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1.3k · Jul 2018
No one in Sight
José Jul 2018
There isn’t anyone in sight.
Im breeding to death slowly but surely.
Stuck behind four walls and a bed. This bed is draining my energy away.
It getting harder to breathe from this room of thoughts. It eating my insanity. Why isn’t there anyone in sight to get me. Why can’t someone knock the door, maybe I’m unworthy.
I’m lost in my own thoughts, I need a escape. I can’t handle this alone.
I’m dont know what I’m feeling anymore im alwsy stick in my room and I alwsy get to me.
610 · May 2019
I am hitler
José May 2019
I am destruction and death
I wonder the impact i will make in this world
I hear the chaos and fear  i will bring to this world
I see how this war will change mankind
I want master race to be the only race in worldwide
I am destruction and death
I pretend to act in defect to everyone else so i could hide my plans
I feel this anger to this world nevertheless
I'm touch about how much progress i have made
I worry about this success not coming to display
I scream to every other race ain't the master race
I am destruction and death
I understand the pain of this world which is cause nations themselves
i say that the world is far too overwhelmed
I dream of  places i should make and make it held
I try making a new era and i been withheld
I hope someone else could see the dream i have for this world  
I am destruction and death
I see the world different from everyone else
I want to change it to something else
Something that will make sense
Master Race
I feel like every other race is a disgrace
I touch the heart of my nation with display
How the master race should be the only race
it a history poem i had to make
431 · Oct 2019
José Oct 2019
God please for once I wanna be happy
For all my life I been broken and tore apart
I just wanna be happy
418 · Mar 2019
José Mar 2019
Have you seen a empty person?
Their lifeless face full of emptiness
Eyes that speak millions of word
Yet their empty like a single
Star millions miles
Away fill with
I feel empty yet I try so hard to word this out sorry if not good.
355 · Jul 2018
I’m afraid of Summer
José Jul 2018
My  demons are coming back....
My mind is going against me....
My friends are fading away.....
I’m losing myself again.....
I’m trying please help......
I’m killing myself help.....
I don’t know if I’m going to make it
285 · Feb 2019
José Feb 2019
My father is always calling me useless and that I'm ungrateful  
Don't get me wrong i earn everything
I have everything a kid would want
Yet I feel like I have nothing
The problems is I have everything and no one to truly share it with
Oh love change a person for the better or the worst.
I guess i just will have to find out what it change me into
Im confused and i want someone to share moment with and i dont have anyone i could trust and that would care about me
280 · Sep 2018
José Sep 2018
Haven't been feeling anything lately,
my girlfriend has been worried about my safety.
I haven’t care, I’m sorry about that.
I have been happy for a while and now it all falling apart. I thought I would be happy but nothing could get me to smile. I’m just venting here because I don’t have anyone and my girlfriend think I’m sleeping. I don’t know how to come to her and tell her how much I think of dying.
Tmr I’m about to smoke three blunts for the first time. So basically this will help me with my thoughts
José Dec 2018
Well this is my goodbye letter to the world. So today mark as 6 months with my girlfriend. But guess what? she dump me a week before we made  6 months. She told me things i didn't even know, Like cheat on me. It okay, it hurt because everything i did was my fault. I mean i'm not killing myself because of a girl. My reason are my choices in life. I could have been a better person for one. Then knowing she cheated on me and it funny because one of her friend told me it was my best friend she cheat on me with. It show my worth  because i don't believe her or my best friend. By knowing that it close my case knowing my worth. I wish things could have been better but look what i'm going to do on Christmas. I'm trying to overdose. I try last night but really woke up at 3 pm.  Other reason is no one care about me. I wish people did care but i always ruin it. She move on that quick and blame on me for replacing her. I didn't wish she knew that. Well I'm useless and worthless.  I know people say it going to get better but it really isn't it getting hard to live and wake up. I just hope people know i'm going to go to a better place.
- Jose Avalos sging out
230 · Jul 2018
Wild Fire
José Jul 2018
Stuck in a house caught on fire.
I’m stuck inside with a knife.
No way out this time.
I’m trying to fight my way outside.
Can’t find my own front door.
All I can do is cries my eyes out.
Help me I don’t wanna relapse again
218 · Jul 2018
José Jul 2018
What if I can’t see you in time?

