Don't make decisions
when you've got a broken heart
for an unattached individual
with forgotten promises
abandoned memories
rejected phone calls
wrecked expectations
deserted arrangements
dreadful lies
forsaken mixed signals
slowly it will **** you
ripping the heart to pieces
soon you'll be
crept up to loneliness
regretting all your dumbfounded decisions
left with an empty feeling
with happiness never coming your way
for this will ruin you
and tear you apart

I wonder what it is like in outer space
would it be a wonderful place?
does it take all our problems out
or do we have to scream & shout
is it somewhere we can be free
where there's nothing to worry
all these thoughts I cannot fathom
oh what have I become
my curious self is slowing showing
all these facts are always growing
please someone just take me there
to have new memories I can share
outer space is where I belong
I've just realized that all night long
so take me there
to save me from my despair

I am jealous of your bed sheets, that gets to know what happened throughout your day
That gets to find out all your secrets at 3 in the morning
And gets to know who the real you is
I am jealous how it gets to listen to your heart beat every night before you go to sleep
Jealous how it gets to listen to all your favourite songs
How it's able to comfort you from the cold, because I wish my embrace could do that
I am jealous how it's able to wipe out all your tears from the bad days you've been having, because I wish I could take away your sadness for you
I am jealous how you look forward to be in your bed every night, because I wish I could be your home that you come to
I am jealous how it's always there for you, even if you didn't need it
Because I just hope that I could be there for you even if I didn't have to
But I can't because you won't let me be there
I am jealous how it brings you comfort & warmth
For how I wish I could be the one to comfort you
Jealous how it gets to tuck you in every night
And how it gets to sleep and be with you whenever you want to
Because I wish so bad to be with you whenever
Mostly I am jealous how it's where you want to be at most times, when you have your dark days
Because I just want you to come to me in the times where you're at your lowest
I am jealous how it knows all your stories, your strengths, weaknesses
Because I just want to be able to know them too
Jealous how it's the most comfortable place to be, because I wish to be your safe haven

I never thought someone
A girl at the age of 16
Could be filled with so much sadness
Her blood type "D" which stands for depression
Eyes that are bloodshot
Eyes that are filled with a lot of regret
Eyes that has lost hope in everything
Eyes with crushed dreams
Her eyes are so beautiful that used to be filled with happiness
Her eyes heavier than the baggage she carries
But her thoughts are heavier
But she makes an excuse saying she's fine
But she can't escape the thoughts she has on her mind
She smiles away her pain
No one knows that nothing can keep her sane
And she tries
She tries so hard
But she can't go back
Can't go back to who she was before

She had lost her innocence
She lost her innocence when her own father asked her to try & lit a cigarette on her own
And she did
She smoked away her problems
She lost her innocence when skipping one class wasn't such a big deal until it became a habit of doing it everyday
She lost her innocence when the positive attitude she had in life got poisoned by the negative thoughts that her ex best friend had & so it rubbed off on her & now all she got is this negative mentality
For every time she breathes, she breathes in the pessimistic air that had consumed her lungs & gotten to her brain
She lost her innocence when she let herself got attached to people, only for them to walk away
She lost her innocence when taking pills were the only thing that could make her happy
She lost her innocence when she puts her guard down, only for her heart to get broken
She lost her innocence when she let herself fall deeply
She lost her innocence when she tried to fix someone else, that led her to self destruction
She lost her innocence when she first tried alcohol to forget about him, and ***** tasted the same as his lips, tasted like an addiction, habit, and full of regret
She lost her innocence when she first had drugs and it tasted like things were finally going back to normal for once in her life
She lost her innocence when she sent pictures of her body to a boy, to make herself feel better by the compliments he told her
She lost her innocence when she gave everything to him & she let him touch the other parts of her body, to keep him satisfied, happy, & so that he wouldn't leave her
She lost her innocence when she broke her own rules just for him

