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May 4 · 37
e n e m e
most times,
I’m without words
without emotions
mute and frozen
reoccuring spurts of sadness
strikes me
and my heart becomes burden and heave
see, no one is more disappointed in me than me
I know that
no one hates me more than I hate myself
I show that
still, somehow

it’s a sick satisfaction I relish when my worse enemy glares back at me everyday
Oct 2021 · 297
h o l y l i n e n
sheloveswords Oct 2021
he swallows me in his arms at night
and wears me when he’s most vulnerable
In honor,
I clothe him
unbeknownst to him
while he sleeps
the angels and I meet
and we celebrate him
Aug 2021 · 418
It’s getting cold
sheloveswords Aug 2021
Why taunt me?
your words **** me in its bed
then boxes me in its ring
Why haunt me?
inflicted by our sweet memories
echos of your voice in my ears
I have your deceitful truth
along with your back to keep me warm . . .
and cold
Nov 2020 · 57
aim to
sheloveswords Nov 2020
my body begs
it needs to be pleased
Nov 2020 · 75
get out
sheloveswords Nov 2020
the further I drift
the darker I dream
Sep 2020 · 320
well, I hate me too
sheloveswords Sep 2020
it all ends with the inevitable, you hating me in the end.
Jul 2020 · 276
Veracus Tragos
sheloveswords Jul 2020
Why, even, start something so beautiful...when it’s going to end so ugly? 

                            Copy Right 2020
Jun 2019 · 183
sheloveswords Jun 2019
Painting with a twist
Paint me with your kiss
Stroke me with your brush
Stroke me till I blush

Oil me in your pastels

Your lavenders soothes me well
Hang me on your wall

Until you’re ready to use me...

Copy Right 2020
sheloveswords Dec 2017
My thoughts alone arrest me
Your fresh iron bars fills my vicinity &
it protects me
from my anxious flights
I fight with
with my back against the wall
and an uncontrollable tremble
my body rains this dew of unwavering terror
thoughts of errors
forms theses arrows
and I follow them to my demise
but if he opens this cage
and I can see further than my eyes
I may just as well
walk to my own ****** suicide

Copy Right 2020
Dec 2017 · 440
So Let's just be frank
sheloveswords Dec 2017
there's a peace of mind
I'm on a journey for
scavaging and hunting for
what belongs to me
my sanity
I can't let you have
my love
and turn it into profanity
a curse
a joke
my deep passion soaking into your hands
as I watch you carelessly play in the dirt
here it comes
the hurt
races against joy
but insanity has come to steal the race
and the crowd makes the noise
I feel so out of place
I fell so deep into you, I no longer felt the light
then my skin became cold
following my emotions, or lack there of
my soul began to decipher
what feeds and what destroys

I am now waiting for my mind to fall in line
to find peace
my thoughts to find ease
finding a way to re-write our history
your name rings the very bell that controls my tears
when I close my eyes
I see yours
I repaint your lips and each word spoke
I hate you
then I love you
you watch me entangle with my emotions
you feed my despair
you stir my commotion
I feed you your energy that you allow to be stole
I fed you half of me
there's no way I can be whole
playing this game
your poker face is so perfect
and unphased
while I'm on this trip to neverland
a journey alone I never planned.

I need a peace of mind
a peace of mind I'll give you
you were my sickness
I need to heal you
disinfect the wounds you caused
the ulcers of false hope
the emptiness,
you wasted my time
you misplaced my crown
a blue river I have cried
its time for my smile to return now
....because even if you say it's not over
I know I wont die

Copy Right 2020
sheloveswords Dec 2017
will all the man who will fail me, please stand up.

you will be escorted out of my life.
Nov 2017 · 481
but the world did not end
sheloveswords Nov 2017
he hates me but no more than I hate myself
he takes from me but not more than what I've taken from myself
I feel his pain, anger, and hurt more than I feel his love
but that's because he has none to give
between his own lips he admitted it

its not like I'm worthy of it anyhow
it could all end any hour
because through and out of all this
in his eyes
I am not the same woman anymore

Copy Right 2020
sheloveswords Oct 2017
Searching for the strength
          to write again . .

