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9.4k · Sep 2019
You Misheard Me
Tony Tweedy Sep 2019
I write not for my arts sake...
I write for my hearts ache...

I write not to remind myself...
I write to re-mind myself...
I perform my own exorcisms through my keyboard
4.6k · Aug 2022
Kaleidoscope
Tony Tweedy Aug 2022
I look again upon the sky as I have done so many times before.
To see the change of natures' palette as sun sinks beyond horizon's floor.

The blue of daytime sky and the wisps of white and mottled gray,
give-way to golden inlaid mauve upon red curtain as amber fades away.

Hues of golden yellow that were present short moments before,
now lost beyond the silhouetted landscape as if cast to distant shore.

Flame upon the heavens, cloud lit as if scattered, precious jewels.
Colours of natures palette so vibrant, disobeying all artistic rules.

silhouettes of birds in flight etched in black upon the fading light,
All traversing in rapid beat of wing, to seek shelter from the night.

Trees and distant vistas mere shadows where sun did slide away,
as palette welcomes the new nighttime bidding farewell to passing day.
No brush stroke and no words can match it.... a fire like no other.
3.2k · Dec 2021
Restless
Tony Tweedy Dec 2021
Dark of night surrounds me, pillow below my head.
How long the many hours since I tumbled onto my bed?

Mind so filled with thought that clearly has me stressed.
Racing, scattered thought that just wont let me rest.

Blanket that feels loose and shifts to feel oh so tight,
and so it sets the pattern for this never ending night.

I know that I must sleep before the rise again of the sun,
in a world that cant relent from insistence things must be done.

My body urgent in its craving to be silent and be still,
but my mind just wont give in possessing the stronger will.

A discomfort on my left side, so I roll again to my right.
Countless repetition through the hours of a god forsaken night.

Nothing that I do brings a sense my mind is nearing calm,
I must try to get some sleep before clock sounds its alarm.

So the hours go, too many hours surely for just one night,
but too late now to rest as window reveals dawns early light.
Oh too many nights like this....
2.9k · Mar 2022
Beached (version 3)
Tony Tweedy Mar 2022
I stand upon a familiar shore,
of white sands and ocean waves,
looked upon so many years before,
you and I joined as true loves slaves.

Salten sea breeze fresh upon my face,
casting mist and haze like some dream,
where I see that other time in this place,
bound forever, or so it then did seem.

In this place I now stand so all alone.
as if drawn across rolling dark water,
to calmer days once warmly known,
before love like tide ebbed unto it's slaughter.

Days when loneliness was an unknown.
where sun was warm, and seas were still,
before any storm squall gales had blown,
or wave and wind wrought it's winters chill.

You alone were there to share my time,
I recall beauties smile upon your face,
beauty before tears performed their crime,
it was you that made this a perfect place.

But this sand now beneath my feet,
leads nowhere I would wish to go.
My memories now of loves defeat,
in a time my heart still longs to know.

Sand worn away and faded coastal dreams,
waves roll and ebb high upon the shore,
eroded memories by times cold extremes,
Never to know the beach as in those years before.
Even memories fade and become shadows of what they were.
The years erase thought the heart still knows that something was lost.
2.9k · Mar 2019
Bread Winner
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
I have a friend who is a surgeon a career of his decision.
Performing tonsillectomy and frequent circumcision.
Another friend who only meets with lepers lives by prostitution.
Both taking paths in life to live by their chosen best solution.
Both very different careers by choice and so many passing ships
Both surviving and living well and both taking lots of tips.
very borrowed ideas.... no doubt I am sick
2.6k · Mar 2022
Beached (re-write version 2)
Tony Tweedy Mar 2022
I stand upon a familiar shore,
of white sands and ocean waves,
looked upon so many years before.

Salten sea breeze fresh upon my face,
casting mist and haze like some dream,
where I see that other time in this place.

In this place I now stand so all alone.
as if drawn across rolling dark waters,
to calmer days once warmly known.

Days when loneliness was an unknown.
where sun was warm and seas were still,
so long before any storms had blown.

I recall your smile there upon your face,
and you were there to share my time,
it was you that made this a perfect place.

But this sand now beneath my feet,
leads nowhere I would wish to go.
My only memory now of  loves defeat.

Waves roll and ebb high upon the shore,
sand worn away and faded coastal dreams,
the remains of the beach,
that was ours before.
Even memories fade and become shadows of what they were.
The years erase thought the heart still knows that something was lost.
2.2k · Aug 2020
Why It Is Dark
Tony Tweedy Aug 2020
You step out into the world and its tendrils seek to entwine.
It takes away my hopes and all the dreams I once held as mine.

You are faced with expectations and choices so not of your own.
You come to think it not so bad when life is both empty and alone.

