I was of an age
drunk in a rage
trapped in a cage
spilled on a page
escaped onto stage
writ large a sage.

The north star was burned
by BLM activists said it was
too white in the dark night
blinded the hatred of sight.
The world has lost its way
can't tell night from day.

We lost our souls
and digits in deep
blue seas saltwater
a deep blue sleep.
Drop a tear in the sea
for my memory
kiss me in Davy Jones
locker just let it be.

Healing takes time. It's a process, stages.
   My deepest condolences to your family.
   You're too young! You're too old!
   I was your age once. I understand.
   It always turns out okay in the end.
   It was meant to be. Make the best of it.
   He was no good for you from the start.
   I always knew you just settled with him.

Youth's arrogance gone now,
life's hard lessons learned.
Nothing is ever owed to me.
Everything I have is earned.
I had many friendly bridges
but every **** one I burned.

I smell your hair
I love you then
we kiss us there
perfect within.

When I up and die
bury me in the sky.
Bury me in the shade
of the tree we made.
Bury me in a tomb
forever in the womb.
Bury me in your heart.
The end is just a start.

God created us. We created God in our image.
God made a Garden of Eden for us.
God created heaven and hell.
God made the 10 Commandments.
God made big and small sin.
God took fear and made guilt.
God created right and wrong.
We made a Bible about creation
and Angels cast from Heaven.
We made prisons for the sinners.
We made pulpits for false prophets.
God created man created God.

Lover leaves. No reason.
  My nerves are on edge
  maybe it's the season
  we stand upon the ledge.

  We're always drunk again.
  The moon is huge tonight.
  Where in hell have we been?
  Both are blinded  by the light.

Mrs. Reddy
Susan T.
Jeanie D.
Sister Mary Timothea
Virginia K.
Queen of Hearts
Kathy C.
Cindy I.
Betsy W.
Corpse like lover
Karen L.
Boston, MA
Georgine D.
Terry/Tara M.
Lynette K.
Jayne O.
Queen of Hearts

The blood red stain
in the pouring rain
no voices after all
left to take the fall
I loved you yesterday
debt I can never pay
lock me in your jail
our love was stale.
A scarecrow smiles
as they turn dials.

Vincent's starry madness
let loose with his paints
ghost's at Midnight Mass
praying for living saints.

Cotton obsessed, ***** oppressed,
Southern charm and whipping the help
mint juleps in the oak tree's shade as
Delta planters tamed this flooded jungle
with a thousand slaves bought in chains
filled with a savage anger of lost homes
from lands beyond reach of our caring.
A noble savage we tried to free in Civil War.
Free to live in squalor with **** schools and
**** jobs and **** projects to call home.
Don't fear these truths. Don't stare blind.
Carry this prayer to your altars and pulpits
and shout from pews demanding justice.
Sing of misfortune and tomorrow's hope.

blood cords stand out in my neck
  throbbing with my beating heart
  never a true ending or a true start
  I barely played a supporting part
  water now ankle deep ink blot shark
  waits for Davy Jones feeding at dark.

The clock ticks
like a bomb as
I obey the march
of time to
another year
and candles on
another cake that
just makes me fatter
and mirrors that lie and
broke bathroom scales.

I tear my fierce claws into you
without apology. I need to eat.
Put us in zoos and take pictures
feeding us like pets. We burn bright
in the night as Blake set us in print.
God cast us in hell fires furnace.

She left in Autumn's harvest
rich reds and orange and rust.
I kept her love for many years
through all the neglected tears.
My nerves all burn in my shame
fearing she can't recall my name.

Priced as marked or best offer.
    Some damaged more than others.
    A small tear
    a workplace affair
    a bigger tear
    a torrid affair with broken promises
    devastated barely pumps
    he always cheated and blamed her
    blown out selling for parts
    he betrayed and took the kids
    she overdosed and stabbed her heart
    for good measure. Tears roll down
    but can never make things right.
    Make an offer after all why not?

Everything is just beyond reach.
   I don't care anymore. Almost.
   I remember lover's smells. Almost.
   I remember my children. Almost.
   I know you. Almost.
   A golden retriever is familiar. Almost.
   My face in a mirror is a stranger.
   Almost, but not quite. Disappearing!

There we were sitting on bar stools
side by side and talking about women
and the way they smell. Some earthy and
some flowers and some like stale *****.
We told sick jokes and remembered good
old days when men were fierce and girls
were gentle and tamed their beasts.
We parted. He paid my tab. Yellow teeth.
I remember his laugh. It was sincere.
I stumbled out drunk but he walked sober.

I watch the wall clock
seconds tick then tock
stranger blows my ****
I come on my left sock
and ask what's your name
she says I'm all the same.

I was Jesus Christ walking
  on the ocean out to dolphins
  playing on the sea to toss
  ***** to fetch like my dog
  used to do before he died
  and left me broke apart
  never could find my heart
  I don't know where to start

I let my shadow go today.
I set my youngest free to be
herself with her own shadow.
She will call me less now but
she's in love and I won't let
it matter. God, I'll miss her.

A magic box where all of your
ugliness and cruelty are forgiven
when you recite the sin list to
your priest and perform penance.
Guilt  lives in shadows of the
heart always whispering madness.

A collection of stars
in my childhood jars
next to my little bed
morning all are dead.

My eyes are burning
my mind is squirming
the tale is turning
my heart is learning
never trust lust's girl
seems the perfect pearl
just a suicidal squirrel
always loves unsure.

