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5.7k · Aug 2021
Endless Dream
ATILA Aug 2021
What was the point of this reverie
If it just came and walked away
Bringing my soul
Strolling again
Those deserted roads
That once cherished our presence

Were you there
Expecting me
Or was it just an embodiment
Of the memories of our ordeal

Who was the actual one
Who willingly became a liar
Who was the first person
Who built mushy hope
Before crushing it
Without any grounds you toyed with my heart
Like disastrous hurricane
That unexpectedly surged and vanished

You were only a shadow
Of wretched past
Whom sometimes got carried away
By my unsettled endless dream.
It’s you.
3.5k · Nov 2018
Satanic Humans
ATILA Nov 2018
I hate how some humans
Take religion as a barbican
To hide their devil moan
Making people believe on them
With I-Love-God as a slogan
Little did people know
That these humans give satan their vow
Every single day, every single night
Considering satan as partner of candlelight
Fulfilling satan’s needs
With gestures of evil deeds
But are not judged by people
Cause they have religious eye-lids.

Their hearts are rotten like scorn flesh
Disgusting as maggots die consuming that trash
Their minds are undoubtly abnoxious
Visualizing how to make world hideous
They utilize pious mannequin
And hide their monstrous beings
Yes these creatures exist on earth
Whom cause pre-armageddon to burst.
It took me a long time to write a poem with this theme so yeah, hope it doesn't flop!
3.4k · Oct 2021
Longing
ATILA Oct 2021
Was every word from you actually heartfelt
Or were you played with it
Was the longing that you said genuine
Or was it all act

The longing for you
Has been a part of me
Though the sun sets
Though the sky changes
Though the spring fades
My heart still never lost track of you

The beauty of rainbow
Put a smile on every face
After ugly rain
But only full moon
Would keep with my gloomy night
Longing for you

Don’t lie to your heart
That once embraced by hope
Before it invites uncertainty
To accept my love

Enliven a thousand sweetness
From the past grasp
To end my longing
Link our bond of love
To make us one
Cause it is all mutual
Let go the anguish along the horizon
To brighten the full moon
Which would witness our talking hearts.
Memories bring back everything.
3.1k · Dec 2018
Nature Remedy
ATILA Dec 2018
Nostalgia and memories
Hope and reveries
Love and peace
Tears and craving-for-remedies
All bonded together like quarks.

The undying dream of mine
To be flawlessly contented
Is overflowing from my spines
Ah I want contentment to be mine!

Today,
I find my happiness in nature
In the serenity of seashore
In the scenic stature
In the golden green of pasture
In the classic scent of roses
The nature with its appealing scenery
Tickles a sense to smile at the thrill
A vibe of peace; nature contentment
Really becomes a fulfilling feast to end my lament
All hail to Lord who creates this nature remedy
And makes my soul breathe sturdy!
@ Home Beach Village Resort, Pantai Cahaya Bulan, Kelantan, Malaysia.
[181228 - 181229]
1.9k · Nov 2018
Let Me
ATILA Nov 2018
The sun peaks from behind
Just to warmly say hi
I encourage myself to smile
And view the world without a sigh.

Let me observe what is right
And detach the wrong knit
Let me decide with supreme might
To avoid the doom pit.

Let me face obstacles without fear
And let my body steadily bear
Let me cure the wound with tears
And change the misconception of dear.

Let me enjoy my worldly life
But not abandoning the true divine
Let me kiss the moment that rife
To make my days stay shine

Let me live within the moment
Appreciating the oxygen given
Let me strive to be competent
In studies, in work and in romance.

Let me be the real me
Who is weak but love Lord
Don't judge, don't peeve
Cause I believe not only me is odd.

To live a life that is hella dificult
To be a girl of diamond worth
To ignore any kind of evil cult
To make my mark on Earth
I thank myself for these endeavour.
I wrote this only in 20 minutes. It might not that good but I TRIED.
1.8k · Feb 2019
A Blooming Flower ♡
ATILA Feb 2019
Take a look at a flower that we adore
And observe this precious creation to the core.

Those tiny petals free themselves from the bud
And bend towards the ray of light
Workshipping sun to stay on sight
Though sunlight is absent at night.

Day by day this flower blooms
Revealing its beauty even in gloom
The production of honey sweet scent
Introduces us of its own patent
Attracting those diligent bees
Flirting with vibrant butterflies
To generously share its honey product
Cause life is all about giving without doubt!

