Nix W

Nix W Sep 2020

Wind rustles a light tumble of leaves dance across the stones ebbed within the dirt under my feet.

I’ve come to see the birds. They sing a song of laughter and sun. I’ve also come to see the plants. They’ve grown so glistening with orange hues and drops of diamond water.

I stop just beyond the fern fronds. Closing my eyes and hearing the woods. If I could. I’d manifest these sounds into feelings, nameless and brewed into a delicate concoction of oak fermented sounds, consumed and nourished. The soul is at peace.

Nix W Jun 2020

Mr. Depression strikes again

Like a tugging feeing down
Yanking tight within my soul
It darkens my insides
And suddenly I feel cold
My head fills with sadness
And my mind sees only lows
My eyes begin to water
And my breathing heaves in slows
How absurd my feelings gather
Unfold and gush in times
It bottles up, my doing
As I steer away from lies
I just want to sleep
Sleep away all my tears
Sleep away all my woes
And sleep away all my fears
I hate this feeling (I say I wanna die)
It’s stupid yes I know and would I try?
It’s just this **** keeps getting thicker
Fumigating from within
Dense ash crumbling my light
Till I am weak and bent
Cradling my sorrow
Harbouring my woes
Sinking deeper in the abyss
A place where few people go

How do you ask for help when your not even sure what your needing help with????? Silence conjures up the most peculiar morbid thoughts.

Nix W Jun 2020

Doodle dee song

Lookie lookie lookie
Somethings written in my ******
It’s distaste for you will surely
Turn you into one real sookie
So don’t you lookie lookie lookie
In my private truthful ******
Cos I ain’t about to say no sorries
All because you want to nosey
And now your eyes have gone all sookie
All because you read my ******!

Doodling words in my book I made up this silly song.

Nix W May 2020

Tea break misery

As the cries of laughter echo and consume
My ears are still burning by those who have strewn. Such lies. These women prance around with idiocy grace, a shady snark of deceit and words coated with sincerity, meekly designed to hide the words, in between the lines, are glares and stares, mutters and whispers, laughing at’s and inside jokes. This I see and this I hear as I sit here drinking my tea.

It matters who you work with.

Nix W May 2020

Aquatic noose

Brace yourself. The tides come in. Let down your noose. No threats here. Water deliver. The remedy’s due. Kindly takeover. This one’s new. Oh sanctuary within this tide. Wrap me in waves. Smother my cries. Engulf my sorrows with salt, a million. I’ve let go. Welcome thee. This tides high and in I go. Welcome me, welcome me. My new found home.

A concoction of mixed feelings and this spills out.

Nix W May 2020

Thoughts for the night

Painted eyes. Do you see right? A mimic. A fake. A clone. A mistake. Tainted ears. Do you hear right? A muffle. A sound. A thing at night. Do I frighten you? Least of all. I am weak. No need to fear. This is not real. You aren’t either. But I still see you. And hear you. Now can I feel you?

May you manifest yourself by my dire need of seeking solace in you.