Copy Right 2020
Aug 2017 · 302
We will all get by
sheloveswords Aug 2017
I dont know if it is the clouds in my head or the souls in my bed

or the tainted pleasures


of pouring
I rather blaze

In place of worry
I rather praise

and pray

that we all find our way

on this cold ground
with this frozen breeze

I don't have parents or

or a grandma to pray for me

so lately my ruthlessness has generously been on display for me
to be able to stand for Him and for myself.
Jul 2017 · 374
Constant Shower
sheloveswords Jul 2017

the flood
the waves

of this static despair

the tears

I can begin to hear them form
I confess my sins to see if the rain would cease to pour


I can swim in my tears.
It is my preferred way to drown.

Constant showers
my ocean floors cannot be found

the waves pound
and the sea roars

I pray depression sees my worthlessness and not want me any more

I pray that I find that purpose, that peace, and that sanity, that everyone I see lives for.

Copy Right 2020
Jul 2017 · 297
Lord, Please Forgive me
sheloveswords Jul 2017
lately I have been questioning why
I am never satisfied
I seen a bird the other day
whose live was taken away
before it ever got a chance to return back to it's nest
I can't seem to stop complaining on earthly favors
inspirited dangers
and my companion seems to be tired and stressed because he is constantly under attack
its a battlefield
he sleeps with his hard hat
to protect from my fury
this undying sadness has taken shelter in me
rejecting to leave
I am ejecting to breathe
I must find away

before my demons drag me to hell stay

Copy Right 2020
Jun 2017 · 523
I Am Almost Saying Goodbye
sheloveswords Jun 2017
what is the good in bye?

maybe we will see in time
or somewhere in our dreams
after we close that door or
drop the curtain to end the scene

but you know
this time

my heart doesn't hurt too bad
maybe by human nature
I've adapted to the inevitabilities
I've finally learned to grasp
those things that use to damage my soul so much
but not these days
I see a possible hope twinkling like the oceans in the skies
I see a possible chance of my happiness in the stars that are swimming above our heads
but your firmament always seem to block me  
my humility never seems to stop me from making an
absolute fool of myself because for your love that is what I would do
but for my love
        am I willing to the the same?

Copy Right 2020
May 2017 · 346
Cold Bed
sheloveswords May 2017
chilling sheets
there are
crystallized tears
on these  frozen pillows
I lay still but
my silhouette willows
through the winds from the window
that we kept open
last night
was an exception
I had to focus

        to give heat
once again I found myself
laying in a cold bed
with another being
beside me and
Still I Stay
like I'm Jodeci in the 90s
the temperature drops now
there are snowflakes all around me
his frost then surrounds me
this cold bed holds me
I am so warmed
I survived another moment
May 2017 · 317
Poetic Blues
sheloveswords May 2017
from the top of my crown
his blues come traveling down
sweet paresthesia claiming my arms
grabbing my hands
he gives me this case of poetic blues

he strings my instrument
his rhythmical melody soothes
and tunes
my uncontrollable side

it is finally tamed

oh, the blues that flows down my thighs at the sound his name
is another debate

it went from I putting a spell on you
to you putting a spell of me
this has caused
a swap of fate
the waves of me swimming on top of you
or the calm of you floating on top of me
oh, the blues that flows down and travel to my feet

gives me the strength to stand in this cold dark world
with out this blessing I would have surely sunk
I dwell
I survive
I dance
to this case of poetic blue funk
Apr 2017 · 617
sheloveswords Apr 2017
inevitably tempted to touch me
breathe on my neck
and remind me
re -iterate to my being
dive deep inside of me
and plant
and dwell
and reside inside of all of my angst
we could live there
and make love
until the sun gives light
to where my ion has

Copy Right 2020
Apr 2017 · 821
a poem for you
sheloveswords Apr 2017
I loved you in another space and time
a place where I did not exist
all I lived to breathe was we
the nurture, the soil, the growth
the seed
that we were fixing our hands to plant has now vanished
I am left savagely searching for those promises and words
that still floats in my soul
the free radicals
stripping my bones
from the same nourishment
you once provided
read between my words
within them
my love is somewhere hiding

