#ruminations
Il fait trop de bruit dans ma tête
Les voix de mes peurs
Fouillent les blessures de mon ame
Leurs braillements occupent chaque recoin
Et mangent l'oxygène de ma boîte crânienne
Je leur hurle qu'elles ont tort
Que je refuse d'écouter leurs cris
Qui veulent fendre mes certitudes
Mordre le silence
Dans l'enfer de ma conscience
Anéantir mes voeux de sérénité
Pour mieux me persuader
Que je suis un démon déguisé
Mais mes tortionnaires insistent et aboient
Une litanie de confessions forcées
Ces bêtes jappent leur perfidie
Ressassent que je me trompe que je mens
Que je vole que je triche
Que ça ne sert à rien
Que je suis définitivement perdue
Je ne peux pas arrêter ce bruit
Dans la douleur de ma lucidité
Je peux seulement tenter de l'ignorer
Le contourner d'une parenthèse
Le temps d'une course salvatrice
Dans un grand rayon de soleil
Dans les profondeurs des eaux froides
Dans quelque ligne de poésie
Mais les images intrusives surgissent encore
Des amas de chair
Des flammes de l'enfer
Ou au contraire un noir total
Un puits sombre et abyssal
Et je me débats de toutes mes forces
Je hurle mon cri d'impuissance
Pour conjurer ces visions atroces
Je projette la force de ma résistance mentale
Je cours de plus en plus ****
De plus en plus vite
Mais on ne s'évade pas de son destin
Encore moins de sa prison intérieure
Dec 3, 2025
Dec 3, 2025 at 9:50 AM UTC
Les pensées ne sont que pensées,
Des fantômes nés dans mon esprit,
Silhouettes que je vois danser
Et que je nourris malgré moi, sans répit.
C’est une machine infernale,
Qui tourne, invente, se déchaîne,
Créant démons, visions fatales,
Monstres gonflés de peur ancienne.
Mais ces monstres, sous la lumière,
Ne sont que pantomines fragiles.
Quand j’écris, ils deviennent poussière ;
Quand je cours, leur pouvoir vacille.
Le soleil les fait fondre un moment,
Sans les dissoudre entièrement :
Ils reviennent, inlassablement,
Dans un perpétuel mouvement.
Je cherche la force pour enfin
Éteindre la lanterne magique,
Ancêtre des mirages sans fin
Où ma tête se complique
Pour laisser mon esprit reposer
**** de ses visions insensées.
Dec 2, 2025
Dec 2, 2025 at 5:50 PM UTC
Sometimes i wonder...
If the things i want are things i need
If these glasses really help me to see
If there was ever a need for a king and a queen
What its gonna take for my insides to beam
Most days I ask...
Am I considering all sides of the situation?
Am i the Frankenstein of this creation?
Could this be blamed on my medication?
Why am i filled with such frustration?
But typically I'm just left feeling...
Like the push and pull is uneven
Like someone is always leaving
Like its too broken to recieve again
Like theres gotta be something I can believe in.
Dec 2, 2022
Dec 2, 2022 at 10:05 AM UTC
An oblique shoe string
Hangs from a power line
knotted through
the wrong holes
A baby carriage on
the sidewalk
just left out
in the cold
a golden autumn
November tree
sheds her last leaf
she weeps and she mourns
nothing left
to be solved
these puzzles
make me sick
pieces are rotted mold
when you put them
together
its a lonely kid
the letters blank
ink pens run
out of code
The apartment
I live in is still the
Bloodiest brick red
stained relationships
I neglected
Its a splattered
picture on my white wall
Three wolves
each take turns
trying to blow me down
i guess these children
stories held
Some sort truth to them
after all
I just stand tall
like the effiel
tower im
builts for
world affair
Im was just hoping
for this morning
to be a symbol
of peace
listen for
a silent noise
a whisper
a vendor yelling
in the street
but its just loud
its violent creatures
and its laying in my
bed next to me
Dec 1, 2020
Dec 1, 2020 at 4:28 PM UTC
Is your bedroom ceiling,
As dark as mine?
Can you see in,
The night?
Is it pebbled,
Is it flat,
What do the,
Shadows look like?
Can you look up,
And see your dreams,
Or just see concrete,
And beams.
Oct 20, 2020
Oct 20, 2020 at 10:27 AM UTC
I found a boardwalk in the woods
leading, seemingly, to nowhere,
In a timberland swamp I knew from much younger days;
Decaying and rotten,
Most likely long forgotten.