But she was long gone
Physically alive, but mentally dead
Everything falling apart all at once
Crashing down on her & a person can only take so much pain
And she didn't know what to do & how to make it stop
She didn't know how to stop loving someone who didn't love her anymore
She didn't know how to make her parents stop yelling & fighting from the unpaid bills & she couldn't make her father stop smoking to stop spending all the money on cigarettes, while her mother does all the job
She didn't know how to deal with a goodbye she never got
She didn't know that within a year she could lose someone that meant the world to her
She didn't know that she lost herself too, that a person was able to take her heart & happiness with them
She didn't know that you could meet the love of your life, but doesn't mean you end up with them
She didn't know until now that she was never good enough & is easily replaced
She didn't know she'd be awake in the middle of the night at 16, missing someone that she gave everything to, only to have her efforts wasted
She didn't know that saying "I'm fine" could make others believe her & they did, when she really wasn't

It never occurred to me
An inflicted pain could cause this much damage to one individual
That one person has this much impact to another
That they could have this much power to make you feel like this
That these things could actually happen to her
That her so called best friend would turn back on her & make her feel worthless
That her own parents were fed up & tired of her behavior & eventually she started to believe to the things they made her feel
That no matter how hard she tries
It just won't be the same anymore

No matter how hard you try to fix broken relationships, friendships, and people , some things aren't meant to be fixed. You will have no control over this and sometimes all you can do is let it go.
2. You will get your heart broken, a lot. Doesn't matter how prepared you are, it will hurt and maybe for a very long time. But time heals everything and eventually all this will pass by.
3. You will get attached to people you never thought you'll talk to ever and you will tell them your life story, but eventually they will leave and you'll watch them walk away. And it is alright to get sad about it.
4. Take chances and tell people what you think and how you feel. Yes, it will be scary but it will also be satisfying. I think it is important to speak your mind and to be brutally honest, because you'll regret the things you never say and you will also regret some things you say. But always let your thoughts be heard.
5. Stop torturing and comparing yourself to who is better at it. Be happy of who you are because there is no one best at it other than you.
6. Remember, you are your own hero. You are the one that picks yourself up after every time life punches you right in the stomach and hands you all the pain. Don't be so ******* yourself, learn self-love. You'll be happier trust me.
7. Get out of your comfort zone and try different type of things. Amazing things don't happen by doing the exact same things. Change things up a bit in your life cause you might end up getting over a fear or find something you might have true passion for.
8. There are always firsts for everything in life. So go ahead be spontaneous as you can be. Be glad that you're still young cause you've got your whole life ahead of you. Enjoy your adolescent because it will get hectic in the adult world.
9. Have time just for yourself. It's alright to shut the world out for awhile. Sometimes all you need is peace and quiet. Just a time alone to think about important things.
10. Get some sleep and rest. It is the best way to find temporary peace and forget about all the problems you have.
11. Your education and future is very important. Strive to be the best you can be. You know that you can be the best if you're willing to work hard for it. Prioritize and manage your time wisely, trust me it's a good working habit to have in the future.
12. Thank the people who have helped and shaped you to be who you are and where you are right now. Thank the people who have underestimated and misunderstood you, you've became stronger because of this.
13. Know that sometimes the best of your friends will not be in the mood to want to talk about your dilemmas in life, there are times you didn't feel like doing that too, so forgive them for this. But always appreciate the friendships you have, these will be the people who will help you along the way through the hardships in your life, so be grateful always.
14. Don't hold grudges. You will not be happy if you do so, forgive them and you'll be much happier that you took that heavy weight off your chest.
15. One day boys will give you all their attention and ignore you the next day. And then they will flirt and make you special some more time. This will get tiring with, but you baby girl have the power and right to stop putting up with all their games.
16. Stop waiting for things to happen and enjoy life as it is. Stop waiting for the right moment and just for it. Enjoy the surprises life brings to you because sometimes the most amazing things happen when it is unplanned and least expected.

I don't want to be his five minute cigarette break
I want to be the person he comes to every time he lights up a blunt
I don't want to be drunk with him on a Saturday night
I want to be the person who's there with him when the sunrise is up on Sunday morning and he's still hang over
I want to be the person he drunk calls at four o'clock in the morning when his mind is blurred, yet my name is the first and only thing he thinks about
I want to be the person he thinks of when he is so high and he can't think straight but the thought of my face is always clear no matter where his mind wanders off
But these are just my thoughts when I've already had five hits
As I watched him across the room
He probably had too many to drink and lit up a lot
When he takes his last hit, he smiles at me
And the thoughts I had felt like forever
But only a minute passed by
But when he grinned at me
In that moment I wished it lasted for a long time
He probably won't remember any of this the next day
I know I will