It becomes just easier to forget about hope and any form of dream.
Responsible to self and away from expectations endless scream.

You close the world outside behind your safeties solid door.
And give up on love and dream like clothes discarded on the floor.

You accept a life of little value and so too the feel it will never end.
All for reassurance outside consequence wont reach in to offend.

I write of being sad and lonely in many of the poems that I write.
But I am conscious, it is I who cast love and hope out into the night.
I know there are many who have come to feel this way. A loss of something that makes trusting the world and others just so difficult to do. Sometimes finding a light at the end of the tunnel doesn't have the appeal others may expect us to have. Controlling the light switch even in darkness offers a level of security that some of us prefer. Your expectations scare us and it is what made us seek darkness as refuge.
2.1k · Mar 2022
Amulet
Tony Tweedy Mar 2022
Carved in purest precious stone
so rare and undoubtedly unique.
Endowed with natures fortune,
the perfect Amulet of which I speak.

A talisman of unmatched power,
to ward every dark cloud from the sky.
So lustrous in its beauty,
that it just captivates my eye.

A something so uncommon,
to fire and ignite my imaginative mind.
So magic and so elusive,
dreams and hopes of such to find.

Glimpses of the wonder and the beauty,
that have caught me in their spell.
A desire to hold the Amulet,
my future and my fortune time can only tell.
New love has a magic..... how rare the wonder.
Tony Tweedy Jun 2022
Through mist of mind the thoughts again come lurking out of haze,
a time once given to a true love, giving rise to many blessed days.
Before a heart was torn and severed from my body's very soul,
a time where all of me was contented and felt complete and whole.

Seeming so long ago the memory yet not distant or younger past,
fates promise of true happiness, seemingly written in the di as cast.
Soft words yet still haunt me, once again tears run from my eyes,
as mind recalls the horror moment when heart learned all was lies.

Forever scared and left as broken, shards of who I was before,
no trust in love or hope, so never being able to be something more.
I cannot forsake the memories nor can I choose to hold them back,
for they always start at true love felt before launching a fatal attack.

The memory of that love I lost and the echo of mind "was it real?",
a soul will not let go that there was truth in how "true love" did feel.
So to keep the joy of love once known and how it should be still,
I have need for the memories that invade to hurt me at their will.
It still hurts..... always will
2.0k · Mar 2019
Balancing on One Foot
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
More often an optimist will see the goal, a pessimist the path.
If only we were both.
Perhaps that is why we seek not to journey alone?
Do opposites really attract? Is this what we really mean when we seek out our "other half"?
1.9k · Mar 2022
Captive
Tony Tweedy Mar 2022
If I could ride a white stallion,
wearing burnished armour of gold.
I would cross the high mountains
for my eyes on your smile to behold.

Across land scorched by suns fire,
droughts parched burning sand,
all this I could defeat and endure,
for a mere touch from your hand.

You have me captivated, enthralled
by means of your charm and your grace.
Entranced and passively subdued,
by beauties smile on your face.

How sad has become this world.
where poetry for a beauty is not news.
I behold the wonder and the beauty,
of my goddess, my passions true muse.
How daft a man can be made when a beauty looks his way.
1.9k · Jun 2022
Fragments
Tony Tweedy Jun 2022
My heart remembers there is more than this.
It recalls there being something warm and infectious.
When the beat had purpose beyond mere survival.
A throbbing and pulsating that gave power to emotion.

My mind glimpses a past that held joyous moments.
It recalls there being sensation and a fire in my core.
When every dream and hope had shape and form.
A memory made and cherished immune to times' flow.

My body longs for the thrills it once knew when young.
It recalls the dexterity lost through its aches and pains.
When pleasures could be made through another's touch.
A yearning for something that ageing stole in the night.

My soul cries for the sake of heart, mind and body.
It recalls the strength of being someone made whole.
When joy, happiness and love were something real.
A time when life was all and ending was so far away.
Fragments I am become,
heart,
mind,
body,
soul...
Dismembered by life and time.
Getting old and feeling it
1.9k · Nov 2021
Cosmic
Tony Tweedy Nov 2021
Two hundred billion galaxies, trillions upon trillions of stars,
And to reinforce our insignificance we search still for life on Mars.

We look upon a heaven so vast there is no rocket we could send,
that in a hundred thousand lifetimes could it ever near its end.

Twenty billion Earths scattered across all of time and space,
stupid to think we could be alone and its all about this place?

For over nine billion years the universe survived without our sun,
is it real to think when we arrived universal purpose had just begun?

