#spokenpoetry
I can’t seem to get you out.
Every memory, touch, and place
stains onto me—
a thin layer of you
I can’t peel off.
I see you in every cell,
And I can’t seem to get you
out of my skin.
You’re glued on.
I’m rubbing friction,
Hoping you’ll shred apart,
but just like adhesive glue,
with time
you solidify onto me.
At first, I thought that meant love—
that this ache was proof of _something_
That if I just kept rubbing,
this pain would mean something
But now I smell the burn of it,
the friction I made to forget you
set me on fire.
I look into your eyes to plead,
but all I see is pure adoration.
and I melt.
I’m hypnotized.
Those big round eyes,
engulf me.
I thought I saw love
in those brown eyes.
I realized too late
that it was a reflection of mine
and I can't seem to get me out
My wanting.
My love, mirrored back
so perfectly
I believed it was yours.
Now every time I try to get you out,
I find another piece of me
stuck there too.
To burn you off of me,
I burn a piece of me too.
Nov 8, 2025
Nov 8, 2025 at 8:58 PM UTC
Today,
my dad talked to a 25 year old
about war, politics, and religion.
He said people my age should read more,
and not blindly watch the news,
things aren't as they seem.
He went on and I unconsciously nodded along
Today,
he dropped by a neighbour’s house.
They had all sorts of dishes prepared
just the way he likes it.
He tells jokes and laughs,
the kind that turns him red, tears coming out,
and you can’t help but laugh along with him—
even when it’s not funny.
He would tell them stories about the old days,
interesting ones, that keep your ears open
Today,
someone called him in a panic
telling him that their child is sick
they've gone to all these hospitals and clinics
but they're still unsure of what to do
his calm voice reassures them
and after a couple questions
his brain rummages through the Library of Alexandria
and knows exactly what the issue is
and what to do
a few days later, the call comes in again
and the child is completely fine
He's so smart...about everything
Oh! even that other day someone called him
they were in a real pickle
I'm talking like someone was trying to kidnap them
and beat them up
but my dad is a hero
without a second thought he rushed to help
He's so loved, admired and respected,
there's not a single person out there in the world who couldn't depend on him.
And today he-!
No...
Today I’m twenty-five years old,
and full of opinions to share
but no one is there to talk to.
Today, I’m sick,
and I don’t know what pill to take.
Today, I wasn't invited to anything
and I don't know what to eat
and no one to laugh with.
Today, I almost got kidnapped
but my phone just kept ringing
and no one picked up
And when people say,
“Your dad’s such a good man,”
I nod.
So when I think to myself..
“Who did my dad talk to today?”
I already know.
And I stopped waiting for the day
the answer would be
me.
Nov 8, 2025
Nov 8, 2025 at 9:17 PM UTC
Maybe
i brought one ticket to my grad, knowing he won’t be there knowing imma be sitting in a seat looking at the door just hoping that maybe he will walk through and maybe this was a dream maybe we didn’t break up maybe he still cares, maybe my family will stop asking how he’s doing because he’s with you. Just maybe I could be happy again. Maybe the nights won’t continue to seem long maybe my days are filled with smiles maybe I will always have him on my mind. Maybe that one day I’ll be able to forgive myself for letting you go. Maybe I won’t be the one crying myself to sleep, crying and begging my friends on why he left, just maybe I’ll find peace in all this chaos and maybe I’ll be me again.
Just maybe.
Aug 19, 2023
Aug 19, 2023 at 10:07 PM UTC
Hindi agad nagtama ang mga mata natin kaya naman
'Di ko akalaing magkukrus ang mga landas natin
Alam mo 'yong: 'makuha ka sa tingin'?
Ang ginawa mo'y hinablot mo 'ko sa kada titig na
Dadampi sa aking gawi—'di ko pinapansin
Ngunit nang magsimula na ang tugtog ay siyang kusang
Pagdidikit ng mga palad natin. Bawat hakbang,
Sabay ang galaw ng ating katawan
Ito siguro ang pakiramdam ng nalutang sa buwan
Binibigay ka ng mga ningning sa mga mata mo:
Ang mga lihim na nakayukom sa puso mo
At sa mapupula **** labi ko narinig ang
Sinabi **** ganiyan din ang nararamdaman ko
Ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko, nakakabingi
Kung alam mo lang na ito ang dalangin gabi-gabi
Kaya ang sabi ko, wala na akong pakialam pa
Kung sa balikat hahawak o sa bewang ba
O kahit pareho pa tayong nakapalda
Basta isasayaw kita hanggang sa ako'y
Maputulan ng hiniga
Ikaw ang kaharap ko, wala akong pag-aalala
Kahit pa ramdam ko ang mga mata nila sa'ting dalawa
At mas maingay pa ang bulungan
Kaysa awit ng banda
O kahit ilang tapak pa ang gawin mo sa aking paa
Hindi ko bibitawan ang kamay mo; hayaan mo
Mapapagod din sila
Basta ako, alam ko ang mahalaga: ikaw ang mahalaga
Ang pakiramdam ng hininga mo sa balat ko
Ito ang mahalaga, ang pagyapos mo sa'king kaluluwa
Habang inaangkin natin ang magdamag, ito ang mahalaga
Iyan ang mga sinabi ko noong gabi ng pagtatanghal
Pero huwag ka sanang mabibigla
Hindi ito madadaan sa isang sambitla o kahit
Maupo pa 'ko upang ilahad sa 'yo lahat
Hindi ko rin alam kung saa't kailan nagsimula
Ang alam ko lang, dito ako ipinadpad
Ng agos na pilit kong nilabanan
At sa tuwing maglalakbay, ang anino mo ang
Laging nadadatnang tumatakbo palayo sa kalawakan
Pero saglit lang, 'di ko alam kung ako ba'ng may kasalanan
Sa walang hanggan nating habulan
Na para bang tayo'y laging pinagtatagpo upang
Tunghayan ang sakit na dinudulot sa isa't isa
Pero teka muna, saglit lang, ako lang ba ang nagdaramdam?