I wondered how long it had been there, abandoned to its fate:
Quietly mocked by the still standing timbers,
As yet spared the sawmills blade,
For its needless sacrifice, useless decay
As its strength is silently weathered away;
used
but unrequited,
wasted,
faded and unmade.
I followed along its decrepit path
as far as I could make,
and so laughed to myself as I thought aloud,
"Such is life's disarray."
Dec 4, 2019
Dec 4, 2019 at 6:39 PM UTC
My memories become
Motionless in midnight
Adept to freeze frames
Still seconds of past scenes
Linger on auditory loops
Repeat, remix, replay
Motionless my memories
Become in midnight
And at some point
The Spielberg center of my soul
Screams cut
Dec 6, 2018
Dec 6, 2018 at 12:49 AM UTC
Time is a monster,
that eats away your soul.
A nibble here.
A nibble there.
Until it takes its toll.
Unstoppable.
Unmeasured.
Undeniably the truth.
Time is a monster.
And it's favorite food is youth.
Nov 22, 2018
Nov 22, 2018 at 1:05 AM UTC
Even in the darkest night
With winds cold kiss that tempest that batters
I would find or make shelter and light
To ruminate on all that matters
Of want and needs
Of those that do and don't
Of good and bad deeds
Of those that will and won't
Of death decay growth and life
Of joy and sorrow
Of triumph and strife
Of hope on the morrow
Of dew on a blade of grass
Of sunlight through trees
Of critical mass
Of conversations and the flight of bees
~Wes Noneya ©
Feb 4, 2017
Feb 4, 2017 at 8:46 AM UTC
I found a boardwalk in the woods
leading, seemingly, to nowhere,
In a timberland swamp I knew from younger days;
Decaying and rotten, likely long forgotten.
I wondered how long it had been there, abandoned to its fate:
quietly mocked by the still standing timbers
(as yet spared the sawmills blade),
for its needless sacrifice; as its strength is weathered away - used but unrequited - wasted, faded and unmade.
I followed along its decrepit path
as far as I could make,
and laughed to myself and thought,
"Such is life's disarray."
Dec 15, 2016
Dec 15, 2016 at 10:32 PM UTC
To let go...to release one's grip,
Not hold on anymore,
Walk away,
Rip it off,
Break it...
Though it cannot be undone.
The point is...it was done,
It occurred, or it happened!
What was, was
What is, is
What is to be, will be!
What we were, we were
What we are, we are
What we will be...well...if we are to be, will be!
To let go is not easy.
It could be, but...
It also could not!
We could let it be,
Whatever that may be,
However it is to be!
'To let go requires the now.
What was done requires to let go now.
Let go now what was done,
Also requires to let be what will be!
To let go and let it be is part of the process of being,
It requires the now.
To let it go...
And let it be...
Past. Present. Future.
The one that stands above these is the present.
The present allows us to look to the past for lessons for the future.
The present is the best present!
The present! The gift!
Aug 9, 2016
Aug 9, 2016 at 2:56 PM UTC
i dream of the day
where i’ll be able to say
i know how to enjoy
Free Time, Me Time, Time
Alone with no crimes,
instead of yearning for
hours at a job i deplore
because i can’t bear myself
anymore
Mar 31, 2016
Mar 31, 2016 at 10:27 PM UTC
I’ve always been drawn
To the artists,
The new greats,
The aesthetes,
The painters,
The writers and the
Ones who dress
Like they’re out of
A low budget
Film from the 90s -
Chic, noir, vintage,
And just so strikingly
Unique. But I am not
Like them, and they
Do not like me - I
Am weird and aloof,
Sloppy and silly,
Withdrawn and witty,
Sporadic in art and
Thought. A nomad
Of culture and crowds,
Too deviant for them:
Au revoir.
Feb 20, 2016
Feb 20, 2016 at 2:08 PM UTC
Who am I?
I'm nobody special.
I drive the streets and give rides to strangers.
I stare at the night sky waiting for something amazing to happen.
I talk to God like how one talks to one's self.
I kiss my kids good night or goodbye as if it's my last.
I am waiting to die or for the coming of the holy king to establish his kingdom.
I could come across as dull or perhaps gloomy.
I adapt, but no longer...
For it does not what I do because I prefer to be nobody, because I am letting go!