Kiss them once & never let your lips touch theirs
Tell them all these sweet & lovely things, & act like everything you told them was just a lie
Make eye contact with them, but look through their eyes full of regret
See them everyday, pretend they never existed & look right through their souls
Embrace them & then never touch their skin again
Hold their hand & make sure to leave them wanting more
Make all these good memories with them & leave them hanging like the past few months meant nothing to you
Talk to them every day & let them be part of your daily routine, then one day just completely ignore them & never talk to them ever again

Fall in love with someone who makes your Monday's feel like Friday's
Somebody who sees galaxies within you, a world filled with hopes and dreams
Not someone who drowns you to your insecurities and flaws
Be with a person who shows you off to their friends and families
And not hide you as a secret, because your existence is worth showing off for
Also remember to be with someone who values your worth and to cherish every moment of your presence
Who makes everyday a day filled with adventures and entertainment
Someone who's embrace feels like home and makes sure you are secure and safe
A boy who treats his mama with respect
and his little sister like a princess
Because he'll know how to treat you like royalty
Someone who's willing to learn about how much you admire the sky and the stars and the galaxies
Even though he's been living in the shore all his life and the ocean is the place where he's ever really been
But if he goes out of his way to get to know your world no matter how much the outer space scares him because of the unknown and unfamiliar things out there and the fact that he is afraid of heights and falling without no one catching him, that is someone who's worth drowning for
If he is willingly sure enough to do that for you, bring him into your galaxy take him to Mars, show him the moon so he'll finally know the phrase "I love you to the moon and back" is really about
Enjoy every sunset and sunrise with him
Because if you treat a person with so much love and care
Trust me they'll make all your wishes come true as if they were a shooting star themselves
So fall in love with someone who's down to earth
Who appreciates art and nature
Because they'll be able to appreciate you as one of God's loveliest masterpiece
Fall for someone who lights you up just like how the skyline of New York lights up every night
Somebody who is like New York a city that never sleeps, they'll stay up with you all night just to make sure you're alright until you could finally go to sleep in peace
Fall for somebody who makes everyday feel like Christmas morning 365 days a year twenty four seven
Someone who looks at you the way you look at puppies because of how much you adore them
But more importantly fall deeply in love with someone who gives you room to grow and to make sure to not forget to love yourself everyday

She made you her priority
all she wanted was your honesty
you could have also shown your loyalty
but you missed the opportunity
now she's gone for good for treating her so ******
the girl just wanted a little consistency
could have been more heartily
boy all you showed was just atrocity
and you thinking it was some sort of comedy?
that girl has no more patience and generosity
at least what you could do is give her an apology
treat her more equally
act more responsibly
show her some harmony
stop showing her hypocrisy
and maybe, possibly
she'll considerably
forgive you for your cruelty
but this time, treat her more like royalty
she'll be yours significantly

Don't let yourself fall in love with him
When a boy who gives you chills every time he holds you close, shows you his favourite place, don't remember the route on how to get there because when he's gone, you'll only find yourself going back there to get a glimpse of him one more time
Don't listen to his favourite song, for that melody will stay permanent with you wherever you go & the day he leaves you, you won't be able to listen to it without choking
Don't tell him to let go of his bad habits,  for you got your own too
Just because he got this positive mentality about life, doesn't mean he'll be good for you
And just because you two like the same bizarre things, does not make him your soulmate
And when the day comes where he stops putting as much effort like before, don't be expecting so much from him for you'll just be left hanging
Don't watch the stars with him, he'll contaminate it & you won't be able to look at the sky again without swallowing a mouthful of him
Don't let him enraptured you with his lovely compliments, just remember when he's no longer there, that you are beautiful too before he ever came into your life
Just because he promised & tells you that he loves you, doesn't mean he'll stay
Don't let the embrace of his arms be your comfort place, for when he leaves you everywhere you go will just be cold & chilly
Don't let him break your heart, but you're going to let him anyways
And when he does break your heart, you'll feel like you're dying. And it will feel like someone just ripped out your lungs & you won't be able to breathe. But just remember you will find someone better, because you deserve better
You shouldn't have fallen in love with him
-thrcy

