#sadistic
I sat there, drained of hope,
Searching for a way to elope,
Wishing for the heavens to speak,
To let my punishment begin.
Take me to the Eternal Judgment,
To slave like a dog as penance for my sins.
I'll unveil the vices I hid through my skin.
Offer me that tragic death-
Good God, I'll give you my life;
Please demand a sacrifice.
Bring the whole realm;
Find something to feast upon,
The Darkest Shade of Sin;
As I point "I am right here"
There are no lords and kings,
When the ritual begins.
There is no sinful innocence than my unmarked misdeeds.
In the madness and tears:
Of my vivid death scene,
Only in the depths of my mortal coil;
My soul will find its clarity.
Oct 27, 2024
Oct 27, 2024 at 2:39 PM UTC
What intrigues
The flint
To spark a thought?
Is it sadistic?
Is it sympathetic?
Recognizable,
Understandable,
Plausible?
Do you ever
Know enough?
Lost in search for
The heart
Of the matter
Do you truly believe
In this world
You've created?
Apr 23, 2022
Apr 23, 2022 at 3:50 PM UTC
He seems happy, right ?
You hear him laugh, you see him smile.
But did you take the time to look in his eyes?
All you will find is his void echoing with silence.
He sits all by himself locked up in his room,
Smothered in his darkness,
With heavy thoughts and what ifs,
He clutches his tear stained pillow.
He sits up and looks around his room.
To see that the only person there is
Him.
The only person who hears his agonising cries
Is he himself.
He screams in his silence but no one cares,
His pain goes unnoticed, no one can tell,
His smile is like that of an angel, but he lives through hell,
His eyes brim with madness as he strikes at the walls.
So he tucks his melancholy away,
He wears a mask roughly designed of:
Pretend jokes, fake smiles and happy lies.
He’s at constant war with himself,
For caring about people who don’t care about him.
Nobody knows it’s empty,
The smile he wears,
No one knows that the pain he feels slowly devours his soul,
If only you looked deeper within,
You’d see that he was dying inside,
You say that you know him,
But truly, you know nothing at all.
Dec 14, 2021
Dec 14, 2021 at 10:20 AM UTC
the fool
created his own woes
sorrows laid into his red nose
dirt fills his mind
nothing pure and full of sin
sadistic miseries fill him within
the fool only knows negatives
his life called for nothing but ridicule
if only the fool knew
that he could command an audience
he rather cry in silence
die and rot away to the dirt that used to fill him
Jun 13, 2021
Jun 13, 2021 at 8:27 PM UTC
Sadistic, sinister:
The evil twin sister
I fight, I resist,
But sometimes I still miss her...
From birth was a friction –
Affliction – a blister
Now alive, I must die
Every day and dismiss her
.
Nov 10, 2020
Nov 10, 2020 at 9:15 AM UTC
Break up with your girlfriend,
Shatter her heart in two.
Make her cry every night,
Make her hurt over you.
Leave her today,
Tonight, or the ‘morrow.
Abandon her and leave her laden in sorrow
Make her drown in her tears,
Make her shake with her cries,
Break her, break her,
Break her down with your lies.
Come back to me,
I can love you forever.
Come back to me,
And we’ll be together.
One kiss,
One kiss,
Is all I ask.
To honor the present and remember the past.
One kiss will do no harm,
Where’s the shame in that?
Kiss me once and maybe the memories will flood back.
Break up with your girlfriend,
Leave her for me.
Make her feel so worthless,
All while we feel so free.
You know you want to.
Don’t deny yourself this.
Break up with your girlfriend,
Break her with one kiss.
Make her never forget.
Make her never lose sight.
That love is sadistic,
And so are we, right?
Feb 6, 2020
Feb 6, 2020 at 10:41 AM UTC
Sadistic minds think alike,
our bodies create a work of art.
While my ********* side,
gives you full control of my body.
Your deep moans and rapid breathing,
feeding my darkest desires.
I'm trusting you with my life,
as your grip around my neck tightens.
You use my body for your pleasure,
while your hands forget to be gentle.
Leaving marks across my pale skin,
as a reminder of the night you owned me.
Oct 18, 2019
Oct 18, 2019 at 7:39 AM UTC
I broke down once again , in the middle of my journey,
The tears on my face , do they really seem to be funny?
I scream on my mother , call my father a ******
I m really sorry daddy for opening my mouth.
I go crazy on my failures , i can't bear them anymore,
I don't want my parents to fight and my little brother to sore.
I just hate myself for breaking their precious dreams,
Sorry mama , i couldn't get you anything , but just tears and screams.
How do parents manage to love thier children and never negotiate?
Those children who think that their parents are their worst fate.
My mother
She wakes up in the morning works up until late.
She washes up the dishes regardless of the date,
I never see her complaining about the pain that I give her.
She always motivates me and never scolds for my failures,
My father
He works day and night for us , so that we can have fancy meals,
He used to give me what i wished, a kiss was all he asked from me,
I couldn't do at that time and now regret upon those deals,
I can't describe his generousness in words , i feel afraid god might curse me.
