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don't lament her death,

she knew that darkness lied ahead
the ground beneath a liar's feet,

is always littered with ****
your blood is on your hands,

even though i wield the knife
if i am part of the storm,

there will be no calm
amber sky so
littered with wings

i find muse
as
beauty avenges the abyss of despair
raw emotion
is not something
i display
very often

raw emotion
is something
all
saved for you
i want to
wrap your
body up
in yellow
caution tape

because,

your
body is
a crime scene
I watch as a lifeless limb drifts down the river of life.
I watch as a storm cloud races across an otherwise empty sky of blue.
I watch these things , I watch....
I always watch these things.

I watch a brilliant flame extinguished and waft away a wisp of smoke.
I watch as a leaf falls from it's tree never to be one again.
I watch these things , I watch....
I always watch these things.

I watch the sun fall beneath the horizon as darkness takes up residence.
I watch the moon but just one half, the other half playfully hides.
I watch these things , I watch....
I always watch these things.

I watch the bird out on the wire and marvel at this balance.
I watch as stars fight to outshine one another in a moonlit sky.
I watch these things , I watch....
I always watch these things.

I watch the evil get rewarded and carry on unscathed.
I watch the good fight epic battles just to live another day.
I watch these things , I watch....
I always watch these things.




written by me... ..
fragile are the soft moist lips of your lover

but;
even more fragile,

are the words that fall from them
50+
50+
I've nothing left to prove.

My ego
and manhood
has been comfortably
watching Hallmark movies
with my wife
for years.

Boosting your ego
is a senseless
waste of energy.

Don't self subscribe.

Allow others to
subscribe to you.

In my field of 36 years of heavy highway construction?

Your ego
would wilt in the summer sun
along with you.

Again,
I have nothing left to prove to anyone in this life.

My 50+ year old ego needs no stroking.

It's called security.
It's called confidence.

And a confident man I am.
The river
shimmering
before me
like billions
of unclaimed
diamonds.
A bountiful array of birds and
their morning
serenade.
Rain drops
cascading down
luscious leaf
after leaf
forming puddles
beneath
my feet.
The grey
skies don't seem
so grey with
all of this
green picture
framing it.
A boat sails
by and
disturbs the
glass top
water's surface.
The older man
just arrived
once again
with his young
prancy pup
driving from
garbage can
to garbage can
collecting
bottles.
With the rain,
I just called
my entire crew
and told them
to enjoy a
3 day weekend.
I can't pour
concrete in the rain but,
I can sure
sit at my
favorite spot
in this life
and write
with
no worries.




written by me... ..
Life's death
is
death's life.



written by me... ..
6am
6am
Rain on
Monday.
6am
will find me
at my
favorite spot
by the water.
In search
of a muse and
and
writing verse.
Rain for me,
smells like
freedom.
I live for
writing verse
by the freedom of the river
in a 6am rain.


written by me... ..
what are you running from?

inevitability?
cowards run
A pine tarred bat,  
that greets a frayed and soiled baseball.
Grass stained shortstop,
he leaps to pilfer your grin.
Anticipation from a crowd,
chants of lets go home team,
that echo through the sultry summer eve.
Bottom of the ninth, two outs and one run down,
it's now up to you to battle...........
to win.
partnership
is just another word for
failure
Back in
the day,
the 70's
and 80's
on the
west side
of Buffalo
at Nativity
Playground,
we young men
and women
were all
friends.

We all
tightly
hung out
together!
Some,
were much
more than
'friends'.

One SOBER
summer
night,
I was introduced
to Carrie
by the girlfriend
of my good
friend Wayne.

I wasn't
interesed....

at first.

I was sober!

Anyway;

She wasn't
ugly understand
but rather,
she just wasn't
my type...
well,
on that night
anyway.

The following night,
Carrie ended up
where I happened to be,
and on this night
I was partying
and getting
drunk.

I remember,
after each drink
went down...
Carrie was
quickly becoming
'my type'.

Folks were
skinny dipping
in the canal
and I began
taking a good
hard look at Carrie by the bonfire.

Before I
knew it,
my pants were unzipped
and in front
of everyone,
my *****
was in
her mouth.

It's then
I stopped her
to save her
a little face
and instructed her
to go up the hill...
and I would follow.

We ended up
on a
concrete pad,
no bigger
than 5 foot
× 6 foot
in the back of
the west side
rowing club
in the spotlight
with Carrie
riding me like
I was a horse
in the
Kentucky derby.

She was good!
Make no mistake,
Carrie was good!

The next
morning
I awoke and...
my underwear
was sticking
to my *** and
I was confused
as to why?

