My scars are NOT just scars sometimes they remind me of traumatic experiences.
Sometimes people would stare at them with a look so curious, that I myself, would become furious.
Because my scars felt like a punishment of a series of consecutive jail sentences.
They had me Feeling overwhelmed by weariness
So I put up a fence to hide what I believe was my hideousness.
Then my naked eyes realized the true lies, that behinds these marks are where the truth hides
My scars are NOT  just scars they are Evidence of a Wound, evidence that after pain healing must come soon.
My scars are a sign to show Life was adjusted just as a violin being tuned
My scars are not just scars they show that I have gone thru a Transformation.
My scars are not just scars The give me motivation in my times desperation.
My scars aren't just scars They signify even after my trails, I am Triumphed!
My scars are Marks Of my pass History to celebrate even I was hurt I have the victory! For Greater is He that is within me.
My scars are NOT just scars, they show that God was With me thru it all Truly!
My scars are not just scars they are Permanent sacred Marks Of Beauty.

Im not even going to hid it or fake it.
I Must Admit
I want to see you naked
This is the moment I have awaited
Such a special hour in time so sacred
I promise you no time will be wasted.
Its something I had anticipated.
I hope that you can be persuaded
So I can let you grow to be comfortable enough that you and I can get naked.
But You can keep on all your clothes though.
Im not trying to be no *** bro bro.
But for me can you please Strip down to the barings of your brain.
Take off the window seal of your Pain.
Bare it all; allow me to see every single crack, wrinkle, blemish and stain.
I promise I won't complain.
And Ill let my adoration flow; for you are the earth and I am the heavens pouring upon you my surge of rain.
Let me investigate the very Essence of your Illuminated Soul.
Lets take a stroll
Exploring the mental's temple losing physical control.
Igniting an Radiating glow.
shinning as the intangible spectrum of a rainbow
No longer living in A Shadow
But Being a Royal King and Queen living in The most Elegant Chateau..
Inhaling The Most High's divinity
Traveling The Roads of Tranquilty
Then Exhaling to let go of the epitome of Negativity
Sensing each other's energy
As we enjoy one another's company
While sharing A piece of Serenity.
Let me look deeply inside of your
Our spirits come to be acquainted.
As our human hearts become related.
And Upon your  white anti-blemished canvas My mind was motivated
To ask the question it effortlessly painted;
Do you mind if we can get Naked?

A note of Suicide
The walls were closing in on me.
Frustrated and furious significantly.
A grey cloud of despair, can't you see it in the air?
Where are you right now? You said you would always be there.
As the emptiness filled the atmosphere.
Anxiety grew so heavy and thick.
That I become Feeble and sick.
Overtaken by Outrage
Depression and I became engaged.
The sickness of guilt and shame filled my brain.
I've tried but I can't maintain.
Drunken with Rejection followed by a shot of oppression.
What if something gave me a motive
to end my life without further notice?
What would life be like if I wasn't around ?
would my kids and Family be happy or would they frown?
Living life so miserably
Like an inmate in prison not being free.
Stuck Like a Tree who's roots were intertwined into the ground.
Restricted, bound and beaten down.
I'm locked in.
Life's got me pinned.
I just can't seem to Win.
I'm Feeling like committing an unforgivable sin.
If you're reading this you are already too late
From the Premises of this cold lonely world I had to evacuate.
After so many had me crucified,
Just as my dreams have now so will I,
On the inside, I just gave up and died.
This is a note of Suicide.

Dear Black girl
I love the graceful like movement of which you twirl
You are One of the only Real jewels in this delusional world
I love the Density of your mind and how it adds volume to the thickness of your Beautifully defined curls
I love the way The infinite comic skies glow within your diamond filled moonlight eyes
It’s like Watching the Sun set and Rise
You embrace your Inner G You speak your  colorful native tongue in vibes
So fluently
Pure Energy
You Are A frequency and you flow to the wave of your own ride
Black Girl I love the way your bodacious figure carries that sacred space called heaven safely between your thunderous thighs
I love The way your skin gives life to that blissful Melanin that let’s the world know you were sculpted and crafted straight from the Divine’s hands and placed into the womb of heaven
You are A Joyous Blessin’
There’s No Guessin
A whole Garden, a Goodness Of Perfection
There’s no word or picture that can capture the Power of your Magnificent Essence
You carried this deep within the fibers of your being every since you were just an adolescent
A Temple Of Gold
Walking Tall and Bold
That no naked eye could behold
Just So **** Mesmerizing and Beautiful!
You’ve been chosen from the vine like grapes to unfermented wine.
Never to age but the savoring flavor of your nature’s nectar it just gets better over time!