A blooming flower; a genuine wonder
Asking us to thoroughly ponder
How significant its existence in nature
Teaching us not to stop hoping for the future
As this flower will not stop blooming
Until its growth has fully matured.
Has been obligated to write a shape poem that I never tried before. It took me almost two hours to write this simple poem, ISTG it is soooo hard :'( And I can't share the actual result/pic of my shape poem here ><
1.1k · Nov 2018
Open The Door
ATILA Nov 2018
Open the door.
Let me in.
If you don't open the door,
I'll break it down.
I'll cut your throat,
make you bleed,
drink your blood,
chew on your guts.
With dead people's energy,
I swallow up the living.
The dead are above the living.
This is not my poem but it's a line from my favourite horror+thriller+crime korean drama, The Guest. I just write it to look like a poem. If you feel wanting to watch a powerful drama, go check this drama out! It is friggin' great! <3
1.1k · Mar 2019
Purrfection
ATILA Mar 2019
Here is a poor cat
Striped, sweet and shy
Minding its own world
But somehow feel grateful
For the touch of me
Who is passing by.

With saint hazel eyes
This cat artlessly purrs
To provoke a symbiosis between us
Surpisingly soothes my blue whale heart.

It also seeks for a comfy gesture
That will fit just right
It is that simple and pure
And makes heart feel light.

What a purrfection cat!
That prides itself for having fur like velvet
But never acts like a brat
Leading me to give it a soft peck
Because we have a same wavelength
Plus wanting another species to cherish our rant
That sadly never ends.


There's a saying;
'Humans who think cats don't understand them are the stupidest ones'
So imma get all lovey dovey with this cat
See if you care.
Weird poem but OK :(
1.0k · Jan 2019
YOU, My 'Bestest' Friend
ATILA Jan 2019
Don't you think our friendship is amusing
We rarely have a meeting
Or people call it a friend dating
Yet we're still contacting
Freaking every day one's thinking
How to make each other amazing
And to improve attitude doing
Not just to use fluffy words babe-darling
But to manifest love in our own way
And avoid separating.


Do you notice,

When you're happy
My heart dance genuinely

When you brightly smile
My heart is closer to you a mile

When you're excited
I'm donating my limbs to be cheered

When you utter something
I agree without hesitating


And do I realise,

When I cry
You provide a comfort room to rely

When I feel exhausted
You swing to be an energy booster

When my mood turns down
You send sweet phrases that make me frown

When I feel bright
You add another enormous light


When flower loses its scent
When world seems come to an end
My vast light is from a best friend
YOU, whose love never bent.
An infinite gratitude to you for spending your precious life with me ✨
790 · Oct 2018
Malaysia
ATILA Oct 2018
My country is aesthetic
Shown by elegant hibiscus
Glittering by its own
Growing with majestic delight of cliffs
Due to country's ups - downs
Yet still resting faith on this land
To be the best place for future hibiscus
So that Malaysia will forever unique
This is solely what I cherish.
770 · Nov 2020
Stargazing ✨
ATILA Nov 2020
Sit down here for a while
Look up and observe the sky
With a kaleidoscope of dreaming eyes
Contemplate how the stars shine
Complementing the beauty of night
Brazing to be the brightest sight
Bearing the heat by constant burning
Just to illuminate one’s world.

Turn your face beside
And savour my talking heart
A canvas made of refined stardust
Count the sparks of it
That complete anxious dots from your stare
Faith in myself when I say
Your tender existence already be the best being
Your enchanting gaze lights up dusky room I was lost in
Your warm embrace convects my flower’s needs
Makes it fully blooming.

You are solely my star
And I’m eternally stargazing.
“Am I your star?”
“Of course my dear, you are my star.”
ATILA Nov 2018
DAY 1
I read about a very long list of phobias, these are the examples;

● astratophobia = fear of thunder and lightning
● paraskavedekatriaphobia = fear of Friday the 13th
● cacophobia = fear of ugliness ><
● ligyrophobia = fear of loud noises
● onomatophobia = fear of hearing a certain word or name
● peladophobia = fear of bald people
● hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia =fear of long words :D

Eventually I discover that all of us have phobia of this one; HADEPHOBIA. Fear of Hell.


DAY 2
"Make your foot rare at the house or your fellowman,
that he may not have his sufficency of you."
[Proverb 25:17]


DAY 3
A genuine smile is the most attractive thing you can wear,
it is absolutely universal and rarely could not bear.


DAY 4
We verily created man and We know what his soul whispereth to him,
and We are nearer to him than his jugular vein.
[Quran 50 : 16]


DAY 5
Man, whose past is a clot - a clinged drop something related to *****, whose abdomen at present is filled with what he excretes and whose future is to become the rotting dead body of grave.