The universe did not wait for us its evolution just carries on,
and so it will be in future times when all memory of us is gone.
explains itself
1.8k · Feb 2022
Something Went Wrong
Tony Tweedy Feb 2022
Whatever happened to the happiness,
from all those early childhood days.
Where laughter. joy and sunshine,
filled all of imaginations endless plays?

What became of the joyous music,
giving beat and harmony to the world.
When dream and hope could exist,
and all possibilities could be unfurled?

When did all this darkness fall,
to lay shadow so dark upon the lands,
as a dense foreboding that has been
summoned by greeds unsated demands?

When did dream and hope become,
just mere folly and wasted thought.
What happened to the morals and the ethics,
that as kids we valued and were taught?

When and where did all this go,
for everywhere I look such is just not there.
All has been replaced by a selfish world
of greed, hatred and down-trodden despair.

I know that in the course of time,
I am meant to see an old man's view.
But what worth and value of a world,
where hate and lies are sold as true?

Death and hatred fill this world,
in every rank corner that I see,
and in silent, desperate fear I wonder,
why we stood-by and let it come to be?
Ukraine burns. The climate rends retribution. Hatred is no longer hidden but openly endorsed or encouraged. China sits and waits while democracy suffers dementia. You can't tell me things are alright !!?
1.8k · Mar 2019
No Strings Attached
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
There are too many days..... I cant do this many days. Too many days where darkness wins. Fate laughs endlessly. I am Fate's comedic performer and he laughs without end. Like a donkey behind a carrot I am led and with the rasp of a donkey's bray Fate's laughter rings in my ears.
I don't think I can do this. Where joy is substituted by despair and happiness succumbs to death.... and the symphony of laughter is the tune. The strings on this puppet are frayed and worn but the puppeteer is relentless. How do you fix the strings of a puppet in motion? Who will catch the puppet if he falls? I can hear no answers above the laughter that rings in my ears and so this puppet on tattered strings dances on to the tune that Fate maintains. How long is a piece of string? It matters not if the string can carry no weight.
1.8k · Nov 2022
Dreamer
Tony Tweedy Nov 2022
Nightly I dream of you, an image so bright and clear,
the warmth of your breath, in closeness there upon my ear.

Silk gown neck open, revealing a shoulder bare,
perfect pale flesh, draped by the tresses of your hair.

Arms reach for each other, as we draw into embrace,
a vision of splendid wonder, the beauty of your face.

Eyes that link as one as we look into the others soul,
until our lips are joined, and we become a spirit whole.

Each night I dream this, as it plays out just the same,
as you rise to go out, through the door by which you came.

How strong my heartbeat pulses, each and every night,
to give way to lonely heartache as I wake to mornings light.
Dreaming of angels and love....
1.7k · Dec 2021
Shh!.... Silent Night
Tony Tweedy Dec 2021
"Tis the eve before Christmas and nights silence abounds.
Darkness has fallen and only slight breeze to make sounds.
All down the quiet street each house light is now turned out.
Many hours since merry occupants were moving about.
Tucked tight in their beds are each young girl and small boy,
awaiting the morn of Santa inspired mirth and pure joy.
I sit crouched in the hedge my senses alert and aloof,
This year I'll get him before his reindeer ***** on my roof.
Merry Christmas to all.
1.5k · Mar 2019
Sideshow Observer
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
I've been walking all alone in a sideshow
There has been passion and pain on this ride
There is a voice I hear calling
The voice rises from my souls very inside

For a time I didn't know what was calling
With my head as if lost at sea
But today I knew what was calling
It was all of my choices taunting me

I think of the people here in the sideshow
Like me they wonder around so confused
Every day they make their choices
But which ones do they choose?

We all go through life with choices
All as a blind man feeling his way
Always hoping for good choices
Ones that encourage the passion to stay

Passion can thrive on our choices
It can make our most memorable day
But a badly considered choice
Can chase forever our passion away

My trip has been filled with choices
Some rough and some divine
I have dealt with my choices
I have dealt with many that weren't mine

I am here near the end of the sideshow
I look back to where I have been
My eyes are filled with loneliness
I have lost most of the passion I've seen

When you get near the end of your sideshow
I hope you have learned from my way
I hope you make choices
That allows all your passions to stay
.... an adaption of a Uriah Heep song..... no plagiarism intended and no claim to talent by me.
1.5k · May 2022
Recyclable Waste
Tony Tweedy May 2022
A flash of light upon the sky
and dinosaurs were gone.
In a universe that knew them not,
and held no memory to live on.

Of ourselves our human kind,
we think the universe holds us dear.
Through time and vastness of it all
so doubtful it knows we're here.

So many things come and gone
forever changing it still evolves.
Too short is our human existence
to see how all of this resolves.

We think our kind important
a central purpose for it all.
But the universal scale of things
serves to remind our place is small.

