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slr Jan 2
Are you're doing it in a healthy way?
Are you watching what you eat?

Yeah.. That's why I didn't have a bun with dinner.

What I didn't tell her is that watching what I eat means
watching what i would normally eat sit on the shelf
watching what i would normally eat go to others
watching what i would normally eat shrink off my body

She says I've gotten smaller
My coworkers say I've gotten smaller

I don't see it

When someone asks if I've eaten I just avoid the topic or say I've had enough

If someone is concerned I laugh and say "I'm back on my anorexic *******"
slr Nov 2018
“I’m sad.”
“Why?”
“She gets more likes on Instagram than I do.”

“I’m happy.”
“Why?”
“I have a bed to sleep on.”

“I’m sad.”
“Why?”
“My parents won’t buy me a car.”

“I’m happy.”
“Why?”
“I have food today.”
Why not be content with today?
slr Nov 2018
I love you
But you will never know
Because I am too afraid
Of myself
Messing it up again
So I won't
Tell you.

Not yet.
Maybe one day.
Maybe one day
You will see it.

Maybe one day
We could be together.
Who knows
slr Oct 2018
i’m afraid
you’ll find me
crazy
for loving you
too hard
too fast
too much
i want you
to know
all my thoughts
but i’m scared
you’ll run
I love broken poetry like this
slr Oct 2018
Sweetheart you need to be have a flatter stomach
Put down that soda pop
Or one day it will make you pop
Put down those puff pastries
Or one day they will make you the Pillsbury Dough-girl.
Take up crunches and sit-ups
And just ignore when your body screams for food
Take up ******* in and waist trainers
And just ignore that ******* in all day weakens your muscles pushing you further from your ideal

Hey good lookin’ you’d be prettier if you had smaller thighs
Stop eatin’ them donuts
They turnin’ you too dough
Stop ordering your pizzas in larges
They turnin’ you large
Start doing some squats
Just ignore your back screaming in pain
Start running sum more
Just ignore that bigger thighs mean a lower risk of heart disease and premature death

And a simple request from everyone else: make sure your hair always looks like a girl from a movie, that your skin is flawless, you dress perfectly, are always happy, smiling constantly, have an aesthetically pleasing Instagram, be in an adorable relationship, know all the newest music and shows

You know what

just be perfect
but
not to perfect


-love society
Don't let society tell you anything about yourself. You are you and perfect just how you are.
slr Oct 2018
mov•ie
\ ˈmü-vē \

noun

1.a story represented in motion pictures/motion : noun : mo·tion : \ ˈmō-shən \ : an act, process, or instance of changing place/forward, backward, up, down, pacing, running, crawling/how we flee from our lives, our problems, our responsibilities/instead of focusing on motion we look to pictures/picture : noun : pic·ture :  \ ˈpik-chər \ : a design or representation made by various means/click, zoom, import, export/our lives are on a flash drive, on a snapchat, on an instagram, on a memory card/everywhere but on our own memories/we don’t like pictures either/they show moments never to be regained from our past/our solution?/combine them into something better/movie : verb : mov·ie :  \ ˈmü-vē \ : an escape from reality/we use movies to deflect the pain of our lives/we think that we watch because we are bored/no/we watch to escape/escape : verb :  es·cape : /əˈskāp/ : a recording of moving images that tells a story and that people watch on a screen or television.
I wrote this a while back but I fell in love with dictionary poetry after it
slr Oct 2018
There are rivers everywhere
many are just out of sight.
    The ground is told to be ashamed
    for the home it gives these rivers.
          Because of that
          the ground tries to hide it’s rivers.
              The ground covers its imperfections
              with anything it can.
          It covers these rivers not because they aren’t beautiful
          but because they have ravaged clean canvas.
                        If you look closely at the soil
                        you will see hundreds of these little streams.
                              They are deep in some places
                              but shallow in others.
                                   Their color can be that of blood
                                   or the color of scars not quite healed.
                                           These rivers are not just at the surface
                                           for they come from the depths of the soil.
                                                   Taking years to fully carve their place
                                                   and take a lasting toll on the ground.

                                            I am my own piece of ground
                                            with rivers flowing freely.
                                    They cover my body
                                    engrained in so many parts of me.
                         These rivers show me where I’ve been
                         and where I will go.

                My rivers have faded
                from scarlet to peach.
         My rivers are permanent
         and I struggle to find their beauty.
My rivers are seen as ugly
so I try to hide them.
         My rivers are not talked about
         because I am told they are shameful.
                 My rivers stretch across my body
                 and carve at its banks daily.
                          I have tried to dam the waters from flowing
                          but new paths just keeping appearing.
                                   Yet, through it all I have learned from my rivers
                                    that beauty comes in all forms.

My rivers are beauty
in its purest form.
I know I haven't posted in a long time so I thought I'd come back with an old poem that I love.
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