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We never knew what the future held for us
So we thread this fate with blindfolds on our face
And yet our efforts were never just
We held back our sentences that stayed as a phrase

We never knew if our red string tied each other
We hoped that we would tie the knot together
And yet we knew 'we' won't last forever
In hopes that we would meet in the end, hereafter.

I once knew this girl
Whose name, I cannot recall
Who she was, I was not so sure
But I knew of the tale that made her clocks stall

Walking home that night
The moon on its rising was a beautiful sight
It was particularly bright
Even more when the candles were blown on the street lamp lights

Suddenly its pearl luminescence
turned into a vicious shade of scarlet
I could not make sense of what
was going to happen.

Her arms are spread at her sides like birds' wings high up in the air.
How I wish they were
So she could have escaped the man pinning her down to the ground, telling her not to make any sound.
To his grasp, her strength is bound.
I hear her heartbeats falter with every pound.
The darkness fall over her like a shroud.

In his eyes, I saw a face.
A girl mirrored in the windows of a soul, disgraced.
Suddenly I remembered.
I am her.

His breaths, the sound of his pleasure.
Mine, the cacophony of torture.
He swallowed my screams
like a fine aged bouquet.
He ******* took the light of day, put it into his eyes where I was blinded by the fires that swallowed my vision.
I looked on like I was a spectator in a dream.
My feet lay in one place.
So this is what it feels to be paralyzed
Oh how I wish I could fly

His eyes were void of the abyss of humanity.
Is it a question of sanity?
I would like to think it was
so I would not place the blame on me.

Did I ask for it?
Did I had one too many drinks?
Did I wear the wrong clothes, are they much too skimpy?
Did I choose the wrong time to go out, I should have known it was risky.
Did I even think?
Did I say too much for him to think that I wanted him inside of me ripping skin over and over?
"Be quiet." He growled in my ear
And I obeyed that order
For years and years

My soul, ripped out of its sheltered purity.
My life, polluted with warped imagery of beauty.
My body, never again felt like my property.

As I look at the animal that he is rightfully trapped in his cage,
I felt a twinge of jealousy
for he will be free of his prison, the only thing lost is his age.
As for me, I will never escape the bars guarding my heart.
I will never find a fresh new start.

My words of dissent will always come out as a gust of air just like it did that night.
And now I see a finished sentence.
These words rotting in my throat should be let go of
and it materializes in the form of a question:
When are we going to learn that no simply means *
Sa paningin ko'y ika'y parang santo
At ako nama'y parang g*go
Na palaging hinahanap ang mga ngiti sa mukha mo
Masulyapan ka lamang
Masaya na ako
Ngunit pagkatapos ay babalik din
ang sakit sa aking puso
Wala akong magawa kundi masaktan at magtiis
Kaya ako ngayo'y puno na lamang ng hinagpis
Oo late na ako, nasa piling ka na ngayon
Ng isang taong mahalaga rin sa buhay ko
Kaya kahit anong pilit ko
Hindi magkakaroon ng "tayo"

Sa simula pa lang hindi ko naman ginusto
Na muling tumibok ang aking puso
Dahil takot akong maranasan mo
Ang mga pagkukulang at sakit
Na sinapit ng taong dating minahal ko

Hindi ko naman sinasabing uulitin ko
Ang mga pagkakamaling iyon
Hindi lang mawaglit sa aking isip na
"Paano kung magkulang na naman ako?"

Teka, bakit ba ako nag-iisip pa?
E may mahal ka na namang iba
Sige, hanggang dito na lang ako
Titigil na ako, masaya naman na kayo
Tutal bawal naman "tayo"
Uupo na lang ako
Credits sa owner ng title. Hindi ko alam kung kanino pero thank you
"You know what the sad part is?" she asked as she carefully sips her succulent and aromatic albeit bitter coffee.

"My reflection is more of who I am than the one looking at it," with her eyes brimming with tears, she hurriedly continued, "That and I do not seem to know how to rhyme anymore these days."
Bring her back.
 Nov 2015 Gabriel Nicolo
it doesn't make sense for me to feel this way
because you're not even mine
but i still can't help feeling the way that i do
like i'm drowning and the water is digging into my lungs like a knife
i'm tired of the way my heart wants something that it can't have
making me feel sad at night over things within my grasp
but can't really hold with my hands
 Nov 2015 Gabriel Nicolo
"do not be attached"
I keep saying it to my mind,
but my mind just laughed,
and said
"you keep on saying that,
but you never do it"*
and then suddenly,
I realized,
it is easy to say,
but hard to do...
because, once you get attached,
detachment will leave marks.
You only need your heart broken once
To be able to create a lifetime of poetry
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