Numbing feet
Aching fingers
Smelly shirt
Sweat beads on my face
I feel myself dying
I feel myself falling asleep while  standing
I feel everyone is bad
I just cannot stop thinking
Handsome guys
Cold  jelly lemon drink
Support from my co workers
Save me from nearly dying.

Talented people out there
Make this world bright and colourful.
I see people every day
At the alleys,
At the market,
And in my home.
They have always been a part of life.
Their anger,
Agony,
Happiness,
Worry.
Express the world with sincerity.
To me,
People make the world very bright and happy,
To me,
Everyone is talented.

Mount Everest
you are too high for me.
People worship thee like God.
Thee never flinch
Thee never crack when the earth is shook.
Thee never cry
but why peopl cry when they climb on you?
Thee has a strong back like a dinasour but they can't grip on you.
I know you are friends with the wind and the Sun.
I know you are like one of the Greek gods.
But u aren't kind.
I lost my brother
who was so overzealous
you should have let him win!
you killed him with your power!
you should have let him win!
He loves his country so much
He risked his life
so he can prove to everyone.
I wonder why people love you
you are so cold
no wonder ice stays with you
watch out!
i will be coming with an army
and we will be standing
on your head with pride.

My mind is poly
but i'm only.

A life in Silica is promising
Bread and Wine is plenty.
Everyone lives in a square box with four windows.
Men work at mines and markets.
A life in Silica is truly blessing.
Those who know the blessed Silica,
Leave their nests and fly,
In hope to settle down on a new blessed land.
Silica is really new and interesting.
The country is always sparkling
The buildings are so tall that a man broke his neck when he looks up.
Lips pushed out when they speak.
Silica must be really interesting as it said.
I know the Silica
My friends know the Silica
Everyone knows the the Silica
But God sends only a few there.
Everynight we pray fervently
Everyday we listen in awe as we listen to their story.
Everyday we dream that we are also there.
I want my family to have a full meal.
I want my family to live peacefully.
I want my sick father to be recovered
So he can write poems with me.
Once we are in Silica
My family will be fine.
Their future
Will be really promising.

Wow,  i just know what u are
I was blind.
I  was too stubborn to read warning signs on your body.
I regret it so much.
I wish my dear sisters
Are not ignornat like me.

I grow up sad and weak;
Didn't expect to break the expection i had set years ago.
Not only i became like this,
It's heart breaking  to see my loved ones too.


I remember a saying by heart,
Loved ones support you in the hard times.
I fell lower and I cried harder,
When i know i can't run to them anymore.

Days and night pass by
Your smile couldnt switch on my bedroom light.
I gulp down my inner voices;
Burning my throat and body.
I can just say," i like you"
Needing not to beat around the bush.
But it's so hard,
To move my tongue and say it bravely.
My words are not smoke
Dont put out with your cold heart.
On my happy moments,
I wanna share my joy.
On my sad moments
I just want to lie on your chest.
It is just a sick fantasy!
I hurt myself
With these fantasy.
I neglect my family and friends.
I hurt them.

I ......
just wanna continue.
I......
just want to be loved.
It seems it is too much to ask for anything;
please pardon me
because I just wanted to know.

The headache;
The memory;
The bitter medicines I desperately take; albeit I know is CONSEQUENCE;
Horror- banging against my moral.

Looking back to my old days
Everything was in an endless loop.
From my birth land to my new home
I climbed so many mountains and walked.
Exhausting indeed but i didn't stop on a midway.
Looking back to my 12 years old self
Life became luxurious and better.
Since then  I started to know what is life really about.
Looking back at last year
I learned about  myself and others
Hardship stabbed me multiple times
But when the sun aries,
It heals my problems and dry my tears.

Life is harder as i grow up
My goal  become diminshed.
I just realised.
The moon and the stars are just above in the sky
But in reality
They are not in my world.

A new-a phone call-
a message from My Protector,
everyone yearns to be protected
loved,
missed,and live.

Days flashed into an alloy of a hut,
skins getting drier,eyes getting sharper
the tiles of my floor replace into new shapes
to give in to my wild desire.
Maybe I'm still in the wrong time,
or maybe it's my Karma, to live, and wait.
I suppose-
I shall never hear the sharp metallic ring
attached on the back door.

I don't want to know what you tell me,
because anyone can speak.
I want to get closer to you.
I want to know the REAL you.

Maybe we're compatible
Maybe we're meant to be heartbroken.
I don't want to know the ending.

But why do I only remember
the other mysterious pair of eyes?
His stare gave me pleasure so much
I want to know the ending.

I close my eyes
I wring my shirt
My head lowers down.
Evil, defeat again.

I don't know what burns me out-
people business -or maybe my own overthinking?

I don't know why I am so worried and sorry for-
when my heart does not explicitly understand what bothers me or not.

I don't know how to cherish myself.
It's easier to convince others because they ain't me.