May ngiti na sa 'yong mga mata kahit mga luha
Ang umaagos sa kanila; ang iyong tindig ay parang
Noong una nating sayaw— ngunit may nagbago sa 'yong galaw
Napaisip ako, 'di ko mapigilan, kung ikaw pa ba ang natatanaw
Ang dalaga noong una't huli kong sayaw
Na alam kong imposible nang balikan
Ang sa'kin lang ay sana'y alam mo na
Lahat ng 'yon ay tunay
At mahal kita, maniwala ka
Kahit ako pa ang unang bumitaw
#
Aug 21, 2021
Aug 21, 2021 at 1:33 AM UTC
True love never dies
Loyal souls never change
Don’t distort the beauty of fairytales
Don’t blame it on life
Don’t blame it on you
Don’t fake your heart
‘Cause I won't do
Thought you were my angel
So I gave you my wings
Now you're ready to fly?
I whined hey wait
But you're hailing goodbye
I offered you a platonic love
A ****** a pure an innocent love
I said babe *** got nothing on me
Clog your ears believe what you see
They only gossip about me
They can't be you and they won't own me
But you were disgusted with the taste of my kiss
That’s why I hated the scent of my lips
You know… I spent my youth buying time for you
Guess I’ll spend my sunsets waiting here for you
Even though I’m wide aware
That time and tide wait for no man
But I’m prepared to make an exception
‘Cause our romance was perfection
And I’ll rebirth its dead sensation
Sep 5, 2019
Sep 5, 2019 at 12:51 PM UTC
Paano ba nagsimula ang ating kwento?
Yung dating magkabila nating mundo
Yung biruang ikaw at ako
Akalain **** ngayon ay nagkaron ng tayo
Teka, pano nga ba nauwi sa tawagang jowa?
Eh ilang taon nating di pansin ang isa’t isa
Malayo, malabo at talagang di naman uubra
Kahit siguro magbakasali, iisipin pa ring malabo at di gagana
Bakasali... tama, isang araw na nag baka sakali
Baka sakaling mapansin o baka sakaling pansinin
Baka naman maumpisahan o kaya naman ay masubukan
Kung gagana nga ba talaga o hanggang tanong na lang
Isang araw na di sinasadya, di rin naman pinagplanuhan
Inumpisahan natin sa simpleng batian
Na nauwi sa magdamagang kwentuhan
Hanggang sa aminan ng nararamdaman
Araw araw, palagian at halos kadalasan
Kwentuhan, asaran, lalo na ang mga awayan
Hindi pa nga tayo nun mag jowa kung titignan
Pero yung bangayan, parang aso’t pusang nagka sabayan
At dumating na nga yung punto
Na yung dating hindi sigurado, nabuo
Yung dating malabo, naging klaro
Yung dating ikaw at ako.....
Ngayon ay tayo.
May 3, 2019
May 3, 2019 at 8:00 AM UTC
Naalala ko pa yung araw na napagdesisyunan kong kumain sa McDo.
Kasi wala lang, trip ko lang.
Hindi naman ako gutom, hindi rin pagod.
Pero nag-McDo ako.
Noong panahong yun,
Saka ko lang narealize yung sinasabi nilang "Self Worth."
Pahalagahan ang sarili, mahalin.
Bagay na hindi ko nagawa sa nakaraan.
Kaya ayun, nagwakas, natuldukan.
Paano naman nga ba kasi magpapahalaga sa iba
Kung sarili ko nga di ko mapahalagahan.
Umorder na ko ng fries at Big Mac
Syempre kasama ang paborito kong McFloat.
Nasa kalagitnaan na ko ng pagnguya
Nung nagtanong ka
"May nakaupo na po ba?"