I dont mean to cause commotion as I am  pouring on you of my waves of emotions flooding your ear's gates like the ocean. Overflowin. But You cast a spell me with your Love potion. You became the only thing running thru my brain in slow motion.
I could see your face, your dimples, your smile, and even the hear tone in your voice with each and every word you had softly spoken.
I was a Good book that you left wide open.
You left me there with my soul exposed and  others to come by and touch my word with their ***** hands as they were groping.
You weren't the person I was hoping.
I was claiming you but you were naming me because I wasn't the one you have chosen. So I sat there in the dark, forced to pick up the shattered pieces of my heart you left broken. And my own self pitty was as a buble bath  in which my crush bones was soaking.
And there I sat with the  bottle from you love potion overdosin.
All it was was an Over do in sin From the beginning, because I knew my love for you was never gonna win. it was  her, her and her, oh yeah all the rest of em.  I guess I wasn't enough for you because  I wasn't one of "Them". So my question is why didnt you just leave me in they zone where I could of just stayed your friend. I thought you were different from the other men. Now I'm sitting here wishing I never would have pressed that little green button on my phone that said, "send". Because you I couldn't  seem to get you of my System, Man I was strugglin. My heart was not  meant to be stressed out like a tree  blowing in the wind.
However you forgot to realize that I am resilient, I don't break, I bend. So I must Say thank for the Inspiration. Cause now instead of running after you it will be my dreams I'll be chasin

"Paradise Wish"

I ambled on the beach to Explore
My bare naked toes touched the gentle waters cascading upon ths sandy wet shore.
As I Inhale the air, the taste was refreshingly pure.
Watching Birds taking flight
And slowly fading from My eye sight

I begun to be Entranced with the Reddish Orange Broad painted Horizon, where the waters meet up with the sun.
I close my eyes as Nature And I grew to be as one.
My soul breaks free and just runs.
My hair sways back and fourth with the coconut trees
My skin Tingles as it feels the cool ocean's breeze,
During the hour of Summer's Eve.

I open my eyes to behold the Golden sand
As it Shimmers like tiny bits of diamonds in the palm of my hand.
And out of no where Comes this Royal looking man,
Grasping a hold of my attention span,
Walking bold and strong like a sound of the drum in a band.

He was tall dark handsome, slim build, with a muscular physique,
I felt his Charismatic ambiance as it loudly begun to speak
Then it caress my forhead and kissed me on my left and right cheek.

And the whiff of his scent was ever so pleasant.
I had smelled an aroma mixture of shea butter and coconut oil.
He had me drunken with the overwhelming sense of being Joyful.
I was surrounded by his presence as I was the flower blooming with radiance and he was my healthy soil.

He was the Ripen fruit specially picked from the grape vine
That look so delectablely divine
I desired to let him Intoxicate me with his  fermented wine.
He Exhilarated me sending chills up my spine.
He Vitalize my mind.
As I left the stress behind, And continue to unwind.

The waters were Groving to thier own beat.
As the ocean laughed at my feet.
The Rippling saphire waves played a song soothingly.
And This beautiful man was being pulled closer to me as if nature took Conplete control over our space of gravity.

The opera of the sea danced all over our bodies and the waves became a tone serene and heavenly.
A Musically fine tuned medlody, like an voila in an orchestrated symphony.
He and I at this moment were ment to be.

My wrist against his veiny wrist
I couldnt resist,
Our tongues Exchanging salvia as they twist.
Who knew our passionate kiss lead to us swimming in the ocean's of love like 2 love making fish.
This is the place my heart longed to exist.
It had me thinking it couldnt get any better than this.

Until I woke up out of my sleep realizing I was only dreaming about my paradise wish.

When I look in the mirror of my reflection,
I see just another human being swallowed up in depression.
When you look in the mirror do you like what you see?
Is the self esteem absentee?
Are you only 5" 3'?
Have the bags under your eyes,
Caught you by Surprise.
Are you having a problem with you weight and size?
Is your extra skin saggy?
Or maybe your stomach is a tiny bit flabby.
Then I looked back at my daughter,
Thats when the tears came running down, and my spirit fought a little harder.
Then I spoke Encouragement to myself and said,
"Negativity and Self destruction, you are dead!"
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
That's what I told her.
Stop trying to let society mold her and control her. Simply love her and walk a little bolder.
Stop trying to recreate who God made you to be.
For he has Made you Beautiful and Wonderfully.
Your Reflection doesn't define you.
For your character and spirit do.
The true beauty lies embedded deep within.
Even with the pimples on your face and chin
Embrace and love the skin you're in.
Healing the disconnection
By viewing Reflections of My Imperfections.

Solitude, silence, peace, and quiet.
Passion, don't deny it, but rather apply it.
Conversations
that leads to Motivation,
requires patience
in complicated situations
with no limitations.
Compassionate with sincerity. Honest and Real covered with purity.
iridescence
is of the essence.
Precious significance in time implanted, in my brain like information saved on a hard drive. Aging like fine wine.
Encountering just a touch of a heavenly place,
Watching the Joy and laughter grow so gracefully upon her face.
Peace and tranquility a place that only seems to exist in the mind,
like a surreal dream captured in a moment thru space and time.
Respect is the detail and reverence  in Honor.
Looking in deep thought, Such pride and beauty that rest upon her.
Cherish is the adoration of treasuring, and protecting something most valuable of great prize.
What lies?
The Beautified feeling of when we get butterflies inside.
Just as the allegiance of obedience is Loyalty.
The king and queen are of authority you make her feel like a lady of such Royalty.
A relationship of deep endearment.
A level of intense intimacy and attachment is what love represents to me.

Scattered Thoughts
Spiritual battles fought
Unanswered questions outlined.
Struggling daily with Battles of the Mind
Mentally twisted and confined.
Trying to Find what on earth is my purpose.
Scratching beneath the surface.
Unearth to know how much much our worth is.
Focus your mental on the fundamental.
Finding potential is very essential.
Although Its not authentic if your heart's not in it.
Having Curious faith in a limitless God
That accepts me for me Imperfect and Flawed
I'm so Amazed and in awed.
When Gods Super collides with your Natural sparks will fly.
For he is the one whom you can depend on and rely.
His word say we will mount up like wings and fly high in the sky.
So at the end of the day To him I mediate and  pray.
He is my lullaby.
Queitly in my bed its Just Him and I
Then puts me peacefully to sleep in the blink of an eye.
In the Morning he plants me on my feet on solid ground to rise.
In His love I became baptize.
So I open my mouth to give him To Praise.
Im just Happy for my savior loving me always.