We will never know its purpose,
and may never know if there was plan.
But rest assured my fellow humans,
our path will be as the dinosaurs
when the universe recycles man.
1.4k · Sep 2021
Echoes
Tony Tweedy Sep 2021
A God all alone in empty total dark,
had thought to start up creations spark.
To build upon that black empty view,
all those things his thoughts made anew.

Where and with what should he begin,
with only darkness there to keep it in?
Mechanics drawn from rigid Physics laws,
so time would carry out evolutions chores.

Only God alone right there at the start,
hydrogen made as if from some godly ****.
Clouds that swirled and time then congealed,
until mass and gravity his plan then revealed.

Ignition of that first ball of gaseous light,
that brought an ending to the longest night.
Deep in that furnace new things were made,
a realm where matter and time both played.

Changing substance and the shape and form,
by the passing of time and by cosmic storm.
All elements to make every building block,
of galaxies, liquids, gases and every kind of rock.

So the plan moves on at his chosen godly pace,
filling all of time and all corners of outer-space.
Ever changing all things into something more,
God all alone knowing what its all been for.
Accident or creation?.... or both?
1.4k · Mar 2019
Despair... An Advanced Guide
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
By cold logic you arrive,
not through panic nor insanity,
for they are something separate.

You recall those who witnessed,
through blinded eye the beginnings.
Those seemingly oblivious of your falling to this place,
and who could offer no sanctuary or escape.

In your mind the inaction testifies, of a value you no longer hold.
Not just in your place of open eyed awareness,
But also in their world of illusion,
where you no longer belong.

There are two pathways ahead.
But only one will each choose according to their need.
Emotional pain made into the physical
Or the ending of pain both felt and caused, both past and future.

At the beginning and in the intermediate,
the times when cries for help prevailed.
Not consciously shouted but through changes,
altered interaction with the world as it once was.

To those who bore witness to beginning and middle,
at this stage comes the "why?".
"I saw it"...."Why did I not see this outcome?".... "I knew",???

To those who have not been here,
There seems to be no logic,
They cannot see from where they stand the simple rationale.
So contrary and beyond sight
that only the tag of insanity gives explanation.

At the beginners guide just so the numbers who sought to read.
At the intermediate a lesser number could give an interest.
The despair of others an unwanted knowledge and the readings so reflect a reality best kept unvoiced... too disturbing to the ear.
And fewer now here... dear reader... eyes uneducated still asking why.... you few are too late to understanding and by now despair has been defeated.
There are words I would have used but the site censors them for those who are not members.
The sad truth is that only those here through three "guides" will make any sense of my writings.
1.4k · Apr 2022
Prisoner
Tony Tweedy Apr 2022
If there were but some other place,
a place where shadows do not grow,
I would go to be there in that space,
where happier things I just might know.

Away from fear and hurt and pain,
and so many lonely, empty days.
Perhaps to see the sun's light again,
to feel a joy while my spirit plays.

If only just once more a time to see,
not how things are in my everyday,
but rather how things were meant to be,
before things decayed and went away.

Trapped in this unlit shadowed place,
of the loneliest and very darkest kind.
Forever lost am I, lost without a trace,
A prisoner of my own overactive mind.

There is no other place that I can go.
No other place to see...
there is no other place, I will ever know.
there's only me....
1.3k · Apr 2022
Shroud
Tony Tweedy Apr 2022
Again before an emptiness of soul, where all is fears.
Awake but mind devoid of light or any new ideas.
Crushing feeling of loneliness permeates the very air.
Every action taken or ignored devoid of simple care.

How did I become this decayed and empty thing?
Thinking daily upon miseries, so often days before did bring.
Distant, faded memory of the moments that made a smile.
So fleetingly they went to allow despair room all this while.

Worth? A sense of purpose long deserted, gone and fled.
Only a loathing and a pointlessness is left to fill my head.
Long days before today and for others still yet to come,
Without reason to be, certain only eventually I will succumb.

Like coats of paint upon a wall each day another layer smears.
No smiles, no joy, no hope just a face soddened by my tears.
Ever present darkness, shrouds of dark veils upon me, drape.
Calling increasing loudly that there is only one true escape.
Dark days seemingly endless
1.3k · Mar 2019
Killing Time - appendix A
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
Just a few more comments to an earlier post of rhyme.
Where I touched upon how I am seeing different rates of time.
Seems a man named Einstein discovered long ago.
That there was a different perception of seeing time in flow.
He says that if you are moving toward me I will see you shades of blue.
And while you move toward me you are that colour until you pass through.
Those who have been and gone will turn to shades of red.
No I swear that I am serious, it is what Einstein has said.
So I have my answer as to why time moves slow for me.
You are all in motion and I'm stuck where I used to be.
I think I already knew this and suspected it as truth.
But I never expected Albert Einstein would be my proof.
1.3k · Jul 2022
Signs and Portents
Tony Tweedy Jul 2022
Lately I have had a feeling of a sense of deep foreboding in the air,
every time I stop to pause, to think, I can feel it just lurking there.

