Assuming the world would stop spinning
in the next hours
I would take you to the bar
and dance.
Share one last drink.
Clink glasses.
Feel you next to me.
That would be feeling of being ready
to face the end.

Take a wedge of cheese.
Hold it into the sun.

Look through the holes.

I'm the cheese.
You are my eyes.
The world shines through you.
I'm melting away.
Cheesy cheese is happy.

Often I think that's it. The way I want things to be.
My future life.
Think this is gonna be my wonderful home.
We can grow old like this.
Together.

At good times I'm convinced of that.
But sometimes the thoughts getting dark and sinister.
Bonding is binding.
I won't do it half-heartedly.
I'm afraid of sharing my life.
Losing my control.
Relinquishing my independence.

And then I see you and everything lights up and I ask myself:
Why are you hiding your life?
It should be OUR life.
OUR control.
OUR independence.

You say you can't believe in god.
I trust in god, like I trust in physics.

Your world has been shattered.
Mine is safe and sound.

You went through despair and death.
I've seen not more than flowers wither.

Your unfaith is made by experience.
My faith is made by the words of others.

You're confident of your philosophy.
I just trust in faith.

A tunnel separates us.
You went through it and lost god.

I wonder whether I'll lose him too.

Seeing your warm body leave,
which has lain besides me
up to now,
makes me feel empty
but also full,
because now you are a part
of me.