How flawed are us.


DAY 6
"I call a man who understands the suffering of others as a religious man."
- Mahatma Gandhi


DAY 7
Aisha said, "I brought some soup which I had cooked, and told Sawdah (the 2nd wife of Prophet Muhammad PBUH), with the Prophet sitting between her and me. 'Have some!' but she declined. I said: 'You either eat or I smear your face.' She would not eat, so I took some soup from the bowl and smeared her face. Allah's Messenger laughed and lifted his feet off the floor. He said to Sawdah: 'Smear her face!' So she took some from the bowl and smeared my face, and Allah's Messenger kept laughing."


DAY 8
Human imperfection is not here to scare us,
it is here to bring out the best of us.
so that we can be like a severely bent tree that continues to produce good fruits despite of its incovenient position or angle from the ground.


DAY 9
Noah is referred to as the 2nd Adam since mankind started afresh from his time, after the deluge and complete destruction of mankind. Therefore, a 2nd part or phase in the mankind history started from him.


DAY 10
Powerful telescopes enable this civilization to see far into the space,
but sometimes due to the 'blindness' in its right eye, it fails to see the Creator's hand in it.


DAY 11
“A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
[John 13 : 34-35]


DAY 12
A knowledgeable person is he who is never satisfied with what he has learnt and also adds the learning of other people to his knowledge.
- A hadith qudsi


DAY 13
Be as gentle as the whispering breeze
Spread solace to the world we’re in
Let your heart and soul be a mirror clear

Yet when you master all of this
Forget not your neediness
Were it not from God’s grace
None of this can be achieved!


DAY 14
"Have they not reflected within themselves?
Allah did not create the Heavens and the earth and everything between them except the truth and for a fixed term.
Yet many people reject the meeting with their Lord."
[Ar-***, 30:8)


DAY 15
One of internet culture is keep searching for a prey to harass or bash. And there is this saying, "Give a man a mask and he will show his true face.” Just because you can hide your identity online, it doesn't mean you can harass and bash other people freely. Be mindful. Be kind.


DAY 16
"And when My servants ask you (O Muhammad), concerning Me – indeed I am near.
I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me.
So let them respond to Me (by obedience) and believe in Me that they may be (rightly) guided.”
[Al-Baqarah, 2:186]


DAY 17
Prophet PBUH said: "No calamity befalls a Muslim but that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it, even though it were the ***** he receives from a thorn."
[Narrated by Bukhari]


DAY 18
The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed,
a stronghold in times of trouble.
[Psalm 9 : 9]


DAY 19
Even when life is frail
God's love prevails
It never fails.

Jonah's life was frail when he was in the whale, but God's prevailed, it did not fail.


DAY 20
God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
[Psalm 46 : 1]


DAY 21
"There are times when I want to die so badly, I think the need itself will **** me. Of course, it never does. I always dream of better places, how anime life and 2D things are so much better than real life, where I could actually become something and be something other than stupid me. I have made so many stupid decisions. I can't keep a secret about myself, because I am so stupid and naive and stupid and dishonest. I'm useless and an idiot and a ******* and I can't do anything right, I can't make right decisions, I can't even **** myself. It's impossible. But I still want to die."
- a diary of a depressed girl


DAY 22
● "He is the only one without a second." [Chandagya Upanishad 6, 2:1]

● "Of Him there are neither parents nor Lord." [Svetasvatara Upanishad 6, 9]

● "There is no like Him." [Svetasvatara Upanishad, 4:19]

● "There is no likeness of Him whose name is a great glory." [The Principle Upanishad by S. Radhakrishnan]


DAY 23
● "Hear O Israel: The Lord our God is one Lord." [Deutronomy 6:4]

● "I, even I, am the Lord; and beside Me there is no savior." [Isaiah 45:5]

● "I am God, and there is no one else; I am God, there is none like me." [Isaiah 46:9]


DAY 24
“You shall have no other Gods before me.
You shall not make for yourself a carved image,
or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above,
or that is in the earth beneath,
or that is in the water under the earth.
You shall not bow down to them or serve them,
for I the Lord your God am a jealous God."
[Exodus 20: 3-5]


DAY 25
According to biological law, our body cells ought to renew themselves indefinitely thereby leaving us; human, not knowing old age or aging or death at all! So biologically speaking, we could be always young, agile, dynamic, vigorous and absolutely defect-free in our immune system. But hey, imperfection is here."


