Two Parts of a Broken Heart

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

I want to travel the world with you;

just to walk by your side in every city.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

Mama,
you hurt my heart.
Who are you?
You've gone away.

Mama,
I wanted to be just like you.
But not now.
Not these days.

Mama,
why are you drinking,
before my game,
before you work?

Mama,
why are you so selfish,
making everybody hurt.
I don't even know you these days.
You're not the same
with the games you play.

Mama,
I wanted to be strong like you.
But for now...

I'm just through.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

Why I write.

If you want to know what I write about,
look in the mirror as you walk by.
Do you see your eyes;
sometimes green, sometimes brown,
but always filled with kindness.
You hold your smile there,
that's how I really know you're happy.
If you want to know what I write about,
look at your feet when you have someplace to go.
Do you notice how one foot turns in more than the other?
Putting a bounce in your step;
a bounce that becomes more profound as you get hyper.
If you want to know what I write about,
listen to the echo of your laughs.
You have three different ones;
each bringing a smile to my face when I listen.
They are so infectious, I can't help but laugh, too.
If you want to know what I write about,
look to the creator of your dreams.
The beautiful mind that paints the pictures on your eyelids as you sleep.
I want to know what it thinks about constantly.
Who do you hold in the back of your mind?
What secrets do you keep?
What feelings do you feel?
If you want to know what I write about,
look into your heart.
Look at who you are,
what you do,
what you stand for.
Look at you.
You are my best friend.
You are why I write.

A little rough around the edges but you get the point.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

I try to escape you.

Sometimes,
I try to escape you.
Whether in my thoughts;
or in my day.
I have become spectacular at blocking out
the memories.
But sometimes,
I try to escape you.
When I see the curve of your cheek
lit in the soft moon light
and all I want to do is reach out and cup my hand on your face;
I try to escape you.
When I close my eyes with you right next to me;
and I dream of interlacing my fingers with yours,
my head on your chest.
When I can hear the actual sound of your heartbeat being imitated in my sleep;
and I wake up and wonder.. hope.. That I wasn't dreaming;
too afraid to ask in fear of being chastised for wanting you..
I try to escape you.
And in the morning, I prepare myself to go home.
Even though I know I'll miss you
and only think of you when I'm there.
But then you ask me to stay one more night
and I can't say no to your beautiful green eyes
or your bright smile.
I try to escape you.
But I can't.
**My love.

This isn't meant to be a sad piece.. I just love you too much sometimes that it hurts my heart.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

Just let it go.

Every one has problems in their lives:
The broken family; the high school bullies;
the twisted neuron in the brain.
We all have things that happen to us;
maybe you dropped your keys as you walked out of the door, or your mom called to tell you she wasn't visiting this weekend..
No matter what it is;
life will bring you down.
Repeatedly.
It doesn't wait for you;
It doesn't say "oh, they're having a bad day, better be nice."
No.
If anything, it comes at you harder than before.
Who are all these lonely people?
You don't know their stories,
you don't know what they face when they get home.
But imagine they are exactly like you.
Hey, it's okay to go home feeling awful
and take twenty minutes to sit in the shower;
just lie down there for awhile and cry your eyes out.
No ones judging you there, you can be weak for awhile.
But after that...
Just let it go.
There is no reason to hold onto things that break you. It doesn't change anything anyway.
All you can do us wake up the next morning and decide to be happy; to disregard the negativity and be positive.
You are your own light, no one else can be it for you.
It's okay to be weak; but it is not okay to give in and let the bad things control your life.
You may be hurting, but I guarantee you will feel a lot better if you just
*let it go.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again- La Dispute

Out where the stones lay like bones by the ocean.
Out where the waves crash contempt on the land.
Someone was trembling for fear of the tempest;
somebody silently reached for their hand.

Said, "Understand that if you're cold I'll keep you warm.
And besides, there's so much beauty in a storm,
so come down with me to the shore.
And what's more..
I adore you.

So tell me, what is there to fear?
You think some seraph up above is trying to rob us of our love.
Because the sky's not clear;
My dear, you know there's not.
Now listen to the rain upon the rooftop."

But the wind picked up

Out where the stones stand up like thrones beside the ocean.
Out where the waves make a grave of the sea.
The lovers struggled in the middle of the tempest.
And water angrily crawled up onto the beach.

Said, "Hold my hand and stay with me;
We'll be released."
But the tide clung like an anchor to her feet.
And though he tried to make the water line recede
It pulled her out into the sea

He could not break apart the waves to bring her safely back in.
He watched her hand break through the surface once;
then disappear again.
Forever wait inside the sea for me, my dear
I hear you.

You speak in every curling wave,
and sing in every violent breeze.
Someday not far away from here;
my dear, I swear I'll see you.
And we will hear the seraphs cry;
for they will still envy you and I.

How they envied you and I.
How they envied you and I.
How they envied you and I.

One of my favorite songs.. Such a great use of poetry.

Two Parts of a Broken Heart Feb 2013

When I leave: a dream filled reality.

Leaving you will surely **** me;
I don't even want to this time.
But I'm a big girl now,
a big girl going off to college.
I can picture it:

I open the door to your room,
you're shuffling around with something.
Your back is to me.
I stand there silently for a moment;
letting you distract yourself.
I'm about ready to break,
but I don't know how strong you'll act
so I stand up tall.
Suddenly, you crumble.
And I'm there.
Holding you up, telling you I'm here;
that I'll never let you go.
Whispering everything I can think of;
catching your tears;
pressing you into me to try an swallow you up;
to just have you within myself
where I never have to leave you.
After who knows how long;
after I've gotten everything out of me
and maybe you did too..
I press my forehead against yours
(I have to be on my tippy toes; I'm not tall enough.)
so we can just cry for a moment, together.
Then, I tell you I love you;
take a deep breath;
whisper, "goodbye"
and kiss the smooth spot on your forehead.

I think I die as I walk out the door.
I'm really not sure though.
I try to break the surface of my daydreams
before they break my heart.
There are two horrible parts about this dream.
One: this is an impending doom
I can't escape.
Everyday is a grain of sand, falling away.
Two: I don't even know if you'll notice my absence.
I mean, I know you will.
But I don't think it'll break you like it will me.
Not that I want that.
I just don't want you to let me go.