I hide my thoughts, I hide my strengths.
I carry this disease, the weight of the Holy Ghost.
God, can you hear me? God is missing.

This is it, I tell myself. This is the moment I have been waiting for.
The moment where my colours burst, the instance where the waves crash.
But I am wrong, I cannot move.  It's me against myself.

I can only hope that God is listening.
Is He listening?

(c.m.h)

I remember your eyes in shades of brown,
Blended with a graceless brush
Into painless anonymity.

I remember your hair as a mass of lines,
Ruled and drawn in stuttered strokes
That no longer mean a thing to me.

I remember your smile as a flash of white,
Imprinted upon faded polaroids
In caustic sprays of ink.

I remember the blankness,
The raging torrent of icy fire,
That burnt its way into my soul
With a bitter bite.

I remember the comfort of the floor,
And the echo of the slam,
That's still ringing through my mind.

I contain infinities,
Endless oceans,
Limitless heavens.

I am a meadows of flowers,
Wizened trees bent against brutal winds,
Tempestuous volcanoes and storms.

I am a secret wish whispered at twilight,
A scrap of hope tossed away at midnight,
A blazing dream become reality at dawn.

I contain infinities,
But everyone is content,
When I tell them I am just,
okay.

When I was young you told me not to touch the fire,
Or I would burn my fingers.

That was a long time ago and you failed to warn me,
That people have fire inside their souls as well,
And theirs is more enticing.
It is more dangerous,
Than a paltry candle flame will ever be.