Copy Right 2020

- Tribute to Donny Hathaway -
Mar 2017 · 806
Allow Him to be a Man
sheloveswords Mar 2017
I'm allowing him to be a man
I'm letting him spend all of the money inside of his pocket
until there is lint aslumber in his wallet
for him to feel the need and know the deed that he must provide
I allow him to make the critical decisions and life altering choices for him to know that he is fact the man of the house hold
I fall in line
I give him time
I let him breath
I let him know my divine femininity sometimes get the best of me
to the point that
I can't help but to worry
to care
to be mad at him
to stare
at my hero, my all that I want inside and out of a man
I allow him to be a man
I let him experience his frustration
and channel his anger even if that means I watch his fist ball
and maybe hit a wall
for him to know that
He has strength
He has emotion
I allow him to be a man and notice that he should never put his hands upon a woman
I anger him
to help teach him you must forgive
you must feel
we must not fight
it is human to be angry at me but he learns to never bring it to the bed before he holds me tight within his ebracing arms at night
a man learns never to go to sleep upset
I allow him all the means that he need in order for him to know
that he must protect
and he protects his queen
I am utterly satisfied
when I feel the damsel in distress I know in his built tower I can hide
and I am safe
I allow him to be a man and know He is the King
I am the Queen and I know my place
at his side
the adornment for my man
I will not hide
I allow him to be a man and position me anyway he please
I acknowledge him as my man
every time I fall down and get on my knees
for him
I quease for him
I pray for him
I submit to him
I slay for him
My King of Solomon
My Boaz, I am your servant
I would uncover and lay at your feet
if you please
I am your Ruth as you bless me
I am your possersorship, you may dress me
and give me life
heal with me
walk with me into the light
blinding the impossibilities
because my man is altogether capable
my man is able
my man is strong
my man is dominance
my man is home
to where my heart is
I allow him to be a man and decide if he wants to live
if he wants to love
if he wants fight
if he wants to give up
if he wants to feel
I allow my man to be my shield
to be my all
I allow him to fall
so he can get back up
I am allowing him
to be the best manifestation of his man that he could possibly be
for himself
for us all
for this world
for his family
for Yah and
my most delicate
I allow for him to be a man
my man
for me

Copy Right 2020
Feb 2017 · 256
forbidden soul
sheloveswords Feb 2017
my soul is broken and wordless
in the depths of loneliness combining
the deficiency from lack of love
there is no poetry to report
I am starving with hopelessness
in any case
who loves the person who loves everyone else?

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2016 · 276
Wake Up, Soul
sheloveswords Nov 2016
The need to be needed
is falsity alone
your journey is your rode
perfectly carved for your feet
intentionally prone to your stride

the repetition
the system
the matrix caving in and expanding as one
***** dancing

the insult to be able to breathe
is a bullet to my gun

a breath taken before conceived
a birth before life begun

surround and bond the thieves
but the sheep are asleep
during the battle of the war

during the only chance to defeat
the front line that you've been assigned to

they put your very own flesh and blood
as an opponent
their horses are galloping with death
on their breath to find you

are you too blinded by the smoke from your guns or the smoke from your lungs?
the plots to dehumanize, destroy, and abandon  your young
doesn't mind you?
Does the mysteries and fulfillment of the Most High not find you?

Peace and Wisdom are the most beautiful women
still awaiting for your attention
for your focus
this war we are fighting against our own flesh and blood is it worth it?

the man you are killing
the life you are stealing
do you know that is your brother?
that woman crying and dying over the lifeless body of her son, did you know that is your mother?

IF Yah was just

Please open your eyes and realize
His hands are on us
We are made in His Image
We are made in His Love
His living words breath right inside us
but you wont be able to see it until you wake up

wake up, soul
wake up
you've been asleep to long
the street lights are on
and it time to make up
for way that has been lost from the generations of slumber and strategical attacks to break up the most deepest fulfilling intimate connection that you will have in this present of a lifetime.
Nov 2016 · 859
sheloveswords Nov 2016
You have to learn to continuously feed love
or else
love will feed on you.*

