#went
Self harm is not only cutting it’s hitting and biting and burning and hurting your self but mostly cutting people think hurting them selfs is better than getting professional help in reality it’s worst your wrist are covered with cuts from self harm this is why you should get professional help some people can’t get professional help because they don’t want their parents to know and that’s understandable but at least have someone to talk to and if you don’t always text me x
Apr 21
Apr 21, 2026 at 6:19 PM UTC
i'm tired of singing the blues, for everytime you leave me
tired of saying it's fine, don't you worry about me.
i'm fine.
Apr 28, 2021
Apr 28, 2021 at 6:28 PM UTC
The tip,your taste on tempted tongue,
The haste, the hover, the hungry one.
I live, I last, I love, lament,
I walk and wonder where our love went.
Nov 1, 2020
Nov 1, 2020 at 11:46 AM UTC
it’s november when
the meds kick in, it’s
december when i feel
human again. (or maybe,
for the first time?)
i lack less.
found an appreciation
for something or another
dug up in the front yard
by a half-blind dog.
appreciation for
the living
and the
quiet
small
moments.
i used to know empathy,
used to take her hands
between mine in
cut scenes
but those were
trembling eras
of seconds,
caught between
an intensity i’ve since
given away.
an inferno.
of being
in love
with
wheat
grass bet-
ween
high
ways
and
last bit
of clouds
eating sun
like nectar
in the rearview:
or sweet talking
directly into his eyes
at midnight, hearing
a smile in the smoke
that separates our
houses.
cats with twigs
and dirt swimming
in their bellies.
ghosts in the
woods beyond
my car,
yowling at
the full moon
as if they
were born
to.
i now know
the silence and
warmth of
sleep.
i exist alongside
unfamiliar calm,
a quaint silence
that does not
burn at the
touch.
but
the world is
almost softer
almost
lighter --
my skin is
held to-
gether
with
some
thing
more
than
glue.
(maybe
stitches?)
i wonder
if i was
human
the whole
time.
May 2, 2019
May 2, 2019 at 2:55 PM UTC
getting high without you isn't even getting high,
just feeling down because i know i'm at my lowest point.
Feb 24, 2019
Feb 24, 2019 at 11:22 PM UTC
Mach my words, that time travel aye
foresee (rather than being
at a stand still, nee frozen
analogous to cry
oh ja hen nicks, or more particularly
going backwards)
this chap doth espy
great breakthroughs,
asper similar advances this guy
i.e. myself witnesses quantum leaps I
learn (reading The University Of Penn Gazette)
the Burmese doctoral
engineering student Kai
Sir Von Wilhelm Harris
made profound advances within
advanced combined research
laboratory of rocket surgery
and brain science set my
mouth ajar
(with rivulets of drool spilling forth)
constructing a simple
to assemble gizmo (avail able
common household materials
rendered unto YouTube), and/or Cable
Comcast, Fios, Infosys, et cetera
which accidental discovery
automatically codified feign
top secret "FAKE" news to enable
boot (simply for formality sake)
code named Clark Gable
yet in reality (a faux veil of secrecy)
to con Vince sing lee
foster an inimitable
mystique, button truth
for general public to unzip noble
no red bull) knowable
handy escape to past or future
and essentially unlocked laudable
simple "household solution"
to become the latest craze
(synonymous with an ****** - manageable
minus addiction, conviction,
and excruciation viz zit operable
via needle marks of the masses
within a fortnight necessary
supplies sans quantifiable
while Das Donald Trump
could enact legislation satisfiable
knowing majority being
totally tubularly oblivious unalterable
measures permanently infringing on inalienable
rights such as life, liberty
and the pursuit of winnable pacification.
Mar 23, 2018
Mar 23, 2018 at 2:20 AM UTC
literary food for thought.