What is it to have eyes but cannot see,
Ears but cannot hear,
A brain but cannot think,
A nose but cannot smell,
A mouth but cannot speak,
A tongue but cannot taste,
Hands but cannot touch,
A heart but cannot feel......

You can't come to your senses when you are senseless.
Its kinda like being placed in a war blindfolded and left to fight defenseless.
You cant see them when they are coming,
And you dont know where you're going.
You are Slumbering and Unaware that you are existing in a state of being Unconscious,
While The Most High Is Declaring his presence Among us
Once you Awaken to the truth your senses will become active.
Your soul and vibes become attractive
Will Ignorance continue to hold you Captive.
Or will Choose The Divine Authentic Truth That's life changing, Powerful, and massive.

She is A Queen
She's something special, similar to a candy coated dream.
The God in her will sooth you soul as if you were Listening To the sound of the rushing river Streams
Her spirit Shines brighter than a car's high Beams.
Her love is sweeter than brown sugar
And Me oh my she is Looker
Her big chestnut sultry eyes reveals the beauty of Her soul inside.
I can just smell the aroma of her Shea butter and coconut fragranced skin as it glows due to her internal flame shinning within.
Cocoa Brown is the color of her melanated Bronze complexion.
Man, her smile drives me wild.
That luminous smile, her glorious smile, is as gorgeous as the clouds when she shows her pearly whites.
It brightens my day like a lamp in the darkness of the night.
And her mind Is a secret treasure That only her King Can discover and uncover the bountiful mountains he'll climb.
She's Artistic and Musically Inclined
And at the drop of a dime shell bust out in A poetic rhyme
And her words, Gosh her blissfully profoundly spoken words, will send chills up your spine
She's My own little personal ray of sunshine
Radiating truth and her words are so kind
She's simply divine
She's a peacemaker staying serene
From the inside out she is a beautiful Human being
She's good for your mental hygiene
Kinda like how your body needs protein.
Royalty is embedded in DNA gene
And her crown is made of lustrous flowing locks shining like oil sheen.
She is Royalty, She's My sister from another Mister, She is an Unshaken, Strong, melanized Beautiful Queen.

See her as she walks,
Even The manner in which she talks.
She walks boldy with confidence.
She walks awoken with consciousness.
She walks with her head held high as she looks upon Her Father in the heavenly sky.
As she walks by they get one glance into her eyes.
Something that is so unexplainable that they can't began to Identify.
Something that they cant seem to recognize
Its something thats catches them by surprise.
No man can touch the flourishing fruit her of tree.
Its something in her that even a blind man can see.
How is it that she walks and smiles with such glee?
She walks humbly and gracefully.
She walks shamelessly and Courageously.
For She walks Daily faithfully and gratefully with the Almighty.
It happened the day He waited for her so patiently
She came to him on her bending knee to taste The greatness of thee.
His prescence became so contagious
That In her life she made many of changes.
She sought his face Tenaciously
Now In her heart is his place of residency.
Thats why when she walks its as if shes floating so heavenly.
You are seeing the Glowing of Her fathers Spirit overflowing from her majestically.

The love for my Significant other use to be so grate.
I fell in love on the first date
My naive behind thought it was fate.
My heart use to long for Him 'til the dusk of day.
I use to Cry at the very thought of  Him being away,
Our love was as beautiful as the Day in the month of May.

Day and Night For Him I would pray,
That no harm would ever come his way.
And that our love never goes astray.
So they say,
Be careful what you wish for because it just might come true.
Cause now I'm stuck to you like glue
Even though I don't want to
I'm bitter, tired, and now I can't stand you.
For 5 longs years Its been Hell.
All we do is Scream and Yell.
Our business to our friends we tend to tell.
In this relationship we feel like we are both prisoners in jail. And we don't even have a cell, bond or bail. What an Epic fail!
Heated arguments for no reason at all.
Intense feelings, Emotions so Raw.
Shouting and saying things we both don't really mean.
Whatever happened to you being my King and Me your Queen?
We aren't even on the same team.
Someone wake me up from this bad dream.
The love and relationship Can we redeem?
Or are things really as bad as they seem?

Its Pitch Black, so lonely and cold
There's not a single hand here to hold
Nobody Not Even A soul.
Stuck in the deep dark hole.
But I know My God is Still in Control.
As my head begins to pulsate thanks to my migraine Headache.
Just then I faint upon my intake.
Realzing I'm Unconscious, no longer am I awake
I can feel the firery hate in all the words that Everyone had once spake.
Spiteful words glide ****** my mind slithering like snake from behind.
Satans hoping that I might take the bait so he can unwind.
Feelings of being Mistreated and misused
Being Mentally, Physically, and Emotionally Abused.
The feeling of abandonement after being used
In desparate need of someone to talk to
Sinking without you......
I'm lost.... feeling hopeless.....
Lord I cant even begin to cope with this.
Help me to stay postive and gain back my focus.
Father please dont let my prayers Go unoticed.
Im suffering from this massive Heartache cant you feel my heart beginning to break with each breathe that I take.
But it was my Mistake.
Knowing I had Everything to lose at steak.
Now Im Experiencing my life shaking in an Earthquake.
Forgive me Lord I love you with all my heart and soul. Make me whole and console
I know that My God is still in Control.