Hindi ko na tiningnan ang kanyang mukha
Umiling nalang ako.
Nagtataka rin kasi ako bat sa harap ko pa naisipan **** umupo.
Yun pala, wala na talagang pwesto sa McDo.
Binasag mo ang katahimikan sa pagpapakilala mo sa akin.
Bigla atang lumamig ng hangin
Lalo na nung nakita kong nakangiti ka sakin.
Nagkakilala tayo. Naging magkaibigan.
Ikaw ang nagsilbi kong Happy Meal
sa araw-araw na paggising ko.
Hindi ko na kailangan ng Happy Meal toy
Kasi makasama ka lang enjoy na ako.
Ikaw yung chicken fillet na
sa sobrang lambot ng pisngi mo nanggigigil ako.
Ikaw yung Hot Fudge na mas matamis pa
sa Dairy Milk kasi sobrang sweet mo.
At para kang gravy ng McDo
na hanggat di ubos yung ulam magrerefill ako.
Hanggang isang araw, inaya mo ko mag-McDo.
Masaya akong sumama kasi minsan lang yun.
Ako naman ililibre ng taong madalas ilibre ko.
Feeling ko tuloy sasagutin mo na ako.
Nagpresenta kang ikaw na o-order
At ako nang bahala sa uupuan.
Hindi ko alam bakit pagkaupo ko palang
Nakaramdam na ko ng kalungkutan.
Natakot ako bigla sa di malamang dahilan.
Buti dumating ka na, at
Buti nakangiti ka.
Ngunit ako ay nagtaka na
Ang pagkaing binili mo ay hindi para sa dalawa.
Agad **** sinabi saken na saglit lang,
May pupuntahan ka lang.
Pagkaalis mo, kinain ko na ang binili mo.
Pero nagulat ako
Matapos kong i-angat ang burger na inorder mo.
"Hindi pa pala ako handa."
Nakasulat sa sticky note na nilagay mo.
Di ko alam ano ibig **** sabihin
Kaya nagdecide akong ikaw ay hintayin.
Mahal, sabi mo saglit.
Pero bakit hindi ka na bumalik?
Iniwan mo na ako.
Iniwan mo gamit ang isang sticky note,
Kasama ang favorite kong McFloat.
Feb 24, 2019
Feb 24, 2019 at 10:16 PM UTC
A flight here and a flight there
Let me compensate for not being there
When you needed me
When you need me
I taught you how to deal with pain
While being lonely
I thought you how to fight away the demons
By leaving them to feast on your flesh
To gnaw at your bones
To leave you for dead
And I return to take you on a trip
To take you away from the misery that i am blind toward
That I do not know you have
I taught you how to talk through your fears
Now the only ones you talk to are in your brain
No father, I will not shed a tear
I am the water beneath the desert
the undiscovered landmines in the soil
I am held back tears and the god of war
The war against pain
As I fight in the trenches
In a battlefield facing myself
Battling an enemy that is closer than the end of my nose
Breathing so heavy, until the pain to goes to hell
Don’t let me see the tear stains on your sweater sleeve
You are not the child i birthed
You are but a machine
Do you not feel a thing?
Can you not say you’re glad?
I’ve never seen you smile
Is that a tear in your eye?
Save it for later
Throw away the paper
You cannot be another traitor
To your brain
Do not talk about your heart
you are not a painter
No woman, i am not your child
I am nobody’s daughter
Just a trapped little boy
Screaming through the windows
Cause you won’t let me out
Of this house made of hate
With these cracks in the walls
That lets in little rays of love
That I am too afraid to touch
Because i barely know love
But the walls of my house are my skin and my bones
And the prison called *** that is set on the roof
No I’m not complaining I’m just being honest
Didn’t you teach me that when you said I was going to be nothing
When you called me a pig and I learnt to cry silently
Now I almost always cry silently
~~
For these are the scars that I bear on my soul
That I wear on my sleeve
For i have been told that there is beauty in acceptance
In accepting what you’ve faced
And learning how to be loved
And how to be alone
Dec 16, 2018
Dec 16, 2018 at 11:49 PM UTC
paano mahihimbing
sa gabing 'di ka na malalambing?
bakit pa gigising
sa umagang 'di ka na kapiling?
Oct 28, 2018
Oct 28, 2018 at 1:04 AM UTC
Love is like a jumble of sweet candies and a cocktail of sour lemon. Yes, there's sweetness but there should also be sourness. Love is complicated. It's too much to handle. It is a disaster. But even if such disaster falls upon you, you would like it.
Why?
Because it's beautiful. Captivating. Mesmerizing. Rapid. Massive. When you feel it, you don't want to let go of it because it's precious and significant and special.
But how come when we fall in love, our heart turns into a wineglass standing in the fury of a storm? Why does our heart feels like anytime it would break? Why does it feels like anytime it would lose its color? Its beauty?
