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 Dec 2021 ilo
Leah Carr
Moving on
 Dec 2021 ilo
Leah Carr
Soon I'll live in another world
Where colours paint the once-empty words
"Someday, I'll get better."

I thought they were lying
When they looked into my watery eyes, as I was crying, and said
"Someday, you'll get better."

Now that healing is drawing near
And light is flushing out the fear
Here I am, saying loud and clear
"I am getting better"
Didnt think I'd live to write a poem like this...
 Dec 2021 ilo
Zoe Mae
Never mind the time
We should listen to the sun
Abide by her shine
 Dec 2021 ilo
Zoe Mae
 Dec 2021 ilo
Zoe Mae
I want to go to my grave unafraid,
at peace with choices I've made
I want to go to my deathbed
not regretting every word I said that day, with clouds in my eyes and raindrops on your face
If it comes down to forgive or never live, I'm unafraid
Because I can do both today
I will do both today
 Aug 2021 ilo
the rain makes the asphalt look sad and pregnant.

i turn my head for one moment and a lonely 7 train skitters by, barely grazing my left ear. i close my eyes. i close my eyes because if you look, you get sad and that's how you lose. so i look down at my feet at the soft, shimmering asphalt instead

and i watch the train through the asphalt. it torpedoes by, one silver frame at a time, like a silent film still bobbing around in its chemical bath. i continue to watch, from a safe distance.

(its like looking out the window at the cars zooming by. its all fun and safe until you reach your hand out a bit too far and the next thing you know, some ******* car up and runs away with it.
its like marriage.)

except im in college and the wheels of the train never quite touch the ground, but hover, hover over like some kind of homeless intoxicated guardian angel stranded in a sprawling urban desert.

(he lies on top a one of those BigBellys, lies on his stomach, sandaled feet dangling just inches from the ground. blink blink, goes the BigBelly. Gabriel groans,
incomprehensible muttering)

and the train throws bleachy yellow squares of light throw themselves onto upon the pregnant asphalt in fits of just destructive laughter and when they hit the ground by that time they're already hugging themselves, hugging and shaking all over like fuuuuuuck, it's sooo cold in here (in my body!) each one of em murmuring in a foreign tongue about how someone keepzon etching street names into the bathroom walls

Thayer and Broadway at 3AM on a Wednesday morning is someone's oasis, mine for as long as i stand here, my mind stumbling back n forth from one airpod to the other as i feel like im sinking down, down into the soft squishy asphalt wit the weight of my backpack making my shoulders touch the floor wit my bleachy yellow head dangling from my neck as i blink needily / cravingly / searchingly at a sidewalk that stares back at me with the most deadest honest (to godest) blankest expression i ever seen on a no-body

and when i look into its eyes i can see myself but im standing in the  middle of Times Square and -- hey -- everythings looking up! but it cant be me because im here at Thayer and Broadway dangling my head and angling it AWAY from the passing train because if you look, you get sad, you think of home, and when you think of home, thats when you really know you've lost, not sure what but you've lost and you probably cant even actually go home after youve lost because, well, mother**** it you've lost and life just likes to call you a cuck and hit you in the throat like that

but i wouldn't know, i haven't gotten that far yet
here i am standing at the intersection of Thayer and Waterman. the rain glistens on the deserted streets and it's beautiful, but really, all i want to do is go home.
 Aug 2021 ilo
 Aug 2021 ilo
i want to slot your nose bridge against mine
giggle when our foreheads bump
catch your lip between my teeth
exchange breaths and find that
yours tastes like my soap
stop eating my ****** soap
eat me instead
 Mar 2021 ilo
Jason James
I Lost You
 Mar 2021 ilo
Jason James
You came to me
In darkest night
And set yourself atop me.
I wanted you
And you didn't stop me.
Finally got my chance
Did the horizontal dance
On broken floor boards.
Couldn't get enough of you
I wanted more
But I lost you
To an airplane and my own insecurities
I lost you to the sunrise
For you were just a dream
From which I had to wake.
It's more than I can take
I just want to go back to sleep
Where you're there for me to keep,
But I lost you.
 Feb 2021 ilo
kristine w
 Feb 2021 ilo
kristine w

flames hail,
so They wail
in Whoseforest.

the smog of it all,
has the system dull
in Whoseforest.

wails of help resound,
but are Their voices really found?

a peasant man’s dime too little,
a wealthy man’s dime too many.
the kings lounge
as scorn rages
and rages
and rages
in Whoseforest.

the peasants beg,
“your majesty!
choking up
our lungs,
Their lungs,
Her lungs.
this tragedy
is one of ours
of yours
deploy a strategy
have you not?”

the kings sit
with the wealthy
sipping tea
eyes lit
with lax smiles.

but just like Them,
their voices go

peasant, wealthy, royalty
all born and bred
of the same ancestry
brothers cry,
but brothers stray

They too,
both and bred
of their ancestry
but descendants soon
fall flat

mother nature now speaks,
“for we are all born and bred
of the same hearth
should it not be our earth
to love and share?”
She,too, wails
for Whoseforest.

so tell me now,
whose forest?
in light of the recent unfortunate australia wildfires :(
 Feb 2021 ilo
burnt omelettes
 Feb 2021 ilo
I'm eating a burnt omelette
with sides so hard I'd spit them out
and I wonder if I can spit my heart out
maybe then I'd stop feeling
all my feelings
and things wouldn't be so hard
and I wouldn't think
"am I going to snap?"
and then snap
and then pretend like nothing
happened at all.
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