I shed so many Tears
Especially within these past few Years
I have faced my biggest Fears.
Suddenly I hear 2 different wishpers in my ears.
Satan: "Girl, Can't you hear?“
God: "Have No Fear For I am Here!"
Satan:" You can't and won't Do this!"
God: In all Of This I am In the midst!
Satan: Throw in the Towel,Give up, Quit!
God: You have me and you Are fully equipped, My Child you can make it.
Because I didn't give up I didn't quit. I fought with grit of the holy spirit. And God protected me from Every blow and hit.
This is a spiritual battle From Within......
As Long as God Is on my Side Satan Can't And won't Win.

When the wordly things get all the glory
You tend to live a life that's unholy.
Facing the life's painful reality.
Fight againt wicked principalities
Losing your sense of morality.
As you are procrastinating about Learning your biblical A...B...C's
You are counting up your salary
When you should be counting all of God's promises like 1...2...3..

Thats when it begins to Spread like an deadly ****** transmitted Disease
First its sniffle and a sneeze
Next is a cough and a wheeze
Then you'll Barely be able to breathe
Knocking you to your knees
Begging God, "Please Heal Me"
Praying desperately For His Mercy
Then the STD forcefully will begin to tightly squeeze.
Till it becomes an Infection that attacks your every function flowing like a virus.
This sickness removes the color from life and leave you like eyes with damaged to the nerves, pupil and Iris.
This happens when you Subtract Christ from your life like a math equation involving minus.
Being sticken with this ailment will deprives us, If we dont let Christ take the wheel to Drive and guide us.
This Infirmity is very cancerous  
It will impact your 6 senses Just like the  Symbol for The Eye Of Horous.
Because we are individuals who are like sponges, filled with holes, absorbant and yet very porous.
Beneath the fleshly being lies a spirit
Crying out for help can you hear it?
This deficiency will leave you Shivering from the Chill of it's swift wind's cold breeze
The very thought of this illness makes the soul freeze
Once it realizes it has a contracted a Spiritually Transmitted Disease.

Surrender, Submit & Commit
Just do it and be Legit.
Commit to Yah with your Heart, mind, body and soul.
Let Him take hold and be in Control.
Stop hiding, stop fighting, just Surrender.
Lift your hands and bask in the ambience of His great splendour.
Submit to him full custody
Put your faith and Truth in Thee.
Choose Wisely before you Serve Adonai.
Because you must serve him Spiritually and Truthfully.
Enter into Shalom, no more rigamarole.
The goal is to console,
Renew your mind and be made whole.
Surrender, Submit & Commit
Sit and think on it for just a tad bit.
I hope you can understand these words i spit.
Because its for your benefit.
Take heed to these words and embrace it.
Are you ready to Surrender, Submit & Commit?
Mentally without a doubt
Are you are ready to see what he's is all about.
Gracefully to him bow,
So do it, right here, right now!
Fully give yourself to him, Admit.
Surrender, Submit & Commit.

Thank you for seeing fit to making simple me wonderful and beautifully.
I've left you, walked away.
There were Times when I have forgotten to pray.
I cursed you when trials have come my way.
Forgetting that you were always right there for me.
Waiting with open arms so pure and holy.
This is what I call a true love story.
The Evidence is in your majestic glory.
Thank you God for eyes to see as I look around and take in your artistic creativity.
Look at The birds and the bees
Even The sun, the moon, the stars, and  the trees.
Thank you father for separating the land from the sea.
Thank you for sending Jesus to dying upon the cross so we might have life more Abundantly.
But more most Importantly
I Thank You God for loving little old me Unconditionally.
Thank God for who you called me to be.
A woman who's motherly ears hear the sound of her child's cry as thier life I bare.
Thank you Father for my ears so that when you call upon me your voice i will hear.
When I felt alone your presence filled the room to let me know you were always right there.
There was a sudden shift in the atmosphere.
Even when I felt so far away from you you were always near.
Thank you catching the rivers flowing from my face called tears.
Thank you for these past 28 adventurous years.
Thank you bringing me thru the struggle,
You never gave up on me no matter how many times I would fall down or buckle.
Thank You Father for a mouth to speak.
So when I became weak I use this technique; I fuse my mouth and heart together so in you I will seek
To gain strength in my spiritual physique.
Walking with you I am constantly being critiqued but thats what sets me apart and makes me uniquely mystique.
Thank you Father for my brain so I can think.
Giving me the power to move my body and be able to blink upon instinct.
Together My brain, heart, and mouth become in sync,
Then the physical can develop into one link.

