#ventiguess
There's a sharp pain
under my lung.
It's been there for three days now,
but I've just done my best to ignore it.
We went out to get dinner,
but on the way back you couldn't help but rip on me.
"And now we're broke."
"Of course you do, if you had more than one meal a day we wouldn't have money for rent."
These are jokes to you.
Every day it's something like this.
You make me feel like ****
because you can,
because you think getting me petty objects gives you a right
to treat me however you please.
You make fun of me,
make me feel like a burden,
then tell me to grow a sense of humor when I'm upset.
Because you made me upset.
You mess up my pronouns sometimes too,
and all I give is a gentle reminder,
because I know you forget things often,
just like I do,
and you snap at me.
"You just demand the world to change for you."
So I stop reminding you.
Because you don't forget.
You just don't want to remember.
Sometimes I wonder
if anyone likes their family.
If there are children out there
who grew up not wanting to hide away from the world,
who were welcomed in open arms,
instead of mocked,
belittled,
reviled,
told they're faking their illnesses,
told people like them are disgusting,
and shouldn't be allowed to exist in public spaces.
I wonder when you'll stop making my life all about you.
I've wondered that all my life.
But I've just done my best to ignore it.
Mar 11, 2018
Mar 11, 2018 at 10:21 PM UTC