An all pervasive feeling that all things are not as they should be,
and I get an anxious sensation that it's effects are not just on me.

Colours of nature seem all faded and the air seems different too,
the sky is somehow much more ominous and appears a paler blue.

Even the birds I see upon their wing seem more skittish everyday,
and I wonder if they feel it too, does a dark fear halt their play?

I sense a tension in the natural order of these once normal things,
and my heart and mind are fearful of what message this all brings.

Like some silent siren wailing or invisible flashing hazard light,
my mind is filled with deepest dread and senses things aren't right.

Far too much time caught up thinking upon the portents that I see,
with each terrifying thought I pray for all, to hope that its just me.
I really feel this.... things just don't feel right.
I fear it.... mankind or climate.... one or the other.
Tony Tweedy Apr 2019
One Turbot says to the other "do you believe in Cod?"
The other replies " I think we each know a Sole". "I believe one day when the chips are down and we are at our most battered we will each know a Plaice and we are destined to fillet".
They exchanged a glance and swam away.... just for the Halibut.

I hope my Whiting doesn't offend. Remember believers.... believe in Cod and one day you will be Prawn again.
edited 12th April 2019
1.3k · Aug 2021
Forge
Tony Tweedy Aug 2021
Forged by one's own hand so sharp a blade.
Cast by the universes strongest powers.
A forge so intense in heat and fire.
Bonds as strong as any smithed steel.
No artery immune to it's strikes and piercings.
Vulnerability at it's every mortal ******.
Yet still we choose to love.
To risk to live.... to love.
1.3k · Oct 2021
Destinations
Tony Tweedy Oct 2021
Twenty one thousand, nine hundred and fifteen days,
the sum of all my experience, all memory and dream.
Days of smiles and of laughter, scattered as they came,
interspersed with pain so deep my soul still hears the scream.

Accumulated time filled with things of the important everyday,
Through shifting hands of time all things came then hurried on.
By heart or minds good reasons were the choices that I made,
until now where no good remains and all sense of hope is gone.

My mind will sometimes force a replay of some echo of the past,
when hope and love gave purpose to a young man's dreams.
Twenty one thousand nine hundred and sixteen days,
more recent but so much later,
with a soul deafened to all but screams.
Somewhere.... someone.... must know the point of it all.
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
I have spoken with young men,
who were forced to up and run.
Seen the wounds they carry,
from the barrel of someones gun.

I have Spoken with women,
women with tears in eyes that burn.
As they relate what was done,
because they wanted just to learn.

Ive seen teenage girls running,
in fear for their own lives.
Because someone has told them,
they must become someones wives.

I sat with the old men,
whose spirit would not yield.
And heard how rains of bombs,
were dropped upon their field.

I have heard the many stories,
of families torn apart.
Heard of those still missing,
and the pain in fragmented heart.

I've heard of persecutions,
because of the differing of views.
The scores of people disappeared,
without even making evening news.

I met with many others,
and watched and heard them pray.
Running in fear because for them,
it means death to live your life as gay.

I have talked with the children,
all facing life alone.
Parents not seen,
since the houses all got blown.

These most horrible of all things,
most of you will never see.
But someone needs to tell you
these are the lives lived for many a refugee.
So many stories.... be thankful of where you are born or live... I am.
This poem could have gone for pages more. I spoke with hundreds of asylum seekers over 13 years. edited 17th March 2019
1.2k · Oct 2023
The Tune of The Lonely Night
Tony Tweedy Oct 2023
I write these words today
in hope that you might find a way
to know what is carved
into my heart.

I've searched for you
my whole life through
in every town or place,
I've been.

I know somewhere you must be there,
a belief my heart and mind both share
and they've reserved,
a place for you.

Though I often dream of you,
dreaming is all that I can do
so I just carry on,
along my lonely way.

Please hear my pleading heart
so that we may start,
to make all those dreams
come true.

With this hearts lament,
I must be content,
to hope, that you
might love me too.

For wherever you are,
no matter near or far,
this lament is sung...
just for you.
Footnote: There is a tune to this.... it is intended as a lyric....
1.2k · Oct 2023
Roads, Veils and Doorways
Tony Tweedy Oct 2023
Oh the things that my eyes have seen,
the many places walked I have been.

Upon peak and trough did I roam,
rarely knowing a place called home.