I'm deeply very jealous of others girls
with such profound beauty
the ones that can make everyone twirl
that girl who others want to be around with
a best friend everybody wants to have
with just one look at her, she'll leave you breathless
who could overcome any struggles that life has given
ones with a natural giggly laugh
who could pull off any make up
who could make you laugh so hard, that everyone else already stopped
that perfect smile, that could turn your frown upside down
with a unique style for clothes
having such a magnificent personality
smirk on their face, making you believe everything would be fine
ones that could cheer you up and take your sadness away
the girl who could fight the monsters in her head and fight for your sorrows

But I am sorry

That I am not good enough
like those other girls
who could possibly make you happy

I apologize

For being just me
clumsy, annoying, clingy, insecure, imperfect girl
and for loving you that much

and  I  am  sorry

for being so jealous of other girls

Sometimes I feel like we just use other people
to fill in that gap of emptiness
when that special person in our lives
leaves you
and that is why
I can't truly grasp
never one hundred percent sure
I really don't know
if I can ever believe when
people or someone
say to me that they're
into me
or have
true sincere feelings
for me
that is because
what if I am also just a
gap filler?
just a temporary person
just filling in the emptiness
in them

I used to think I was like a starfish
always clinging on to a coral
like how I cling on to people
thinking I always needed them for support

I'd stay near the seashore
waiting for the ocean to take me somewhere new
going on adventures & places to go to
and I thought the Atlantis was the only magical place I could ever go to

But no, I am not just a starfish in the ocean
who seems to be living that easy life
and the sea is not only my limit
because I am way more than that

I am a star
who can get through anything
through night or day
and I remain shining as bright as I can

I've learned to know that there's a whole other world out there for me
the sky is where I belong
venturing through planets & milky way
while I'm accompanied by my friends, the moon & the other stars

While I may be small
but I can make wonders
and hey I'm quite lovely to look at too?
and if you're lucky to come across me, I might be that shooting star

Because I realize I am not like a starfish
for I refuse to drown in an ocean filled with my fears & insecurities
especially to know the fact I can't even swim

I am like the star
a sky filled with wonders & whole kinds of opportunities
I've learned to not limit myself
and I learned to love myself

There may be a billion of other stars out there too
but that doesn't stop me from shining & being who I am
because stars are like people
each & everyone has a story behind them
just like me

So I am like a star
dazzling & bright
and will always be there to guide you
through the night

What happened to originality?
Why you trying to have somebody else's personality?
Can't you get your own speciality?
Copying.
Stealing.
Don't you feel guilty about doing that?
Just stop it you brat.
Doing that so
Makes you so low
For your true feelings you can't show
Because it isn't your work
And what you're doing is acting like a ****
Taking credits for something you didn't do
It's making you look like a fool and you just have no clue
For you're not really real, but a fake
Taking a poem you didn't even make
What a stupid mistake
Makes my head shake
And my whole body ache
Heartless and mean this may sound
But I hope karma gets you around

Don't fall in love with that somebody
He'll take you to parks, coffee shops, & to the ocean shore
He'll kiss you & lift you up with an embrace
At the most unexpected time in the most beautiful places
So you can never go back to those places without tasting a mouthful of him
He'll wreck you in the most lovely way possible
& now you'll know why storms were named after people

What if we're just a gap to fill the emptiness of a person?
A gap that will make them feel like a whole again
A gap to fill in for someone because another human being had tore them apart
And so they feel nothing but numbness because the other has left and has took their heart with them
A gap so they wouldn't feel lonely or abandoned
A gap that makes us feel like we're being used, so that the other person would feel better about themselves
A gap that someone has replaced us with because they've got plans that weren't fulfilled with another

And so I think
Maybe we do these things too
We have this gap that needs to be filled in
So that life wouldn't be so bad as it seems
Maybe we might be using another to get over someone else
Or a gap to be able to move on
But this gap, something that helps us not feel so alone in this world
We all do it and we all have it
And that's just the cycle of life

So what if you're just a gap to someone else?
Maybe they're just a gap to you too?
But it's scary to think sometimes that you might just be a gap for that person, so that they wouldn't feel empty
But that person isn't just a gap to you, they actually make you feel like a whole
And so we move on with life and find someone else to fill in that gap because of the pain of another individual brought upon us

When a wave of sadness, the tides of hopelessness, thunder of my regrets and a loud sound reminding me of my mistakes.
A storm is about to happen and I feel myself getting sea sick.
As always, I hope to survive another hurricane where all my flaws and insecurities collide all at once.

