sparkling
fizzle of a
firework, raining blue,
red and white?
all i want to
ask you is
was i like
the other girls
or am i
more to you?
three word poem challenge? idk
Valerie Oct 13
lost count of days i've wasted
trying to come up with ways
to make you miss me.
Valerie Jan 22
we are all afraid.

when we hide under the static lights of our intergalactic worlds,

behind the screens of our digital age,

it is all because we cannot take risks,

risks of rejection, being unloved, tossed aside

and forgotten like a page dog-eared and bookmarked with a faded polaroid taken

with shaky hands in a half unread book.

we are all afraid.

it is better to say nothing at all,

and let it hang stagnant between two

sad souls, rather than take a leap

and hope- because hope is ******.

it is a flimsy plastic emotion, on the verge of breaking because

that's what people are- fragile and weak.

we are all afraid.

from a five-year-old refusing to learn

how to ride a bike to an eighteen-year-old

runaway, who looks at a crumpled map,

lost with a chip in her shoulder

and we fear the unknown but we disguise it

under tacky bright yellow stickers

with fake happy slogans that make no sense.

we are all afraid.

we wipe the tears off our cheeks and

prays silently that nobody sees,

because then they'll ask if we're

okay and when we really want to say we're not,

we swallow the truth and plaster a smile.

we are all afraid.

and it's the most human feeling-

the sharp sting of fear and it's telling us maybe,

just maybe

its because we are scared

that maybe nobody really loves us

at all.
the human condition, yo.
Valerie Feb 7
we are young gods,

daughters and sons of a generation

who gave up on love a universe ago,

but we do our best to experience it-

we sell it in bottles of pop culture and rabid obsessions;

turn it into a conglomeration that profiteers on excess,

a chaos of depression, anxiety, dark self-depreciating wit-

and become artists who lament on first-world tragedies.

we are young gods,

we scoff at religion and we bathe in unholiness,

sin is the new in, black is your best act, and we love it;

we wear our indifference like an armour,

because we fear what we'll see if we're allowed

to understand our emotions and display our vulnerability.

we are young gods,

happy ever after is a joke and true love even more so,

we inhale criticism and exhale cynicism,

because the titans before us acknowledge that the world is cruel

but we embrace it- we drape ourselves in abject and misery,

stitch and mould uncaring faces onto our flesh that gaze upon

the heartbroken jagged shards of ourselves, bleeding guts and glory

embedded all over the cement patch wood floors, amongst the whisky and wine.

we are the young gods;

a mass of degenerates with our entitlement and liberals,

a numbing, sweet hollow feeling that we substitute

for the lack of love and care that we've grown used to;

a realism that carves like a knife at tender ages and

we wear our sadness like a charm- aesthetics to be envied;

we're self-destructive, faithless, pointless,

burning in our question for the meaning of existence

and the only religion we'll ever bow down to

is ourselves.
oh well?
Valerie Jul 26
i am:
three a.m tears,
the way thunder claps,
neon lights in crowded clubs,
sharp tequila and acidic limes.
clasps hands and sweaty palms,
tongue kisses from strangers,
clouds hovering a crescent moon.
i am the best you never had,
thorns from roses,
slow R&B from the 90s.
i am here,
and i refuse to not exist.
just some prose for ya filthy animals <3 <3 <3
Valerie Feb 19
you're a haze of ninety-nine cents dreams,
naivety bottled in your distressed jeans
and your ******-inspired bambi teardrop eyes;
and i'm the devil behind why you've cried

your mouth chokes with fury and rage
'so why are you still here?' i ask again
but secretly, i know you and your obsession
-the glory tales of getting heartbroken

you know i'm pure poison flowing in your veins,
a disaster functioning on self-hatred and novacane,
but you're wild violet and champagne in a sweet kiss,
desperate to be inundated into my abyss.
idk what is this
Valerie Mar 12
with you-
there's always a taste of danger in the sky
and our skins will be set ablaze, sunset-flushed,
under the horizon of peach-coloured clouds,
the wind in my hair, sun in your eyes
and the world right underneath us.

with you-
i feel like a sinner and a saint all at once,
we're flashes of vibrant pomegranate and fireflies
exploding with a firecracker passion romance books envy,
you can baptise me with your thighs,
and i'll worship you almost every night.

with you-
i transform, no longer the cautious observer,
treading around the eggshells of my emotions,
too scared to venture into the hurricane they call your name,
and i'm the willing sacrifice,
ready to spill across the altar.

without you-
i'm a collapse of a soul, a collection of
salted wounds, burning cheeks and stammering hearts,
and i'm perpetually craving what was once mine,
the heated embraces, the chaotic romances of
fire and brimstone.

without you, i'm simply nothing.
Valerie Feb 6
women are not beautiful.
they are magnetic, majestic, magnificent,
they are more than doll bodies and ****** eyes,
they are more than what they were born with.

women are not beautiful.
they are effervescent, enigmatic and evergreen,
they are more than paper-thin waistlines and cherry lips,
they are more than what the eyes can look upon.

women are not beautiful.
they are powerful, passionate, and puissant,
they are more than barbie figures and pink hemlines,
they are not beautiful simply because they are more than that.
feminist as ****.
Valerie Mar 18
i'm your black slash of paint
in the middle of your blank canvas
you're a sultry indian summer
in the midst of my siberian nights

you're a firework quietly going off
inside the isolation in my head,
and i'm your hearth, your home
in a crowd choked with strangers

my fingers dance across the ballroom
of your freckles and craters of skin,
and i'm perforating every curve of you,
from your liquid chocolate eyes to your lips.

i calculate every manoeuvre made,
but no one ever counted on you-
and you crash in, guns glazing,
and i was never the same.

— The End —