Carrie,
apparently rode
a winner.

I never had
brush burns
on my knees
as bad as the
brush burns
that Carrie
left on my ***
from that
concrete pad.

I dated Carrie
for the
remainder of
the summer
of 83'.

No reason to
wonder why,
right?

That summer
we went on
to christening
brand new
Chrysler Lebaron
Convertibles
of our friend's
parents,
Carrie climaxing
on church steps
with all of
our clothes on
in front of visitors
from Kentucky
and
so much more.

I swear that
song by Europe; 'Carrie'
was sung
about her.


written by me... ..
And Carrie wasn't even my best xxxk.
My best xxxk was graduation night and the following morning and afternoon and her name was Denise.
Denise was a straight up freak like me!
A freak when enough was never enough.
A lot of you folks write about your fantasies where as
I can write about what I have lived and TURNED DOWN too many times to count.
I left my
alcohol at
satan's
doorstep.
A doorstep
I never plan
on
stepping up to
again.
Satan can
keep my
*****.
I simply choose
to no longer
lose.



written by me... ..
If they
don't
like you?

Trust me,
you are
doing something
right.


written by me... ..
The rain,
the sound of it as it cascades off of the window panes,
the metal tingy sound as it meets the gutters.

The grey skies,
the gloomy feel,
the frowns that could be smiles,
if,
if you take a moment to count the shades of grey in the sky.

A smile formed from one that is deaf... ..

if,
if they could only hear what you hear,
the sound of a car swooshing by in the rain.

The melodic sound of a windshield wiper
as it sways to and fro.

The sound of thunder that even scares the unimpaired.

There is serenity and peace to be found in the rain.

While others complain about it,
find misery in it.

I listen and find things most overlook,
take for granted.

An unforgettable intimate kiss in the rain---

I like to walk in tall wet grass,
barefoot while it rains,
damp heavy sticky clothes...

--- I smile
and stare up at the grey sky.

... ..

Then there was blue-----
Another day vacating my bed with a sigh.
I stand up annoyingly and question myself why.
Is it because fame and fortune are my destiny today?
Nah, it's a laborious routine, I strive to find some other way.
It's now evolved into a chore and chores are no fun.
An everyday beating from the merciless sun.
By 3 pm , tired, spent and drenched in sweat.
36 years my body now regrets.
July, August, I can't wait till Fall.
November , December to see the first snowflake and thankfully end it all.
As we await the arrival of our concrete truck,
jovial, trivial, almost painful small talk is being made.

But then we hear and can visually see our concrete
truck largely coming down the road.

The uncomfortable, insignificant chatter has ceased.

A more serious tone has overcome the crew.
I point to my bottom (my ****) to signal to the driver that I want him to back in.

Truck has been backed in..

  
Now the driver steps from his cab with the loud roar of the mixer mixing, almost similar to the sound of a jet preparing to take off.

The driver asks, "how many chutes" ?
I reply, "all of them please, and then lets look at your slump".

My crew now begin an almost involuntary impatient pacing.

Its what we do when concrete arrives.

Some light cigarettes.

Some tap their floats or brick trowels on steel pins to clean them.
Some like me begin to stretch.

As I see the concrete come out of the back of the mixer I say to the driver " 9 gallons of water please ".

As the mixer mixes the pacing almost becomes an annoyance but has to be done to expend the nervous energy.

The driver now back in the cab of his truck,
I say to him "okay, back her up".

We begin our pour.

The concrete slides down its 4 chutes.
I say to my crew "pull up that wire mesh,
raise that expansion joint,
knock that concrete down, please".

The crew,
although friends always talk about me,
the foreman,
its part of concrete life.

They utter to each other "why is he dumping so fast,
why is he dumping so high" ?

"I'll make him shovel this concrete back if he keeps dumping this way".

Mind you, they all think they know more than you apparently,
but they don't have,
want,
nor can they do
your job.

Organized,
respected,
money making foreman
do not grow on trees.
They are unique and
hard to find.

Half way done with our pour I gesture to the driver in a drinking motion ,
"more water please driver, 4 more gallons please".

The mixer roars once again.

My crew catches their breath during this final chance of doing so.

I say to the driver, "okay, lets go, pull up and begin discharging".

We finally get to the end of our pour.

Sweat pouring off of every brow...
every chin.

T-shirts saturated in sweat, we gather ourselves to now provide the finish product, "the finishing process".

After the finishing is done we all stand in the street at the foot of the driveway and commend one another on a job well done.

I say "looks good men , a job well done" !

That uncomfortable trivial painful chatter begins once again till we depart for home.