The past like fog forgotten.
What will you do from now on?
The one eyed cat is Jesus Christ
the giant dog is God Almighty.
Easter is the great escape.
Your death is only for you.
I'll nail me to your cross.
I'll own my sins. You are free.
I try my best half measures.
Forget resurrection. Fly, Dove.

There was a time
we lit up a room.
Toast of the town,
roses' full bloom.
Now we watch it
from a dark tomb.

As angels go Dorothy was my favorite!
She knew our talents. She believed.
She helped us believe in ourselves.
She laughed the hardest, she loved us all,
she led these lost souls into places of peace.
We miss you dearly. I miss you most of all.
The scarecrow, tin man and cowardly lion.
We'll meet at the end of the yellow brick road.

I remember tiny creases
my cavalcade of strife
scattered puzzle pieces
fragments teasing life.

Absinthe at dawn
a night club,
a dance hall
  and bordello.
The world swept up
in Bohemian revolution
bright colors explode
inside addled brains
full of acid and my turn
next or I steal your
planet Earth for my
Butterfly collection.
Orbits in orbits inside
more orbits brick on
brick make a church
with graves outside
fading light at vespers
when they pray forever.

Come now, child, life is long.
Learn loves, hates and pains
as you hum your silly song
a cancer with cruel refrains,
never really actually a Fair.
Most of the herd won't care.
Some will always beware
of a bad luck death stare.

Sleight of hand innocent lies
never real flesh and blood
just a corpse full of flies
bloated and floating in a flood.

Drunk. Insane feel of pleasure
am I with her now or all alone?
My mirror is a shattered treasure
priceless piece of polished chrome.

57 Chevy we made our first child
broke society in summer of love
married in West Side Story wild
we woke and found a broken dove.

I am kind.
  I am cruel.
  I am loved
  and a fool.
  I am guilty.
  I am free.
  You'll find me
  in Agony.

I finally forgot how to breathe
I've lived in a vacuum so long.
I drown in an ocean full of life,
surface days later in this song.
We confess our serial betrayals
acting like lovers forgiving
turn our black souls outward
continue to act out our living.

My life is fading away
day by day going astray
I can't place you I forget
I love you but I regret
I forgot your name again
I know where we've been
I remember cans on cars
cheers in so many bars
laughter and pleasure
beyond any measure.

There's a poem in there if
   I can strip away the debris
   and polish it like silver
   and read it at a posh affair.
   I'll use a singsong baritone
   to give it gravity like Dylan.

Pose with me. Smile.
   I'll be your friend
   in a picture frame
   'til the bitter end
   nailed to the cross
   of your destruction
   buried in shame
   and a resurrection.

We were young and beautiful.
     We tasted each other and feasted
     on our banquet. I smell you still
     and I'm 73 and you're beside me in
     bed in dreams that are more alive
     than my daily crawl toward death.

The world is splendid. It's
     bright and loud and colorful.
     I could blow a fuse and bring
     my machine to a sudden halt.
     I keep my light low and noise
     whispers and never love fully.
     I walk among the tombstones of
     those who've gone before me as
     others will dance upon my grave
     and drink toasts to this madman.

I'm going to say goodnight
and say my prayers
and hope to God
there won't be bears!

Kick the cat and beat the dog.
   Burn the children's presents.
   Leave them alone in the fog.
   Desert them with resentments
   chasing lust's false promises
   thinking love finds us again.
   Only more willing mistresses
   never love, just lusts' pain.

We've all gone crazy lately.
I don't wear a tie or cut my hair.
I smoked some hash and lost my
mind a little bit. Save me from
a world I don't recognize anymore.
I dress like a clown and eat drugs
to keep me up and down and level.
Friends are straight or hippies each
seeking their very own Nirvana and
I walk a tightrope above the madness.

Our baby got tangled
up in tubes and died.
Buried our lust with
the forgotten bride.
Forgive my lost way
I want to want you
it just won't be today

Just dying to be grown up
forget my father I'm a man
I shave, drink beers in a cup
war is my first time woman
taste of Eve and ammunition
boys line up on walls to die
murmured Act of Contrition
chewed up in jaws of a lie.

Wearing a top hat and a straight
  jacket with a monocle and goatee.
  He owns everything like God does.
  Nobody will ever tell him different.
  He'll silence you and disappear you.
  He'll bury your friends and family.
  He'll define what's real and false.
  He's the man who rules the world.
  Our lives are in his cattle cars on
  our way to his indifferent endings.

I try drawing you from  old memories
   but can't get your eyes right. I can't see
   the body that destroyed my earnest vows.
   I can't see your warm young ******* and
   ******* that grew so hard by my caress.
   I can't see us dancing naked in the dark.
   I wish I'd kept the photos. I cremated us
   in an ashtray and I can't see us anymore.

Hanging on old bones
I'm parchment skin
my story tattooed
litanies of my sin.
I rattle when I breathe
and forget most things
except my lovers and
my wedding rings.

They tried to break me.
I kept spitting out the bit.
You can't tame the righteous  
Fire burned my spirit.
Wedding bands won't
shackle me like chains
I buck and snort and rebel
burn you with my flames.

Do I exist as I or us?
Can you be alone or
are you a part of me?
We must memorize
the truth as it is told
over the mind Net.
Our sky is yellow.
Our meat is farmed
inside a test tube.
We procreate alone,
hallucinate  together.
I don't feel pain or
loneliness. I never
cried but miss it.