I am sailing through the ocean,  where my destination is finding genuine love and happiness. A place where it may not even exist. I am like a pirate looking for treasure throughout all these years, only to find out that there was no treasure to begin with in the first place.

I sense the disappointment all around me on the sea shore and I swear my tears is as deep as the ocean. And if you ever get to swim through it, you might see my tragic past and sorrows. It remains floating on the ocean waiting for it to wash over me.

I keep writing about you
A lot of people say that my poetry is amazing and I have no idea why they say that
And I think it's because they're all about you, because you're ******* wonderful
But what you don't know and what they have no idea is that
I stare at the ceiling for hours
And my hands can't seem to move
Leaving my pen untouched and just having a blank page
Filled with no words about you or about love
Because all I feel is frustration and disappointment
Maybe I write these things but it actually doesn't come close to how I'm really feeling
But if actions could be expressed into words
I would write about how I should have hugged you for hours and convinced you to stay
How your favourite song just came up the radio, reminding me the first you made me listen to it
I would write about me standing outside the rain near the bus stop, thinking and replaying all the things you said to me, as I hide my tears from the rain
Then I realized I never had you
We were never official
I would write about the burning fire from my heart as it start to burn because of how much I miss you
and how the burning flakes have reached my brain at 3 in the morning thinking about how I miss your voice and how I crave your presence
And then I remember being up so late was only that much fun when you were still around, with our deep talks & late phone calls
I wish every ******* day that you were still here
And I don't know how to end this writing because there is no poetic way to say and describe how I feel so empty and that I just want you back
But what I know is that I'll never let go

This is a deep poem
Way deeper than the ocean
Deeper than that the hole you dug
Much deeper than the hole I dug
Me & you digging can't compare to how deep this is
If everyone in the world digged with us, this poem would still be deeper
A poem so deep that a black hole isn't near close to how deep it is
This poem isn't going anywhere
Because you don't really know where you're going to end up in life
This poem symbolizes absolutely nothing
Because nothing it put together
And this poem doesn't have any meaning to it either
So stop reading this
and go live your life
So you can find a meaning to that
Because you sure won't find it here
Because this isn't a deep poem you idiot

Ever loved and cared for someone so much?
Isn't it so hauntingly beautiful
How they can make you feel vulnerable
Yet they give you such a delightful feeling at the same time
They slowly open your chest
Which leads them to opening your heart
For them having the advantage of
Messing you up
And ripping your apart
And all your life you build all these walls
Protecting your kingdom, which is your heart
By having all these guards to keep you away from heart break
Then one day
One person
Not any different from any other person in this world
Who you did not ask for to come into your life
Just decides to step in
Wanders through your life
Knowing your strengths and weaknesses
Then they become a part of your daily routine
And you give them a part of you
That you never did to anyone else before
You just hand all these things to them
But they never asked for it
Because they did something insane
Like hold your hand or smile at you
Then this life of yours
Your little kingdom is opened
Welcoming them into your own world
Then this place of your own becomes theirs too
And your life isn't your own
Because loving someone will get inside you
Holding you a prisoner
Enrapturing you in every way possible
Letting you have all these emotions
Making you feel alive
Then leaving you in the darkness
And one day
That special person tells you
"I'm no good for you. We should stay friends"
Shatters you apart like a broken glass
A splinter working its way into your beating heart
And it hurts a **** lot
Not the type of hurt you'll get over it soon type of hurt
But a hurt where it eats you inside
A hurt where it rips every part of you
The kind of hurt where it gets into your brain
Making you go insane
But also the kind of hurt where only that one person can fix
And even after they make you feel this way
You'll do it all over again
Because it's worth it
They are worth it
And that is what it means to love
It is painfully beautiful

