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He closed my mouth made me look at my crumpled in the mirror.
He took her in my arm and ***** the little Lily
Her shouts flowed into the walls my blood sold over her  innocence
He took on her arm silent her  shouts made
Her  sanity got  sick.
He put lipstick on her lips
He found her  and abused her
I did not know who spoke to him, he got her  head up and he told her  lies to sleep.
At least her  nightmares were more fun.
He took her  arm again and  she shouted but no one heard
She  fell
She was still feeling his skin in her teeth
She looked into my mirror and she  was abused again
Her hroat was dried her  unprotected life, but he defeated her again
The wolves  eaten her  flesh ,they were lliving  inside me.
One doll, two dolls
...and she  was abused
She drank poison to sleep.
She was trying to not scream and he liked her voice muffled.
Her atrophied mind was again abused.
He tightened her  body
He lived from her , he pulled her  hair closed  her  mouth blurred her lips with lipstick and played with her  as a doll
And he ***** her again.
I am a pole dancer who knows a lot of  love stories , even more  but than many churches have heard .

And I never felt no one goes quietly when the subject is love no one predicts the disillusion
As no one knows why the disappointment life is mortal but everyone wants to be accepted but and love?

Unfortunately the love I feel for you still is hot in my veins .
I know he still shines inside us
I do not want to be your friend
What do I do with so much love I feel?
I do not want to whistle to the moon
I do not want to be barefoot in Saturn What do I do with the love that I still have for you ?
Blow as the dust?
I can not be your friend
I'd rather wait to  until December over the sun.
I know that everything has the end that lovers can become friends but what do I with love ?
I’ll Use gravity on the sands ...
I’ll Make poetry without senses
I’ll whistle to the moon.  
I’ll go down to the sea
I’ll slide my body over the fire
But...
I do not want to be your friend because
I do not know what to do with the love
That I still have for you.
Shirley Antonio Dec 2018
I feel that humanity has changed a lot.
That the pleasure of sugar is no longer sweet.
I feel that the freedom to imagine the imaginable has been lost.
I feel that the blood in our veins is no longer hot.
What if I scream?
Will I help to save the world ?
Can we conquer anything with pain?
Can we paint our lies with grey ?
The freedom that the human being has to make choices is no longer a priority.
What is the meaning of life?
Why are we born if we die?
Why do we kiss if we suffer?
had to scream, so no one could hear me .
I had to jump so nobody could save me.
Everyday single day...
Someone falls apart, someone is born, somebody needs reach.
I woke up in the morning, combed my hair, looked at me in the mirror without have any desire.
I sat under the tree to smell the summer.
As the children asked me about love and he’s definition
What about love?
Love is now the song we skipped on the playlist.
Love is the main sentiment of every dreamer.
Neither the greatest thinkers in history nor logic can find concrete definitions for feelings.
No one lives without love, so there is hatred.
In each cup we drink the poison of ingratitude.
The flowers are no longer immense.
These all words, figures of style and pleonasm ...
It was just to define how our life can be a great illusion
Shirley Antonio Nov 2018
I feel that humanity has changed a lot.
That the pleasure of sugar is no longer sweet.
I feel that the freedom to imagine the imaginable has been lost.
I feel that the blood in our veins is no longer hot.
What if I scream?
Will someone help me?
The freedom that the human being has to make choices is no longer a priority.
After all, what is the meaning of life?
Why are we born if we die?
Why do we kiss if we suffer?
With each leap with each smile, a world dies.
Someone falls apart, someone is born, somebody needs reach.
I woke up in the morning, combed my hair, looked at me in the mirror without any desire.
I sat under the tree to smell the summer.
As the children asked me about love and its definition
What about love?
Love is now the song we skipped on the playlist.
Love is the main sentiment of every dreamer.
Neither the greatest thinkers in history nor logic can find concrete definitions for feelings.
No one lives without love, so there is hatred.
In each cup we drink the poison of ingratitude.
The flowers are no longer immense.
These all words, figures of style and pleonasm ...
It was just to define how our life can be a great illusion
Shirley Antonio Oct 2018
I'm trying to be born again.
I'm going to conquer the world.
I'll fight against the time.
I'm going to live my dream.
I'm going to get up early in the morning.
I'm going up to the sky to have a hug of yours.
I'll dream you're here.
I'm going to draw your smile on the stars.
I'm going to get all the money in the world.
I'm going to win prizes and collect merit.
I'm going to buy a compass.
I'll wear the best clothes
I'm going to create ties.
I'm going to climb the highest mountain
But father ...
You're not here anymore.
No moment will have meaning without you.
No compass can guide me, only you.
Only you could tame all my hurricanes.
Only your good-night kiss on my cheek kept me safe.
Only your scent made me feel alive.
Now you've decided to leave me papers and pictures as souvenirs.
Now I only have your legacy as a bible.
I no longer have your hand to hold when I'm afraid.
Scent dad  father mountain compass prizes
Shirley Antonio Sep 2018
Pull the trigger.

