did you notice when the words shed their skin?
the hour was late in the idle day
and the light of significance grew dim.
at the shore, the waves compelled you to stay

and you saw, in the waves that slid away
all the ways in which you could not alter
the crash, and retreat, of waves come to claim
what was only ever borrowed from them.

be that ocean, it is asked of you, and
your wheel will keep bringing gifts to the sand.
sea and desert, two serpents coiled, two

vast multitudes, and between, some small truth
recurring. this world is a single breath
and uncounted smiles; no words for the rest.

somewhere in between the outer reaches
of meaningless ***, and the inner tomb
you land in after the last spinning room
of several tequila shots too many

you will discover, your vast finitude
is not everything it’s cracked up to be
and the siren songs of your hidden sea
signal the wreckage of solicitude

but everything that sinks reaches a place
where up is clearly distinguished from down;
though light receded, and breath forgotten,

something ever unaltered, if but trace,
opens the way to return to the sound
of graceful footsteps, on paths untrodden.

consider the inner stream
all that flows in you
all you hold true and hold yourself true to
desire, fear, and dream

the words and their copula
what you want to say
and what you will leave unsaid, to keep safe
hidden phenomena

the thoughts that ebb up against
all the things you saw
the grief, despondency, and joy they cause
and their consequence

the icons sunk and swimming
time, person, sense, home
nights alone, things for which you must atone
waters shimmering

those you loved and those you lost
those you won't let go
secrets you keep, emotions you won't show
gift, fishhook, cost

a thousand different currents
are pouring through you
memories, questions, laughter, light, heat, clues
your defeats and triumphs

a thousand confluences
baptised with your name
out from every corner of life they came
and found congruence

and you were once without form
but then you opened
to let in the dancing multitude whence
came your singular course

all flow with the inner stream
finds its source without
and all that flows would flow back out, no doubt
desire, fear, and dream

—

if ever you are lost
follow the stream
it begins with opening
and leads to the unknownness
that you didn't know you were looking for
all along

days of wanting
days of having
days of losing

days of wanting again
days of having but not the same
days of losing what never was

days of wanting what cannot be had
days of having what will always be lost
days of losing whatever remains

waiting praying begging

for the days
           to come a little less
                                    predictably


          ­                                                             sudd­enly—
                                                           ­               out of nowhere


days without want for anything i am not already
days unconcerned with having anything i am not already
days of laughter and dancing and friendship without end

and i
for all my foresight
never saw any of it coming

morning came
not only the night we left

behind us
our dreams and intimacies

each other
all for the slow forgetting

distant star
light cast off like a shed skin

morpheus
adds us to the collection

letting go
does not come so easily

for those who
against fate, held others close

i thought i saw you walking
between the morpheus trees

the leaves in autumn auburn
dancing in their descending

to lay themselves at your feet
as welcome, your charity

each soft step kissing the earth
i gave chase, for what it's worth

but i turned one way, and you
another, leaving no trace

and now this place keeps secrets
of stories that could have been

and now all but a few leaves
remain unfallen, and i

deep in the still and quiet
patient, await their return

i thought i saw you walking
between the morpheus trees

with a little luck, next time
it will be you seeing me

what happened
to the song in your heart?
is it lost to you?
it will never end, it
will play on new instruments.