You know that feeling that everything just seems so right & perfect
Like there's nothing in the world that could go wrong
Because you've got that person
Your person
Right by your side
Throughout anything
And for once you aren't afraid of getting your heart broken
Cause that's something they would never do to you
And that feeling is just so great because you get to share every laugh, tears, dreams, & goals with them
And this time, this time
You know they're not leaving anywhere
So you don't have to worry about not being able to tell them a story because you know you'll have any time of the day to say what you want to say
And they don't mind the quiet silence, they're actually very comfortable with it because the quietest conversations are the best thing shared between you two
Every morning you've got that smile on your face because a new day filled with adventure is awaiting for you
This feeling you can't seem to describe
It's like seeing a shooting star for the first time & wishing for that ultimate wish
It's like watching the sunset & getting mesmerized by the beauty of it
It's like hearing the calming sound that the ocean makes & everything is peaceful
It's like seeing a full moon & everything just seem to bright & full
And for the first time in a long time you feel full, you're complete
And this feeling is happiness
You weren't quite familiar with it
But with you that is what I feel
Everlasting smiles & constant happiness
Being with you is like having the galaxy within the back of my hand
Being with you is having a garden filled with daisies growing inside of me
And with you there is no rainy days, only bright & shiny ones
And I remember someone asking me "what is the most beautiful piece of art that God has ever made?"
"You," I replied.
But then I took it back
Because calling you beautiful would be an understatement
And ever since there has only been happy days

There was a boy
willing to give her all the joy
discreetly trying his best to change for her
and make her feel secure
but deep inside he was weak
his feelings he cannot speak
but he did his best
and held her in his chest
he knew that she was out of his league
doing all he can just to keep her intrigue
but the boy had his own predicament
helplessly couldn't give her all the encouragement
for he cannot prevent
instead he went for it and gave her all the reassurement

Through all their laughs
hardships and humiliating moments

The girl
that didn't know she could make that boy twirl
eventually also couldn't resist
wanting to give him her very first kiss
forgetting about her cruel past
and giving him all her trust
for she had evolved into loving him
thinking her chance were very slim
telling him nothing about her feelings
only if she knew that he thought she was so appealing
she is giving him the silent treatment
thinking this a test for some sort of commitment
now she is constantly ignoring his presence
giving him one word sentence

Both are feeling doubt and insecure
saying how they're not so sure
anymore about their feelings for each other
and how they can't ever be lovers

Now they're back to being strangers
thinking they are better off without one another
their paths never converging
for there are just another unrequited lovers

When you left a part of me was gone, so I looked for it in cigarettes & boys who didn't know my name
2. I still lay on my bed reminiscing the good memories & questioning myself where did I go wrong
3. I thought I saw you from across the field, heart started beating so fast, then I realized it wasn't you, for that boy had wore sneakers that you completed hated
4. I hear the sound of your voice all the time, replaying all the things you've said to me, my favourite one has got to be "I'll never leave" which was the biggest lie
5. I can't speak your name without feeling like I'm choking
6. I shouldn't have mistaken wasps for butterflies.
7. I still feel your embrace linger all over me
8. I crave your touch especially the nights where I feel most lonely
9. I miss you but I'm going to keep pretending that I don't.
10. Wide awake all night, contemplating if I should text you, but then again you'll probably think I'm insane for not moving on
11. I've burned all the pictures & things you've given me, instead I'm entertained of the burning flakes it makes
12. This time I swear I saw you. I knew it was you, because you looked right through me.
13. I think I'm moving on, waking up each day is starting to get easier & every thought of you is just burned into ashes
14. I'll still be there for you, even if you don't want me anymore.
15. I'm begginning to be happy again & got someone new to kiss me good night.

647.086 kilometres apart
6ix all the way to you
6 days since you left
6 minutes to think everything through
6 seconds to let it all sink in
6 months all it took for me

All the time spent together
Blissful memories
Late night talks
Hours of phone calls
Venturing in the city
Experiencing new things
Our long walks
Getting lost in places
Acting like foreigners
That I'll all miss

You're telling me you'll be back in a year or two
You never asked me to wait for you
I was slightly disappointed
But you wanted me to live life
And didn't want to hold me back
We may be six hundred forty seven and eighty six kilometres apart
In my heart there's no distance
For you'll always stay there
This is not the end
I'll see you again
We didn't say goodbye
We'll see each other another time

