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I feel as though Im in a well
A deep dark well that I cant seem to get out of

I can hear the laughter
But they cant hear me
I can see the smiles
But they cant see me

Its like im in a well thats slowly filling with water
one day Ill make it to the top
but for now Im just drowning.
Sick of being the ugly friend
Sick of being the friend noone cares about
Sick of being the friend that has to try because noone else makes an effort
Sick of trying to help but being taken for granted
Sick of being the friend that always walks on the grass
Sick of being the friend thats last to get invited
Sick of being the friend that gets mad fun of constantly
Sick of being the friend that gets chosen last
Sick of being the friend that gets walked all over

Sick of being
Ignored
Invisable
Talked over
Pushed away
Used

Because I can only take so much
Soon I wont even be your friend at all

But I guess you wouldnt even notice
Im dying
Emotionally and physically
I dont think I want to live in a world without her
Shes my bestfriend
I remember sitting in her kitchen for hours just listening to her life
She would tell me of black and white tvs, ehen you had to scrub floors on your knees
She taught me that hard work is worth it
If she leaves
Ill miss her hugs
Her talks
Going to her house regularly
Her "i love yous"
Her baking
Ill even miss the thick fog of smoke that clung to the walls slowly turning her own home into a haunted home.
I ******* love you and really want you to stay
All I need is someone to lean on
Im sorry if that drags you down
Maybe you could lift me up
Well if your strong enough
We could even take turns
I just want to know someone cares
It may be annoying
But ive been told im worthless my whole life

Im just scared
That one day
You really wont care
You will realise im worthless
And leave
Just like everyone else did
Another one
Another person dying
Another story
Another smile
Another tale
I dont know if I can cope
I feel as though Im not even drowning anymore
More like allergic to oxygen.
If someone told me
That I was the most insecure human in the world
Id believe them in a heartbeat
Do you ever just feel empty?
As though your veins are hollow and insides are nothing but air?
As though you look at yourself but you dont see any colour
Like you are feeling so much that you've just stopped feeling at all?

Because thats how I feel right now
Hopefully it wont last for long
Broken windows
Shattered dreams
Fragments skattered
Its not what it seems

It may look like I want an easy life
It may look like I want a hard life
It may look like I'm a coward
It may look like I'm a super hero

It may look like alot of things
But at the end of the day
Its not what it seems.
Its getting more and more difficult to breathe
Maybe its just my mind
But something tells me Im not as healthy as I seem.

My chest tightens
I freeze
I get scared and cry easier
If you really understood what anxiety
Felt like
Then you wouldnt be so mean.
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