By my side
I have nobody.
In front of me
I have big obstacles.
I walk two steps backward
And I bumped to my past.
I have nowwhere to go
I don't want to go back to my past
Nor stays in the present.
I wish I'm dead.

What’s bad and good?  
I’m sure everything has limits.  
Who’s good and bad?  
I’m sure it doesn’t concern me as long-  
As the person admits and turns into a new leaf.  

In the end,  
What’s the matter?  
Am I happy?

I WILL GO WITH THE FLOW
AND NOT BE ENSLAVED BY
THOUGHTS THAT DRAIN MY ENERGY

The moonlight;
Waxing and waning at nights,
Comforting and alarming me in a quiet night.

Under the moonlight;
My stomach's churning and urging me to overanalyse
The security, the stability, the sustainability
I so desire agonizes my soul and  
On guard by my side on a lonely night.

Oh, moonlight:
You fascinate me and I idolize
Only you and night.

Everything is bland:
the gems are losing their beauty
the books are collecting ten-year-old dust
the clothes lay unloved-
She bent down
With her white high heels
Unworthy teardrops on those things
She once determined them unimportant, low price
Now she wants them back
To appease her unhappy life
But they are there, and not for her anymore.

I'm very distant from the City
There are no organs, just guts,
just ghastly, random blood
that mystify not me.
Trivial things, I mind
awakening to the trickle of the rain water
I, am not absorbed by the plague;
Just a little bit lost in the well-litted room.

If I have to face loneliness and death,
so that I can escape from the prison of your toxicity;
I couldn't be happier more
because it's the right thing to ease my pain.

I can feel my life is wavering;
Like a birch tree in my backyard.  


I wish I could walk backwards;
To destroy the past that I ran away with madness.


I can’t move on yet  
When it is still stubborn as a loyal pet which waits for its master patiently at the door.

I lost myself
in all the useless battles.
I really really want to know
what it feels like to be loved
by your family.
In their eyes
I'm the worst human
I didn't commit any grave sins
and offend them
I have always believed that
I'm responsible,
caring, selfless.
I have to accept
that people won't see me
like how I see myself.
I sound so desperate
because everytime,
everyday,
I'm begging for love
For Love
For Unavailable Love.

I laugh out very loud;
Earsplitting loud.
I make sound when i drink soup;
Disgusting and loud.
I talk with enthusiam;
Secrects become publicly announced.
Elephants' walks shake the ground and home;
I am sorry i can't walk like cats.
I  am just loud
I am not lonely, don't you worry?

Scarlet liquid flowing down my hand
scarring only me and making my loved ones laugh
Maybe I should have finished my work on myself
So I do not have to stare at their face with hatred.

We March to the altar.
Where we made hereafter promises
imperfection in the hands
you fie in your own seeds.

Hatred brand like a glamour knife
flashing in the air,the yellow air you know:
the red blind you strike
shall now be stamped in your eyes.

I can see the shadow
It's right behind me, listening to my heartbeat-
Called my name repeatedly
So I would remember to change my plan.

It's so quiet and determined
Like a restless spirit, ready to possess
my soul, that sees only grey.

The night is long
My shadow is fatigue,
My heart is hurt
My bones splinter
And I stay in the room filled with filthy air.

If i knew who i am
I would not have cracked my knuckles
Nor gritted my teeth and bit my tongue.
If i knew what i will be
I would have been lounging all day,
Waiting the God and men to feed and clothe me.
It's better if i don't know myself.
I don't wanna be a bad princess at the end;
But i can't guarantee i will not be.

A clueless silent night.
The wind is blowing gently, calmly,
filling in the pits
and ringing the wind chimes
to wake up to see a beautiful night.

The sky is silently watching,
floating with the wind to
wherever it takes.

The wind and the sky nurture, nurse each other
like a true lover;
making the mortals below jealous.

Even a storm can't mess things up,
if they have each other in their hearts.

Classic theme
Romantic songs to listen
Taiwan hot soup to savour
Take pictures of you and your spouse
Make this  saturday
Really beautiful and never ending.

I'm going for the Death.
I've been begging it to take me
since our first encounter
through a mutual friend.
So I can be liberated from the worries,
insecurities, pains-
that didn't have enough time to be healed.

My head will soon hit the ground
it will gently welcome me with warmth,
for my indescribable anguish and trauma.
It understands me.

My mind is confused.
My heart is burning,
Cold tears are gushing forth like a spring water
I don't know when
I will stop breathing.
I want to lay down
on a soft time, if I may, dear Life.

You stole my heart
Just from across the room.
Cliche is the love
Its the reason i live.

When i look out the window
Hoping to see answers written on the road.
Hit by my own stupidity and naive mind
All the answers evaporated into the air along with my tears
I don't know if i am on right track
I feel stuck on one pole
Many poles to walk on
Many signposts in alien languages
Hope doesn't shine in my life.

