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Valerie May 2018
like a change of the seasons,
the faces in your life disappear,
and new one materializes-
some sunrays of the summer
linger to the autumn,
but by winter, they've faded
to a mere memory of
what it used to be
Valerie Mar 2018
She's the good girl

in front of her parents.

She's the popular cheerleader

in front of her school.

She's someone to take for granted

in front of her boyfriend.

She's someone who tries so hard

in front of her test papers

She's someone you ***** about

in front of all your best friends.

She's someone you kissed for just one night

because she feels lonely.

She's someone whose body was lowered into the ground this morning,

because nobody ever knew.

She's the girl with a thousand faces,

in front of everybody.
Valerie Feb 2018
i can’t remember a time before i wasn’t caught
in the pearly whites of your canines, or an era
when i wasn’t perforated apart by your cannonballs,
shot down by the bullets of the glistening emeralds
you call your eyes.

i can’t remember a time when my poems
wasn't dedicated to memorising every detail
of your raven eyelashes curving to the sky,
or how the warmth of your palms transcend
the coldness i tolerated in my heart.

i can’t remember a time when i didn’t
have something to lose, and i think that started
when your honey-lidded gaze fall on me in the
middle of a crowded room with too much sound,
but i can still hear the ‘i love you’.

i can’t remember a time when you used to be static
-pure background noise, irrelevant, unnoticed
after all, doesn’t it drive you crazy how much
someone could mean to you?
at first, they’re a whisper in the dark and suddenly-

Valerie Jul 2018
from when the sun rises
to the moon's transcendence,
it's always going to be you.
Valerie Apr 2018
in a world full of colour,
i am a blank canvas.
Valerie Mar 2018
i'm here for your body,
not you,
and you're here for my lips,
not me,
there's no dishonesty in
this sanctuary,
there is only breath and release,
kisses and heartbroken dreams.

i'll pretend to care about you
for the night,
and you'll pretend to hold me,
to ride the tide;
there's no genuine emotions in
this space,
there is only give and push,
pull and take.

i know everything from the soft spot
on your neck,
to how you lose your mind over
every arch of my back
but nothing about your favourite colour,
or if you've ever been hurt.

(but i'm good with not knowing).
a poem about a fuckbuddy, really?
Valerie Sep 2018
chaotic night drives,
green eyes in the blue dark-
tender fingers and softer hair-
coffee in the afternoon,
cigarette breath hover over your lips-
old black t-shirts tucked under denim-

lazy summer day grins-
slippery hands reminded me of times
when the sun came out of your voice.
chasing after endless horizons
on roads with houses that
never change,

i didn't ask for you,
but i somehow needed you.
it's been way overdue but hey here's a short poem on an update of how i've been feeling.
Valerie Jan 13
no one should ever need
to "complete" anyone;
you're already whole
on your own-
it's just sometimes
we need somebody
to shine the light
on the pieces we
thought were missing.
Valerie Apr 2018
we float endlessly
on this cloud
we call existence-
paddling across a
stream of events-
milestones of fabricated
importance and meaning-
we're in an
empty space of
shapes and forms-
we're idyllic wanderers,
drawers of such
a wild dream
coffee and 3am inspiration, my people.
Valerie Feb 2018
****** pulses,
heartbreak tears,
whiskey kiss,
sugarcoated insecurities,
drowning those emotions
(doesn't think she has a problem)
***** penchants
for ******* habits,
disco fever
oh, never sober
sunrise-wide eyes,
adderall nights
i don't know about you
but i think you got some daddy issues
****, story of my life.
Valerie Aug 14
i drowned myself in you so much
that i don't recognize myself in
the reflection of your lake anymore.
it was always about you.
Valerie Apr 2018
there is nothing more devastating
than the slow burn of a flame
that used to go off like a firework.

we're not a trainwreck waiting to happen,
or an explosion at the end of a tunnel-
we're more of a light losing it's spark.