As I feel myself broken and everytime I sigh,
I sob upon my father's shoulder or sleep on my mother's thigh.
I don't know why they love me the way that I be,
Are they tied towards relations? Or its their unconditional love towards me?
I have seen two of the best people in my life,
And I wish they stay safe, happy here after cuz now,
They are free from their toughest phase,
I am sorry I couldn't do , what you wished for,
I worked hard completely ,but i can't manage to hurt u anymore.
God give them all the happiness and their life's best days,
Give them someone who can manage to be worthy of their praise.
Aug 7, 2019
Aug 7, 2019 at 12:40 PM UTC
He was a simple guy with no big dreams,
He used to watch horror movies just to hear her screams.
She was as beautiful as an angel from heaven,
Perfect red and sweet as a fresh watermelon.
She said she had come from a strange place,
Their friendship had just taken a good pace.
The Warmth of her body made him forget all his pains,
Her soft hands had become a necessity for the blood in his veins.
He felt her as protective as the earth's ozone,
He felt she would never ever leave him alone.
But one day she vanished like a meteor in the universe,
Maybe it was all a dream, but his rest life felt like a curse.
He had spent his best days of his life with her,
He didn't know that she ll make him suffer.
No one knew where she had gone,
With a broken heart he was left alone.
He spent nights wandering about the street,
Hoping for just one last meet.
But Nothing was expected to be better,
He remained just a lifeless piece of matter.
His only moon for the nights had vanished,
She was the only girl whom he had cherished.
On this night of despair he was alone,
Left with a broken heart , rather a stone.
Will his love drive him to her ?
Maybe god had chosen him to suffer.
Jul 26, 2019
Jul 26, 2019 at 2:43 AM UTC
Your body beneath me
A blade pressed to your chest
Do you trust me?
Sadistic thoughts swarm my brain
Like a nest of angry wasps
A thin line
Dripping crimson honey
Your breath becomes sharp
A dull ache in my skull
Demons speaking into my ear
The knife in my hand is so tempting
I carve another line
One after one and I still ain’t done
The steal comes down full force
Tearing past flesh and bone
I can’t help but to let out a little moan
Hands painted red
Shoving my fingers in the open wounds
Can I make someone so numb feel pain?
Watching the light fade from your dark eyes
I always wanted to be your end
I promise I’ll kiss it better
But now I have you
Nothing can take you from me
The cold metal to my neck
Slices past the cartilage
Feeling warmth drip into my lungs
My vision filled with dark clouds
I mutter and choke out my last words
I love you
Apr 23, 2019
Apr 23, 2019 at 9:57 PM UTC
ｐｌｅａｓｕｒｅ
ａｓ
ｐａｉｎ
he told his partners
unwitting souls
commanded by his
physical
beauty
strong
self assured
manner
unwillingness 2 accept
anything but compliance
acquiescence
compelling
in his self assurance
many were led into his lair
gullible
some to escape
never the being they’d been
some
attempting
to flee
flogged into further submission
and eternal darkness
pleasure as pain
he told them
the once innocents
© 2017
rf
Apr 1, 2019
Apr 1, 2019 at 9:03 PM UTC
Sadistic Lovers
I'm not so sure that I can see your point
when your dagger is buried deep in the spine
that's wrapped around your finger;
A silver will bent across your golden trigger.
It won't be long 'til you find another guy,
that's willing to waste your time.
When it's all said and done
and your mouth's around the gun
you'll see that Sadistic love is blind.
Feb 5, 2019
Feb 5, 2019 at 4:12 PM UTC
Cutting and bruising,
Bleeding, while we drive, street cruising.
Live fast, die young,
All while trying to steal your tongue.
Your so cute when you blush,
And when you bleed just enough,
Do you trust me? Your forced to now….
I mean, your in love with me anyhow….
I’ll, treat you like in item, you just love being used!
Even though you you kick and scream, you want to be abused!
Call me a sadist, and we’ll get along just fine….
Just never ******* dare, touch what's mine!
Jan 30, 2019
Jan 30, 2019 at 3:29 PM UTC
Could you capture patience and haste
Skin softer than silk a body with delicious taste
Inhibitions non existent
Lustful desires persistent
Entangled like vines
Who have weaved through the fence
A sadistic touch to watch you tense.
Submission a form of primal love
Pain and arousal both in the same glove
What we do a release
A moment of peace
Lost inside chaos.