It was raining so hard.
Clouds were no visible
My tummy protesting
And "wanna be home ,hurry up " mantra,
In a state of being impatience,
It got  rainning harder;
An My bubbles thoughts was like,
I should have brought an umbrella,
Out of nowwhere
As if you know what i wished,
Formed a canopy of tree with you
Your  protective arm and the umbrella,
Rain is the cupid of our  new beginning

I saw Death.
It was crouching at my doorstep
I got a glimpse of It.
Its stare- made me a Human.

In the silent storm
I saw Its sick claws,
Scratch marks marking the snowy paths,
the ground started to split
to the Pacific ocean
to the invisible cracks of rocks
until Dust and Death, Masters of Time
Sweep away my beloved face
onto their altar, unchain him from love sorrow.

I played a game with God.
When I look at the built-in altar in my small flat
Pictures,shapes, feelings
all sort drilled into a universe of sadness.

I fall into the pit again
I kneel,
I pray ,
I beg for atonement for my sins.

I closed my eyes for a moment of silence
I saw some hope
not from my eyes,
But from God's loving eyes.

Seconds later,
I saw my funeral with ten girls around me
laying some flowers on my unloving body
then my body is burned
ashes fall on their dull faces

I woke up from the brown coffin
a cross painted on the end of the coffin
With my migrant name.
Some cheered my death
because I deserved it all,
It's a secret I was not dead at all .
I was just hidden from them for a while.

I was laid among the uncut weeds
which shelter me from the rain,
storm,
mostly from the unkind people.

I know one day i 'm not going to see you anymore.
I know i will miss you so much
The thought of losing you made me crazy.
I have lost you already
I know I have to let you go soon
Because my heart hurts everytime our eyes met.
I know you will never accept me
And I know I will get hurt
But I couldn't control myself.

I FEEL LIKE ****
THE FEELING COMES AND GOES
ONLY SOME ‘’Things ‘’ CAN **** THIS MADDESS.

I don’t know who I am.
I lose my  very tiny self-esteem everyday
my dignity is trampled and it runs along with my blood.
I lay in the bathroom,
Transfixed by the symphony written just ‘only for me’.
Wow, I’m so special.

You said you love me so much.
But your action proves otherwise.
You said you know me the best;
How ironic is that you still took me to see ugly scenes.
I don’t think I am strong enough:
I’m a tired donkey after a long-haul of your nonsense.

When will I be able to get out this slender column
bottle?
When will the Owner take the cap away?
He's flicking around it
His hand I can see
but I can't see any other else beside my own.

My tears could compose into a snowball
inside the glass tall bottle
He wouldn't let anyone turn the cap
I don't know his reasons .

I don't know how long
The walls are so slippery, I am pushed down again
It's not just me, others like me, in the sames
are trapped, are batoned, are caned,
inside the tiny hollow bottle .

In our own bottles
it's no less than prison
The hope is the cap
But, When?
Will the cap be opened?
Knock, knock
Is Thou actually listening us?

I sat by my wardrobe,
the last season, dim-witted clothes,
waving and flashing
to my face.

I took down a bright orange jumpsuit
packed it with lacquer boots
in a trunk that has
a label on it: 'Shipped to Shawn's Place'.

So I guessed they should be the last pieces
that had our wedding kiss.

Sometimes
I gasp for air so much even though I'm on a surface
I-
thirst for the water from where I came from
Yet-
it tastes like vomitted Water.
My lip salivates for I suppose Spring water,
Which nourishes your soul like Holy Water;
But, I think I will only know the Firey water

I-
Am scared
I-
Am scared I will be dehydated,
destroyed because I only know the vomitted Water

Will I ever-
have a sip of Love water?

Are you an important person?
Why must you be on my mind day and night?
I wait for the wheel of fate to point to the West,
The galaxies implode and the glories rejoiced and
they reinvigorate a drunk man-just for you.
Are we there yet? To Maisa.
I want to be received
into your dark world.

I feel like I have just been  splashed with cold water.
Upon realization, all the pains-
flood into my mind like as if
life is great at giving things.


I can't gasp enough
in the silence of
assuming---
that they're my life.

A poker face is safer
When you have no idea of this particular person
Who makes you to insensible to your  common sense.

I am madly in love
with a lot of things--
and feeling beautiful and confident.

I'm very depressed sometimes;
and honestly, I tell you:
I only feel and see black and white.

You were my world.
The reason for my motivation.
You feel like you must step on my dream
because they take time to bring dollars.

You want me begone-
away from the world
away from all, I treasured.

Yet, I had hope
I really had hope
that one day
you would change and
see me as a human.

I'm wrong.
You will never.
Goodbye, my precious tears,
to grief that's useless to others.

Let's go our ways.

It's better if my heart stays inside my body
It should know the truth.

It's better if you leave me alone
because I'm not the person who you think.

I would rather allow the pain to swallow me
so that I will still hope with trust

I'm at your mercy
when you call out my name.
And I pray
these words of yours
is 'I love you'
one day.