Till tomorrow when we do it all ,
all over again but only this time with a new ...story for
annoying chatter,
a few more aches and pains....
a few pounds lighter....
and a few more blisters and callouses.



written by yours and everyone's "concrete poet"
The cancer
is beginning
to hurt.
Breath is
noticeably
shorter.
Fatigue
sets in
much more
quickly.
A cough
that
persists.
An internal chest
and sternum
that itches
and burns.
The right
lung back pain
that
becomes
more sharp
each day.
Oh well,
I guess.
We are all
going to die
some day.
Death,
I fear not.
Death was
conquered
by Jesus.
Death
is Eternal life
that I can't
wait
to 'live'.
Cancer
scares me not.



written by me... ..
She loved
tasting me
with her
eyes.
Because
her body,
was never
meant to
be mine.
Even though,
our attraction
was
pure
animalistic
debauchery.



written by me... ..
We as humans will never understand just how insignificant that we are in the grand scheme of life.

We are nothing more than murderers, pillagers and cowards here!

And as each generation comes and goes,
they only embarrass the human race ever further.

Think about this.

Why are we the only species/organisms that doesn't seem to be evolving anymore?

Cancer OWNS this species!!
Absolutely kicks our ***** and OWNS us!!

In saying that,
I can tell you this,  we aren't the most intelligent species/organisms that resides on this earth!

In our narcissistic minds, we only THINK that we are.
Loss.
Loss is not some figment of our imaginations.

Loss is waking up every morning and feeling that there is something very important that is missing.

In the pit of your stomach.
In the deepest recesses of your heart.

At the forefront of your mind.
Loss is an extreme emotion.

Because loss, is something that you know that you can never get back again.

Loss can leave you lost and nomadicly meandering unfamiliar paths most days and nights.

But,
but in those moments that the sun still shines,
shine....
shine brighter than it!

Make those around you always reach for their sunglasses.

The grey skies will always be there and during those, let those that we have lost, rain down on us so that for those moments, we may hide our tears.

Loss, is an emotion more extreme and intense than love.

Because, all that's left is to relive all of the memories of love without a further touch, but to look up into Heaven when we do and smile above.
it's natural,
right?

doesn't it have to be?

an infant child has an agenda

when they cry to be picked up
and nestled in their parents arms

they cry because they know that they will
be picked up

that's agenda

i write this short piece about agenda
because,

i anticipated that it may have caught the
eye of a few more readers

that's agenda

we all have an agenda
My hands

My shoulders

My elbows

My back

My knees

My feet

My legs... ..

None of these
work the way
that they
once did
36 years ago,
before I left
the world of
Advertising and
Sales Promotion
as a youth and
began doing
concrete

As the proud
Dad of
6 adult children,
I don't regret
any of
the aches,
the pains,
the swelling,
and
body parts
that just don't
work sometimes
the way that
they were
meant to

I am a Dad

I am a provider

Providing a
decent life
for my family
on one
paycheck with
help from
no one

I take and
took being
A Dad
very seriously

Sure, my body hurts
because of
my tenacity and my passion
to earn everything
that has ever
come my way
but,

it was all
worth it
and I would
do it all over again

Now,

now I have
been blessed with
taking being a
'Papa'/Grandpa
seriously
× 3

Until my body
shuts me down
and I can
continue to
conquer the pain,

I will continue
to provide as
only a Dad and Papa can



written by me... ..
I try
to
give a
piece
of me

When I
share
with
you all
my poetry

One day
while standing outside
a
funeral home

Smoking cigarettes
and
as icy
as
Alaska, Nome.

You'll recall
a scribble
of mine
that
reached you

And...

Everyday
after -
looking for
DMF Sr's
scribble
for the day,
eh...one
or two.

But
my page
will be
hushed,
the activity
on it
now dead

At least
enjoy
my book
while
cozied up
in
your bed.

Just know
and
remember -

My pen
will never
dry

Even when
I'm writing
my poetry
from
up high
in the sky.



written by me... ..
as i gaze up high

i observe a forever ashen cloudy sky

begrudgingly one boot,
then the other

my genuine thirst for the day is solitude and cover

away, the place where people i push

tormented broken hearted mind of mush

"dear john" is not for me

even though this landscape is not where i want to be

dispatch the clouds

a lunar or solar moment my eyes will never see

set my mind and soul eternally free

basking in longevity under the canopy

the canopy of your shaded tree
Destruction lies around like broken shards of glass that flatten your tire and direct you to a tree.
The bird with an injured wing awaits its inevitability on a 8 lane highway.
I hear the vigorous shaking of the ball bearings in a spray paint can before it explodes.
The motorcyclist at a red light with feet rested on the ground gets plowed into from behind by a drunk off duty sheriff.
Life is so fragile.
So many nights lying awake in bed, in my home but I am not even there.