So many turnings along my way,
passing on through to seldom stay.

Staying as long as life allowed,
more times alone than in a crowd.

Beautiful faces that came and went,
both good and evil sometimes sent.

With words sometime of the softest kind,
echoing shrill calls yet within my mind.

Words once soft now turned to stone,
where faces vanish until left alone.

Upon road so full of twist and turn,
until a heart can no longer yearn.

Corners met that were never turned,
unseen paths that were never learned.

Future's short path left to travel on,
in time memory fades and it too is gone.

Things I was and all that I saw,
gone forever through the closing door.

How long then be there just a trace,
that my soul and I ever saw this place.

To dust and particles we all will decay,
those once met too will just fade away.

Until even memories of all are no more,
of a life full lived that no one even saw.
The stream of life and human existence.... a species long journey along an unknown road. Was there a beginning? Is there an end?
1.2k · Mar 2019
Foundation
Tony Tweedy Mar 2019
Life is sure to cost you whilst on the path you choose.
And there will be heartache from things that you will lose.
A greater pain you may encounter, at a far greater cost,
is to no longer see a value in things that once you lost.
You can lose trust in many ways for many things. It can shake foundation and pillar as destructively as any earthquake.
Not entirely happy with the last line..... of or in??
1.2k · Dec 2020
Freezing
Tony Tweedy Dec 2020
How can I feel the extreme pain of loss and deepest dark despair,
from something that reality affirms was never mutually there?

I loved you and my heart stands witness to every lie you told,
yet it is I who loved for real that is left to feel the frigid cold.

You made me feel both my very best and my very worst,
leaving my mind torn by memory that is both loved and cursed?
Only those you give you heart to can make you feel like this.... how does a mind reconcile both the happiness and sadness of such emotions? The lies still hurt.
1.2k · Jan 2021
I Have a Sore Nose
Tony Tweedy Jan 2021
Have you ever sat until some part has gotten really numb?
It happened to me yesterday to the left cheek of my ***.

At first I didn't notice until I tried to up and stand.
What should have been so simple didn't go exactly as I planned.

Initially I rose ***** without any feelings of being sore.
But that changed quite abruptly as my nose impacted the floor.

I don't think I was down too long as the hurt still felt quite new.
Initial pain was somewhat lesser from the grogginess as I came to.

The doctor says it isn't broken and the redness will fade away.
I hope it is so tomorrow as it isn't feeling any better so far today.

For those there to witness much laughter was enjoyed by some,
as I crawled into the ambulance to avoid walking with half a ***.
Another one of those moments.... better out than in.... sorry
1.2k · Dec 2020
Mortal Wounds
Tony Tweedy Dec 2020
I remember how it felt and every dark and angry pain,
the feeling of tender soreness from every ache and throbbing sprain.

I remember ruptured internals and the fire of an appendix burst,
and the excruciating agony at every touch that was loudly cursed.

I remember the touch of many physical pains that left me feeling sore,
But nothing hurts so much as that last time you left my door.
Some wounds just refuse to heal and some pain never abates.
1.1k · Aug 2021
Let There Be Light
Tony Tweedy Aug 2021
Why from singularity to universe
across fourteen billion years?
Then give me just but these sixty
in the company of countless tears?

Why is it I am here to witness,
the wonder of universal things?
Only to know I will never know,
what cosmic evolution finally brings?

Why am I born to a species,
that seeks to know all it can?
But then given such small a window,
I can never hope to see all it's plan?

Why evolve a sentient intelligence,
that looks far beyond Earth's ground?
To give each only such a short lifespan,
where all the answers can't be found?

Why congeal my eternal dust this way,
and then evolve me to conscious thought?
Where universe and evolution continues on,
my consciousness given time oh so short?

Why since the creation of all things,
has evolution had need of so many years?
Without simple insights and more answers,
to give rise of hope for a life of fewer tears?

Why the bindings of science and physics,
that dictate all that comes and goes?
Where time and space and matter,
are given restriction and order to their flows?

Why give me the power to think and question,
in this section of space and time oh so small?
Where rational thought must finally conclude,
humankind has no significance in the plan at all.
I hate unanswered questions.
1.1k · Jul 2021
Searchlight
Tony Tweedy Jul 2021
Another day of cloud and shadow,
has come to take up the stage.
Another sense of empty loneliness,
that so often fills my published page.

That feeling that there is no point,
no rhyme or reason to what I do.
Another day devoid of sunshine,
where dark shadow taints the view.

An ever present feeling of endings,
that assuredly a soul attests are near.
Desolation's discomfort behind my eyes,
seemingly compelled to fill with tear.

Mind now drawn from dreamless sleep,
to wakeful hours as empty as those dreams.
An empty world of loneliness and silence,
where thoughts become nightmare's screams.