Have you ever felt like your love for a certain person is not enough? Have you ever felt like you're not enough? And when you wake up from that drastic dream, you feel like you should just stop. Just sit right there and do nothing because you know someday your heart would break again.
How you caress your heart deeply into your hand hoping that someday someone would do the same.
When you say to yourself that you've had enough, that you've given up, you feel brave and courageous as if no matter what is thrown at you, you will not falter. You would stay strong and keep you head held high. But love is just too different. We turn into a feather that once will let go, we would fall, we would fall in that hard ground and even though we won't break any bones, our heart would be the one that'll break.
If he turns up to you and say I love you, it'll be hard to believe because before he told you he loves you, you know it's meant for someone else.
Sep 28, 2018
Sep 28, 2018 at 7:26 AM UTC
Bubbles in a bath,
loud moaning blaring in the back
as I look down at the
bruising on my
muted
skin.
I try to imagine
myself with your
glowing frame
submerged underneath
the water.
Without you, I've
been a bit dramatic.
A bit manic.
Wandering and wonderin';
yeah, I've let my mind
slip at night.
In the hours of now until
then, I try to
refrain.
I indulge myself
into routine.
I watch lovers on the
screen.
Envisioning myself with
women in the late
hours but mimicking
your strokes in the
morning.
Without you,
without you.
I'm free to be me.
With you, I'm
happy.
Molten coffee scorches my
untouched tongue,
reminding me that
I can still feel
warmth.
Damp moss grazes my
untasted body,
reminding me that
I can still
dream.
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 10:58 PM UTC
Ngingiti ka na naman;
Lolokohin mo na naman ang buong mundo,
Paniniwalain ang lahat ng tao,
Uutuin maging ang sarili mo--
Na ayos ka lang,
Na wala kang problema,
Na patuloy kang lumalaban
Sa buhay kung sa’n
Ang sarili ang iyong kalaban.
“Ayos lang” ang iyong sagot sa tanong na “kamusta ka?”
At ngayon ko lamang napagtanto na palabiro ka pala.
Lahat nang ‘yan, iyong itatago sa iisang ngiti.
At sa iyong pagkukubli,
Lahat ay napaniwala.
Tatawa ka na naman;
Muling ipaparinig ang iyong halakhak.
‘Yung tipong mabibingi silang lahat
At masasabing ikaw ay masaya at tapat.
Pero ang bawat ritmo ay kumpas ng kasinungalingan
Na hindi namamalayan dahil sa lakas ng tawanan.
Itutuloy ang tawa hangga’t ang kasiyahan ay maisilang.
Pambihirang panlilinlang.
Daig mo pa ang hunyango pagdating sa pagtatago.
Lahat idaraan mo sa tawa, hindi dahil masaya ka,
Kundi dahil wala kang mukhang maihaharap.
At sa iyong pagpapanggap,
Lahat ay napaniwala.
Mananahimik ka na naman;
Mambibingi gamit ang saradong bibig.
Sasampalin ang buong mundo ng kantang walang ritmo,
Walang liriko, at walang nota.
Dahil hindi tengang handang makinig ang iyong kailangan,
Kundi pangunawa at ang maintindihan.
Mahirap bang gawing salita ang iyong nadarama?
Hirap ka bang magsabi ng kahit ano sa kanila?
Kaya’t mananahimik ka na lang
At paparoon sa isang sulok.
Aawit nang pabulong,
Rinig lamang ang iyong suntok.
At sa iyong pananahimik,
Lahat ay napaniwala.
Mangangamba ka na naman;
Matutulog na lang, sasaktan pa ang sarili mo.
Titingin sa paligid at magiisip nang kung anu-ano.
Kahit ano.
Kahit masakit.
Hanggang sa maaawa ka sa kalagayan mo ngayon
At Iiyakan ang sariling takot bumangon.
Malulungkot, magagalit
At mapapatanong kung bakit.
Bakit ganito? Bakit ganyan?
Bakit ang mata mo ngayo’y luhaan?
Minsan tulog na lamang iyong hiling,
Pero pagod ka pa rin maging sa paggising.
Mangangamba at iisipin ang lahat.
Lahat sila,
Lahat ng iyong napaniwala.
Pero hindi ako.
Ibahin mo ako,
Simula’t sapul, hindi mo ‘ko maloloko.
Hindi mo ‘ko mapapaniwala, hindi mauuto,
Dahil kilala kita,
At alam ko ang pinagdaraanan mo.
Alam kong hirap ka na sa pagsubok ng buhay.
Mistulang ang bawat araw ay pare-pareho na lamang,
Walang bago, puro tabang.
Maaaring tensionado ka, dulot ng paaralan.
O ‘di kaya’y dahil diyan sa mga tinatawag **** “kaibigan.”
Pwede ring dahil sa iyong tahanan.
