is all it is.
My heart is beating
in many different places
There seems to be more than just
10 fingers in front of my face.
In this town,
everybody's too close to tell where you are.
I could think we're standing shoulder to shoulder
when we're really miles apart.
No one knows
where to go.
No one questions
where they are.
Everyone just reaches for the first hand they see,
even for their hallucinations
to help pull them up and out
as they sink deeper into
the miserable little city...
it's a lonely life.
2/24/16- And still, they go back underground again and again.
she wanted to be a man.
She wanted to defy and
the rules that God had bestowed upon
And she did,
at least for a while.
Only a young girl,
he chopped off all his hair
and threw out all his dresses,
thinking that he would magically become
He fooled everybody.
Even I thought he had become
But he couldn't help himself.
The dam had cracks in it
and the water came flooding
I watched as the tears streaked down his face,
leaving irritated, red lines.
Eyes swollen, cheeks puffy,
he walked beside me
as I comforted him with my silence.
Alas, he was only a young girl.
2/22/16- I'm glad this incident didn't change his mind.
under the covers,
with help from the blue light.
And I'm hoping I won't see black
for 8 hours straight.
I'm just hoping
for a dream.
2/17/16- It doesn't mean I got one.
Maybe things are changing.
Maybe everything is a bit more clear now.
The continents are starting to drift away from each other
to establish their own identities,
to figure out who they are, why they're here...
what they want...
who they want.
But there's more underneath the surface
and sometimes people lie,
Maybe the continents will come together soon
But not for now.
But just not now.
2/16/16- I hope soon is in a matter of days.
I don't wanna
stay past the given time,
sing nursery rhymes into a given mike,
entertain kids that aren't mine.
I don't wanna
get on the ladder and never move past the first rung,
grow old and try to act young,
but the kids can't see it, so does it really matter?
I don't wanna
wear a glittery pink beret to contrast my wrinkles,
keep on tying the same balloon animals,
when none of my fans can even read.
2/14/16- But it's something, isn't it?
you've never heard of them.
You'll want it,
but you'll never get it,
none of it.
Invitations to parites,
at a point where no one will hear no.
I'm hitting Paris and Tokyo
all in one night.
Ingredients not listed-
I don't care.
Le'ts drink up,
flush it down with 7-Up,
and throw it all back up.
I see myself on everyone-
you look good on me too.
You'll never see me anywhere
(I'm running around with such and such)
but you'll hear my name everywhere.
Where to did she disappear?
It's clear how easy it is to take in too much.
2/1/16- And yet, we don't stop.
Is everyone else in a relationship except for me?
I walk into Kroger and all I see
are men buying flowers for their wives
and women buying chocolates for their husbands
and I'm buying flowers
for my mother-
my dear old mother
whose husband doesn't believe
in Valentine's Day.
I know he feels the same way as me though.
I know he walks into Kroger as well
and wishes that he hadn't.
2/14/16- I wish there weren't so many flower petals scattered over the conveyor belt.