Raindrops fall
The heart aches as the pain releases
And the mind begins to relapse
The eyes stare into the distance
Praying hopeful thoughts of the future
Attempting to make sense of this life
Pain in every fiber of an agonized body

Where can I go if I am not content in my skin
Where could I be without love for myself
And how could someone love me
Could someone love the man
If the man believes he is the devil
If the man believes he deserves the gallows
Rather than a kiss goodnight
Why does death entice
Even when you’re given everything you want
Never having to struggle

This is the confusion of life
Being eternally unhappy in a world that doesn’t care
Your disappearance is a flash in the pan
Your life a worthless blip in time
And though you want to believe people love you
The idea is unfathomable and flawed
No one could love a human birthed by hell
A human who could vanish and see the world improve
Death is the ultimate step up from life
This is the truth
Raindrops fall
And the world turns on

As children we would dream and play
Often times dreaming our daytime away
Our minds was a designer at their creative post
But now the world has a more sinister host
In place of dreams our demons take hold
Fears, doubts, and sorrows untold
Unforeseen pressures from worldly events
No wonder we don't want to leave from our tents
Our imagination crumbles at the forces of life
With realities first punches creating our strife
Yet we all force a smile to carry on our way
Because we cannot express our feelings today
Remain in the shadow, bury your fears
And thus I have done for the past few years
Why life cannot be careless and free
Is something that was always perplexing to me
Through the hurricane we call life we must carry on
So for one more day I put the mask back on.

How do we say what sits in our mind
Without falling to the consequences
The painful and unforgiving kind
That manage to alter each of our senses
Unsure of the words you'll sit and try
To construct that perfect alibi
To explain away the confusion you face
Until you reach your peaceful place
A place where there is no way to harm
But only feel love as they sit in your arms
Though the road to this place is unclear
The truth is that it may soon be near.
Though we sat in the darkness up to now
Soon sanctuary will emerge from it's cloud
And as we try to describe how we feel
Or declare how it may not seem real
We must stay strong and weather the storm
To reach sanctuary with all of its warmth.

I have found myself in a world unknown
Where my heart is lost and my mind aches so
Not sure how to feel or think on my own
Not sure if my feelings should stay or should go
Deep down I know that things will be alright
And yet I still sit awake and think through the night
I think of my feelings past, present, and more
I think of the days in which I was adored
I dream of the future and what it may lead
These are the thoughts that spur emotion in me
My minds puzzle just seems incomplete
As if there is one last piece that I need
In this struggle I hold on to my faith
And sift through the multiple thoughts in my wake
Yet there is one thing I know will be true
In this unknown world I will make it through

Shadows appear to dance with delight
Amused by the sorrows I feel tonight
It seems my pain which they do hear
Fills their eyes with humorous tears
Why does my pain give them such glee
That they must go and dance so free
Circling me in the darkest night
Life begins to seem dark; not bright
Silently they begin to draw near
And yet it is not the Shadows we fear
Struck with solitude, sorrow, and pain
These are the things we fear to attain
So as I hurt in the darkest night
Watching the Shadows come closer in sight
I bottle their humor, deep down inside
And wait for my Shadows to just pass me by

Fear, the lion crouched in the grass of our lives
Patiently it sit's, stalking your mind
Until the perfect moment approaches at last
Pouncing on you, the monster strikes back
Consuming your life instantly  
Yet fear is weak and incredibly frail
Do not let it cage your life in it's jail
Experience life, do not live controlled
As i myself have come to behold
With my soul mate by my side
And the strength of God resting inside
I will break down the wall's of fear and know  
We will venture together into the unknown

Confused Signals
Between jokes and true pain
My heart's just outreaching
For your love all the same
No negative intentions, inside what i've said
Just playful stupidity from within my head
My own words, just let your thoughts go
Yet I cannot seem to just let it flow
Flow out of my mind like driftwood in the sea
But this love is infinite, between you and me
My own insecurity, mixed up with my fears
Since no one has ever loved me as you do my dear
So forgive all the nonsensible things that I say
My worst nightmare is if you walked away
So i'll learn to think free, and just let it flow
Before I disappear in my mind's undertow