I am always someplace else by myself, away from life's realities.

Respecting the quiet moments and writing down the thoughts inside my head.

That's happiness,
that's contentness for me.

No need for millions of dollars.
No need for unnecessary status symbol cars.
No need for a mansion to lay my head and call home.

What would be greater is if I could be who I am.

All I want from life is peace and quiet.
Alone time.
I adore being alone.
It's the only time I can be me.

Just give me my mind and a writing instrument.
That's when I am always perfectly fine.

I'm a hard working, very simple unmaterialistic man that appreciates simple things like peace and quiet and alone time.

Give me those two things and you can keep everything else.
The only person that can make you happy is you.

I've known that my entire life.
So, I don't like when I ignore myself.

Tick tock tick tock tick tock and then guess what?

It's all over.

Either wantingly or unwillingly, it ends.

Now you see it, now you don't.

It's like whack a mole.
One day you pop up out of bed and the next you don't.

Every choice that you make in this life is like russian roulette.

Your next choice could be your last.

So at least, choose to be you whether others like you or not.
Afford others the opportunity to remember you for whom you really are, good or bad.

I do this with my writing.
If I acted it out?
I'm a multi century dormant volcano.
I'm a vigorously shaken soda so,
let's just not go there.


So now anyway, it's time to rise up out of bed and go out into this strange world filled with strange people and be filled with anxiety and unhappiness.
[And yeah, I know that you think that I am the strange one and that's okay]

It is time to go mingle with others that do not understand you,
and strangers that you do not trust, even a little.

And let me tell you, wearing a half assed grin is quite tiresome and exhausting around others.

But alas, I'll just go through the motions until I get back home where I can happily be me once again.
Like moon drenched waves that crash together as one at sea

Our depth and longing to unite is fresh as paradise's breeze

We knock upon each others heart like sands on the shoreline

Please don't drift away with the next moment's tide

Paradise only exists when your lips are pressed against mine

My lonely nights have only ever needed you

I only want to share my thoughts, my dreams with you it's true

Almost paradise is dreams that somehow don't belong to me

Almost paradise is your body only given to me in a one night fantasy

Paradise is when I the sun, and you the horizon come together and forever form we
i feel her emerald eyes upon me

-or are they?

is it just my hope or the wish that i wait to come true?

if it came true;

what would be my very first words,
my very first move on her?

i know that i would ask her to kindly ignore my tremblin' hands that have waited what seems a lifetime to hold her firmly in my grasp.

because;
her body fits within my firm grip perfectly,

sinfully perfectly.

our lips locked together like a safe that holds millions of dollars in rare jewels.

the contour of our bodies melting into one another
like dark chocolate onto a luscious strawberry

like the finale at a 4th of july fireworks display... ..

i finally enter her
and boom...
much like my story

36 years of concrete completed and
i have 4 years until retirement from the union hall

but,
the fighting of pain here,
there and everywhere may have me abruptly decide to retire, prior to the completion of those 4 years

just like Luck,
the passion is just about gone because of the everyday fight with pain

i feel for the young man

i know exactly where he is coming from

but in the end,
he made the LITERAL choice of walking away while he can still, "walk away"

a decision that i, myself,
fight with everyday

good luck
andrew!
Oh sky of grey...
travel on your
eastward way.

The soaring birds
against your canvas ...
they catch my eye.

At lights end,
and twilight
settles in...
another day
I bid goodbye.

My tired body
on my bed I lay.
Dreams of waking for yet ....
another day.

An ode for
tommorow and
the roots that
it may lay.
Tonight I sleep
with hopes that
I will see
another
tomorrow
after, today.
Eyes.

Eyes,
they can
tell us oh
so much if
we dare to
peer deeply
enough.

More than
a
"window to
the soul"
but rather
the meeting
place for
everything
about you
in the universe
to go... ..

and to
grow

into an
unforgettable write
by
Edgar Allen Poe

and a place
where,

me, alas... ..
is filled with
very little
woe.

Behind those
eyes are where
life lives
and where
life dies.