What will you think of me?

What will I think of you?
I wish I had time to see you again...
213 · Feb 2019
José Feb 2019
How broken you left?
How much i truly miss what we had in the begin
I don't miss you anymore, I hate the person
You become and what you did to me

Empty Heart is all I have left
I'm trying to think but nothing come out.
210 · Jul 2018
To Fast
José Jul 2018
Life is going to fast, death is coming quick then I expect.
I’m trying to slow down, my brake ain’t working.
I’m going to crash and I’m not coming out of this alive.
I’m alone in this car ride
There isn’t anyone now to safe me.
Even if I had brakes my life would  spin out of control.
I guess there no coming back after this.
I need a break from life. I don’t wanna grow up to fast.  P.S im new poetry and I know it isn’t the best sorry.
187 · Oct 2019
Begin of the end
José Oct 2019
Death follow will always follow life itself
From the day we are born we are set to
Doom on this world
185 · Mar 2019
José Mar 2019
I thought we would have last many generations
The matter of truth is nothing matter
Feeling like I'm living on a death row
"I will always here for you"
"I love you"
"I would never cheat on you"
Stranger with promises that are broken
Now i walk home alone with empty heart
I draw with a sliver line that paint red
Now all alone and wondering why you left
I don't know what to do with myself
Please Help me
5/16/18 - 12/15/18 never knew it would end this bad
181 · Nov 2019
Seeking Souls
José Nov 2019
I’m left thinking if you think of us?
I couldn’t love anyone else like you
The thought of us overwhelming my soul
Miss walking in the rain to your school
Maybe all the times I would rush to my school
Due to staying little longer to be with you
The time you cry on my lap when we snuck out because we thought we didn’t spent enough time together
I felt our soul touch for once and that when I knew I love you
Now that I’m alone I bear the thought of you
Betrayed by the person I thought had my love. It been almost a year without you
I really do miss you at times
158 · Jan 2019
José Jan 2019
I'm broken
I'm a monster that ruin everything
within themselves and everyone else
Even though i know everything isn't
My fault i blame it all on me
You cheated and slept with my best friend
dreaming about it and being reminded

It remind me of how worthless I am
I thought we were meant to be
You threw it to the trash
I'm broken
Because of you
I wanted you and only

Knowing your with him again
Hearing you hold hand with him
You said i would replace you
but really i was the one replace
A long time go
I'm healing from this but this girl destroy me and i still think it my fault
145 · Nov 2019
Why me?
José Nov 2019
You throw me in jail
When you left me for that person
Thought of you killed me
Haiku ?
86 · May 2019
José May 2019
I am hope and justice
I wonder how i'm going to end this chaos
I hear people are suffer in display
I see the paperwork each day
I want do the best to shine light in this world someday
I am hope and justice
i pretend to stand tall and proud
i feel like crowd know about me
i'm touched by the heart of our nation
I worry that i'm be facing this all alone
i cry and scream on this chair and moan for our soldier
I am hope and justice
I understand what our nations have to do to end such a things
I say that justice will win and light will shine into our skins
I dream of a places i will be able to rest by the Colorado springs
I will try my best till death oh wait me
I am hope and justice
other one
73 · Apr 2019
New Beginning
José Apr 2019
I runaway from Home and i don't have a lot of money if i want to go back home. I'm going to try to train hop. I don't know if life just get better or worse
I'm kinda lost but not lost
49 · Oct 2019
José Oct 2019
I’m sick of the reminder of us
They always put smiles on my mind
Then I have to remember it all came
To an end
Why am I thinking of you
Depression heartbreak heartbroken

— The End —