#trusting
You’re paying homage to me
with your touch along my curves and edges.
With your golden, intense eyes.
With your kiss, your adoration.
This paid homage stirs me,
shakes out hidden grief,
reopens closed space,
unlocks dammed love.
Starts a new journey of ‘we’.
You’re paying homage to me,
aiming to reach me.
Intentionally, joyfully,
breaking down my
solitary
reality.
Apr 11, 2021
Apr 11, 2021 at 9:33 PM UTC
mister, mister
would you be so kind
as to tell me what trust is?
you see, you said i'm trusting
incredibly so, that it's refreshing
but i'm unsure of your words
mister, mister
do i trust people...
when I believe all my loved ones hate me
and would rather i disappear?
I'm not trusting, just desperate
a child simply wants to be loved
you reach out your hand
in case i need help
i'm sorry sir
i'm too stubborn for that
i walk two steps back
and fall a little further.
Mar 18, 2021
Mar 18, 2021 at 1:41 PM UTC
a wicked, unrighteous child's mind
lies closer to the truth
than a noble graybeard's ever will &
here is that only, hideous verity:
death has the body of a boy.
an ocherous-haired boy, sylphlike,
unearthly, peerless and
other word to forbear from writing 'beautiful'.
guiltless people do not know that.
'irradiating one, let me hold you', he says,
and i let him. i can recall swearing,
palms pressed together and liquid lungs
settled at the bottom of a bathroom sink,
never to allow to be eaten again
because that is what holding someone is for;
(guiltless people do not know that.)
be that as it may,
i let him.
forgiveness was never
suited for me, anyway.
there can be no fallacy;
no fraud can remain a fraud
once they are birdlimed
by a fire-stricken embrace.
a mindless prey is what they become.
a devourer is what he always was.
guiltless people do not know that.
my eyelids will not yet sink over my pupils,
not until his hidden claws,
ribboning and shredding their way
out of his unsoiled skin, turn
my neck into bloodbath,
my heart into maelstrom.
what a blessed, glory-driven way to meet death.
Jan 18, 2021
Jan 18, 2021 at 8:15 PM UTC
Beautiful sea breeze
How quickly you become a storm
You’re built of resilience
You bring with you an entourage
Of silver lining and moon tides
Sailor’s boats and lighthouse guides
Yet you still shy away from burning bridges
That monsters love to cross
Dec 14, 2020
Dec 14, 2020 at 4:48 AM UTC
I woke up to an empty bed
You didn’t come back last night
Where were you instead?
My question started a huge fight
But I trusted the words that he said,
I woke up to an empty bed.
He was sleeping with my friend
Oh, how I wanted her dead
Seeing him quickly became a horrible sight
Where were you instead?
The truth quickly came to light
Eating hot Cheetos alone, I was staying out of sight
I woke up to an empty bed.
I needed to clear my head,
I was crying away the long nights,
Where were you instead?
No I wasn’t alright,
He had taken my heart and left out of sight.
I woke up to an empty bed.
Where were you instead?
Nov 18, 2020
Nov 18, 2020 at 10:09 AM UTC
Looking for you
What else can I do
My heart is still lost
But its paid the cost
Of trusting your cover
And until I discover
More pain to numb this
I'll hold on to fake bliss
Apr 6, 2021
Apr 6, 2021 at 5:34 PM UTC
If I defend your name, would you defend mine?
If I wasn't there to speak, would you keep them in line?
Or would you be silent and give them the green light?
I wanted to believe that you would fight for me
That if I weren't there, you would be the voice I couldn't be.
May 17, 2020
May 17, 2020 at 11:49 PM UTC
Pour your heart out,
You won't be hurt this time.
Let your guard down,
You have it up too high.
Why don't you trust me?
I wouldn't hurt a fly.
Oh, you love me?
I'm sorry, I can't.
Goodbye.
Apr 18, 2020
Apr 18, 2020 at 3:51 PM UTC
To take care of thing's
To take away all your worries.
To open your eyes to new thing's
To protect you from harm.
To understand you with a clear mind.
To love you like your the only one in the world.
To always take care of your heart.
To believe in all of your dreams.
To never mistreat you.
To always have your back, no matter what.
To open your mind to new possibilities.
To build, and grow with you.
To never make you feel worthless.
To show you that there is always a way out of no way.
To always keep my promise.
To always make you feel important.
To never let you go.
so no matter what's going on in life, I always want you to
trust in me!
Oct 25, 2019
Oct 25, 2019 at 7:00 PM UTC
Pull the sheets up;
Let's hide under them.
No one can find us here.
Sure, no one is looking, either.
But I want to be with you, no distractions.
Take my hand in yours,
Can you hear my heart racing?
Can you tell my soul is aching?
I want to let it go.