and somehow, i feel that's sadder almost-
it didn't happen so abruptly that it felt
like i'm ripping off a bandaid

we're movie that started out beautiful,
but as the end looms closer, you can sense
the ending stained with tear-tracks on cheeks.

after all, i prefer you screaming and shouting
like a thunderstorm fighting through,
than to be a breeze passing me by and letting me go.
Valerie Sep 2018
i taste pieces of my heart on your teeth,
and i think of you in every soul i kiss-
your quagmire eyes and cinnamon skin.

you and your cutthroat cheekbones,
the way your jaw clenched when you spoke-
how i could feel my pulse in my throat.

you exists entirely like a mystery-
a story i can never stop reading,
but uncertain about the ending.

you’re the kind of explosive love
that i fell far too deep in
(and spoiler alert),
i didn't survive the landing.
Valerie Feb 2018
i'm writing this at two in the morning,

barely functioning on heartbreak and whiskey,

at a party my friends made me go to,

i see you with that t-shirt from two nights ago

you're avoiding my gaze like it's make out of laser,

ready to burn and sear you into pieces.

i remember your kiss like glass shards,

from nights of being drunk in crowded clubs;

but i don't mean much to you

because we're generation l o v e l e s s

i think i'm actually incapable of genuine emotions,

because i'm a cynic who refuses to let people in,

my mother thinks i'm awfully indifferent,

she's right so i pretend to seem interested;

and work on fruitless endeavours to give a ****,

while drowning myself in sirens of trap music and rap rhythms,

swaying my body with people i call my best friends,

and writing tales of golden boys and gilded girls,

twirling in sunshine, holding hands and falling in love

but what do i know?

after all, i'm part of generation l o v e l e s s.

you erode my coats of armour and walls of steel

like rust and water and metal,

and even after i told myself, ten thousand stories later,

this isn't going to go well, and believe me, it didn't,

i'm here paralysed in a paroxysmic moment of words,

hurtling at me like rapid machine bullets,

bemoaning about a soul that will never

consider me as an equal,

and you have me here, lying on alabaster sheets,

as sleep obnoxiously eludes me,

turning you in the currents of my mind, going one two three

like the beat of a love song playing behind our lips

(maybe i'm not as loveless as i thought as i was)
autobiographical content right there.
Valerie Oct 2018
i just want to see you happy,
even if it doesn't
include me.
Valerie Feb 2018
we're just two people,
trying to teach each other
how to hate ourselves less.
Valerie May 2018
i broke my own heart
before you even could.
Valerie Feb 2018
her pin-up figure drifts from body to body,
eyes red-rimmed from *** and ketamine;
you can taste the hurricane when you kiss her,
and know from the very start, this is your destruction.

everybody loves her- or rather, the idea of her,
infatuated with the caricature of her depression,
her cherry-pink mouth and bottle blonde demons;
those bambi eyes streaming tears down her apple cheeks

you think you're the knight in shining armour-
hell no, you're merely a victim of her wildfire,
a statement made to anyone who dare enters her hearth;
she's a heartbreaker, made out of vices and poison.
inspired by effy??? from skins??
Valerie Jan 6
"do you believe there's a heaven?"

who needs heaven
when i can hold you?
short, sweet, effective? who knows!
Valerie Jan 2018
i bleed over your fingers,
drip menace onto your lips,
and steal breath from your ribs

i'm a goddess, don't deny me-
sacrifice your saints at my feet,
after all, i'm violence in your peace

find heaven in between my curves,
search for god in the hollows of my love,
bathe in the sin of the two of us

(against the world)
short, sweet, and kind of garbage.
Valerie Mar 20
your favourite hello
and your hardest goodbye.
Valerie Apr 2018
i was trying to find a home in you,
but i realize the only way i ever will
is to build my own.
Valerie Feb 2018
your shadow lingers
from time to time
you're especially apparent
in the twilight
when the sun is burnt
and the horizon blushes,
i think of your feather-soft hands,
how your promises once sounded
and all that blue in your closet.