Enoch walked with the Lord and was no more...
So to I shall be!
Jan 21, 2016
Jan 21, 2016 at 3:07 AM UTC
Time is,
When a child,
Like honey,
When grown,
Like a drying lake.
Dec 29, 2015
Dec 29, 2015 at 3:38 AM UTC
It's warm as I settle in.
My heart picks up speed,
We race in the thrusting motions,
Then calmly settle when I am in between you.
Dec 10, 2015
Dec 10, 2015 at 6:15 PM UTC
'If only' rules my life.
If I would only be more responsible...
If only I would be more daring...
If only...
If only...
If only...
If only...
If only!
If only I'd rid myself of these and just venture onward!
If only...
I would not be stagnant!
If only!
Dec 10, 2015
Dec 10, 2015 at 6:11 PM UTC
I am lost again.
Truly!
I have been here before,
Therefore I must be going in a circle!
Then I said, "Go forth!"
Only to stay.
Once more I say, "Go forth!"
Again, only to stay.
Fear.
It keeps me stagnant.
There is no growth,
Much less development.
My voice presents me as a pacifist,
But my heart is a fury!
I am but one of many lost,
In need of saving,
One who requires guidance, instructions, indications...
Perhaps a sort of map if you will.
The Stars point me to the North,
But my dazed and confused heart says, "Stay right where you are"
And a voice within that seems to say, "For you are not lost, but only walking blindly."
Dec 9, 2015
Dec 9, 2015 at 1:39 AM UTC
Lie there,
On the blanket,
On the grass.
Watch the leaf,
Hanging by a thread,
Glide down gradually.
See the clouds,
They intertwine,
Seemingly to kiss.
The butterfly will do just that...
Fly.
And the hummingbird,
It's wings hum.
This may seem cheesy,
And perhaps all too cliche,
But I swear to you...no photo will do this justice.
One must lie there,
In peace,
Without a phone, care, or worry.
Nov 2, 2015
Nov 2, 2015 at 3:44 PM UTC
I am not here.
I do not exist.
Before I proceed,
I must apologize,
For I have made this about me,
But...
It is all I know at the moment.
They will not hire me,
Neither will they accept the line I have thrown.
They will not inquire to find out what I could offer.
This is not a complaint.
I am merely stating what is obvious...to me!
Talent, language, and skill,
These are insufficient!
Might as well do away with me.
Just be rid of the unnecessary,
And all will be just peachy.
I am not here.
I do not exist.
Nov 2, 2015
Nov 2, 2015 at 11:24 AM UTC
Glorious morning dew...
On each leaf of grass,
On each leaf of the trees,
Covering the window shields,
But...
If only I can **** the undying noise;
The mowers near and far,
The mechanical birds overhead,
The storming of vehicles on the highways.
Still...
What glorious morning dew!
Oct 29, 2015
Oct 29, 2015 at 11:25 AM UTC
Last night I saw you with pristine perception.
After all, a voyage of discovery consists not in new landscapes,
But in seeing things differently.
And how I saw you as you kissed me consistently...
Bare as the Lord sent you to this world,
Not as the chic would have you,
But as I would,
And I was as aroused as any man could...
Marks of having given birth at your belly,
Sagging ***** from the feeding,
Skin smooth as butter,
And what my eyes beheld made my mouth water!
It was you who initiated the expression,
Which brought me so much fascination,
As you expressed your love passionately,
Done so gradually.
Sep 9, 2015
Sep 9, 2015 at 2:07 PM UTC
It feels like I am enslaved.
I am stuck in a system in which I do not know how to conduct myself.
Debts lie on the table.
They want to impose their chicness.
Pills are in my bag,
And prayer on my tongue.
I am the oddball,
And the oddball desires to be free.
Sep 8, 2015
Sep 8, 2015 at 1:57 PM UTC
Feed my children Lord!!
Food ain't scarce, but work!
Seems as if I'm unemployable!
Send rain Lord!!
First send the downpour of water,
Then send 20's, 10's, 5's, and singles as necessary!
I don't ask for much except this Lord!
It's not too much for an omnipotent being as you certainly are!
Have mercy Lord!!
I believe in you, but not half the block!
Many in the world believe too, but the unbelievers are growing in number!
Hear my cry Lord!!
Feed my children.
Send rain.
Have mercy.
Sep 3, 2015
Sep 3, 2015 at 2:27 PM UTC