Dahil sa sakit na dulot ng kung ano man.
Kilala kita.
Alam ko ang nararamdaman mo.
Alam kong gusto mo nang huminto,
Gusto mo nang itigil ang laro,
Pagod ka nang bumangon,
At takot nang umahon.
Tulad ng isang dahon na kahit kalian
Ay ‘di maibabalik sa punong pinanggalingan.
At iyo na lamang inaantay ang iyong paglanta.
Sa isang lugar, inirereklamo ang tagal ng pagkawala.
Dahil ikaw ay sawang-sawa.
Paulit-ulit na lamang.
May galit, may pait pagkatapos ng hagupit.
Babangon, sasaya, at muling babalik sa sakit.
Alam kong luha ang ‘yong nais ipabatid,
At hindi ang iyong mga tawa.
Dahil dama ko ang iyong lungkot sa tuwing ika’y masaya.
Alam kong hirap ka na.
Alam ko, alam ko.
Kilala kita.
Alam ko ang pagkatao mo.
Hirap ka nang kumapit, alam ko.
Dahil mahina ka,
At ‘di mo kailangang magpanggap;
Alam ko ang iyong hanap.
Ngunit nawa'y maintindihan mo,
Tanggap kitang buo at totoo.
Pwede ka nang umiyak,
Pwede mo nang bitiwan ang 'yong sandata,
Pwede mo nang ibaba ang iyong kalasag,
Pwede ka nang maging totoo.
‘Wag nang magpanggap na malakas ka,
Pwede kang maging mahina.
Pwede mo nang burahin ang iyong ngiti.
Pwede kang umiyak,
Hayaan **** dumaloy ang mga luha.
Sige, isumbong mo lahat,
Sabihin mo ang lahat sa akin,
Akala mo ba’y ‘di ko napapansin?
Sumuko man ang araw at nagdulot ng dilim,
‘Di kita susukuan at mananatiling taimtim.
Patuloy na kumakapit,
Inaantay ang 'yong paglapit.
Alam kong mapapatanong ka na naman kung bakit.
Bakit alam ko, at bakit ganito.
Pasensiya kung may pagkukulang man ako,
Ngunit hiling ko lamang na ikaw ay magkwento.
At sabay tayong ngingiti at tatawa,
Saba’y tayong iiyak sa drama.
Yayakapin kita,at patuloy na uunawain,
Dahil 'yun lang din naman ang gusto kong gawin.
Sabi ko nga sa’yo, kilalang-kilala kita.
At ‘di tulad ng iba,
Hindi mo 'ko mapapaniwala.
Dahil siyempre, ako ang 'yong ina.
Mar 14, 2018
Mar 14, 2018 at 12:27 PM UTC
Masakit maiwan dahil sa isang paglisan
Mga bagay na di maiwasang masaktan
Mga alaala pilit kinalimutan
Dala nito ay bigat na nararamdaman
Mga patak ng luha hindi mapigilan
Dahil sa mga bigat na dala ng nakaraan
Kung saan matagal maghilum ang sugat ng kahapon
Na minsan ikaw mismo nahirapan itapon
Kaya sa pagsikat ng araw ay hudyat ng bagong umaga ng paglalakbay,
Ito ay nagsasabing tuloy lang ang buhay
Na maaaring gumawa ng mga bagong alaala,
Para sa isang bagong kabanata
Kasama sa unti-unting pagbangon,
Ang mga tamang pagtugon
Sa mga bagay na kailangan tanggapin,
Para ang sarili muling hanapin.
Kasabay ng pagbuhos ng malakas na ulan,
Ang mga natirang sakit ay tuluyang nahugasan
At di naglaon ito ay tumila,
Lumabas ang bahaghari dala ay pag-asa
Kasama nito ang simoy ng hangin, na nagmulat sa paningin
Na ang pagiging masaya ay sadyang pinipili,
At hindi masamang magmahal muli
Makita ang pagmamahal na para sa'kin hanggang sa huli
Kaya isa lang ang aking dalangin, matupad ang aking pangarap
Na ikaw ay aking mahanap
Di na sa panaginip kundi sa mundong tinatahak
Sana dumating ka na
Di sa isip kundi sa harap ko at nakikita ng dalawa kong mga mata
Sana makita ko na yung ngiti mo
Mga ngiti na magsasabi sa akin na maging masaya lang dapat ako
Sana mahawakan na kita
Para di ko na maramdaman ang lungkot at pangamba
Sana mayakap na kita
Para maibsan yung sakit dulot ng aking mga problema
Sana dumating ka na
Para maramdaman ko ang sayang matagal ko ng hinahanap
At kung nandyan ka na
Sana hindi tayo ipaglayo ng tadhana
Dahil ngayon masasabi ko na ako'y "Handa"
Handa na akong magpakulong muli sa rehas ng pag-ibig, at para iyong malaman
Ang pag-ibig kong ito ay pang matagalan
Dahil ako'y handang susuko
Kahit life time sentence sa piling mo.
