#stillstanding
I see the truth they tried to erase,
screens full of whispers, shadows of control.
But I knew.
I always knew.
I fought in silence,
kept myself alive
when the world wanted me gone.
A small hand pulled me back from the edge,
a second chance,
my reason to stay.
I grieve.
I miss.
I ache.
But I refuse to lose.
Love cannot be taken.
Being a mother cannot be erased.
I gather my truth like armour,
walk into the battle with fire in my heart,
unbreakable, deliberate, relentless.
I fight for what belongs with me.
Feb 9
Feb 9, 2026 at 9:20 AM UTC
I moved because my heart whispered,
quietly, without fanfare.
I stepped into work I never imagined,
to see how far my care could stretch -
to see how deep I could fall for what I felt.
I pulled a friend into my quiet storm,
believing effort could bend fate.
But life hit harder than I expected -
an accident, a debt, a bruise,
a weight too heavy to carry alone.
I called you that day,
not for anything,
only to hear a voice that felt like a small refuge.
You responded as you naturally would,
unaware of the storms pressing down on me.
Not coldness, not anger -just normal,
because you didn’t know the depth of what I carried.
I promised to call again, to give,
but circumstances held me hostage.
Not from weakness, not from a lack of will -
but from life itself, testing how much a heart could endure.
Through all of it, I learned my limits,
and the depth of what I could feel for you.
Every risk I took, every storm I braved,
was measured, deliberate -
not for glory, not from desperation,
but to see how far my heart could fall
and still stand.
Even in chaos, a strange sweetness remained:
the fire of trying for you,
burning bright even
What remains isn’t regret -
just a calm, tired glow,
an unfinished energy I still carry.
Proof that some feelings stay pure
even when the world doesn’t go our way.
If you ever wonder what happened,
just know this:
I stepped forward sincerely,
fell honestly,
and stood up with the same heart -
still warm, still real,
just a little wiser than before!!!!!
WORK FROM ::
To Her Who Already Knows!!!
Feb 6
Feb 6, 2026 at 1:21 AM UTC
I learned to walk with weight on my chest,
Dreams folded small so duty could fit.
I smiled when needed, stayed quiet when loud,
And carried a storm that I wouldn’t admit.
I loved without counting the cost at first,
Gave warmth even when the time was thin.
Some hands stayed close, others slipped away,
But love still left its mark within.
I don’t regret the feelings I felt,
They taught my heart how deep it could go.
Not every love is meant to stay—
Some just remind you you’re alive, you know.
I loved where there was no empty space,
Not because my heart was unsure.
But wanting alone couldn’t build a future,
Or a promise that would endure.
Time kept moving, it never asked
If my heart was ready or my hands were free.
So I chose the work, the skill, the grind,
The slow becoming of who I must be.
I don’t hate love, I don’t fear it now,
I just know seasons don’t align.
Some love waits, some love passes through,
None of it wasted, none of it mine.
I’ve fallen before, I’ve risen again,
Burned down to focus, rebuilt with will.
Maybe joy comes quiet, maybe love returns,
But my purpose never stood still.
So let this end without bitterness,
No closed fists, no borrowed pain.
I walk forward with an open heart,
Through the sun and the driving rain.
If love finds me, I’ll meet it whole.
If not, I’ll still arrive complete.
Because I didn’t lose myself loving or trying—
I’m still standing, steady on my feet.
Jan 14
Jan 14, 2026 at 2:45 PM UTC
it’s a bad,
bad world.
the world's
on fire —
and i'm just
livin' in it.
don’t
tell me
it's alright,
don't tell
me it'll
be fine.
because
when the
fire winds
down,
all that's
left is smoke —
truths and regrets.
the world
feels heavy,
and i wish
this wasn’t
testing me.
(is it over yet?)
all
i want,
and all
i need,
is to
find my
center again —
and not
let this
get the best
of me.
because
being pulled
down by
the weight
of the world
is somewhere
i don’t
want to
end up
again.
Aug 8, 2025
Aug 8, 2025 at 12:57 AM UTC
so, I decided to challenge myself and write a poem that included the titles of 20 of my favorite songs. and I did it. this might be one of my favorites. see if you can find all the titles. check it out
I thought I’d have to go to another world
to find somewhere I belong.
I felt powerless. Alone. A broken man in a carnival of rust.
My friends always tried to make me feel wanted
by saying “someone’s gonna light you up.”
But I always felt like the only thing people saw
were my imperfections.
They wouldn’t have tried so hard to break me
if they saw how good of a person I tried to be, right?
Or is it the opposite? They didn’t want one more light
in a world that was already so dark?
Well, they almost won. I almost tried to see heaven.
But I’m still standing.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m a simple man
or because I decided to stand in the light,
but I was given a second chance. Now, I don’t worry about a thing.
Because what I’ve got is all I’ve ever wanted.
Every time I look in her angel eyes, little by little,
the black of my iris gets lighter.
And now that I can see how beautiful life can be,
I’m not afraid to follow you wherever you will go.
I’m forever yours…faithfully.
May 28, 2021
May 28, 2021 at 11:18 AM UTC
by the sea
i saw her there,
lost on another voyage;
i hope she finds her way
home
floating on the notes
between the bars of the road
bopping along a scale
frozen in time
until the asphalt weakens
under the sun and rain and snow;
washout roads
lead to washed out souls
but
conditions have never been better.
i was saved by a martyr self
bundled in boxes and shipped off to
my sister — my keeper;
rescued by captain fantastic,
sleeping with myself,
saved in time tonight and every night
and winding it down
like the brown dirt cowboy you always knew i could be.
those songs came over the waves
sailing through my musical bones,
electrified;
neurotransmitters like piano keys
jazzing up a well-strummed soul,
fingers plucking heart strings without resistance,
and i am at the mercy of music you’ve made -
that mesmerizing melody
in the inflection of your voice
and
the movement of your body
against mine;
rhythm.
don’t **** this song and dance
when the curtains just opened
let this harmony take us home
and resonate.
Dec 4, 2019
Dec 4, 2019 at 3:32 PM UTC