DAY 26
“To all those suffering from sadness or depression, know that it isn’t your fault. It isn’t because you’re weak. It isn’t because you’re just not grateful enough. It isn’t because you’re just not religious enough. It isn’t because you don’t have enough faith. It isn’t because God is angry with you. To all the well-meaning people who tell you this, just smile. And know deep in your heart that the tests of God come in different forms to different people. And know that, by the help of God, every test can become a tool to get closer to Him. And that, verily, with hardship come ease–and like all things of this world–this too shall pass.”
- Yasmin Mogahed


DAY 27
We may not see the literal or initial being of God, but we can eventually see His display of power or evidence of His being or presence in what becomes or results manifest to us, be it in creation or in our very own existance or make up.


DAY 28
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
[Psalm 147 : 3]


DAY 29
After all, our innermost thoughts and feelings affect what we talk about and even how we look.

_______________
Hi! This may not a poem :') During the last Ramadhan (about five months ago), I had set in mind to read lots of books to cheerish this holy month with at least, a good deed. So, this is a compilation of what was I reading from the 1ST day until the last day of Ramadhan. Enjoy!
593 · Aug 2020
Re: attach
ATILA Aug 2020
Announce that you love me. At least to your best friends. I can’t bear to think that I’m not your trophy to be proud of. I can’t accept that my ray of light becomes dimmer day by day. I can’t stand the thought of sitting like a tomb in your soul, camouflaging with darkness that engulfs all sense of love. I can’t swallow the fact your face didn’t spark when you said I was your everything. I can’t comprehend when my existence in your world ain’t shimmer like a dewdrop catching the sun.

Announce that you love me. At least to your siblings. I don’t want to stay timid in the darkest compartment of your heart. I refuse to admit that you ignore me in four days — summer, autumn, winter and spring; three days — yesterday, today and tomorrow; two days — day and night; one day — everyday. I deny that you don’t feel immortal anymore when I linger around you. I oppose the idea of maybe your love to me is paperweight.

Announce that you love me. At least to your heart. Do my picture still be your favourite wallpaper? Do your heart palpitates everytime you hear my name?  Do my warm embrace puts an end to your insecurities? Do your mind still replays our memories of spending time together when sun came out, and we were miles away from anywhere? Do. I. Actually. Exist. In. Your. Universe?

I never doubt my love to you. It is you who should stop underappreciating me, and start loving again.
Stop taking love for granted.
489 · Dec 2019
One Stable Force
ATILA Dec 2019
He often rejects to talk passionately
when he insecures I won’t anticipate
about his plain day
or his current read
or the cosplay he dreams to wear
or the animé figure he recently bought
or just
his absurd thought two seconds ago.
Little did he know
I’d negotiate every inch of mine
just to forever listen to his chatters
that actually send electricity to my bloodstream.
I wonder
what had the universe conspired
to create this worthy man—
my one stable force
and make me fall in love to him
even deeper.
419 · Mar 2019
Random, haih
ATILA Mar 2019
To put an effort to read
Is on another level of powerful deed
Though you only learn 0.1% from it
When it's actually the other 99.9% you should heed
Don't demoralized, just don't quit!
Cause there'll be a day when you can use this minuscule knowledge
As a whole merit
To eliminate one's ignorance livid.
A 10-minutes poem.
384 · Nov 2020
Someone
ATILA Nov 2020
Someday,

Someone’s going to laugh on how you lose your spectacles while you’re actually wearing them
Someone’s going to be interested on how you enjoy your food, or work, or sleep
Someone’s going to understand your current feeling just from the way you exhale
Someone’s going to adore on how you hold the frustration when your thoughts were misplaced that day
Someone’s going to tie your knots and complete the constellation of your puzzled mind
Someone’s going to bite her lips, seeing your face lights up when you’re talking about sports
Someone’s going to be in awe of your soul — an infinite library that she craves to peruse forever
Someone’s going to ask you about the mountains you want to conquer, and the battle you would survive after setting only barefooted
Someone’s going to listen to your rant about the regrets that slithered under your skin, ****** the bloodstream, and took you over
Someone’s going to fall in love with your human parts — the depth of you, and every photon that shines in between your broken limbs.

Someday, someone will come. Just have trust religiously.
She is that someone.
377 · Feb 2020
Seven Things
ATILA Feb 2020
i.     He calls me sunshine.
ii.    He hypes up my pictures.
iii.   He reaches me every day.
iv.   He tries to speak in my favourite language.
v.    He absolutely knows how to flatter me with love.
vi.   He spams me with morning and night wishes.
vii.  He still makes time for me out of his packed schedule.