Nov 1, 2017
Nov 1, 2017 at 9:41 PM UTC
Kamusta kana?
Ilang taon na ang nagdaan nuong ika'y aking nakilala.
Mahigit kumulang na rin ang luhang lumabas sa aking mga mata
Nuong ako'y iniwan **** nag-iisa.
Nuon pag ika'y naaalala nagwawala dahil sa nadarama.
Ngayon ako'y napapangiti na lamang sa twina.
Akala ko dati ay di ko makakaya,
ngunit heto unting unting sumasaya kahit wala ka.
Mahirap sa umipsa,
Pero nakaya
Mahirap sa umpisa, oo
Parang nilibing at hinampas ng troso.
Ako'y litong lito
hindi alam kung bakit ganito
Kung bat nilisan mo...
"Sana pala pinigilan kita
para ngayon para ika'y kasama parin
at nasa tabi ko padin."
Yan ang aking hiling sa unang linggong
ika'y hindi kapiling.
Ako'y humihiling sa bituin na sana ika'y bumalik sa akin
Ngunit tila ba'y hangin ang sumagot at hindi ako pinansin.
Mahal wag mag-alala
kasi kaya ko na ang mag-isa at wala ka.
Mas malakas na ako
kaysa sa dating nakilala mo.
Hindi na ako umiiyak pagnag-iisa
Mas kaya ko na.
Alam mo minsan ang ang tanong sa sarili ko
"paano kaya ikaw parin ay nandito?"
"Magiging kompleto kaya ang araw ko?"
Pero ang sagot ng isip at puso
"Mas mabuting ika'y nilisan kaysa minahal sa kasinungalingan.
Naging malakas ka nang ikaw ay iniwan.
Naging makata ka paminsan minsan."
Kaya alam ko sa sarili na mas maayos na na ako'y iyong binabayaan
Pero mas masaya at buo parin ang aking puso kong hindi mo iniwan sa kadiliman.
Sana, iyong malaman na ika'y aking minahal ng lubusan,
"Huwag **** pabayaan ang iyong kalusugan"
Aking huling habilin bago ka lumisan.
Tinanong ko parin ang aking sarili minsan,
"Ako ba'y may pagkukulang? O sadyang ako lang ang nagmahal sa aming pag-iibigan?"
Maraming tanong ang tumatakbo sa aking isipan pag alaala ay naalala paminsan-minsan.
Ngunit lahat ng yon ay di mo masasagot at aking na lamang dinagdag sa tulaan.
Lahat na ata'y aking nakwento sa tulang ito.
Ito, itong tula na ito ang tanging paraan upang malaman mo
Ang pagdurusang pinagdaanan ko
nang mawala ka sa piling ko.
Ang mga pangakong binitawan mo
para bang naglaho
Pero kahit masakit ang ginawa mo
Hindi kita masisisi sa pagkukulang nagawa ko
Hindi ko masisi ang tadhana kung hindi tayo para sa dulo.
Kahit na ganito, ikaw ang nagparamdaman ng pagmamahal
Kaya hindi ko kita malimut-limutan kahit tila ba'y ako ay sinasakal.
Sadyang ikaw lamang ay minahal
kahit na isang malaking sampal
na ako'y iyong iniwang luhaan at puso'y nagdurugo sa daan
na kahit pa'y ikaw ay may iba ng mahal
kahit pa na naubusan na ang luha at letra sa aking isipan.
At heto ako ipinagdiriwang ang ating kaarawan kung saan nagsimula ang ating pagmamahalan.
Sana'y iyong malaman,
na ako'y hindi nakakalimot sa ating tagpuan at mga kasiyahan.
Sana rin iyong malaman,
ang pangalan ng ating anghel ay Adrian.
Oct 6, 2018
Oct 6, 2018 at 1:31 PM UTC
Gusto ko simulan ang tulang ito sa tanong na "kamusta kana?"
Kamusta na ang taong minahal ko ng sobra pa sa sobra
Naging malungkot kaba nung ako'y nawala?