Stare if
you must
because,

behind
my eyes is
an enchantment
of
paradise's
skies.
my body,
my mind,
they are
a palette of
deep tumultuous pain and twisted
wicked pleasure.

a poetic sea
of spontaneity
with
climactic
beginnings and
endings that
women with me;

will measure.

measure you,

and see if your
words are merely
words or if
you too can become a ****** poem in need of
censure.

a poem i am,

that stands tall
through the mist
along side women that ache to be
caressed and
seduced inside
the mist and into a blur.

a poem i am... ..

albeit abstract but,
gets your juices
to stir as you
read
'this poem'
for perhaps... ..

which there may never
be a cure.

once read;

reality steps in
and selfish passion needs to
endure.

with our bodies;

we have written
poems on summer nights in ***
filled sheets and
bottom lips that
drip with sweat.

a poem i am,

that has never failed to make any
woman wet.

fifty two years and none of the five will i
ever regret!

let's write another
poem in tomorrow's
sunset.

a poem i am;

a poem that you,

unlikely... ..

have
ever read or met.
once tasted... .. well
Through my bedroom window,  

the web of barren tree limbs that yawn against the grey sky paint a portrait.

It paints a black and white portrait of strength and loneliness,

that only we poets can see.
"Macabre
is
nothing more
than
maturation"


written by me... ..
And accepting that maturation.

Don't be afraid of me!
You are a rose.

... you are a rose

    unlike Axl.

Your thorns,

   they only stimulate
every man that breathes in
your unique bouquet.

As I insert myself
into your petals
of velvety paradise
I realize that;

you are the color
rose that has
always escaped me
but... ..

no more!
never am i
one to dare and fill the air
with dead unnecessary words

uninteresting words that just fly by
the ears and the hearts of the undeserving -
stoically portrayed.

"i'm sorry" means i'm sorry when meant

don't fill the air with those words
just to say you said them

most often,
those 2 words together ( i'm sorry )
are never felt intensely enough anyway

why you ask?

because the "apologist" -
habitually utilizing them -
has dead eyes -
a generic tongue -
and coldest of hearts.
asea,
tangled web
of complexity

raging rapids
hasten
mortality

albatross
lingers
over me

stiffen bones
death's
rigidity

spare the
beacon's search
for me

alas
my life may
no longer be

battered and
bruised I
was left alee
With wings on your shoulders all dressed in white,
your angelic garb and color, they fit you just right.

In the distance a harp, it plays a heavenly melody,
you close your wings to protect and fully envelop me.

Dancing on the clouds like two foolish men,
laughing and smiling on our stairway to heaven.

I reach for a star, no care if I fall,
you smile at me, now you can have them all.
His face,

Like a scrapbook.

Past years,

Patchwork and visible.

The lines on his face,

Mimic puzzle pieces.

They meld years of pain and ecstasy.

Matured,

Sage strands of grey hair -

Mingle with the onyx.

Hands, so storied and weathered,

Like an old unmaintained brick wall,

Crumbling....yet strong !

Lips...

Capable of speaking words and stories...

Enslaving and captivating my audience.

A patchwork of 50 years I am,

Hardened and yet softened..

Confused yet filled with clarity.

If I were "colored by numbers 1-100 "...

You'd be up to 50.

I'm simply art that has yet to be finished.

A scrapbook that awaits more memories....

A painting that awaits its next hue.

I dare ya to -

Grab a brush.....?
waking up today -
the sun is bright -
yet i see darkness everyday -
with what seems
no hope of ever seeing light

pondering this day and what life has in store -
i push myself hard just to get out of bed -
another day for my tears to hit the floor -
another day alive but really walking dead

sure i smile, sometimes earth size'd -
on the outside i look great -
but with -
people like me... there's something you don't realize -
n the outside i'm great
while on the inside is depression and a bitter debate

assist me in carrying on with words of love and positivity -
don't knock me further down or darken an already onyx day -

fight this war i have, i everyday wage within me, with me -
assist me to breathe on this saturday with the comforting words that you say -
assist me on this day away from my inner torture and help me to be free !
We awaken

  We stretch and scratch

Off to the shower unclothed and naked

     Throwing on socks that don't seem to match

          Drinking our coffee with a slice of white toast

Classical music softly playing in the background

      These are the mornings I've grown to love most

        Some rain and it's serenity....one of my favorite sounds

               Birds foraging the worms and bathing in the puddles

A morning of tranquility, a morning without life's troubles

   Listen for the "swoosh" as the morning traffic drives by

          Sit back and absorb it all as the heavens continue to cry
The lights flickered and then all went midnight.
That's when we lose our names, 'out of sight'.
He, she, they, him, her.
In the daylight.
In the darkness.
In the Winter.
In the Summer.
I want to have a name that falls from your lips.
I may one day lose life's grip.
You may not be with me on this trip.
But please remember my name.
He, they, him is simply not the same.
When death here on earth has claimed another
Can you hear it call
It howls like a hundred wolves
At a full moons sky
It bends trees like rubber bands
It ripples the mighty seas
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