by the morning
you've taken your things,
and disappeared into the ashes
without a trace,
i think of how we used to love,
like little children running down streets,
lacing our shoes and kissing our bruises,
and now we're too old for our bodies,
our souls are too weathered and battered
for such a thing.
kinda garbage but i did this under five mins so please forgive
Valerie Mar 2018
there are many stories of how humankind
came to be,
and i'm not exactly sure how many of them
i like to believe.
are we here pre-destined for a great adventure
or rather yet, we're just here because we're here

i don't really like the ones that tells us about fate,
how we're meant to love somebody and all that-
i don't think anybody is born to love anybody
except themselves,
and even then sometimes i struggle with that too.

i don't think we're souls carved out on the plane of time
and i don't think we're beacons that were planned to collide,
i don't think we're a star-crossed fairytale on a dusty page,
and i don't think the air was waiting for silhouettes to fill the empty space.

i don't think i look to the future searching for your face,
and i don't think you shout across the void for my name,
i don't think we're planets intended to orbit around each other
and i don't think we're the seams of this quilted universe
that stitched itself just for us.

i just think we're us,
and that is all we have to be.
coffee and no sleep is great for inspiration
Valerie Dec 2018
i keep trying to break up
with poetry
but he keeps calling me back.

this is the first time i've picked up.
poem sort of explains it all!
Valerie Jun 2018
in the grand schemes of things,
we're just specks in a fraction
of a fraction of a second-
and while in the future,
we may cease to exist-
it is in the present
that we are immortal.
it's been a while, guys.
Valerie Apr 2018
insecurity is like an ocean.

you are either paddling, waddling,

endeavoring to stay alive,

and the currents of society will come at you,

one at a time, almost like rapid fire bullets.

or you can choose to drown in it,

and let the water take you as their own,

allow their vicious streams to pour into your mind,

and infiltrate you with their poison of never being good enough.

it's either you submit to what they want

or endure, fight and keep swimming,

hoping for the shore,

that will never arrive.
Valerie Nov 2018
some days the internet
feels like the equivalent of
walking into a room
full of people and
still feeling alone.
Valerie Jan 2018
whose name made you drink enough to forget your own?

why are you slurring, stumbling, shivering, shaking,

your mouth a spillage of magenta and fuschia,

hands slung over your best friends as they steady you into a car,

a cab they've called in a flurry of messy text messages and laughs,

joking about how drunk they've gotten to make sure his name

never perforate itself in your mind again.

you thought the two (or eight) shots you down,

in flimsy, rough, swallows of gasoline and heartbreak

will bury him in a box underneath the dirt floor of your mind

but his nomenclature refuse to transform from 'love' to 'stranger'.

he stays, he stays, he stays

unlike his form, his body, his soul,

and in the vagaries of life,

we lose and we lost,

because a girl's love changes,

like the seasons,

and we can heal,

we can break,

but we'll be okay,

once again.
Valerie Oct 2018
Love smells like his denim jacket, all warm and tinged with his cologne and his musk. Love smells like toasted pancakes on a drowsy Sunday. Love smells like burned wood in the fireplace on a cold winter day.

Love tastes like licking the ice cream dripping down your fingers. Love tastes like the spurt of gooey chocolate on the first bite, all sweet, dark and delicious. Love tastes like hot coffee on a monday morning, bright and awakening, getting you ready for the first day.

Love feels like his hand squeezing yours when you’re unaware. Love feels like his mouth fitting perfectly in yours. Love feels like the surprise of seeing him waiting up for you when you come home late.

Love sounds like his slow beating pulse when your head is on his chest at three a.m. Love sounds like him murmuring ‘i love yous’ when he thinks you’re asleep. Love sounds like the buzz of the T.V on low when you both accidentally fell asleep talking.