O naging masaya dahil wala na ako sa tabi mo sinta
Nagbabaliktanaw ako sa mga ala-ala noon na ating binuo
Naging masaya naman tayo
Kaya di ko alam anong dahilan mo para mag bago
Para masaktan mo ako ng ganito
Para iparamdam mo sa'kin na hindi ako kawalan mo
Para ipamukha mo sa'kin na wala na talagang TAYO
At ngayon napaisip ako kaya ka pala nagbago kasi may bago na palang nagpapatibok ng puso mo
Di ko mapigilan hindi magalit
Di ko mapigilan na hidi masaktan
Di ko mapigilan na lumuha hanggat gabi patungong umaga
Di ko mapigilan na tanggapin na ako nalang yung naiwang tanga
Tanga na umaasa na magkabalikan pa tayong dalawa
Umaasa at nagmamakaawa "Pakiusap mahal, usap tayo. Ayusin natin to"
Pero sarili ko lang pala ang niloloko ko
Kasi nakikita na kitang palayo at hindi na maaabot
Nakikita na kitang naglalakad kasama siya habang puso ko'y kumikirot
Kaya sa huling pagkakataon
Binalikan ko ang dati nating tagpuan
Nagbabasakali na ikaw ay madatnan
Pero namulat ako sa realidad na may mga bagay palang di na pwede maging katotohanan
Kaya heto nagbaliktanaw nalang ako sa mga magandang ala-ala na akin paring hinahawakan
Kasabay ng pag-agos ng alon ay ang pag-agos ng luhang nagasasabing kailangan ko na 'tong bitawan
Kaya ngayon tatahak nalang ako ng ibang landas
Maglalakad ako, pilitin na ang mga nangyari sa'ting dalawa ay maya-maya ay kukupas
Maglalakad ako, habang wala ka na sa tabi ko, yung taong minahal ko ng wagas
Maglalakad ako, maglalakad ako
Pero lilingon parin ako at makikita ko ang iyong mga bakas
Bakas na patunay na ikaw ay naging totoo
At hindi panaginip na nilikha ng imahinasyon ko
Na merong ikaw na pansamantalang minahal ako
Merong ikaw na minsan ay ginawa kong mundo
Merong ikaw na tinanggap ng buong-buo at
Merong ako na sinubukang lumaban pero sa huli meron paring ikaw na bumitaw nalang ng bigla-biglaan
Hanggang ngayon naglalakad parin ako dala-dala ang katangang "Pinagtagpo pero di tinadhana"
Yan nga siguro kasi ang kwento nating dalawa
Ang mga landas natin na wari'y nagkita,
Ngunit hindi inalaan para magkasama.
Maglalakad ako, hanggang sa malimutan na kita mahal ko
Sep 5, 2017
Sep 5, 2017 at 3:41 AM UTC
Batong niluluto, tinutunaw, tinuturok
Dahong sinisinghot, hinihithit, pinapausok
Dukhang nahuhumaling, hinuhuli, pinapatay
Mayamang sinungaling, tumatakas, kumakampay
#ChangeIsComing ngunit wala namang binago
Ang mahirap ay tumba, ang mayaman ay nagtago
Inosenteng nadadamay, diniktan ng karatula
Bangkay na nakahandusay, hindi na bibigyang hustisya.
Halina,
doon sa bago kong tahanan
Ang tawag ay kulungan
ngunit marami do'ng libangan.
Pinuno,
leader ako ng sindikato
Kung tawagi'y bilanggo
ngunit sinusunod ang luho.
Mga alipin ko'y parak
Mg bataan ko ay trapo
Pamilya'y bilyonaryo
Ang negosyo'y protektado.
Unlimited supply—'yan ang tunay kong pangako
Subok kong mga suki, wala pa rin namang nagbago
Tuloy lang ang bentahan, dito tayo sa taas
Ngunit tatandaan: kikitilin lahat ng Hudas.
Ako'y panginoon at walang katalo-talo
Agimat ko ay tsapa, baril ang gamit kong rosaryo
Ako ang humuhuli sa sarili kong buntot
Ang mahina **** kokote ay aking pinapaikot.
Aug 10, 2017
Aug 10, 2017 at 1:57 PM UTC
Gusto ko ring
maranasang makulong
para naman
magka-thrill
kahit kaunti
ang buhay kong
napaka-boring.
Pero gusto kong
makulong
nang walang
ginagawang
anumang
krimen.
At a loob ng kulungan
ay pabahuan
ng hininga,
kili-kili,
puwet
at singit;
paramihan
ng libag sa leeg,
tinga sa gilagid,
kalyo sa labi,
at tartar sa ngipin.
Doon na rin
masusubok
ang aking
pagiging
best actor
sa pagkukunwaring
makadiyos ako
sa pagdadala ko
ng banal na libro
sa lahat ng oras,
minu-minuto
upang parolya
ay aking matamo
at kinabukasan
ay laya na ako.
Hustisya
ay kaydaling
laruin,
sistema
ay kaydaling
butasin,
buong kuwento
ng aking tula
ay uulit-ulitin.
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017 at 12:30 AM UTC
I saw the piece that'll complete me.
I saw it again.
Maybe, you're confused
And I am so nervous
So how could I start my story?
When I just saw my missing piece?
I am a puzzle
And he's a puzzle piece
I am a mindful art.
A black and white one; gloomy, simple, boring.
I am contented with my life, I am not looking for more.
But then, he came.
He came to me like a thunderstorm
And I cannot do anything because I'm a mere stone.
He's a poor lost soul
And I'm willing to became his foolish map
I was hypnotized with his colorful gaze
And I fell deep.