Best of all, he is **** serious with his life vision with me.

— seven things I thought they wouldn’t happen to the insignificant me, before you serendipitously came into my life.
I seem already fall in love with you.
343 · Nov 2018
Adoring Knowledge
ATILA Nov 2018
Knowledge is like a sun
That swallows all mourn
Every single day never flunks
Creates my brain cell bonds
And makes my soul fond.

I genuinely adore knowledge
Because I know how dumb I am
And my brain is useless lamp
Adorn with only music jam
Priceless knowledge I feed my brain
To make it damp
In surviving this hideous *****!
309 · Aug 2020
Let Her In
ATILA Aug 2020
This is the right time to tell her your heart is actually beating her name. All you should do is open your door and say, “Come in.” Lock your door and throw the key to the seventh sky.
Let me in.
287 · Oct 2018
I Love Thee
ATILA Oct 2018
There is no word to tell how much I love thee
Not with a full ink pen to build captivating phrases
Not with a clear notebook to write bombastic words
And I genuinely hope this ain't just a phase
Cause thou make my whole world
A girl with thee, I am lacking without thee
My soul is ever setting out to win thee
Forever, this will be.

Roses are red, violets are blue
Love thee babe, like dawn loves dew.
236 · Sep 2020
Impermanent
ATILA Sep 2020
You are like sublime light at the scarlet sky before the sun sinks into the horizon.

Mesmerizing, but momentary.
Him.
236 · Mar 2020
If You Let Me In
ATILA Mar 2020
If you let me in
I’d bundle up all your insecurities
and create a new constellation from them
I’d shift my whole attention to you
like sunflowers turning to the sun
I’d build an observatory
to verify that stars in the sky
are not as brighter as you
I’d fight to be your gravity
so that you would stay still with me every second
I’d ask the moon to tell the night
how charming you are
when you wink a star from your smile.

I know you don’t see yourself
as worth as I see you
But hey, here are functions of a partner
To remind that you worth a galaxy
To be flooded with your presence
To prove that you orbit in my atom
To be thankful for your holy existence
To show that you are the first snowflake in my winter
and my spring’s first bloom.

If and only if you let me in
and be your absolute sanctuary.
Happy World Poetry Day!
235 · Jan 2020
I Hope
ATILA Jan 2020
I hope when I walked into that place and bumped into you, my whole body did not react like it had many times before. I’d wait for my ultimate existence to completely abandon me, for my lips to shut down from glueing any smile, and for my legs to freeze up to fall to the ground weeping at your sight. But nothing happened. Nothing. Happened. There was no chemistry bonded inside me when we locked eyes. I couldn’t sense any wavelength between us anymore. I couldn’t feel any spark of electricity in my universe that I dreamed to live with you. You just looked like a regular guy with your regular hairstyle, nothing profound about you. My heart must have cleansed itself of you due to many late-night cry, must have gotten tired of me blaming myself for what had happened, and squeezed the feeling out of me while I was busy engulfing in tears.

Though we were both in the same ship, we were actually stayed in different cabins. Though we dreamed to revolve entirely around us, I was still galaxies away from you.
[Tilla, 29/01/2020, 11:00 p.m.]. Inspired from Rupi Kaur.
221 · Jan 2020
A Whole New Dimension
ATILA Jan 2020
We are astronouts of mind
landing on each others’ moon
just to discover the beauty
behind those distinct craters.

We are astronouts of soul
reaching to each others’ star
to divulge the perfect imperfection
lying from those twinkle.

After attaining in the new dimension
Your eyes are locked on mine
So that I can perceive vast galaxy
instead of just pupils.

And when you smile at me
every ounce of my breath
floats like midnight smoke
that refuses to vanish.
A little throwback with some sense of feeling.
162 · Mar 2020
Little Details
ATILA Mar 2020
Do you realise actually
it’s the little details of you that ignite my weary soul?
How shy you look
when I told you that your face is a whole art
Or the way you nervously talk
when your eyes are locked into mine
Or when you refuse to leave first
though we already spent 25 hours that day
Or how your ‘I’m always here for you’
becomes an absolute assurance
Or the way you update about you to me,
even provide pictures
Or when you lovely mention my name
that I end up fangirling over your voice a second after
Or how your daily compliment
puts a period to my insecurities
Or your journey to complete the broken me in dark
even if your eyes are closed.
These seem insignificant to some
but your aura runs through my vein
That I thought about stitching you into my skin for real
So that I’ll experience these little details eternally.
A less-than-10-minutes written poem.

— The End —