Love looks when the morning light is flooding into your room and the first thing you see is the light bathing his face in this godly mustard glow. Love looks like skin. Skin up close. Where you can see every freckle, pore, every imperfection and every flaw. And ****, does it takes your breath away.
an old but gold poem of mine.
Valerie Sep 2018
you’re my favourite mistake to make.
Valerie Jan 2018
my body is a temple,

not a battleground

for other women to fight in.

my body is a temple,

not a pit stop for other men,

that needs a place to rest in for the night.

my body is a temple,

not a critical text you can analyse,

and assume judgement like a book you never read.

my body is a temple,

not a pack of wild animals,

aimed to be restrained and taught what to do.

my body is a temple,

and it tells a story that no one

except for me will ever understand.

my body is a temple,

and it will not be disrespected.

like a religion, i'll learn to worship it.
Valerie Jun 2018
the devil has a name
and it was yours.
Valerie Sep 2018
loving you was a dream that quickly turned into a nightmare.
Valerie May 2
-hard feelings-
thunderous crash
of the rainstorm,
the cold floor
i land on
the way down,
scorch marks
from holding
your heart,
and then
washes over
like streams
over rocks,
a tulip
slowly unfurling,
steam rising out of
hot coffee
and suddenly,
all the feelings
are soft.
hi i'm back and sad so this poem is here. this is not really a love poem, it's actually about getting over something that's why it's "no hard feelings" because when things break up or ended badly you have all these harsh emotions of hurt, pain and regret but now there's just sort of a...softness with it. time heals everything.
Valerie Jan 2018
stick and stones may break my bones
but words will carve into my soul
and mar upon the walls of my heart

so i turn the poison you spit at me
into knives i cut myself and others with,
until i realize i hold a special power

i hold a power to neutralize your acid
and transform your vitriol into water-
a spilling fountain of kindness and forgiveness.
the hate you get doesn't have to be the hate you give.
Valerie Jan 2018
velvet stains on the crevice of your lips,
and you taste like water, not whisky.
your lucid sky-coloured gaze chase to meet me,
and even in the dark, they're evergreen.

they say that we're made of blue blood,
but all i taste is red, red, red- metallic, like rust,
i can feel my heart pulsing underneath my wrecked lungs,
because here am i, soaked in your stardust.

the room is struck with electricity when you arrive,
ochre colours my cheeks and heat in my skin rise,
like the silver waves, you sweep me in with the tide,
and once again, i'm yours, lovely, you have me stupefied.

when i'm around you, my heart pumps crimson,
and i wear your breath on my neck like a chain of diamonds,
and you look at me, glory behold like i'm your redemption,
like i'm an ultraviolet, phosphorescent burst of magnetism.

(i want you to look at me like that forever).
lowercase intended.
Valerie Jun 2018
i remember the past
of how i once thought
your future was me.
Valerie Jan 2018
did you had to pluck my flowers
just so yours could grow?
short but powerful
Valerie Feb 4
your eyes flick to me-
sapphires twinkling back
at mud brown ponds;
with a mouth like valentine
and heart pumping ichor,
you walk a rockerfeller pace.
your kiss is salt and summer beers,
mint with ice and wine coolers,
tipsy two-hour conversations over traded
war stories of nights we don't remember
leaving me walking up to my room
with grins so big they could fall off my face.
you adore leaving in the morning and
pages in your passport wearing thin,
you like cutting holes into safety nets
and being around you feels like
roaming a tranquil spring garden
planted with emotional landmines
or sitting on a train platform
with no destination in mind-
honestly, i wouldn't have it any other way
because you're my favourite waste of time.
for ross <3
Valerie Aug 17
i saw you through
my heart-shaped
rose-tinted glasses:
i saw red flags
and turned them green,
i heard warning bells
and mistook them for fireworks,
i scraped my knees on your edges,
and thought the blood was ambrosia
(i knew you were trouble
but i put on my rose-tinted glasses
and thought it was love).
:( a healing poem, very difficult to write
Valerie Jan 17
learning to love yourself
when nobody
Valerie Jun 2018
once upon a time,
you painted my skies
and built my world.
you crafted a reality
of freckles spangled like
stars up your cheekbones
and the lights you lit in
my dark, hollow eyes.

once upon a time,
we were a collection
of chapped lips and bad breath,
lying on our backs on
country roads and suburban fields.
our bones were weary but still alive
with that frantic flame of

but once upon a time was then-
and we live in the now, which
is a journey I'm still going through.
and the thing about constructed realities
is they tend to fall apart (eventually)
and the thing about fires is that
they go out.