Yes, I am.
I really am. I knew it was trouble,
He's a trouble.
But I am a willing victim, a suicidal prey
Who’s begging for more.
God! I am pathetic!
I know, those laughter's and fears are worth it.
I know that every burst of anger, every drop of tears are worth it.
I am nothing but a handicapped
When it comes to him.
He used to hug me with his fire- coated body,
It could burn my skin. I am well aware of everything.
Yet I let him.
He touched me like
He's taking the air of my lungs with him
And I know it's deadly
But I can give it all to him.
He's a parasite within my mind, heart, body and soul.
He corrupted me.
He became my skin.
My air to breathe.
I did everything so we could fit perfectly.
And that's when I realized.
I realized that he cannot love me as I love him.
He cannot sacrifice himself as I could give my life for him.
He was selfish, I am selfless.
He was composed of color, I am made of black and white.
That's when it hit me.
I am **** too late to realize! **** too late.
I was falling deep
But I am falling into an abyss of confusion,
An abyss of emptiness and sorrow in the pits of hell.
I am broken.
No, I am always broken.
I look at him blindly and I am at fault.
Maybe I am just desperate
But I am ready to be a fool for him.
I'm a willing victim, a suicidal prey.
I look at him blindly
And forgot that he's a colorful art and
I am just black and white.
I look at him blindly
And forgot that he was a walking disaster
and trouble to my life.
I look at him blindly
And forgot that he's punishing me
With his every touch.
I look at him blindly! I look at him blindly.
But, I cannot look straight at him
'Cause I already gave up… so I am letting him go.
He shattered me into pieces
And now, I'm all alone
As sadness started to grow.
I saw the piece that'll complete me.
I saw it again.
I knew how I reacted
As I saw my missing piece.
I saw it! I saw it.
But I know, someone already took it
Because it is not my puzzle to fit.
Dec 19, 2015
Dec 19, 2015 at 10:35 AM UTC
I'm ready for something real.
I'm tired of being the curtains that are pulled closed every-night.
I once gave a boy my glass heart, and he held it dear,
and then, he moved away. And I was packed inside a box,
it was labeled, 'fragile,' 'handle with care.'
It wasn't for months that I saw the sun,
and when I did, I couldn't tell the difference
between artificial, and sunlight.
Once again, he held me in his hands,
but they were rough and calloused;
the security was gone.
I was placed in a corner where I was rarely touched again,
and one night something terrible must've happened,
my smooth exterior seemed to have sharpened at the edges,
and he placed me in a bin, never to be seen again.
There's vases that hold flowers,
and there's vases that are placed in china cabinets;
I'm tired of being falsely decorated.
I'm tired of having to hold everything in,
and be expected to be the beautiful centerpiece
for everyone to glance at, and walk by.
I am beautiful, but I am not a centerpiece.
I am also a collection of flaws;
I'm translucent: all my emotions flood,
and I'm fragile; I tend to break at the slightest touch,
and I'm empty,
until someone fills me up.
But I want something real.
I don't want to hold plastic flowers,
that will never fade away.
I want to hold the beautiful rose
and at it's prime time,
though I will cry,
I can say it was real.
I can say he was mine.
(NJ2014) All Rights Reserved.
Sep 29, 2014
Sep 29, 2014 at 4:51 PM UTC
There are 1,013,913 words in the English language, and not one of them describes how I feel about you, about us.
Maybe its because I lost my words when I first kissed you, when I placed my kiss on them strawberry preserve lips so in the future when you asked me, ‘hunny, where is the last place you saw them?’ I could answer –‘in you’
But I’ll pretend, I’ll play dumb, and search for them like I never knew the universe lived beneath your tongue, as I never want to find them words in case in finding them I misplace you.
And I never want to lose you. To find you in my box of lost and found on a Sunday afternoon amongst tattered dictionaries that are filled with love poems I can no longer speak.
Full of pronouns that hide bener dust which you make angels in, changing he to she, him to her, spreading your arms to chase the rabbits that jump out from these open sheets.
And seeing you lying there, I am both lost and found, no longer bound by the binding of those before you. All I can say is ‘ darling, the Greeks didn’t see you coming’.
There are not enough letters in the alphabet to write this love poem. To assemble a word that describes the way you smile at me, like how the moon draws pictures of the shore, or the way mountains bend to kiss the clouds.
You leave me speechless.
Its hard to believe, but its true.
Sometimes we forget to listen to that pivotal silence that the orchestra plays. Composed in exquisite harmony to ****** suspense through an empty script, in a pause, a breath; an instrumental craftsmanship that maneuvers you through that moment where you enter the protagonists’ kiss.
That’s how I feel about you. About us.
There are 1,013,913 words in the English language, and only one of them stands out to me: you.
Sep 8, 2014
Sep 8, 2014 at 4:06 AM UTC