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Turtle Grylls May 2013
JAY
nothin
yep
what
crack
dogpoop
lol
bananas
Hitchcock
what da ****
like mayo?
got beef?
Hussein
Mad Libs
Donkey
Asian Jesus
Brown Rice
Cross-Country
Mexicans
Asian Eminem
Royce Da 5'9
Skype
2.3k · Apr 2013
Beef Jerky
Turtle Grylls Apr 2013
Beef Jerky.
Beef is made from beef,
Jerky is something I have no clue what it's made of.
This poem doesn't rhyme,
but I'm out of time,
so I may as well make it rhyme,
and do something with my time.
Beef Jerky tastes like beef.
Yum.
794 · May 2013
F*ck the SAT
Turtle Grylls May 2013
It's May, of '13, and I
In the eighth, 13,
have to the the ****** SAT.
I'm only thirteen, but Asian, so
like all the other asian kids,
I HAVE TO TAKE THE ****** SAT.
I've been study'n,
readin',
math',
BUT I STILL DON'T WANT TO TAKE THE ****** SAT.
"You're too young to take it...", my friends said.
"Not that I want to," I say
"It's just that I'm asian,
so I have to TAKE THE ****** SAT!"
...
Well, it's almost the first of June,
when I take it,
the MOTHER ******* SAT!
769 · Apr 2013
Random Cake Poem
Turtle Grylls Apr 2013
I beat eggs like a mixer,
because I have no idea how to use one.
So my hands be all doughy
cuz I just told you how that's done.

— The End —