Found you
I wont let go
This dream
Shared by two
You got me
And, I want you to
Get me
As you do.

The only light
In this dark
The only truth
I want to hear.
Early days
But it feels like decades
And I wouldn't change
A thing.

In her
I see
Myself
As me

In me
I see
Her
Eternally

I found her
As she found me
Her beautiful soul
And perspective beauty
She got me
And I wouldn't have it
Any
Other
Way

Sundee
Lazy arv
Everything
In its right place

Make the time
To help future me
Do it now
Later is too late

Keep moving
Organise small futures
Tiny goals
Baby fireworks wins

Pub for dinner
Alone.

Take the time
To get dressed up
To smell delectable
Even though I'm on my own.

Be nice
Smile and listen
Retort in my own way
To incite thought and emotion.

Eat my *******
In the dining room
With families and friends
On my own, table 46.

Cheers, hoo roo.

Take the bins out
Calm the lounge fire
Prep work clothes for tomorrow
Curl up in the silence.

Lazy eve
Sundee.

The storm is calming finally
To a calm exhale breeze
There was times
I had dust
In my eyes
But now
The well is full (both of them)
And, I am
Content and safe.

Lightening, horizon bound
As I've found
This twisted reflection
Smiles back.

The pain is always temporary
You too, will look back
And smile your beautiful smile
The beautiful inside smile you always hide.

As a human, hunting happiness
And finding it,
It is my duty
To hope you find yours.

I believe in you
Good luck.

I saw her, for the first time
On the other side of the glass
Patiently, I sat crossed legged
To feel the first embrace

The touch of her skin
The feel of the kiss on her face
I waited there
Fireworks within

I held her close and tight
Her scent of strawberry and sweets
As she wrapped her arms around me
I felt as I was home and safe

Hometown pains and wonders
Photos of postcodes
The proudest chauffeur
Holding hands at 110

Admitting our faults
Our horrible histories
Our defects and additions
To our now naked bodies

Endless banter, factual and humour
Bouncing off of walls and eachother
Beers and ***** and pizza
We talked as if weve known eachother forever
Falling asleep naked
In the middle of the day
Eggs Benedict and pear cider
Come in, we're awesome

Hot tubs and expensive reds
Fruchocs, dark chocolate with mint
Dressed to the nines
Is where I made her mine

No TV, just music and squeezes
Sensual ******* passions
Climbed trees in the rain
Tested beds in showrooms
Spilled drinks and kicked over *** plants
Sang songs of our playlist
And her kiss
Was that of an angel I once knew

I will not defer
It is all for her
I will cherish this twin flame
Under the same star
No matter how far away we are.

I have never had a memory so pure
So I am sure
That she is mine
And I am hers

X

Just before
We were saying good morning
Sharing meals
Laughing at jokes we made

Just before
We had our own language
Her stories took ages to tell
I still listened

Just before
She held me goodbye
Longer than usual
Marshmallows by fires

Just before
She wrapped her legs
Around mine and smiled
Just passing time

Waiting for Mum
To pick her up.

Nerves rattle
Like an old fridge
Shudder and spasm
**** water from beneathe.

Concentration evades
Yet I am see-through
Crumpled cellophane
In a ****** church window.

You know all of me
Better than I.

All these edges
Cigs, ****, ****, love
I have become
A square.

Every vice
Is crushing my soul.

Tensions build
Erupt on the inside
I crush up my fists
Like paper cups.

Conclusion a distant illusion
Salted with confusion
I asked for well done
Only ever get blue

It must get worse
Before it gets beautiful.

3 kids and a dog
20 years of pleasure and pain
I look up from my hole
Which took 20 years to excavate
Happiness is fleeting
Demons I've been feeding
Have gorged on the pains
A banquet of self hate.

I apologize for the lack of love
For the self isolation
For the dishonesty
And no communication
It doesn't matter now
I can't un-say what I've said
Nor undo what I've done
This love is dead

She allows me to stay
To sleep on the couch
To be a ghost of a man
Still visible
I hunt for a house
A place just to sleep
3 kids and a dog
Just a fading memory.