I wanted to let you know,
Because I'd never let it show.
Would you stay with me, after the fact?
Could I share with you the truths of my past?
I don't want what we have to be ruined by that.
I don't want what we have to be ruined by anything.
Is it better I keep my secrets hidden,
That I keep inside where I hurt?
Or do you wish to lick my wounds.
Can I be myself with you,
Or only a percentage..
Jul 3, 2019
Jul 3, 2019 at 9:12 PM UTC
the one
precious thought
unfounded possibilities
unimaginable imagined
unassuming figure
crushed perception
beauty hearts desire
with just a glance
deep stare etching
hearts scarred tattoo
touch so gentle
gentleman’s dream
turned upside down
heart falling echoing words
manipulative skill lonely girl
picture left behind
presentation of facts
keeping your secrets
trust yourself
trusting no ******* possess me
till out of sight
among my mind
pirouette effect
leaving me flat footed
starring at the same moon
you gaze upon
********** plots of love
Dec 14, 2018
Dec 14, 2018 at 7:10 PM UTC
i am stuck in a glass box.
No I'm not a mime
and no I'm not Houdini
Though my legs are tied with chains I cannot seem to find the key to
Pulling me down behind metal doors and locks snapped shut
By my own doing, I am my own victim
The walls I’ve built above myself are now a sarcophagus I find comfort in
My grave dug deeper than the 6 feet recommendation,
The breathing space I have seems only to fill with water
The more I push away the help I crave,
The more I doubt I will get it.
With grave robbers visiting my tomb often
I am now use to the feeling of losing parts of myself I will not see again
Always being told from a young age to not give my whole heart away
But never fully listening
The iron gates I’ve built around myself
, impenetrable to those wanting to see in.
After the numerous moments I’ve wished id kept them shut
For those only wanting to take,
only give more reason to keep them locked.
Dec 13, 2018
Dec 13, 2018 at 9:52 AM UTC
We connected...
I trusted her to see me today
It felt like I gave a piece
of my soul away
She's friendly and kind
I really like her style
I think she'll do just fine
I will work on trusting me
More now
Oct 13, 2018
Oct 13, 2018 at 8:53 PM UTC
Know I should be looking forward
Excited for what future will bring
I just can't get over you
Still jump when I hear my phone ring
I am sure you're walking straight ahead
Don't have time to turn around
I call your name, you don't look back
Hesitate, you don't make a sound
I have never felt so vulnerable
Or insecure, shaking with fear
In my eyes you are still a hero
Too trusting and naive to see clear
Doesn't matter how much you hurt me
I do not care what you say or do
Can't imagine being happy
With any other person but you
Jul 24, 2018
Jul 24, 2018 at 4:51 PM UTC
I hate myself for blindly believing
Every word you said
For following you unquestionably
Eagerly going where I was led
I hate myself for my naivete
Thinking that you would stay
Never saw your true intentions
Now they're as clear as day
I hate myself for foolishly trusting you
Giving you all of my heart
Never should have depended on you
When I was breaking apart
I hate the way I easily let you in
Watched you rip me in two
Most of all I hate myself for
Falling in love with you
Jun 28, 2018
Jun 28, 2018 at 12:24 PM UTC
I'm questioning me
To my understanding
To listen
To hear.
To comprehend.
The morality
Of reality.
Am I slipping through or am I phasing past?
Am I the first or just one of the last.
Together we fall, around sun and past the moon to our silence we withstand.
We aren't alone we stand United.
A force unbreakable
A veil inseparable
As you see
Broken we are
Stupid is we
No one said we were straight
We just contemplate
At our weight
At our fate
At out faith
Can we be
Can they change
From the error
Of our ways?
It's just us
No its them
They're the reason we can't think
You're the reason we can't trust
So who's to blame ?
Who's to claim?
The Shame
From their ways
That they claim
Was right
I can't change
Neither can they
Cause humans we are
We have all the flaws
No one was said to be the perfect
Not even in the eyes of God.
Sidetracked as this goes
This all goes with into one flow
The dead hideous
All hurendous , of course you can see
Are the out cast of this world
God I might hurl.
But the living is pure
They're as perfect as me
But why
Cause no ones as sane as the guy next to me
Cause they aren't as Holy as they seem to be
So dead as living and living as dead
Everyone's them
But the same in the end
May 27, 2018
May 27, 2018 at 10:06 PM UTC
i am SICK of myself for trusting you over and over
and over
and over
and over
and OVER AGAIN
i am SICK of all the lies i believed
i am SICK of the time wasted on you
i am SICK of wanting you
i am SICK of thinking and thinking and thinking
of what i could've done better
of what i messed up on
of what i did wrong
so can you PLEASE tell me
because i am just so sick of this
Mar 1, 2018
Mar 1, 2018 at 10:51 AM UTC