Nov 24, 2018
Nov 24, 2018 at 3:52 PM UTC
momentary feelings of contentment
appear in the solace of substance abuse
my personal pockets of happiness
presenting itself in seductive caramel pills
family tradition collapsed in my bottomless glass
thick fluid dancing amongst cubes of comfort
sacrificing sanity for seconds of clarity forgotten
four minutes of freedom from my insecure narration
i awaken to mistake stained sheets mangled violently beneath me
but this alien form I present in doesn't communicate my thoughts
for my aching fleshy cage is not made of meat nor cartilage
skin of sin engulf my devious bones pulse ticking like a time bomb
I still feel the grime stuck beneath my fingernails
I claw and scrape but the sludge takes permanent residence
the harmfully minuscule reminder of failure pushes me off the edge
falling forever but never reaching my deserved demise
stuck in limbo I'm trapped in a bleaker version of purgatory
last nights choices weigh painfully on my intestines
boulders of regret forcing my anxious form to fasten in its decent
but the comforting splat never reaches my deformed ears
it is here in the free fall I carry out my personal catastrophe
shirt ***** stained as my permanent plummet sickens me
years of sinking pass as i endure my eternal punishment
my immortal agony mutates into a sadistic contentment
a sheen of sweat sticks regularly to my aching soul
a permanent hangover and a never-ending come down
i find more than peace in this cataclysm
amidst my deserved torture pain melts into a masochistic enjoyment
Now I'm absolutely mad
flesh falling away from my body
the only tissue that remains holds my grin firmly in place
Happy as sin
Nov 10, 2018
Nov 10, 2018 at 10:15 AM UTC
You cannot create a monster
and then condemn it
hate its ugly features
it’s terrible gait
You cannot be afraid
to look into it’s cold eyes
touch it’s rough skin
or feel it’s hot breath
You must face the consequences
Because
when I look into the mirror
I do not see myself
but all of what you’ve made me
I see pale skin
and bruised lips
and bloodied knuckles
and a demonish grin
I see a monster
ready to do monstrous things.”
Sep 21, 2018
Sep 21, 2018 at 7:50 AM UTC
The long-forgotten cigarette slowly eats from my fingers..
It's just me..a glass of whiskey..and a handful of stress..
To keep me up all night..
I ***** up all my memories..so there's nothing left but a white page of nothingness..
And I slice the anger out of my veins..
Instead I'm rewarded with warm..thick...blood
I step on the broken glass shards to escape my dark chamber..
And I think I must burry the dog lying in the corner for five days..
I try to embrace the grass that dwells outside for some rest..
Yet her screams keep following me..
Madly I'm running to the bathroom..
Relieved to see she was still swimming in her pool of blood in the bathtub..with my knife in her heart..
Oh! The joy I'm in.. seeing her with me at last..
In bitter and sweet..until life do us apart..
I can't stop laughing..I can't stop loving you..
Why won't you talk..speak to me!!
SPEAK TO ME!!
I remember that silence is your language..
So I bring a needle and thread..sew my mouth shut..
So I can speak your silence..love..
Oh! The anger is slowly draining from my veins..
So I lie next to you..how delicious you blood tastes!!
I fiddle with a fork as I'm waiting for my life..
Sticking it over and over in that funny- looking rat..
Oh! How hilarious his squeaks are!!
My head is lighter now..my vision..blur..
And I live..next to my pale beauty..
We live together as nocturnal animals.. silently wandering in the night of a bleeding moon..
Aug 29, 2018
Aug 29, 2018 at 6:54 AM UTC
the darkest of my fantasies whisper
Your body is a scuba suit
insist i breath with your ******* through your mouth
dive deep into claustrophobic waters, sink heavy to the rock bottom
where we petrify by gorgans gaze
i know we'll turn to stone because, of course, the gorgans can't resist gazing at You
nobody can resist gazing at You, land or sea.
Our permanent legacy, lost under layers of life
barnacles clinging, moss burying Our chimera god/snake skin
i am without Your oxygen
when breathing would terrorize the wind
where words belong
still, my forked tongue writes
i'm a theif to say i only want You to be happy
when i had You, it was still selfish
the revolving doors of pain and perseverance
more time invested in us
then money invested in the Pills that kept me from killing You
out of habit
You begged me to beat You
it's been seven hands dealt
rubbing my 5 o'clock sandpaper chin
on the tarot card of death
my tolerance for vacancy
a brownish red stain
i've only the thin line of medication between necrophilia and sociopathy
i want to lay with You at the bottom of the sea
**the Pills... where are...
please no, God.
The Voice, run!
get out!**
*I would gladly go to prison
to **** your lifeless body.
I would gladly **** Myself in the afterglow
of your affection.
there is only one true Sin, Objectification.
I indulge relapse
in every memory, find
your shed snake skin
pull it on, like your *******
how disturbed I've become
with you gone*
how selfish of you
of course "I" blames You
when the Pills dull
i indulge by studying Your location
i know where You escape too
i want to go there
does that scare You?
i want to bump into You
apoligise for what i want
"want" as a word
is like plexi-glass, or kevlar
standing between Us
keeping the bullet safe.
i want a hard impact
in a school hallway
where we drop all our
Books and look up and You
see my ghost, that would be enough for Me
i want the impact to hurt.
i want the tumbling of all our Book's
i want the messy hair and ripped knees,
then Our
eyes to meet
and linger
I want to watch the fear fill you.
i want to sit there,
watching.
petrify from parcel tongues
as i gaze at Your gorgon body
shedding skin
if i shed my snakeskin,
maybe i'll see You
i can't leave this Poem
i can't leave this Poem yet
i won't leave this Poem
please kick me out
Poem
Poem
end Me
..
end
.
I
..
Jul 17, 2018
Jul 17, 2018 at 8:17 AM UTC