Just Experienced a Spiritual Cleansing
Even those wicked ideas that entered my mind from the very begining.
He purged me from my awful ways of sinning.
He purified my mind and changed my way of living.
Time to do The correct Thing.
Live My life pleasing my My Heavenly King.
So Yahweh take this of words as a symbolic form for a wedding ring as my offering.
Inhale........
Exhale .........
Ahhhhh Refreshing!
Professing and Expressing all the many marvellous blessings.
Just being in his extended arms of caressing.
Towards the mark Im suppressing
Suggesting that Im Progressing.
Yahweh you are the best thing.
Its in you that I find my nesting.
You are The wind beneath my wings
The lyrics to the songs I sing.
You are my Everything
You are is My Identity
Your spirit fills the inside of me.
There is No one Greater
Than My Magnificent Savior,
You are My Wonderous Creator
You are the air That I breathe.
My thoughts before they were conceived.
Your love is so soothing,
Theres evidence of you moving.
Abiding in me ruling,
The reason why my soul is healing.
What a wonderful feeling!
Intertwined with spiritual insight
So Majestic, Golrious with Delight.
I Thirst for wisdom being quenched
From the moment I fell in love with you it all made perfect sense.
The more Time I spend in your presence
Im am convinced
That you gotta be Heaven-sent.
Ive never felt this real and so intimate.
So this relationship must be legitimate.
You took me out of my element.
Digging deeper into the old and new testament.
Like a camera you used the negatives for my development.
You gave me a new diet a new regiment.
Showed me Compassion and love, you are very affectionate.
Thank you For my getting me thru my 3 prerequisite:  which is Being Real, Being Righteous and Being Relevant.
You shaped me draped me into a modern day woman of Proverbs 31.
Im forever grateful for all that you have done.
Ill try to do my best not to break our spiritual covenant for with that comes an eternity fire of suffering and punishment.

Like a grain planted into the ground I will be sowned,
So the produce from my seed will be grown, and Thru you My fruitful offspring will be shown.
I cant be bought so Im no one's to be owned.
Im like no other you have ever known.
I am good for you like the sweetest cantaloupe and honeydew.
I cling to the blades of your grass like the  Morning's due.
You are the canvas and I am the brush with my kindness I paint you as the serene skies a beautiful hue of Indigo Blue.
I am Honesty, Pure, and true.
My life I gave just so your soul I could save
For you, I the faced death so brave
Yet you barely desire me, not even so much as a crave.
This not just for Show
I want the whole world to know
I care for so.
You are in debt to me and Your heart is what you Owe
Some would want to put me on display like a family portrait hanging from a frame.
And like luggage many have tried to have me bagged, tagged, and claimed.
Some tried to condition me but couldnt even have me maintained.
Too many Put me in a straight jacket and had me restrained.
So Like water being removed from a fountain they have left me Drained
Making a mess of me like red wine spilled on the carpet I have been Stained.
Like a sword that pierced my side I endured your agonizing pain.
Hand in hand I walk with you even in shame.

But you say that Im the one to blame
When indeed I only came
Because it was you who called upon my  name
You traded me in for fortune and fame.
And My Darling my compassion for you is still the same.
My affection For you never changed it will always and forever remain.

People will say that they regret the day we met.
Just because they see themselves like a butterfly trapped in a net.
Having an enclosed mindset.
Not realizing you need me like a pet needs its Vet.
The rejection and pain you've experienced you will soon Forget.
I can Cleanse you without ever getting you Wet.
Its a process and im not finished with you yet.

Im am beyond your control,
I came embedded into your soul
Taken your Brokenness to make you whole

Swallow me like a pill,
be still and allow me to do my will.
Ill give you the strength to climb even the steepest hill as I pour my spirit into you like an empty cup to fill,
Just for assurance sip me and taste and see That I am real.

As you sit back and reminisce,
Are you drowning in life's Abyss?
Wondering if something so beautiful as This Can really truely exist
Moving you in a state of bliss, interlocking with our souls first kiss.

I fit you like a glove,
I fall on you like rain from the heavens above
My presences is engaging and graceful like a flying white Dove.
Hello name is love.

When Im feeling like a Neglected Soul
The Presence Of The Most High Becomes Increasingly Mighty and Bold.
The Holy Spirit becomes So Strong that  My Flesh is overthrown and it knocks me Out cold.
I'm no longer in Control. The Messiah Overtakes and has a hold.
Upon entering into a Stillness
And Engaging at the Beauty of such realness
I can hear and feel this.....
Pure Silence, Peace and quiet.
Encountering this blissful moment in private.
In this place of dwelling
Here,  His grace and mercy is never failing
Here, His Unconditional Love abides
A place where Only God Resides.
A spiritual Realm
where in your loving arms is the Only place I can be found
Where I can leave behind the world and worries and enter into The Great escape.
In your spiritual agape, You My potter, mold me into shape.
This is a place that is hidden
Beyond Earth in another dimision
Even with my eyes Closed He still gives me vision.
A place where I'm drifting thru time and gracefully floating space.
This is our secret Place.
The place where I am safe and secure.
Now realizing All the Things I had to endure was for my personal growth so I could Mature.
Dimishing my mind and heart of the stress
Casting all my cares upon you in Exchange for my Rest.
You took away my brokeness
in exchange for soulfulness and wholesomeness.
Surely I am Blessed.
Happily, I give you Gratitude and Thankfulness!
Yahweh Is The Best.

