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Feb 2018 · 84
Who knows Forever?
Denecia Feb 2018
This can’t be life
I had to think twice
You said that we would be forever
That you would never leave
Well how come now it’s just me
I think these walls are starting to cry
Who knew the sun could die
There’s no light, only dark
No cool breeze, only slow rain
Happiness is temporary, forever is pain
Feb 2018 · 83
Everyone loses
Denecia Feb 2018
Growing up she wanted everything
She realized that sometimes you get nothing
Blessed and cursed her feelings ran deep
Talking so deep it’s hard to sleep
Hates to speak but knows what’s brewing
Holding on to what some would consider nothing
She takes it all so you don’t have to feel
Hardest fruit you’d ever peel
The pain runs throughout her heart like blood through veins
She hates to get wet but loves when it rains
She thought she lost you, well it felt like it
You tell her that the feelings are wrong
It’s all in her dome
She should be more tranquil
Maybe don’t wear that shirt
That style just won’t work
You don’t know but you’ve proved her point
But her feelings were wrong because she didn’t lose you she lost herself
Oct 2017 · 230
I'm messed up
Denecia Oct 2017
It's cool
I'm fine

These things I say,
I usually don't mean
They're usually just a blanket,
A blanket I toss over my heart
It's doesn't help me feel better,
But it helps you
So you can believe you're not breaking my heart,
Shattering my very existence with words that you probably see as nothing
But see I'm too messed up for that to be true
Maybe it's the pain of my absent father
Maybe it's the pain of feeling alone
Maybe it's the pain of not knowing why I'm here
Maybe I can't be who you want me to be...
Oct 2017 · 163
Is it unrequited?
Denecia Oct 2017
Late night,
In the dark,
Matters of the heart weigh heavily on me
Thoughts of losing you makes me feel empty
I'm usually more stable, please excuse me
You just seem too important to ever love me...
Oct 2017 · 226
Early Life Crisis
Denecia Oct 2017
Wanting everything but enemies
Materials mean nothing when you ain't got your brother
What happened to loving one another
You focus on grammar just to escape the message
Having tough conversations with yourself cause no one else will listen
Maybe you don't want them to
Maybe you're better off fixing it on your own
Maybe you're just young you'll figure it out once you're grown
Plot twist, that doesn't happen
You're still lost, steady looking at the map
You flip it, maybe it's the wrong way
Or maybe it's you that's got this whole thing wrong
Life's not going to wait
You better figure it out soon
Look in front, it's your classmates everybody's ahead of you
Oct 2017 · 374
Nightmare on my heart
Denecia Oct 2017
There's a pain in my heart,
Because it's almost dark,
And I know I won't be laying next to you
Why couldn't I just do right by you...
Oct 2017 · 120
With Him
Denecia Oct 2017
He is incredibly him
The best him, he could possibly be
He brings out the best him in me

Looking in the mirror, seeing him behind me
In this moment I feel love is real

It's so easy to take
He chooses to give
On my own I'm just alive
He helps me live
Oct 2017 · 178
The Moving Fence
Denecia Oct 2017
Been tryna stay hella positive
But sometimes that's hard
Cause people will walk right past your feelings with no regard

You been tryna turn me into you
And it makes no sense
Thought you loved me for me
Why did you build this fence?

Putting up this fence who you tryna keep out
I got my own plans, why you tryna throw my **** out

You got plans, plans, plans but I got a lot of plans too
Why is it so hard for you to share with me, I've always shared with you
Oct 2017 · 342
When Trust Means Nothing
Denecia Oct 2017
Pain rings around my heart
Thoughts in my mind of you with another
How could I be so blind
Is this all real
Or will I wake up, cold sweating
Vetting, but what's the point if the action is nothing
Arguing for nothing
Searching for nothing
Instead of looking through my eyes, I want you to take this heart from my chest
I mean you already had it but this time I want you to use it
Use it to feel my pain
Feel the feeling of having your trust mean nothing
Take it, hold it, see if you can sleep with it
I know I sure didn't
Oct 2017 · 142
Problems With The Host
Denecia Oct 2017
Lately I've been In another world
I hear you but I don't hear you
Thoughts been racing, hard to fall asleep
Looked online it said to count sheep
But I keep counting problems
Don't tell anyone because they'll try and solve em
I got maps but I don't know where to go
Wish I could live in my mind it's the safest place I know
All my problems are in here but I don't have to face em
People seem sincere but sometimes it's hard to place em
I don't know if their the problem or if I'm the problem
All I know is I got problems
And they hard to face
So I just keep em stuck in my mind it seems like the best place
Because out in the open they cause pain
Sometimes I feel like my mind just needs a drain
Or maybe just alcohol
Jack or Paul

— The End —