Rolling a joint was his specialty
Smoking **** was his hobby
Being on top of rooftops was his favourite place to be
A **** is the one thing he always carries
And the lighter is the way he knew he could be away from reality
Even just for a little while

Buying a drink is his side job
Drinking is one of the things he likes doing
Only because it may be an excuse to do reckless things for one night and not being able to remember them the next day
And a hangover is a reminder of how much he had to drink
He does all this because of all the fun he's having

He may be a bad boy
But he brings good intentions

Because really he does all this to making his friends happy
To having fun with them
And of course have a little fun of his own too
Now you can't say he's bad when he's doing all the good deed he can do

Trust me there's more to him than smoking and drinking
He's got that killer smile
That'll make your heart melt
He's got all these witty stories
With a lot of rebellious and illegal things that was behind all of it
But he's got a kind heart
Someone who dearly loves his family
And the most protective brother he could be
The little things brings happiness into his eyes and I swear I think I've seen it twinkle a couple of times
He showed me chivalry still exist
And that there's nothing wrong with having fun just for a while
Even if it can be rebellious
Because he said that it'll be a story someday you'll laugh about
Pretty sure he's got more fire in him than a lighter and I wouldn't mind if I got burned
For he brings fireworks inside of me
Bursting into happiness
For that is what he has shown me
True genuine happiness

He said being sober was his biggest weakness
Not until he met me
Because apparently I make him go weak on his knees
And he says that's why he kneels down randomly for he's thanking God for bringing me into his life
He then said that I brighter than a lighter he would lit up to smoke
He said I am his sun who brought daylight back into his life
And every time he wakes up it's like breathing for fresh air
I bring this fire inside of him
That is filled with passion and compassion
Something he's been hiding all these years
For I have brought it back and gave him inspiration

Little does he know that he gives me inspiration too
The boy who lit it up for me and showed this whole other side of me
I've never been this happy
Right by his side
He said to me that in a long time he didn't mind being sober because I've helped him overcome his fears and he loved living in reality with me better than running away from everything

He'll always be the boy who welcomingly offered with a big smile to join him for a little fun get away
And gave and showed me happiness along the way
Always the lovely stoner

I stare at the moon & the stars
Wondering if you are too
But then I say to myself
You're probably out with someone new
A girl who's got the scent
Of cherry blossoms
And tastes like fresh picked berries

So you're probably gonna distract yourself & try to get the thought of me out of your mind
Trying to concentrate on her but the twinkle in her eyes reminds you of me & so you rush out the door, slap yourself & bang your head on the wall & spit out the words you could never say to me & while you immerse yourself in things I shouldn't even bother to care about I'm here looking at the moon & the stars telling them how much I miss you

And if you do take her out to your favourite place just like you did to me, the moonlight & twinkle of the stars will follow you throughout the night & you'll look over the sky remembering the first time you took me there too, how we shared secrets & stories, & how I almost told you that you were my night sky

So I wish that the light catches your attention instead of her & you'll remember that daisies were my favourite flowers & that you can't get your eyes off the moon

But isn't it funny how empty I am right now because I swear months ago I had the whole galaxy within me  and now I've cried a **** ocean in my body & now I'm drowning
And that volcano inside my chest corrupted when you told me you were leaving and the lavas have
bursted throughout my whole veins
And I had the whole planet within the back of my hand to guide & show you the world
But all that is nothing now because you left & you're never coming back and I'm here a big mess of stormy weather who's gloomy all the time, waiting for a rainbow to come along & see the bright side of things again

It has been six months till I last saw you
Six months till we were breathing the same air
Whenever we were together you somehow always left me breathless
Now that you're gone I feel like I don't even know how to breathe
Even though I've been doing that for the last eighteen years of my life
Whenever I look at the sky it reminds me of you
The stars resembles your eyes
Twinkling and shining
The cotton candy sunsets reminds me whenever you blushed about something I said
And the thing is I will never get tired of seeing the sunset even though I've seen one a million times, just like how I'll never get tired of you
I wanted to tell you this but the other day I went to the beach and I saw the water and the sky touched
For a minute there I felt your presence
I felt you there with me
Us holding hands
Together
I'm not sure where this poem is going but I am hoping it would lead me to you
I hope that for a mere moment we were both looking at the same sky
And I wouldn't feel so alone all the time