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let me indulge in these fantasies
alternate realities where I’m happy.

The best version of me, that’s what I
want to be
Al Grant Jun 13
on the dawn of Eid
I sat there
not knowing why I did it
Soldiers sent to Vietnam
Mindless, jarheads;
bombs to the ground.

Pointless bureaucracies
Kafkaesque fantasies
Let me sit here lonely
smoking,
sinning as I breathe.
Al Grant Jun 13
A shadow haunts me.
seething, seeking, my spines chilling  
Does he want the sinners?
Red linens? white lines? lies?
And I, a mere human
straight bare, on the floor. ****.
While -you’re standing there

In a memory I have of you
from my ill medicated dreams
fluorescent heavy black tar;
seeping black divine obstructing
the reality twine
Al Grant May 18
On my lowest days
thoughts of you are always there to stay
I tried to replace you with heartbreak
or anything else
But you're always there to stay.

Sometimes I wonder if you think of me.
Would you imagine me older?  
Or do you only remember a little girl,
back to when you stole my innocence
And inserted yourself into my memories;
Always there to stay. Always there to remind me.
Al Grant May 17
As a child, enthralled by smoke
my mind-controlled by the
chief priest of vestal virgins
to guard over the fire
sentenced to keep the flame
and its elements remain
in Perpetuum.

it goes away, but like cancer
it came back; into my soul.
The gate of irony came crashing in
after celebratory kisses from Himeros,  
and flows of Smirnoff

Now with age
after a couple of decades
mists, clouds, and storms are
puffing out my mouth
— and nose.
Al Grant May 17
Maybe it’s not your fault
              How I always feel deprived of attention
              How I always feel insufficient

              How you always make me stay when you’re lonely
              The air between us so thin, yet
              I’m going astray —forcing the ashtray to weigh
              more, more, and more!
              The flare on my lips heavy
              Grounding me with gravity,
              through the cloudy air
              my body numb,
              my mind the calm sea of:
              lousy despair.
an excerpt from my longer piece
Al Grant May 15
In my mind,
you design your poems
to cede my mundane soul.
if so, I want to let you know
you’ve succeeded your goal

65 euros spent for a week’s
worth of ****, And I sit here
on the weekend trying to read;
really, really liking you,
my Kings and Queens.
To HP, with love
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