Self Mutilation
(ah bet thar iz an app for that!)
within unlit partial "FAKE abattoir"
sans wardrobe alcove
where dust bunnies didst allures
completing a simple task among
my never ending (Matthew's) list
of domestic chores
this undertaking engaged
thankfully while completely clothed,
and scrounging on all fours
nonchalantly picking up scattered detritus
including food crumbs
potential critters hors d'oeuvres
the spouse (ideally seated
on this same swivel chair
dashing off these lines
linkedin with this Macbook Pro) -
housing at least four scores
of word documents, she espied
the cheeky opportunity
that triggered many wars
within arms length the taut outline
of me 'lil derriere - re: rear end
temporarily dormant versus
when flatulence roars -
posterior flank hie
could not de fend
she playfully poked her finger
that didst dis send
within close vicinity of sphincter,
where ****** turgid business height tend
(most likely this husband not alone
getting ***** twerked) inn me own coal
less cents great movements got made
jabbing ma **** hole
while i happened
to be "blindly" groping
upon darkly cutout cubby hole
i.e. without wearing bifocals/ spectacles -
envision a human mole
thus amply qualified her role
to be literal and figurative
pain in the *** vole,
where much to my horror a flash
of red hot poker blind
momentary rage, did lash
out at me, when aye espied
a kitchen knife and acted rash
(how cutlery got in closet floor
a minor mystery
and potential topic de jure
for another poem)
to brandish sharp edge
around abdominal area
grabbed handle with left hand,
thence commenced to slash
rhythmically thwacking
wrist of right hand
then quickly dropped sharp implement
(as like a man momentarily possessed)
before rendering permanent harm
with a river of blood to wash.
Feb 3, 2018
Feb 3, 2018 at 2:10 AM UTC
Childhood Campy Chimera Curtain Call
Arctic bitter dead of winter cold
polar vortex deep freezes each lovely bone
excellent existential prized memory
swimmingly recalls boyhood
listening to drone
of various and sundry
en deer ring fauna
extant amidst greensward,
where imagination hath flown
to imaginary Eden lifting
uber a maize zing ears
cocked towards
Mother Nature's petsmart crafted chorus
flushing out soundcloud
queen of happy campers
with bees zee winged
wonders as they hone
suite tracks unstinting
well crafted aural presentations
intended to entice
a mate opposite jejune
targeting their search
nsync with one or another
favorable counterpart, this buzz zing
destiny could favor a loon
or some other apropos biological entity
(or perchance if desperate to mate) **** sitter
another species including the manifestation
of microbes on the moon
whereat boys and girls bounding,
exclaiming, and yelping
joie de vivre asper when counselors
blow whistle call at high noon
hour of day iz lunch, thence resuming
their made up fun and par lore games
such as knight in shining armor
dashing off to save
damsel in distress signaling
sans SOS and favorite ring tone tune
of potential prince
where young love doth Flickr
oblivious to a similar situation, aye lichen
to avast Marcy's playground
such panoply a prediction
forecast by Doctor Punxatawney Phil
a blue oyster cult meme burr
thus, in lay person terms
six more weeks of winter for 2018 -
so stay warm to stave off feeling offal
bodes ill for species who clamor for warmth -
supposed tell tale shadow
spelt "N+I+L+L"
and remain in hibernation
if opportunities allow,
and be thankful for not bing forced to mill
around seeking warmth
(case in point a street person),
but ye and the big or 'lil
body of warm flesh adjacent to thee
(this day and age -
gender preference a moot factor),
or take stock, stock and barrel,
how other creatures great and small
burrow underground under a hill
or reef amphibians, mammals, reptiles...
instinct can remain 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea
a fictitious place evoked by Jules Verne,...
hm...maybe he might breathe
courtesy of an atavistic gill
who would downplay brouhaha
to avoid any cavil.
