#secretservice
Lawrence Hall, HSG
[email protected]
14 August 2024
Comparing our Secret Service with Barney Fife is Inappropriate
Because we love and respect Deputy Fife
In art, incompetence can have a certain charm
But in stupid men with guns the charm is lacking
Our agents can’t even keep themselves from harm
Their greatest skills are in shacking and slacking
Colombian girlies and slanting roofs
Unman the best of them; they lose their guns
They lose laptops, but never their 90-proof
And break into private property for poopy runs
To them a President entrusts his life –
He’d surely be safer with Deputy Barney Fife
Aug 14, 2024
Aug 14, 2024 at 10:51 AM UTC
Lawrence Hall
[email protected]
https://hellopoetry.com/lawrence-hall/
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com
President Doctor Jill’s
Really, Really Secret Service Beefcake Boys
O that he were here to write me down an *** But,
masters, remember that I am an *** though it not be
written down, yet forget not that I am an ***
-Dogberry, Constable of the Watch,
Much Ado About Nothing, IV.ii.76ff
Swimming-pool chums, closer than a brother
Flexing their guns and tats at each other
Nobody know who the new agents are
(Wanna ‘phone, wanna flat, wanna shiny new car?)
Want some shiny new tech toys, loads and loads?
What’ll you take for those nuclear codes?
Hunter’s good buddies living large on the beach
One says he misses his Colombian peach
$30K a month down in Malibu
To protect an artist (but not me or you)
Nothing to see here; now don’t get nervous
For we are the party-hearty Secret Service!
(Say, babe, what’s your sign? You come here often...?)
Apr 8, 2022
Apr 8, 2022 at 10:31 PM UTC