#sledgehammer
Words have always been an effective method of construction. In fact, if I ever wanted to build a wall, I would use nothing but my shoddy verbal and written constructs, and it would be stronger than my willpower and higher than the same wall you've built for yourself.
I keep saying I'm just tired, but you're disputing that fact and I'm sleeping at nights as if nothing were wrong, but when I sleep like that, I know it's all wrong. I don't miss the way things used to be, I miss the way I used to be.
I've got this ridiculous theory that you can love someone without being in love. Call me crazy, right? There's got to be some kind of distinction, but with you, the lines don't make sense. And I can't imagine a world of mine without you in it.
I'd like an out, a kind of escape from the harsh truth that you're a boy, and I'm a girl and our skies don't line up. I've got a long driveway with a lot of trees and stars above them, and you've got a life trajectory that doesn't include me and never will. The second you realize there's a hole in your pocket is the second you know that you lost your hope.
Mowers that bump and buses that jolt are two things that cause anxiety. Sometimes the only way to reach me is through my poetry, my cracks and chips. Hand me a sledgehammer, we're all crumbling anyway.
Jul 11, 2016
Jul 11, 2016 at 4:20 PM UTC
Dear Sledgehammer Heart,
You are tough as nails,
and you are also soft as silk.
You are wildflowers
blossoming in the spring,
and again in the summer.
You bloom more for yourself,
than for anyone else.
You are both student and teacher
with fistfuls of love,
clenched for those that hurt.
You taught me
the importance of a good porch:
The Foundation Must Be Solid.
A Home can be built anywhere,
as long as the Foundation is Solid.
You taught me to announce myself,
and to be proud of the songs that come out.
*(Even when the sounds are sharp,
they must be set free somehow, right?)*
And you taught me
how to handle a heart
as delicate as mine
pretends not to be,
with soft hands and gentle love
Stones smoothed into little pebbles
at the bottom of a river.
I can only hope I have learned
to hold your heart
with the skill and grace of bird wings
And to lift you
higher
as you do me.
It is the only way I can think to return
the lightness
you gift by existing.
Please remember,
My Sledgehammer Man,
you must simply exist
and the universe is lighter
for it.
Jun 22, 2015
Jun 22, 2015 at 2:08 PM UTC
To even think you want me
Is wishful thinking done to death.
You just don't want to be the one to break me.
But you're what breaks me best.
Mar 17, 2015
Mar 17, 2015 at 11:53 AM UTC