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2016 · 507
Resulting In
sheloveswords Nov 2016
I am convicting myself of loving you
the most loneliest trial to attend
alone I sit on the stand
I raise my right hand
to God
that there is a truth
I am hiding
burying inside me
a national treasure
of finding
the truth
I love you
I see your amazing
I admire the weakness of your strength
those elements of you that lack
the sight of eyes
hands couldn't even feel
I have to leave you
I don't want to
you have to leave me
with silence filling my ears
completely full
of my tears that feed me
my fears that keep me
from living my life
without you here
your laugh has become the best sound on Earth
your smile has carved itself tattoo on my skin
scrubbing the lust off
fighting the demons you left within
as I opened my life for you to fill me
I wait for the rest of you to leak out of me
but all in love is not fair
now I am condemning myself to the only lie told
I had to do all that I could
to get away from you

since I didn't get my way with you
Aug 2016 · 779
sheloveswords Aug 2016
He is broken, his pieces
are scattered around and
he blames me for being the
person that found them and
he hates me for knowing
the anatomy of his dismantled puzzle

The pieces that yearns for love
I know how many there are
his parts hiding in the spent years
I know how far they are from
completing him wholly
they only want him to love me
and to defeat the grim that is
imprisoning him
inside of his own reality of insanity
in this severed mind that he has grown to possess

This preciously shattered jar of clay
shining on my marbled floor
I regret not catching him sooner
but his scattered remnants I adore
he is the stars in my lunar
my gravity exists for him
my planets rotate

he is my perfect paradoxical mockery of fate
my most favorite enigma
placing his pieces to the belonged
I am bewilderingly profounded
I must complete before I deliver this masterpiece
of the most beautiful disaster that has fallen upon my hands

Copy Right 2020
Aug 2016 · 343
Sad in Silence (10W)
Jun 2016 · 518
sheloveswords Jun 2016
my thoughts of you are raw
if touched
pain might follow after the
surface has been breached
my initials are exposed
you have walked inside of me
pondering in my mind
you have found a new home
inside my affection and passion
you belong in my arms with my love
holding you tightly caressing your cares
verbing your actions
my longing
has made me sore
raw to the touch
your love has made me pure
your least is enough
to make me
dance in you
swim in you
facing my deepest fear
I rather drown in your love
then watch it disappear
ideal suicide
I have been living to love you
I have been fighting to erase you
magically replace you with the silhouette
of the figment of my imagination
A man who can do for me what I have been indulging
This man he can love me and make me his home
and all of a sudden
through the forestry of thoughts in my mind
I don't feel so raw anymore
May 2016 · 642
sheloveswords May 2016
Violet to your ears
I slowly watch my heart pierce
itself to your skin
engraved into your passions
each word,
each action,
each thought within
every hand motion,
every verb.
Your daily stance
I've seen myself inside of your hands
& I felt so home
So comfortable.
The though of me never being alone
was merely touchable
made my temple sing the blues
a saxophone blowing in you
Ricocheting my melody
It's violet to my ears
rose water
his love fell on me

*now his garden is all I want to hear
Feb 2016 · 344
Hidden Treasure
sheloveswords Feb 2016
He gave me poetry when we first met
he had it perfectly wrapped in a deep purple bow
satin swimming all around
resting inside was his heart painted gold
Jan 2016 · 1.2k
Lingering Taste
sheloveswords Jan 2016
I can taste your breath
merged with my smoke
as I inhale to capture
the last wind
that was taken from me

& now I watch you dance away

Copy Right 2020
Jan 2016 · 282
the things he do to me
sheloveswords Jan 2016
with no words

with no sound

with no hands

with no hesitation

with no hate

with no force

                                  *he makes me write poetry
Dec 2015 · 405
Falling in love
sheloveswords Dec 2015
The best lesson I learned on falling in love is how to float in each moment of laughter and passion before the long fall of crashing and eventually hitting rock bottom, which turned out to be the most loneliest coldest emptiness of a place where I naively thought happily ever after could possibly exist.

Copy Right 2015
Patty Ann
Dec 2015 · 329
My Happy Feet
sheloveswords Dec 2015
I hear
I feel
     the music
of your
     heart beat . . . .