Slow moving hands that count away the time,
days filled with shadow immune to every light.
Empty total vacuum unaffected by the hour,
despair, minds refuge in black deep as the night.

Somewhere in this world where darkness reigns,
all dream and hope took turn and lost its way.
So I close again my eyes to drift in dreamless sleep.
to hope that hope returns again some day.
I long for days when the shadows are of natures making.
It is difficult to convey the difference of shadows of the mind to those who walk in lighter spaces. Light has become a distant memory.
Tony Tweedy Dec 2021
I reflect upon the season and memory of Christmas' past,
and I cant help but to wonder if this may be my last.

A thought not born of this season and its promises of joy,
but rather from the pained reflection I am no more a boy.

I think upon friends and family at distance from my day,
who I love so very dearly though they be so far away.

I find this season lonely, with a sadness now become its gift,
yearly every passing nearer to loathing has been my shift.

At an age now to be more a cynic than an optimistic man,
seeing only greed and commerce and not some godly plan.

A Christmas of my childhood, of love, good will and of care,
forever wish I for you all,
never knowing sadness and loneliness' despair.
Mixed feelings season again.... 60 down.... god knows how many more.
1.1k · Jul 2020
The Futures Market
Tony Tweedy Jul 2020
Far across the water sits a little Chinese man,
who has his own ideas of life's most desired plan.

On the other side of the ocean is yet another guy,
whose plan doesn't agree with a Chinese minds eye.

Petty is their game but they just don't see it so,
and so they push each other in a destructive to and fro'.

Two school boys being bullies is the policy that they choose,
Both belligerent and stubborn, both determined not to lose.

Surely they must see that the other guy wont ever give in.
Preferring total destruction over allowing the other guy to "win".

They cant see that neither side will ever accept to give,
Both intent to destroy it all than allow us all to live.

All can see it coming but no one dares make a sound,
until the mark of mankind's passing is just craters in the ground.
Xi Jinping... Donald Trump... for **** sake... grown up. The world is reliant on you guys being sane and sensible. You must know there is only one place the road you are currently following leads. Losing for everyone isn't the right course. Reach out a hand and change the future.
1.1k · Oct 2021
Resting Place
Tony Tweedy Oct 2021
Cast my ash upon the rocks and let them settle upon the sea,
for there upon that rocky shore is the place I choose to be.

Peace and tranquil summer days that I spent without a care,
where sound of wave and salted scents be carried by the air.

Weary are my bones with a soul of torments without release,
but on that shore my soul can rest and finally know some peace.

The lap of wave upon the rocks under the clearest blue of sky,
In the warmth of childhood memory my soul could finally lie.

The choke and mew of seagulls as they pass along their way,
solitary songs of disturbance to accompany the passing of a day.

For I am come to such an age to hear the appeal in this call,
to know both rest and peace and with no fear in it at all.
Sometimes you can be too weary of things
1.1k · Aug 2022
Closer Each Day
Tony Tweedy Aug 2022
How many days could I count that I have left to me?
Would I dare to count, knowing that finite they must be?

I know that there are far fewer than when it all began.
None the wiser am I, as to whether it was to some plan.

I find I have come to ponder the complex and the small.
To wonder if there be a purpose or just no point at all?

Why be given to the thoughts and give time to such things?
Looking for answers but deepest thoughts no answer brings.

Why give the imagining to some ethereal immortal goal,
and wrap it up so fragile in such a flimsy mortal soul?

Were there ever choices that I made as I took life's risk?
Or was it all pre-recorded on some universal Blu-ray disc?

I know the day's sun is setting, another day so newly passed,
Mortal mind taunts me, in the tally, will tomorrow be my last?
Why do we even harbour thoughts of immortality?
1.0k · Jan 2021
Hilltop Hoods (2nd edit)
Tony Tweedy Jan 2021
Over countless months by design,
a great firework he did make,
Constructed from lies and deceits,
and by turning all truths to fake.

Honest men of morals that believe,
that truth by righteousness will always win out,
By established rules and ethic as tools,
seek to quell the falsehoods shout.

They believe the pyrotechnician,
a fool of doubtful mind.
For they cannot see the plan he holds,
hidden by deceit of such evils kind.

Divided is the great citadel,
where once truth had walked without fear or care,
To become the protected sanctuary,
to the lies that now thrive in there.

He buys the time for his plan,
that has not altered not one bit.
While good men go on as before,
thinking they have hold of it.

All of this by his design,
since from too many days ago.
He has cast you all as characters,
in this his fatal show.