**** me.

So that I can no longer paint my emotions with lies.
Sometimes you just can't describe moments you only feel it


I was waiting for my prince but he never came.
So I went looking for him.

It's as strange as people go from lovers to strangers.
Do not bring love today,
I want your shame.


My hobby  now is to see depressed girls with pink wigs.

I need you to hurry up when you're going to make decisions.
Because I need you now.
Here on this terrace near the sea.
Looks like I'm lying on the seashore.



I wanted to be like God.
Have access to a door to the infinite of an unreal place.

To be honest, we all create an unreal world a surreal fantasy when we are rejected.

And so when the pain begins to flow, we look for ways to define love.


Do you think I'm a ****** girl?


Pull the trigger.

It ends my agony of not being able to love.

Pull out the rug.

Drop me into reality.

Sometimes people make us think we're on the test.

No one can see anyone's heart.
But we all have a concept of what the other feels.
No one can see the heart beating.
But everyone thinks we're alive.

Pull the trigger.

And I end up feeling like I'm repeating the same mistakes.
I do not want to have unreal feelings.
Get the feeling of being looking for nothing.

Pull the trigger

**** what's already dead
Shirley Antonio Sep 2018
Amy
Dear Amy

The sun is smiling at you
The beach calls you
Why are you hiding ?!
You're so beautiful, put on your bikini now and go show off your body.
Are not you shaved?
Your hair on the body is not sin, it was God who put it there.
Show the skin, show the veins show your face.

Dear Amy

Your face is so beautiful your skin and so lush, but remember what I told you?
You're more than that.
Your beauty will pass by one day your lush skin will have wrinkles.
But your mind and your brain will  have knowledge forever.

Dear Amy

I like your legs I like your body, I like to see you in every way.
You do not need them to find you ****.
Put that lingerie on you and show me those stretch marks.

Look in the mirror and say:

Damm! My stretch marks make me a mermaid.
My weight makes me happy and  I was not made to follow standards.

Beauty standards  weaken me
And I'm a woman
I'm not weak.

I was born strong and no one is going to take that away from me.

I was not born to please those who do not care about me.
I am confident and I make of my scars experiences.
You need to hear this truth.
You do not owe anyone your body.
You do not owe anyone your sanity.
And even if you change, you will never please everyone.
The only  person who has to be  pleased is me.
Today wash your face and leave the makeup, show the freckles, let the skin breathe.
But tomorrow if you want to put your lipstick red and slay.
Do not let them steal your freedom.
You are a butterfly.
 Free yourself
And fly.

Dear Amy

Stop selling your brain girl.
Stop selling your sanity.
They do not deserve the prominence you give them.
Remember that you have fire inside.

Seek  for yourself   in the midst of your imperfections, date with your insecurities.

You need them  to feel alive.
Do not give them the pleasure of controlling your brain.
You are selling your feelings to leeches.
Nobody is perfect.
Accept this .
They do not want to know what you feel.
They want to rob you of the right to speak.
Take the shine you have inside you
And let it flow.
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