Shining in the shadows of the night
Radiently glowing like a Nothern star at Twilight.
From the darkest thickest mud of nature I rise
Seeing how I grow is a element of surprise
thru the Human's naked eyes
Im surrounded by the troubling waters
And yet my pedals dont get wet.
Once I take a deep breathe in
A New adventure will soon to begin
As I let my life unfold
Look at The Beauty of Yah's Work, Behold.
Standing tall, so beautiful and Bold.
Shimmering like nuggets of Gold.
As still as the sight of Winters beauty, So Cold!
Beyond the grandeur of my splendor is a story left untold.
Breaking out from the Dimness of the gloom
Becoming Like a lotus flower to blossom and bloom.
Breaking thru from the darkness of my past.
Thank Almighty I am free at last.
In my yesterdays I was a caterpillar and Today Im a butterfly
Metaphorically speaking the new me is living so the old ugly me had to die.
Like water is to the body being washed clean I am purified.
Positioned like a Tower.
Inside Lies Source of Power.
I have a soul of the lotus flower.
Im not the one to use a cliche
But on this very Day I can feel your vibes coming my way As I close my eyes and bow my head to pray
To you all who reading these words Namaste!

Has the close of day ever have you morph into something you were not meant to be as if you were Optimus Prime.
And The darkness strikes you like Evening skies strikes the earth at 9.
And like a scared baby you whine?
And you become Depressed like a prisoner who screams for help from the bars they are locked behind.
Trapped in box space in a moments time whose senses are growing blind as The negative thoughts chills the spine.
Dont be The Inmate Whose thoughts put you in a place to be confined.
Go to Your that happy place In your mind
and Reverence The One Who is Truely Divine in that peaceful place of Shrine.
Because The battle for right choices begins in our minds.

Have you ever felt so volatile
That you would beg God take your life Right here right now.
Struggling to stay postive but you just dont see how.
Life hits you with a Right hook, next a left hook, then shoots you 2 twice, pow pow.
Then you start Thinking to yourself, "Man Wow!"

As I look at my life I see nothing but shame and dishonor.
Father,
So many negative thoughts I Ponder
Then my mind begans to wonder.

Drowning in my own brain I became obstuct like i was sitting in the car, in the middle of a traffic jam, just stuck.
Down on my luck.
Fear and doubt would aggressively poke
And depression begun to grab me by my throat and I would violently choke.
In my tears i would soak because my wicked ways left me dead and broke.
I went astray, knowing that for my transgressions I would have to pay.
No matter what trials came my way.
I foughter harder and harder every day
So Finally I got on my kness confessingly  I begun to pray.
Because my Spiritual Corruption lead me on a path of destruction.
So my life had to be taken in an abduction So I could hear God clearly when he gave his reintroduction.
From then on, Living to serve God became my function.
The Father, The Son, And the Spirit and I became 1 supernatural junction.
Now Im a believer Under construction.

I've accepted the Conversion.
Because I Know he Exist For Certain.

Suddenly my life started changing.
Order took place as things started rearanging.
Like clay in the hands of a potter he started molding and shaping me.
Remaking me a version of authenticity!
I share his truth declaring it with audacity, as he helps me walk according to whom he has predestined me to be.
Like an athlete going through reconditioning
My spiritual man is quickening.
My soul begans to Awaken.
With each biblical reading I take in.
There is healing from within.
It so Intoxicating like a kiss to the skin.
Just being cleansed from sin leaves you feeling Invigorating.
Going through this modification Ive seen much alteration.
God has remove things with the process of elimination.
Just as a butterfly going through metamorphosis is lesson in grade school education so is a spiritual journey of Transformation.
I'm becoming believer In Formation!

Just Venting....

I feel stagnant and fear has become my magnet.  I'm tired of him and he's tired of me. He continuously drains me of my positive energy.

In just a few moments like I was counting from 1 to 3.
And just like that we went from Ecstacy to agony.

I feel everything from everyone and yet from my own feelings I feel Numb.
my heartbreaks, with every breath that I take..... my struggles....., my fears......, and doubt's shout! They are more bold now than ever.

I swear you're just like a pill instead of making me better you keep making me spiritually ill.
I wish my Empathic ways would turn off and go numb so that my heart and soul could no no long feel.
Yet and still, I trust my intuitional forceful power inside of me to know what I feel Is real.
Because  that's one of the powers given to me by the God of Israel.

So Tell me Is it my peace and happiness you are here to steal?
As you Leave me empty like a cup that needs a refill.
And Your words beat me like I am Emitt Till until your energy becomes a ****** weapon  licensed to ****.
Ha! Ha ! Ha ! You must get a thrill
About how you make me feel
you leave me broken with blood pouring on the ground like red juice from From a cup that leaves behind a stained spill.

Some call it a relationship but I called it a situation ship because the only time we can relate is when we situate our feelings long enough to ride the lustful seas with our maghony ships flowing from the currents between our hips.
Then once that's over again you have the nerves to abuse me from the fruit of your lips  
And like fool I continuously drink your poison as I entrancingly take sips.

While as writing this did you sneak and poke holes and then dip? Because this is the sound of a sinking ship.

Until the death of me, will have you strangled like A MC on the mic that he/she grips ready to spit their rhymes ever so slick.
Weighing heavy on your soul like the Weight of a thousand bricks.
Making you feel so sick
You'll be needing some Vicks
And things in your mind will begin click
As the memories of me will beat your brain blow by blow with every single lick.
Remembering when you called me B*h and that I will never be sh*t
the words and images of how you treated me will haunt you like how that ghost is watching you in as it sits
As the time passes and the clock  just ticks.........

