Sobriety was easy
When I was broke
When I had money
It became a joke

Fighting my own battles
Living my own personal hell
All the while trying not to hit the bottom
By hitting the bottle
Every sip and drink became a punishment
For all past wrongs wronged
Self forgiveness is for what I longed

The sadness and loneliness was quite unbearable at times
How many wake-up calls would I get?
How many wake ups did I have left?
The best had yet to come and I was squandering it

Drinking my sorrows away at the bottle of a bottle
Was doing nothing but creating more problems
I couldn't fight it

What was done is done
I was no longer forever young
It was time to make things right
This is why I write

The walls we build up around ourselves
With intentions of protecting us
Inadvertently imprison us
Made wary by our own cautions
Afraid to take chances
Never letting anyone in
And never getting out
We have locked ourselves in and away
Our own fears have swallowed the key
With this type of thinking
We will never be free

While it rains
We sit in a window
Looking out waiting for it to stop
Our life goes into a limbo

All this precious time in our lives
We waste on waiting
For something or someone
To happen

We wait for the light turn green
For our laundry to be done
We wait for the over to preheat
Or for reciprocated love

This limbo we live in while we wait
Gives us nothing but grey hairs
As our precious time slips away

Patience is a virtue
When it comes to the right things worth waiting on
But how much time is wasted in that limbo
On things that aren't worth the wait?

It's a fine line
Deciding when it's appropriate to wait
But it's not worth it when we put our lives on hold
With or without patience
We grow old

In the end
We all have an end
How many of your pages are filled with words and events
Instead of ellipses (...) which is
The limbo we sit in while waiting

© Nathan Pival 2016