[nothing lasts forever].
it's been a while!
Valerie Feb 2018
teach young girls how to love themselves
so they'll trust a man who would do the same.
Valerie Feb 2018
from the moment you coat me in your stardust
i know i'm doomed for my heart to be torn into two,
i'm ready for a pulsating, whirlwind romance,
of two souls ricocheting from every dark corner.

i know my heart will shatter across the linoleum floor,
shards of red and glass tumbling from my open heart cavity,
dripping blood, desire and dignity, because everybody knows
the story of the harlequin girl and her daredevil charmer.
Valerie Mar 2018
you awaken galaxies in me
within the first conversation,
and we're fluorescent in this
cold grey world we're born in

coffee on the roof of your mouth,
your eyes wide and kaleidoscopic,
my dress is suffocating me by my waist,
and yet i'm still dancing to every beat with you

but then we fell apart in your usual way-
we didn't crash or burn, we just ran out
but i still see your face in every single crowd
because you're forever stitched on my sleeves

we didn't go down in a spectacular explosion,
it was more of a worn out melody tuning down,
and it's funny how i think about the past now
because back then i used to think my future was you.
just some thoughts
Valerie Feb 2018
we are a generation of sedation,

discursive, empty, godless children,

raised in the age of social media,

where the height of our emotions

lie in our 'thoughts and prayers',

and the best we can do is a touch of a button,

a share, a like, a tweet, a reaction documented,

rumination we pretend we've borne.

is it our intrepid numbness to it all?

after all, we are best known for

the plight for attention and validation,

or rather yet our entitlement and our narcissism,

terrorism doesn't have a face unless i see it,

and it begs the millennial question,

are we just a bunched of depressed sociopaths?

or is it because we are the privileged 20%,

nestle in the fringes of developed nations,

with our precious technology and our internet,

unbeknownst to a third world, a third world

we mourn according to how it benefits us.

after all, don't forget that in an emergency,

there is always 'thoughts and prayers'.

Valerie Apr 2018
the heat of your mouth
tastes like a thunderstorm
brewing from a distance away-
i'm so good at being careful but
i find myself getting caught in the storm
again and again and again.
Valerie Jan 7
you're my tropical paradise,
my favourite way to lose control,
my most potent addiction and
the fluorescent spark inside my heart-

when i take a dive into your oceans,
your thoughts and words are coral reefs-
your touch is tender and your kiss
is as sweet as the nectarines you pluck.

i hear angels in your tangerine voice
remnants of you in every memory-
tokens of your pearly white incisors
biting down on my satin pillow skin.

i'll rearrange my insides to fit you-
carving space and toss the rotten flesh out
i treasure your bronzed, sinewy arms and
the way you give out smiles so easily.

your fresh-soil gaze cauterize me,
burning unsolicited marks on my soul
and i could spend the rest of the universe
kneading my hands into your sunflower silks.
five stanzas wowzaaaa
Valerie Feb 2018
pick me apart,
tear me down,
strip me up,
skin and bones,
nothing else left-
you're a phantom
to me now,
and i'm haunted,
i have questions
did it mean
anything to you?
am i different?
just like others?
do i sweep
breath out from
your nicotine lungs?
do i make
you shake, quiver,
tremble before me?
am i forgettable-
a mistake or,
just another mark
on the scoreboard?
are we a
mere whimper in
the never-ending darkness,
or a sparkling
fizzle of a
firework, raining blue,
red and white?
all i want to
ask you is
was i like
the other girls
or am i
more to you?
three word poem challenge? idk
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