I must Confess,
I am Baring witness to the beautiful sight of your nakedness even though you are physically and completely dressed.
Its such a sight to behold as you bare the essence of your soul, revealing it uncovered and undressed
Now I have you right where i want you with Your heart under my arrest.
So come lay your Kingly crown upon my chest As I caress you with my love and tenderness.
Listen to the rhythm of heart beating like an African drum, *** pum pum pum pum.
Feel my Energy impermate your atmen flowing thru all of you, from me.
Here in this place is where we meet, its that place of serenity.
While you Delight in my words as they gently kiss your ears.
Let me Take my pencil and an Erase all your fears leaving behind not a single trace. Only a smile upon your face.
Allow me to take these soft delicate hands to massage the beatings your masculine stallion body you had endured today
each touch Is like fire to ice melting all of your stress away.
Now we can sit here in silence mediating thru out the day. King to Queen Nasmaste

I Fully comprehend what they mean by the struggle is real.
My true self is what I tend conceal
Afraid of what I feel
And lately it hurts as I began this process to heal

It's my pride I wish would die along side with the plenty of tears I cried
Its the chambers of secrets that silences My truth I tend to hide
Its the bottled up emotions that internally lie.
Its the unheard voices on the inside

Its the toxic and venomous things I can do without.
Its the violent roars from the untamed screams and shouts
I breathe in, and I  breathe out
I'm letting it go, I'm letting it all out
Then I sense the spirit of nature surrounding and filling me all about

Its what my mind perceives as pain that  My soul and body feels, embraces, and dances in the midst of the storm's rain
As it cleanses and purifies my lower self composed of dirt, blemishes, and ****** tainted stains.
Its all about the experience of learning, character building, and strength to help me sustain.
Because one would never know joy without pain, or sunshine without a little rain.
And now I'm alive again With Gold,  Royalty, And Power Flowing through my veins carrying microscopic Intellectual messages to and from my Renewed brain.

I see you as you're watching me
Catching every detail as you view so carefully.
Your eyes are glued to my every move as you observe so attentively.
Everything I do and say
you study it throughout the day.
You see Me when I cry
Even when you try not to pry.
When the tears begin fall and You're asking me, "WHY?
And mommy please don't lie.
There's something wrong and this you can't hide."
So this was my Reply,
"My life feels like a pigsty
no matter how hard I tried.
Times when to you I just try to advise and emphasize
not taking the time to understand how you feel inside.
That's why we didn't see Eye to eye and  I always ended up feeling like the bad guy.
Sweetie pie,
your behaviors I cannot justify
but there are Rules and regulations that we must abide by.
On me you must rely
No I don't have the answers to everything
But this much I can testify and bring
all I have is my heart and love as an offering.
I pray that You love me just as much as I love you.
There's so many things that I've gotten use to that you have seemed to outgrew.
There's things that I'd wish I could undo.
So many things I want to tell you.
Things we haven't even gotten to do.
Our love has been proven to be tride and true.
***, I Need a tissue
I think we just had a breakthrough.
Because the bond between you and I is better than Wi-Fi.
This much I can verify
That Mommy loves her little ones, all you littles wise guys.
I love being being a mother fervently
Because you guys bring out the best in me.
Personally,
I enjoy watching you watching me so
Observantly.

You make my soul dance
You leave me in a trance by our Romance
Drench me in Translucent Love like a Shower
Purify my being by providing me with Strength and Power
Quench my thirst for I am your beautiful flower
Dance against my body like sapphire ocean waves
You are the very subtance my soul craves.
You surround and worship me as if my body is temple of praise.
Revitaling my mind leaving me feeling refreshed and amazed.
You saturate my ***** coils
You Sprinkle me like a plant in the earths soil.
You Soak my honey suckle melanin
you enchance the beauty of my skin as it glistens.
You soothe my very essence as I listen
I wish to be a river otter That way I would always be near you.... Water

What is Love?
Can you see it? Is it an action?
Can you sense it? Is it a Compassion?
Could it be A warm kindness that soothes the soul's satisfaction.
Or It could even be Intensely deep feelings of affection?
Is it Adoration? And Must it be taken in moderation.
Is it just a sensation from one heart to another to Place in.
Or idolization of infatuation?
Maybe just a fragment of attachment.
Upon a moment's first glance,
does it becomes a chance for romance
that makes heart wanna flutter about and dance.
Love is a ministry
Its covers a multitude of iniquity.
Love has the ability to care unconditionally.
Love lives inside each one of us, you and Me.
For God is love and Love is God.
Love conquers all against every odd.
We are suppose to Love and serve one another.
So spread to your sister and your brother.
Love is the only way to stop hate.
Let hate evacuate
So you can allow the love Of The most high permeate.

I am amazed at the beauty of the earth's Glorious wonder
As I sit in silence and ponder
I look up to gaze at the wide blue yonder
As the Golden glow of light appears upon the glittering water
The Sun bathes the earth
Showing all of humanity its worth
I was embraced by nature's peace and serenity
Feeling free like nothing is holding on to me
While I was captivated by this breath taking scenery.
And Through The warm grained sand I waded
Until i found a spot where I could relax my mind and let the stess of life become faded.
Feeling elevated
The Divine spirit left my soul impermated
With the sensation of Feeling exhilarated.
And then I felt Something dustrub my tranquility
Over taking the peaceful canvas indefinitely
Its almost as if the Sun fearfully hides behind the clouds that surf across the wide gloomy skies
And Darkness overtakes the light.
As if all suddenly the day immediately turns to night and my soul is filled with anxiety and freight
The Thick black ominous clouds were bellowing in from the east and west.
And I could feel my heart rapidly beating from the middle of my chest.
The thunder roared
As the The rain heavily poured
the lightening struck the sky furiously.
Almost as If God Spoke Angrily.
As I just prayed Softly
The wind Howled like wolf
Then the wind Swirled around and around from the sky to the ground
like a child first leaning how to draw with a crayon and scribbles away
Drawing in a circular motion leaving behind smudges of grey.
Its a storm brewing in my pathway
Do I stay or run away
His road seems a little rocky
But I just wanted to speak life joy and peace into his cold heart and body.
But I never knew he would leave me in a state of being melancholy.