Incase you're wondering
     why I can't stop dancing
sheloveswords Dec 2015
I didn't have to tell you I Love You

my body spoke it for me

Copy Right 2020
Dec 2015 · 414
Ignorance is Bliss
sheloveswords Dec 2015
when times falls upon your hands
cradling each indentation
of the lines that predispose
our vitality
every hearts measure
of every unveiled emotion
wrapped around each soul
that didn't deserve such tenderness
you freely provided

when time calls for every ear
to anticipate the knowledge of the
conscious thoughts that flows pass
toxic lips espoused from a sweet soul
who would stand the words?

who would lock their lips?
open their ears
and hear
cease listening with their eyes
to see the unseen
to know the unknown
a fool of this generation
one would be
because in these times
ignorance is bliss
it has found itself a nice comfy home
to thousands of lost souls
wandering in this Earthly abyss
Nov 2015 · 994
With No Curren$y
sheloveswords Nov 2015
He does not remember paying for my love,

I have the half ripped down the middle
tear smeared receipt
in my hand
as we speak

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2015 · 1.3k
Weak Days
sheloveswords Nov 2015
You are the perfect ending to my Monday
                 every night of the week

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2015 · 716
Matthew 11:28
sheloveswords Nov 2015
God said*

  *"All those who are weary and burdened come to me,  and I will give you rest. "

His words are the arms that is holding me to sleep tonight.

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2015 · 465
With this kiss
sheloveswords Nov 2015
He fills my mouth with words
I fill his with verbs
our unspoken acts of love
dance and withers
at the vibration of our energies
with this kiss I tie our spirits together
as one Earth
as one synergy
Nov 2015 · 687
Open Door
sheloveswords Nov 2015
My days and nights are often cursed
with routinely thoughts of you

Coming and leaving as you please.

My heart is in shambles.
tearing up my emotions.
wrecking the place.

I must have misplaced the keys

to the door locked inside my heart,
that you obviously can't see.
Nov 2015 · 501
s a c r i f i c e
sheloveswords Nov 2015
I know you love reading so
I created pages inside of me
with hope to be the
best jumble of words
your eyes have
ever laid across.
Nov 2015 · 530
Dive Soul
sheloveswords Nov 2015
You open my eyes
to see more
than my sense  
would allow
Nov 2015 · 939
sheloveswords Nov 2015
I fell in love with the pain of missing you

            and the torture of your smile

embedded inside of my thoughts

Copy Right 2020
Nov 2015 · 782
sheloveswords Nov 2015
As we lay
with passion between us
I whispered sweetly into his ear
to go deeper
He looks me in my eyes and says

"With each stroke in and out
Of you
I learn you
I travel your soul
and explore every atom
combined that forms you
into the beautiful queen
that I hide inside
when the world comes crumbling down
Everytime you cleanse me
with your nourishing juices
in my soul
my garden grows
and being inside of you reveals to me
of the man I was placed on this Earth to be"

of course I came...

Copy Right 2015
©Patty Ann
Nov 2015 · 577
I find myself
sheloveswords Nov 2015
constantly waiting for someone to love me because I have never met the strength that I always had to love myself
constantly waiting on you to learn me because I never used the knowledge that I have living inside of  me to learn myself
I find myself
constantly waiting on you to read me because I never knew that on this beautiful brown face of mines that
I already have the eyes of finding the beauty inside of the readings itself
Oct 2015 · 330
sheloveswords Oct 2015
your skin held captive under my hard keratin
I am finding myself
passionately carving my favorite drawing
of this over spilling ecstasy
you easily made
the walls that have been build
Finally I get the pleasure
of knocking them down
passing over
each river flooded by our fears
flowing by our tears
gravity pulling me down
attempting to own me and mark
its estate
my friends think it's crazy
It's only the other side of love
others refuse to show

Copy Right 2020
Sep 2015 · 328
Pillows Painted Wet
sheloveswords Sep 2015
I've grown tired of crying myself to sleep at night
soaking my pillow
my mind makes me believe that
through the currents of my nightly oceans
I master swimming in my sleep

Copy Right 2020
Sep 2015 · 246
This A.M.
sheloveswords Sep 2015
Last night I feel in love
and when I woke up
I was covered in you.
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