#self-deception
I don't believe you,
That I can't change the past.
I believe that I only need
The right level of access.
I'll live in the past with my friend regret
Refusing to venture further future.
I'll cling to hope misplaced long ago
With almost enough rope to hang
With more than enough to secure
Familiar safe harbour.
Or perhaps to suspend belief from high hopes
Long enough to cast adrift
With just the ever present wind to give direction.
Draft #2
I don't believe you,
That I can't change the past.
I believe that I only need
To dwell on it a little more.
I'll harbour in the past with my friend, regret,
Refusing to venture further future.
I'll cling to hope misplaced long ago
With almost enough rope to hang,
With more than enough to fasten
To that familiar safe haven
And one day I'll suspend my belief from high hopes,
Forlorn and cast adrift
With a tried and true ill wind to give direction
And find safe pasture.
Draft #3
I don't believe you,
That I can't change my past.
I believe that I only need
To dwell on it a little more
And so prise it open.
I'll shelter with my old friend,
Regret,
Refusing to venture further future.
I'll cling to a hope that I misplaced long ago
With almost enough rope to hang from,
With more than enough to fasten myself
To that familiar safe haven.
And one day I'll suspend my belief
From high hopes, forlorn and cast adrift,
With my tried and tested ill wind
That will direct me and will find me
a well worn safe past and safe pasture.
Oct 4, 2016
Oct 4, 2016 at 4:09 PM UTC
When you go back
Maybe it is to even the score
But it scares us.
Being hit one time should
Tell you that you are
Just going back for more.
The past has promised
Nothing will probably
Ever change.
You don’t seem to know
How it hurts those
Who love you so.
You can’t seem to fit it
Into your head
That we fear the next call
Will be to tell us
That you are dead.
He beats you and then
When he is not
He’ll saying ugly things.
That’s the kind of
White knight you have got.
You call him wonderful
When he’s not a snot.
We keep telling you
Wake up, wretched girl
He is certainly not.
Sometimes you tell us
You want to give him a chance
To explain things to you
But he can only give
Some more lies because
That’s what liars do.
And you tell lies as well
Or why else go back
To that personal hell?
You go back because
To be alone scares you
Almost as well
As being berated and
Beaten like a bell.
But we don’t want this!
To know you are hurting
And bruised by
A man you should be deserting
For a life where people
Can be trusted with love
And not to shove a fist
Into a battering glove.
Don’t go back, beloved.
If you do you tie our hands.
Some of us understand
But that doesn’t mean
That we agree with your choice.
Listen to the voice
Of reason when we say
Don’t go back for more today.
Or ever again.
Oct 8, 2015
Oct 8, 2015 at 2:33 AM UTC