When martial law is imposed,
by the power you afford him still.
Remember that you had the chance to choose,
for truth's flag to fly steady upon the hill.
I hope for the worlds sake that I am wrong.
Written on the 14th of January after claims he doesn't support violence.... another lie.
1.0k · Jun 2021
Clouds
Tony Tweedy Jun 2021
I lie upon the soft field grasses,
and look up upon the blue.
To ease the mind to rest,
and let my eyes take in the view.

Vapour shaped by wind,
that drifts high upon the restful scene.
To float upon the pastel,
leaving no trace where it has been.

Shapes of white and grey,
like soft pillows in the air.
That by some subtle contortion,
transform, 'til naught is there.

Others drift across the daylight,
as if on some predestined course.
propelled across the sky,
by a breath of nature's unseen force.

I wonder where they go,
what bidding do they do.
As they glide along their way,
until far beyond my capsuled view.

Sun's warmth in temporary instalments,
as shadows come and go.
The shade and shadow's fall,
slightly cool all that is far below.

Through my eyes now closed,
of soft patterns I remain complete aware.
As warmth and slight chill mark the clouds,
that march upon the springtime air.
1000 · Jun 2019
Void
Tony Tweedy Jun 2019
If I give you one more chance to lie to me,
would you tell me you love me one last time,
maybe then I could lie to me too,
and have something to believe and dream once more?
Do you hold those memories?.... regrets?
What hurts more?... the lies or the loss of what you thought you had?
972 · Oct 2021
Reversing
Tony Tweedy Oct 2021
What choices would I change if I started from anew?
What lessons from my life to change to see another view?

Would I make the same mistakes or choose another way?
Would I speak out just as loud at the times I had my say?

How would I react to the things I've seen men do?
Could I hope to be braver and help those it was done to?

Would I choose to stand when I saw the need to fight?
Would I still see the same things I do now as being right?

Would I still choose to hurt those I caused pain to?
Knowing that the choice once made is impossible to undo.

I know I cannot go back and do it all over from the start,
but if I did it all again, I would live it with a bigger heart.
Some lessons have to be learned.... life makes us who we are and who we become. Our epitaph is always written by those who survived the choices we made.
955 · Jan 2022
A Song of Hope
Tony Tweedy Jan 2022
If you could but hold me I would love you.
I would adore every little thing that you do.
My skies would forever appear much brighter.
If only you will pretend that you love me too.
If you could but kiss me I would love you.
I would gift you all finery golden and new.
My lonely world could be much less empty.
Please say you can pretend you will love me too.
How a heart can bleed....
936 · Dec 2021
Life
Tony Tweedy Dec 2021
Today's that fill with memory of yesterday,
So many days of happiness and of sorrow.
And yet we wake each morn to dream,
That there may be better days tomorrow.
The every day experience
925 · Jul 2022
The Big O...h no
Tony Tweedy Jul 2022
Harmonies and melodies that accompanied my drift,
nursing wounded soul and often giving it a lift.
Moments when cords and rhythm took me the next mile,
so many old chorus' that could make my heart smile.

Songs and tunes that touched the moments I've seen,
to connect forever to people and places I've been.
Soundtrack to my life to record memories in rhyme,
taking me back as if I were some traveler in time.

At some lonely hour when an old track comes to mind,
stresses and troubles for a time gone and left behind.
Teleported by some in the moment pertinent track,
where a mind can find escape and be taken right back.

The music of who I am, of my soul that shaped my life,
at every joyous moment and every tumultuous next strife.
I play those old tunes and I sing so badly right along,
I can't help but  to do so, as its my life and hearts song.
Music..... what a gift to the soul.
920 · Jun 2019
A Heart Shapped Shadow
Tony Tweedy Jun 2019
Different shades of light that have passed before my eyes.
Casting shadow and obscuring things and covering up the lies.
How to see the good in things when light keeps them concealed.
To hope that light might shine and falsehood and fake be revealed.

How very hard it has become to see the light as good.
So many years younger was I, when to see it so I could.
I thought that I had lost the light and darkness had prevailed.
The simple truth is it was by light and shadow that I was assailed.

It has been the light that has often broached through my defense.
Open to love, light shone in and seemed to make some sense.
My eyes were in awe of light and my heart overcome with joy.
Only to find that light is used in lies and deceits own employ.

I no longer can trust the light or give it even some small chance.
No more hurt to my heart from light disguised as loves romance.
I cant escape a world where light by all is worshiped for it's glow.
So I'll live a life that is empty in this light I have come to know.
Too afraid to love again... some hurts just cant be faced again.
903 · Apr 2020
Random Thought #8
Tony Tweedy Apr 2020
How many ventilators can you buy for the price of an Aircraft Carrier?
You just can never have enough aircraft carriers.... or tanks or planes...
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