This Tornado is on a Rampage of Destruction
Making it hard for my brain and heart to properly function
This Disater paralyses me and knocks into a concussion.
I thought I heard his voice and mines fussing
But it was My heart, my soul, and my brain that were having a discussion
Leaving me in the blank space where all I can hear and see are all the thought in my head that were rushing.
I went numb feeling Nothing.
Entangled and trapped in his gravity.
Being drained ny his bad engery.
This is what it happens when our 2 worlds collide.
My happiness, my joy and strength has just died.
As the tears turn into a river streaming from my face That I cried from keeping all theses Emotions bottled up inside.

With you I am bitter cold and bleak
Without you I am creative and mistiquely unique.
Without you my brain operates on a level of an Intellectual Geek.
But when you  are around Im feel like climbing a mountain thats too far way and too steep
That I give Up climbing because of the pain in My knees, my legs and my feet,
My soul cant breathe and heart and mind become feeble and weak.
Without you I am Strong enough to conquer any mountains peak.
But with you i feel Rather incomplete.
But without you im Woman of Proverbs, A portrait resembling one who is humble and meek.
But with you The cat has my tongue so I cant express What Im feeling through the words I speak
Is it my demise what you seek?
Without you I feel put together and kinda neat.
With you its hard too feed my spirit what it needs to eat.
But without you It like Just another sad love song on repeat.
With you I feel im at war and your personal gain is my defeat.
Without you its hard sometimes, kinda of bittersweet.
But with you all I feel alone and in behind my smile I weap.
Without you my transcendent self can't seem to find sleep.
I guess the capicity of my love maybe just a little to deep.
Maybe You should learn how to swim because you sow what you reap.

I use to be all about you.
Like everything I say and do needed your approval or had to have value.
Until the day I found out you didnt love me the same I once loved you.
Then my heart became like a freeze color of blue.
I felt like i would be lost without you, I cried Whats a girl to do?
I felt stuck like an animal trapped in the zoo.
Until I changed My perception and started seeing things in a new view.
I had to tell myself you know I matter, Im Important too.
That was just kinda a clue
That its time to move on boo boo!
Its hard to be with you but I think its better to be without you

Just when you think worry and fear will always be there
This is what you should be mentally prepare
W.O.R.R.Y

Wandering aimlessly
Obessional overthinking
Restricted &
Restained
Yielding to the mind, the thoughts in our brain.

You cannot say you have faith in The most high and worry.
Maybe your sight is off and your vision is just a little blurry.
Worry is a slight stumble in your walk of faith. Faith is trust. Have Faith and believe is a must.
Trust is having the ability to stand firmly in The assurance of someone or something with absolutely certainty.
Worry limits your endless amount of Possibility.
I hope you are listening to me.
A faith defined by worry is an immobile one.
Worry can be a bullet in a loaded gun.
So Dont worry for Worry tiggers fear.
Fear that you have you feeling like the End is near.
F.E.A.R.

False
Evidence
Appearing to be
Real
Fear is unreal just abunch of emotional turbulence we feel.
Dont fear hurt because you would never know comfort.
Fearing is something we need to abort.
Dont fear Pain. Because pain bares strength.
Dont fear being broken because you would never know what is feels like to be made whole.
Dont let fear be In control
Dont fear falling because it gets better when you arise.
You will be suprised Once you think and realize.
Dont fear rejection for Its Yahs Guidance and redirection.
Just keep yourself deep in the truth.
And try your best to learn from your mistakes so we can help redirect our misguided youth.

I Solemnly Swear
No else would ever come close or ever compare.
To your unconditional Tender love and care.
Unaware that my hearts under repair.
Im Mentally Gone but Physically There.
Could this be a Secret love affair?
Can't you sense the attraction in the atmosphere?
maybe its in the confidence that you wear?
Because Out of the corner of my eye
One day you caught me by suprise
I think you could be my angel in disguise
All in my feelings, you Got me over here mesmorized.
The Presences of this King was Strong and So bold.
With Such beauty my vision could barely behold.
Truth Be Told,
You precious to Me, more valuable than Gold.
From that moment on I knew you already had my heart sold.
Something intrigues me to you.
Is it because you are Respectful, Honest, and True?
Maybe its in reference to the little things you do.
You are Something so Extraordinaire
Hard to come, So Exquisite and rare.
Even when I'm broke you got me feeling like a multi millionaire.
You give me butterflies.
Got me floating like the clouds above in blue skies.
Having vision about you and I
Becoming as One and Unify.
You as my King and Me as Your Queen.
You are the drug and Im the Fein.
I need you so bad I could scream
You are surreal to me like a dream.
You set my heart on fire.
With a passionate buring for desire.
My Confession is I sit here secretly watching you and Admire.

Sincerely Your
Secret Admirer.