Feb 2, 2018
Feb 2, 2018 at 4:02 PM UTC
prior to passing thru ****** buck naked bare
this grandson of Aaron, the sole heir –
foreshortened to Sol Aire
evinced (as shown via ultra sound),
which at birth became crystal clear,
an obsessive compulsive prone
human being, endear
ringly cute as a baby monkey possessed fear
some countenance tipping the scales needled gear
greater or lesser than seven pounds
(minus or plus a few ounces)
with a mass of dreaklocked hair,
otherwise a gangly sack of many a lovely bone,
whereat obstetricians
could not help himself but jeer
thus upon exiting birth cana;
found him twirling loose
***** follicular fibers accord
ding to medical records,
a combination of his being bored
(with a really lee super strong arm penchant)
to sport dreadlocks, tough as hemp cord
an anomaly, which no app could com pare,
boot nonetheless highly adored
resembling inimitable indestructible filaments,
when taut could lift off the ground a board
dillow, which no reference manual could address
even topnotch experts queried, could not explain
outrageous constituent rare
lee if never seen before, though still insured,
a novel boot nada so critical freak of nature ma lord
hirsute component part in a triple tier moored
substantial pressure upon the head,
entwining, looping, spilling somehow
interweaving umbilical cord
into a mass of whirled wide webbed wear suitable for
four seasons, which bamboozled,
grew like Kudzu into
an immense globular mass galore
('bout the size of Rhose Island) after one year ****
more, and wove in part from stem cell threads, nor
ceased proliferating after birth placenta
accrued intact and immediately put in cold store
room, a by very peculiar product
tinged with strands of blond hair
evoking how lioness would roar
coccooning, contriving,
and conveying this tiny dude
into a self concocted
hermetically sealed giant spore
miniature mummy, who without doubt
looked like a lady bug hide entombment
able to survive thermonuclear war
as a minor subsequent repercussion
the downy side understood, impeterable forest
filched countless growing years, without jest
ting, when figurative messed
hair em scare em bedlam reigned as a supreme nest
sans shrieking obsessed invisible hoodlums
broke free their electric kool aid acid test
from maximum security solitary confinement in vest
ment for naught (busting andirons weighing down
with reinforced steel trapdoor cladding
didst not bar compulsive
banshee like imps of thee pervert,
but merely slow down
miniscule limbs emulated a hitch hiker thumb
upon will could assume the Alaska Bull Worm sized
Albatross shaped achorage)
unsinkable (short term)
screaming, rebelling, quaking,
atomic sized banshee beastie boys
et cetera with fiery zest.
Nov 24, 2017
Nov 24, 2017 at 9:21 PM UTC
the harder it rains, the more useless the umbrella
the more you need it,
the more useless the umbrella
gone and blown the other way
dumbest thing you ever did in your life
i've done that all too
one dumb thing leads to another dumb thing
such a looped refrain
some dumb things just go together
one dumb thing
then another dumb thing
walking on the busy sidewalks
of chicago the overheard woman
i was watching
was talking friendly to the man beside her
about something he was not interested in
he walked away from her
midsentence
i went home and never forgot that
7 or 8 years later,
i was walking to work in south lake union
IT guy with the too long hair
caught up to me
and complained about his boss
i didn't know what to say
crossing arms crossed tight
conversation dying at the crosswalk
and he walked on ahead
as my hands looked for pockets
one dumb thing beside another dumb thing
such a looped refrain to keep on playing
Oct 27, 2017
Oct 27, 2017 at 1:52 AM UTC
Head on the desk.
Staring blankly ahead.
Finger tracing lines and edges.
Tears threatening to fall.
Wishing my heart would hold on.
Jul 9, 2017
Jul 9, 2017 at 12:21 AM UTC
Standing In The Abaft In Front Of The Commodore's Cabin,
I Look Back Towards The Towed Wooden Raft Floating,
And I Am Smiling To Myself After Remembering,
How The Angel Was found, Liberated & Lost.
Yes, Sadly, She Went Away, Never To Return,
Probably Her World Was Way Too Cherishable,
And Comparing To Her World I Was So Perishable,
Now I Have Learnt That Angels Are So Very Unnatural.
Oct 17, 2016
Oct 17, 2016 at 3:47 AM UTC
There's a cat with a grin.
Wicked as sin.
So it doth vanish into thin air.
Just a big grin dangling there.
In the realms of Alice.
Red queen stirring malice.
Off with her head so the red queen said.
And the dormouse slept in the tea ***
Stewing quietly.
The tea's too hot.
The fella with ****** hats.
Doffs them to the lords and ladies.
Shady character for sure.
He sips from the saucer he chucks.
Off with the queens head.
A lucky shot.
He runs and hides.
Makes a keen escape.
Alice holds him tight under her apron.
White bunny grabs them.
Up through the hole they go.
White rabbit, Mad Hatter and Alice as you know.
Scarpered along the river bank.
Sat on a rug for a minute or two.
Toes in the water.
In the house on the hill.
Daddy waits for his daughter.
She's in the garden.
She strolls back indoors.
Bunny's chucked back in his hutch.
Mad hatter is sat back on the window sill.
The looking glass beckons sweet Alice back in still.
She's had enough fun for one day.
