AC: Favorites

Sep 2020 AC

Mystery

Sep 2020 AC

Meisiekind

Mystery

How can I move on
When I still hold on
To that little peace of hope
Maybe I can only hear
Your voice once more
Cant let you out of my heart

Each day I'm screaming for you out loud
Knowing you hear my ache and need
Your the nightmare in my head
Still stuck in every dream
Leaving me without a sound

Feels like I'd lost you to the dead
Knowing you are somewhere
But out of my reach

Silent without a word
Still no answers for your actions
Having all those emotions
Bleeding with a open wound

Feeling all your pain
Know I'm still the one
But to afraid to love again

Love that hurt the most
Losing your soulmate

#heart #hurt #love #hope #ache #pain

Mar 2020 AC

Different types of Light

Mar 2020 AC

Nyx

Different types of Light

I'm not like the sunlight, I'm not warm and bright
My rays don't sparkle nor glisten with light
People aren't drawn to me in the summer haze
They don't spend their afternoons adoring my gaze

I'm more like the moonlight within the darkest nights
Not bright nor beautiful but still providing some light
My rays are soft and gentle, peaceful as such
I won't burn nor blister the people with my touch

And though I arent as loved, nor am I as romanticized by poets
I'll hide in the shadows of silver clouds, You'd hardly even notice
But I'll give you what I can, I'll listen to your woes
So even on the darkest nights, you won't feel so alone

So come sit upon the rooftops, every once in a while
Rugged up in a blanket, show me that perfectly imperfect smile
Cause even though I can't provide the same love, as the sun gives days
I promise I'll stay by your side, giving you little glisten of moonlight
Forever and Aways

~

Different types of lights with different types of lives
Though moonlight can be just as nice as the sun

#sunlight #moonlight #heart #simple

Feb 2020 AC

Square One

Feb 2020 AC

Nyx

Square One

I'm a fool who's rage is written on a page
Flickering with fire, fueled by a painful desire
Unruly and unjust it burns without control
Till its content with its remains of dark ash and coal
Seeking no shelter, though it must be contained
She screams as she cries trapped in a cage
Walls adoring her, only growing stronger with age
Dreading the knocking that echos so loud
Fumbling with the keys, throwing them to the ground
Huddling into one's self, as the world grows c o l d
Yearning for somebody who can allow her to be whole
As she kicks and she screams, pushing them away
It's difficult to get past this tremendous facade
That holds so well, ingrained into her being
Disregarding the world and others well-being
How heartless and cold
How selfish and bold
Pitiful you are
with that narcissist mask, you hold
Dance me another dance
Within that ballroom of yours
Filled with the most beautiful flowers
And those demons that taunt at all hours
Its cold deep within, even with fires set aflame
As she continues burning within her own stone-cold cage.

Here we are again,
Square one.

~

Setting fires within a castle that you build to protect your own
Burning all who dare to draw in to close
Though the knocking won't stop

#square #one #feelings #breakdown #idk #trapped

Feb 2020 AC

Stuck in my Throat

Feb 2020 AC

Nyx

Stuck in my Throat

I talk too much or not at all
As I'm afraid to sound self-centered
Talking about my insecurities and woe
Just end up making me feel so low

I open my mouth and words pour out
Trying hard not to sound like a victim
But the more I explain, the more in vain
As the worry and fear grows heavier

Communication is key

I understand this to be true
But to capture the full extent
Of my mind at bay is difficult
As words barely make a dent

As I hold my tongue
And the voices they plague me
It's selfish to talk about my own
I fear you take my words as pleas

Framing myself as incapable
Needy and attention-seeking
I can't speak on behalf of my own
As these feelings keep creeping

All these words getting caught in my throat
Leaving me with poor explanations
And them with no ability to understand

~

I always feel like when I talk about myself that I come off to other people as being self-centered, victimizing myself or just searching for attention and pity. So I stop even though all I want is to allow people to understand me, these words keep getting stuck in my throat

Jan 2020 AC

the sky always cries when we're together

Jan 2020 AC

z

the sky always cries when we're together

"do you know how it's been raining a lot lately?
it's because the sky is envious of you and me,"

those were the words you told me
for whenever we met, the sky cried
like a baby whose candy was taken away
the thunder would roll, and the clouds would grey
but you and i, we stayed the same

"the sky is jealous of us meeting"

but for why?
and you told me,
because it's lonely
it has no one to hold

i used to complain
that it would always rain
and so you told me,

"next time we meet, and the rain falls
you should ask the sky, why, are you jealous?

you should be.
because i have her.
and she has me."

thanks, choi seungcheol.

#rain

Dec 2019 AC

The Hacker & The Poet

Dec 2019 AC

Angelo

The Hacker & The Poet

You use your coded words,
Building up my feelings for you.
I never shared my secrets like that.
Never said how lonely I felt,
But now I don't feel as alone.
You are there in my life.
You inspire the words that I write.
My twisted metaphors,
My once empty writing,
They hold you in them.
You're there in name.
You're there in comparison.
You're there because i put you there.
When a poet falls for a hacker,
They realize that they can hack more than just software,
Or bypass firewalls.
They can hack our feelings,
Bypass the walls we set up,
And infiltrate our systems.

I'm at the time of writing this, seem to have found myself to have fallen for somebody, a rare thing that has happened to me.

#love #hacker #poet #pair #metaphor