(c)LIVVI
Feb 19, 2016
Feb 19, 2016 at 8:40 AM UTC
"What went wrong"
For me I did my very best,
But then i guessed that wasn't really my best.
I tried to blend myself in,
When I know I can't
but I'm still hoping.
It took alot of time,
The work i made is worth plenty of dime.
I kept on moving forward,
Thinking it'll be best and I will get some reward.
But I was **** wrong,
At some point.
I keep asking on what went wrong?
- 11/25/2k15
Nov 26, 2015
Nov 26, 2015 at 9:22 PM UTC
*As dawn came you went away,
As I watch the most beautiful sunset,
I wonder how it could have been
More beautiful if I was watching it with you.*
Aug 1, 2015
Aug 1, 2015 at 6:56 AM UTC
Stiletto heels and a push-up bra,
Hair piled high, bleached and toned and all…
That’s the way you used to shuffle around,
But you ain’t been much since your man went to town.
Who’s that a’ worrin’ bout them wrinkles and lines?
Is that the same broad who fell for all his lines?
Well, since he left you all you do is frown.
No, you ain’t done much since your man went to town.
You could’a picked a man who would’a cherished you
Once upon a time when love was fresh and new,
But you picked the one who was known all around.
Now, you ain’t known much since your man went to town.
(Interlude)
You could’a picked a man who would’a cherished you
Once upon a time when love was fresh and new,
But you picked the one who was known all around.
Now, you ain’t been much since your man went to town.
Whatcha gonna do when the rage runs high,
When the last tear falls cause the well has dried?
Whatcha gonna do when the sun goes down,
Cause you ain't slept much since your man went to town.
What’cha gotta to do to make it right
Is take your piece out of your purse, it’s a Saturday night.
What’cha gotta do is shoot him down,
‘Cause you cry too much since your man went to town.
Jul 18, 2015
Jul 18, 2015 at 2:12 AM UTC
Stiletto heels and a push-up bra,
Hair piled high, bleached and toned and all…
That’s the way you used to shuffle around,
But you ain’t been much since your man went to town.
Who’s that a’ worrin’ bout them wrinkles and lines?
Is that the same broad who fell for all his lines?
Well, since he left you all you do is frown.
No, you ain’t done much since your man went to town.
You could’a picked a man who would’a cherished you
Once upon a time when love was fresh and new,
But you picked the one who was known all around.
Now, you ain’t known much since your man went to town.
(Interlude)
You could’a picked a man who would’a cherished you
Once upon a time when love was fresh and new,
But you picked the one who was known all around.
Now, you ain’t been much since your man went to town.
What’cha gotta to do to make it right
Is take your piece out of your purse, it’s a Saturday night.
What’cha gotta do is shoot him down,
‘Cause you cry too much since your man went to town.
(I'm still tweaking the arrangement. It should have an upbeat Little Richard or Ray Charles rock-n-roll mid-upbeat tempo with possibly hand claps on the downbeat like a spiritual chorus... since most early rock and r&b; musicians got their starts in small black southern Baptist churches. Let me know what you think. If it ***** tell me.
Apr 23, 2015
Apr 23, 2015 at 11:03 AM UTC
Will I ever smile
Will I ever be happy for a while
Will I ever be glad
Will I ever feel anything other than sad
Will I ever be cherished
Will my heart be treasured
Will I ever be given what am promised
Will I ever be loved
Will my tears ever dry
Will I ever not wonder why
Why no one will ever try
So I dont cry
I ask myself
The thots I hold dear
The truth which I fear
Because truth is
I will never be cherished
My heart will never be treasured
I will never be given what am promised
And I will never be loved
Because truth is
Tears like mine
Aren't meant to dry
Apr 8, 2015
Apr 8, 2015 at 10:10 PM UTC
Last time we met and gazed at one another
You ignited a fire
and left!
You went away to your business
Leaving this poor soul in misery and longing
You ignited a fire
and left!
I waited for you until darkness
You came late and found me unconscious
The pain was so intense, dear
What else could I have done?
You ignited a fire
and left!
Just by your one touch I was revived
Putting my face to your breast
Crying like an infant, I sobbed
You ignited a fire
and left!
You went away to your business!
Dec 28, 2014
Dec 28, 2014 at 11:13 AM UTC